Conferences, classes, workshops: we’re doing it wrong!
I had a very brief exchange on Twitter a few weeks ago with Neil aka @Neilochka.
And yes, I know you’re thinking, it’s Twitter! Of course it was a very brief exchange! What other kind is there? But what I mean is that we didn’t have a back-and-forth.
He said something. I said something back. That was it.
But it relates to something important, so I’m sharing it.
Here’s what he said:
Honestly — when most people spend hundreds of dollars to go to conferences, is it more for the networking than the actual conferences?
And here’s what I said:
Yes. Conferences are 98%+ the opportunity to meet people you think are cool.
If the content rocks then yay. But that’s icing.
Let’s talk about this.
Point one: screw the content.
Now admittedly when I design a course or program, I pour myself into content creation like you would not believe.
I do everything within my power to make sure that the people who sign up get blown away by awesomeness and come out of it with a ton of useful information that they would never have gotten anywhere else.
And there is much tweaking. Sure I may have dissolved a good 98% of my innate and debilitating perfectionist tendencies, but yeah, I still like to over-deliver.*
*Yes, 98% is the best percentage there is.
But when I go to a conference or go take someone else’s course, I treat the content as a bonus. Cherry on top.
Otherwise you get all caught up in “Hmm, he just made a less-than-genius point. Was this really worth a thousand dollars? Oh, wait, he just said something that could transform my business. Okay, worth it again.”
The activity or the theme (whatever it is that the conference or program is about) is the MacGuffin. You know, like the mysterious sheaf of papers whose existence drives all the action in a spy movie.
And the content (the material you’re going to learn) is a bonus.
Point two: the most important thing about a program.
It’s the connections.
One kind is, naturally, the other people in the course.
For example, you know where I became friends with the amazing Pam Slim and my favorite copywriter Kelly Parkinson (Copylicious)?
In a course.
Did I learn stuff there? Sure. But what I took away was so much more than the content — two wonderful girlfriends. Gifted, capable, sweet women who I admire so so so much.
Or the fact that whenever Pam — who aside from being smart and awesome is also super-famous and guest-blogs for the New York Times and stuff — decides to say something nice about me, I make a couple thousand dollars that day.
Which, by the way, more than covers what I paid for the course.
Or the fact that Kelly generously reads over the copy I write and gives me terrific feedback. Which is something I could be paying a couple thousand dollars for and instead I just sneak her advice and for some reason she thinks that’s a great deal.
Connections. Friendships. Torrid love affairs of the mind. This is sometimes also called “networking”.
Point three: the second most important thing about a program.
There’s another way that you can make connections in a conference or program, and that’s with the person or people leading or teaching there.
For example …
Andy Wibbels knows who I am and totally thinks I’m smart and stuff. That trip to Vancouver? Now Michael Port knows who I am too. He even knows my duck.
Do not underestimate the power of being in the sights of people you admire and respect.
Because even if you end up not meeting anyone among the participants — or even if you end up hating every single person there — the person leading it is probably someone you would really enjoy getting to know.
And being even a tiny blip on their radar can come in handy in all sorts of unexpected ways.
Alliances. Partnerships. Becoming a known entity. Putting yourself out there. This is also sometimes called “networking”.
Point four: the third most important thing about a program.
Well, of course. It’s a chance to show up and go around impressing people with what a freaking genius you are.
Just about every time I take someone else’s course I get some clients and a bunch of sales out of it. Not always, but more often than not.
It works because you’re there being your wacky self and occasionally spewing smartnesses.
Even if you’re a complete introvert (you may not believe this, but I am) of the kind (like me) that everyone mistakes for a snob … you can go with online programs.
You can shine in a forum environment or invisibly on a phone conference. And then you can work on getting better at hanging out with people live.
Because you’ll meet people. And they will think that you are the best thing since sliced bread. And you’ll be able to be of service to them — and not in some phony manipulative way, but in a genuine heart-centered sense of being in service.
And then they’ll know people who can help you. This is also sometimes called ….
Yes, I know you already know how “networking” works, but this whole “being supported by an amazing magic web of people who all do cool things for each other thing” has been blowing my mind lately.
Let’s review …
- Content? Hooray if it’s great, but really, it isn’t the point.
- It’s all about meeting amazing, interesting people.
- And helping them.
- And being helped by them.
- And impressing everyone else with your smartnesses.
Because the thing itself is always the MacGuffin. It’s the structure that allows for connection. The point is always the meeting up.
The connections that happen there. The opportunity for you to demonstrate your deep inner qualities of fabulousness.
And that cool shining heart-thing that happens when people relate to each other in a curious, excited, human way.
Of course now I have to go whip up some amazing content for something I’m working on … oh, it’s irony for lunch today!
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What a great point!
Now you’re making me wish, even more, that I’d been able to afford taking the course this first time around–all the cool kids are there, and I’m sitting home waiting for more jobs, and hoping I get enough of them before you offer the course again!
Just what I needed to read as I start to panic over this weekend’s upcoming festival. In the yarn-world, craft show’s and knitting meetups are the closest thing we have to conferences and I’m a vendor at one this weekend. I always get all nervous-shy, but end up loving the connections. There’s really nothing like chatting with a bunch of wool-minded folks who actually GET it!
Taras last blog post..Autumnal To Do
Aw, thanks, Havi! As a fellow introvertophiliac, I love online courses, because they let you meet people you want to meet, without having to make awkward conversation with strangers. In-person conferences also sound like they might be great for us introverts because they’re so highly structured and purposeful. I have no problem being a loudmouth if we’re talking ABOUT something. If you can think of nothing else to say, you can always ask a question about the material. And getting other people to weigh in with their perspectives makes the content more relevant, which means you can help the other person while helping yourself. OK, I’m sold, sign me up!
Wow, seminars and courses seem like an expensive way to network. Personally, I’m more interested in the content of a seminar/course/etc. rather than the networking side because I’ve never gained any benefit from networking. You ask them what they do, they ask what you do. I’ve found that either they’re not really interested, or they want to know everything about business so they can basically take your ideas. I’ve never gained a valuable contact from networking. Maybe I just go to the wrong events.
Exactly (though I REALLY like the cherry on top).
This is especially true if you are meeting people that you only interact with on-line. SOBCon comes to mind…
Scot Herricks last blog post..Announcing Cube Rules College — Career Learning for the Cubicle Warrior
It’s really interesting to read a new spin on the ‘content is king’ idea…different scenario, I know, but I like it : ).
Where do you find out about different courses — especially online ones?
Exactly. So everybody go to SXSW so Havi and I can meet you. Yes, we might give panels but they’ll be boring and useless. It’s the post-panel margaritas that we’re all really there for.
Great point, Havinator. And one that most people don’t have the chutzpah to say. (Am I Yiddish now? I think I might be Yiddish.)
Naomi Dunfords last blog post..Marketing in Troubled Times: Selling Power
Gosh shucks, thanks for the kind words!
I am SO glad that I took that course with you for the very reasons you suggested. Yes, the content was good and it was useful. But the connections were really amazing, and it absolutely did lead to “real” work and “real” money. (When I mentioned your and Naomi’s awesome course, you may have made a few thousand dollars, but due to your awesome partner program, I made $750 in Hershey money which is very handy for finishing my book.)
I can safely say that from being a *student* in a number of classes over the years I have made over $100,000 in income due to the partnerships I have formed.
It doesn’t work if you try to go out there and “vend” your services.
It does work where, as you say, you go looking for super-cool people whom you would love to work with and just be your badass self.
And my advice if you are taking a class — don’t be afraid to be the teacher’s pet. I did so by being totally proactive in my class, and ended up being invited by a few instructors to co-teach the same class at future sessions.
(not a nauseating teacher’s pet, a helpful one to other participants).
Go conferences! Go classes! Go cool people!
-Pam
Pamela Slims last blog post..Stop searching for the perfect job and start finding your life’s work
Excellent points Havi.
One more tip: reach early. The first few people you meet at a new event are usually the people who you’ll become fast friends with.
And so – if you reach early, you’ll have a chance of meeting the organizers and the speakers and other considerate folks who came early too.
(Only people who are willing to help will come early.)
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Love it, Havi! I’m a relatively new reader, and I’m digging you. Thanks for your hard work!
On your post: I’ve always been blessed to have terrific people in my life, but it’s really taken off now that I’m a managing editor in the nonprofit world. (Talk about people who live to reach out!)
And what amazes me all the more is how a positive cycle develops over time. You’re enthusiastic and eager to help … other enthusiastic people are eager to help you as a result … you get even MORE enthusiastic and eager to help others … those people build their enthusiasm … and pretty soon we’re on a constant human-to-human high. Not a bad place to be, I think. 🙂
Thanks for the great insights! I look forward to reading more!
I cannot wait for SXSW for just this reason. SOBCon was just one weepy luvfest for me. Like a Grateful Dead concert except substitute Jack Daniels for LSD.
Tara do you come back and read comments. Are you on the east coast? Are you going to the yarn thing I’m going to next weekend (18th, 19th)? I can try to look you up and mention that we’ve hung out in Havi’s comment space if you like? Or would that be scary internet stalker like? Or are you are SOAR this weekend? Wherever. Have a great time. Yarn things are so much less scary.
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Havs!
Dagnabit, looks like my other comment got eaten by WordPress.
What I wanted to say is THANK YOU for you extremely kind words. I was so lucky to meet you in our class, and watching your gentle words burst into bloom all over the internet is fantastic.
I have had amazing success with building friendships and business partnerships by participating in classes. In a few cases, I was asked by the instructor to co-teach a class after taking it. That led to some juicy contracts, and the chance to connect with even more cool people.
I will honestly say, no joke, that class-participation-related income over the last couple of years is at least 50,000. Nothing to sneeze at!
The key is to be yourself, and give everything you have to the class. In this case, being a teacher’s pet is a good thing.
Good stuff.
-Pam
Pamela Slims last blog post..Stop searching for the perfect job and start finding your life’s work
OMG SXSW is going to be EPIC.
Pam Slim is such a connector. Through her I met Havi, Communicatrix, and a lot of other cool people.
Also, I’m a broken record on this, but Twitter is just the best thing ever. It’s the next best thing to partying your ass off at a conference.
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