Personal ads. They’re … personal! Very.
So my itty bitty personal ads made me realize that it’s time to make a regular practice of trying to feel okay asking for stuff.
Even when the asking thing feels weird and conflicted.
Ever since I posted the first one asking my perfect house to find me, which united me with Hoppy House, I have been a fan of the madness that is personal ads.
And now it’s my Sunday ritual for clarity and remembering and stuff like that. Yay, ritual!
Let us dooo eeeet.
Thing 1: a name for a thing.
Here’s what I want:
There is a technique that I use when I’m projectizing.
It is extremely useful. I have no idea what to call it. And it’s complicated to describe.
So it really needs a name so that I can reference it (hey, I’m doing the thing that I always do) and teach it (hey, you can use this thing I do as another unlikely way to approach destuckifying whatever isn’t working).
Ways this could work:
Not sure. Maybe I’ll do some writing about this at the Kitchen Table, and see if people can help me out.
My commitment.
To come up with at least four examples.
To take notes.
To be patient with this.
To invoke Metaphor Mouse.
To trust that something will come, just like it did with naming the business.
Thing 2: a non-violent workout.
Here’s what I want:
This is kind of a follow-up to last week’s ask about spending more conscious time with my body.
So. I’ve been doing that in various ways and it’s been up and down. Mostly up.
But then I went to a pilates class and it was just … I was not right people for this particular class.
What I’d like:
To find a class (maybe dance routines, aerobics) that is laid back and pleasurable.
Where I can practice being with my body in ways that are mindful and experimental and maybe even joyful. And not constantly looking at the clock wondering when the torture is going to end.
Ways this could work:
I will do more internet research and ask around.
When asking, I will try to be really clear about what I don’t want — no violence, nothing with a ridiculous name, no yoga classes. And about my personal definitions and parameters.
Violence = anything that is about push push push instead of meet yourself where you are.
Ridiculous = acronyms, uncreatively smooshed-together words or anything with a trademark.
I don’t care how great Zumba is. I’m not going to do it because it’s called Zumba. Same for M.E.L.T. Same for Yogalates. Same for Pilyogics. Or Pilogarobics.
[Sincere apologies to any Zumba or Piloyoga teachers. I’m sure the thing you teach is fabulous. And I am probably missing out on it by being shallow and opinionated. That is the price I pay for being overly sensitive to words. My loss.]
And yes, I’m aware that I also teach something with a very problematic name (hello, Dance of Shiva), but that’s because it’s from an ancient practice. And at least I’m not calling it Shivoga or anything.
Yoga = the love of my life. So the problem is not that I don’t like Hatha yoga and all yoga. It’s that I love it way too much.
Having taught for years while studying with the best minds in the field has made it extremely tricky to find a good fit. It’s better for me to stick to my own practice.
My commitment.
To hold off on this while I’m in my hormonal funk of hating everything.
To make room for the possibility that there is something I might like. And if there isn’t, to use my vast experience of teaching and doing teacher trainings to invent something.
To do some tramping while I figure this out.
Thing 3: patterns.
Here’s what I want:
Working on two, old, stuckified patterns that keep coming up. Possibly (probably) related.
Needing some help and focus with this.
Ways this could work:
I can dance on it some more, and use Shiva Nata to zap my brain and generate some epiphanies.
Writing. Lots of writing.
Talking to some monsters.
My commitment.
Patience.
Love.
Sweetness.
Curiosity.
Balls.
Thing 4: Rallions!
Here’s what I want:
Two more lovely people to decide they’re coming to Rally (Rally!) with us on the 11th.
Ideally these two people will do this before Toozday, because I’m pretty sure that’s when the early brunch price ends. And because if you’re flying (we have people coming from Texas, New Mexico, Colorado and Washington), you want to book flights.
Ways this could work:
I can remember to tell you guys about it.
We could put up the rest of the new copy.
My commitment.
To madly adore everyone coming and buy them presents. Rally!
Progress report on past Very Personal Ads.
Just to update you on what’s happened since last time.
Let’s see. I wanted an organization to take our refrigerator, and while the refrigerator is still with us, I got three excellent suggestions for good places. Now I just need to call them.
(Next VPA: progress on the phone phobia!)
Then I asked for projectizing progress. And that definitely happened. Thank goodness for the Playground. It is the best place in the entire world for getting stuff done. Magical.
And I wanted more time with my body, and yes. More to do there, but feeling good about this. Then there was another Rally-related ask, and we have some absolutely amazing people coming so I’m excited.
I love that we do this. Seriously, this ritual has turned into my favorite part of the week.
Comment zen. Here’s what I’d love today.
- Your own personal ads, small or large. Things you’ve asked for. Or are asking for. Or would like to ask for. Or updates on last time!
What I’d rather not have:
- The word “manifest”.
- To be told how I should be asking for things.
- To be judged, psychoanalyzed or given advices.
Wishing love and good things for your Very Personal Ads! So glad for everyone doing this with me.
Follow
You might check out Nia? I’m not sure if the name is ridiculous, but I think it counts as aerobic, it’s dance-y sort of stuff but is very don’t-push-yourself-y and I’ve heard great things about it (though never done it myself).
Last week’s ad, I asked for destuckification on creative stuff (IIRC). Which worked fabulously, I’m feeling in a much better place today creatively and spiritually and all-around-y.
So what I want to get done this week is…writing! and art! and meditation.
Ways this can happen:
I think now that I’m unstuck, it will be pretty easy. I mostly just need to make space for ideas and carrying them out. So I’m committing to making space for new things and making time to do them, this week. I’m pretty excited about it.
Good luck to you, Havi, and to everyone else!
.-= Michelle´s last post … A Traveller’s Tale =-.
Thing 1: to keep up the good work on my year’s studio documentation
Here’s what I want: to have fun, to write good notes on my research
Ways this could work: daily shiva nata, regular bikram, eating well, regular studio and documenting time
My commitment: to remember that this is exactly my favourite thing to do!
I love Nia! It’s very fun and loose enough to do a liitle of your own thing:)
on Thing 2 – Nia is a natural for you, and you live in the town where the founders teach it!! 910 SW Yamhill Street, top floor, gorgeous space. It’s all about the joy of movement. Try a few classes and see how your body likes it. Mine finds it delicious! (and I hate aerobic-y stuff)
I would always recommend swimming to a Pisces. That’s what I do every day. But recreational swimming not the push-push kind. And I don’t have patience for people telling me how to do it, I do it the way I am enjoying it. 🙂
The VPAs are the favourite part of my week too ^_^
Thank you Havi for starting the tradition 🙂
I’ve never thought of VPAing for abstract/mental things, like patterns [but silly since I’ve been joining in with the VPA comments for like.. 6 months.]
And that’s what I’m asking for this week.
Thing 1: pattern insight.
Here’s what I want:
I’ve got an old pattern that keeps rearing its head. I want to know why; what’s it trying to tell me and how I can communicate with it.
It scares me, so I need to find.. a safe space to work on it. And I need systems in place – tea, biscuits, an unbreakable glass partition that can be raised or lowered between us if necessary. I’m truly scared of what this pattern brings up; but I feel capable of gaining insight to it now.
Yet I want to fight it.
Ways this could work:
Dance on it.
Meditate.
Grab a pen and paper and ask for it to speak.
Drink lots of tea.
Maybe bring in a mediator.
My commitment.
To be curious, patient and open.
To send out metta [compassion] if I can’t love it for being a part of me.
Thing 2: time, space and flow.
Here’s what I want:
I want time and space to do the above. Yet, University starts this week. I need to do masses of reading, arrange meetings with dissertation tutor, attend 9am lectures, volunteer [6 hour a week placement], run 2 societies, attend 2 societies, free time and coursework.
Again, I’m terrified. I’m used to [and tired of] being anxious 24/7 – but this is fear and I don’t like it.
I have free time, but I’m always exhausted. I eat fruit, veg, iron tablets, sleep… it’s just the mental strain.
Ways this could work:
Make a promise to dance daily?
Meditate.
Create a relationship with my degree in general?
Drink lots of tea.
Create a mental safe space? With cushions, protective bubbles, apple juice and books.
My commitment.
To be kind to myself.
To do all I can to get enough sleep, give myself time between tasks and to avoid activities where I may overwhelm myself.
.-= Rose´s last post … October =-.
Last week I didn’t write the ask, but the unspoken ask was for a good meeting with my art group on Monday. It went very well and it was almost like old times with them. But better in some ways because we’ve all grown together.
This week I am writing:
What I want: to easily find the photos I need to fill in the rest of my presentation for Thursday.
How this can happen: I can spend the day in the studio. I can take coffee with me and play my favorite Beatles music to keep me calm and focused.
My commitment: to be flexible and not freak out if they aren’t found. To be calm in the looking. To pause and breathe and do some Shiva Nata if I feel panic starting.
What I want: to be calm and relaxed and give a good presentation on Thursday, without too many “ums”. To be able to project and be heard. To not lose my voice (this is a true possibility, with all the allergens around combined with my bad vocal cord, too much talking can = no more talking)
How this can happen: I can remember that most of the people in the (very small) audience are friends, and that everyone there is there because they want to know more about why I do what I love. I can have everything written on index cards so as to minimize the “ums”. I can wear stripey socks under my slacks for secret super powers. I can avoid too much sugar this week and drink some kombucha to keep the voice thing at bay. I can do Shiva Nata in my head if I start to freak out. I can do the talk without my glasses so that everyone’s face is fuzzy and I don’t freak out at nuances of facial expressions. I can remember that it is only 30-45 minutes and my mom’s favorite saying “This time tomorrow it will all be over”. Oh, and to bring at least one bottle of water or maybe warm beverage to help with the voice thing.
My commitment: to be enthusiastic and let my love for the work shine through. To realize that it is ok to be the center of attention for a while. To listen and repeat any questions I get to make sure I understand them and to give thoughtful answers. To remember that not everyone works from the same base of knowledge and experience that I do.
.-= Andi´s last post … The Sketchbook Project- Week Two =-.
havi i want to share the dance workshops i go to. these are called “dance your prayers” but i have seen similar things with different names.
it starts as a meditation and then moves into dance. it gets ridiculously silly. like running around the room pretending to be a bumper car, making “vrooommm vroooom” noises and holding our hands out on pretend steering wheels and driving into each other. being baby birds hatching and then flying around the room.
i always leave there feeling so amazing.
and mine….
Here’s what I want:
to make the most of the Big Change coming to my schedule tomorrow, to add new routines in that bring in mindfulness and enjoyment to all parts of my days. to be organised with it all.
Ways this could work:
i’ve already bought healthy groceries and done laundry and organised my house. i’m starting from a good place.
today i can create a list of routines and rituals i’d like to add into my new schedule and experiment and play and see how it all fits.
i can relax about it and trust myself to find my way.
i can give myself some time and not expect it to all be perfect right away.
My commitment.
to stay with the process.
.-= andrea´s last post … creating dreams come true opening up the flow =-.
Whaa, I wish I could go to the Rally! It sounds like so much fun!
Very Personal Ad #6
Update on last week!:
Thing 1 was healing. The pain finally – (insert your own heart-felt sobbing here) – finally receded. Of course, I had to give up my first love (writing) in order to make that happen. But it strangely took a lot of stress and weight with it. I mean, I’m writing just as much incidentally now as I was “seriously”, only, with less pain. That brings up the idea that perhaps writing was not the right fit for me after all, and with what I’m discovering recently, I might have to agree. More on that in a minute.
Thing 2 was courage, and oh, I got that. I was able to do things this week that I never thought possible. And while confidence is in short supply right now, conviction to see it through to the end is not. I’m determined to follow this path and see where it goes, and I think – in that fuzzy, artist, creationy way – that it will be somewhere wonderful.
So, this week!
Thing 1: More courage
What I would like: There is a lot of new territory opening up before me, and a whole lot of changes and adjustments being made. I would like to have the will and fortitude to keep facing them without retreating, to look at them without flinching, and to make my decisions about them with an open mind and heart.
How this could happen: Therapy!
Leaning on my best friend (who’s going through a lot of similar things) for support.
Exploring around and finding new techniques for dealing with this stuff.
Enroll in classes.
Find a community for these things.
My commitment: To sleep in.
To not beat myself up over taking care of myself.
To not feel weak for needing more than most right now.
To do the therapy necessary.
Thing 2: Patience
What I would like: Help recovering from my own silliness, depression, and torpor.
Ways this could happen: Take it easy on my body.
Eat less sugar.
Drink less chai.
Take Epsom salt baths.
Go for the damn hike only when I’m feeling up to it. (And sitting on my butt when I’m not.)
My commitment: To do those things.
To not beat myself over them.
Therapy for the stuck.
Thing 3: Confidence and persistence and love
What I would like: I am embarking on a path that is radically different from the way I’ve lived my life thus far. That said, I have almost none of the skills I need to live and thrive in it. But I do have a good head on my shoulders and the ability to use it. The problem with that is… it gets the demons involved. So! I need the confidence to know that I will acquire the skills I need as I go, persistence to not stop when those skills seem to come once a month, and the love to keep myself and it going in that interminable period between thought and reality.
Ways this could happen: Therapy! ^^
Talking to supportive people.
Not keeping it all inside.
Resting a lot.
Buy myself little, helpful things as rewards for trying so hard.
My commitment: To do those things.
In a bit of a hurry because I’ve got a workshop to prepare for this afternoon, but perhaps belly dancing?
.-= Kat´s last post … Treating the Massage Student’s Most Prevelant Injury =-.
I don’t think this is possible, but I want to find the thing I lost. I’ve tried everything else I can think of. It’s a real physical thing and the losing of it is really not okay for many reasons.
My commitment – to keep checking even places that seem unlikely and inquiring even with people who are likely to be uncooperative.
To devote some real thought and maybe a little Shiva Nata time to why it seems like things are getting lost so often lately.
And if I can’t find it, to figure out a solution that doesn’t require a lot of money or embarrassment or hassle. Sigh.
Lots of non-cloying empathy to you, Havi, on the hormonal hating.
.-= Sandra´s last post … Lost and found =-.
Thing 1: Physical Strength
To do a half hour’s worth of physical training every day so I can create a strong body capable of doing the physical feats that my growing business requires.
Ways This Could Work
Admitting to myself that I spend a little too much time puttering on the computer. Less time on the computer (this site being an exception of course 😉 will equal more time to do yoga and drills. A daily serving of push ups and sit ups will also help immensely.
My Commitment
After my daily Shiva Nata, I will immediately kick on some music and dance my ass off and/or throw in one of my (many) drilling DVDs and work out to that until it’s time to start my day.
Thing 2: Daily Writing Practice
I want to get back on track honing and refining my writing skills. I want to write for my blog as well as get back to work on my novel, or whatever fiction work may strike my fancy.
Ways This Could Work
I can plan to write during the short breaks I receive during the days. The time in between classes or before I go to work. I need to allow myself the freedom to write wherever I am.
My Commitment
To encourage my fuzzy monsters to back down and not stop me in their warped attempt to protect the Good Ship Kaleena. To allow myself to be awkward and not the most elegant writer to have lived. To simply take comfort in practice and to know that skill will come in time. To trust that I AM a writer.
.-= Kaleena´s last post … Rabbiting =-.
Hmm…I have a feeling I might need more than 3 hours sleep for my brain to function fully, let’s hope these VPAs make sense. I had two last week that I don’t think I wrote on here – one of them, for flow with my writing, worked awesomely, the other one, finding a new job – not going so well, so might break it down a bit more.
This week I am Asky McAsky.
Thing the first: make new friends. Ok, a fairly amorphous ask. I’ve realised that because I like being alone I’ve easily got into the habit of spending stupid amounts of time without socialising, or only seeing one or two people. I want to make new friends, on the Sussex coast, who are interested in stuff I am (particularly writing, arty type stuff, fetish/sm scene (ha! I’m not sure if I’m allowed to admit to liking that sort of thing) and apparently excessive use of brackets).
HOw this could happen:
– have a look online for groups
and I just managed to post that accidentally…see the 3 hrs sleep!
anyway
– actually going to said groups
– burlesque classes
– randomness
My commitment:
– not to overload myself
– or try and be someone I’m not
– mind open
Thing the second: I need to work out what I need to do in the next four weeks to get my course portfolio submitted.
How this could work:
-make a list and plan it out
– engage with either no time monster should he appear
My commitment:
– to be kind to myself
– to remember that taking time to plan is not being lazy
Thing the third: Asking my course tutors for help with the whole work thing.
How this could happen:
– remember that nothing will happen unless I make the first move
– look at why I’m not making that first move
– be clear about what I want and what I need
My commitment:
-be honest
– be clear
– monsterology when necessary
– remember I have more than a year until I finish the course – there’s time to take a deep breath
Ooo, I actually feel better already just for writing this out. Yay!
.-= Jane´s last post … Eating- mindfully =-.
Update on last week’s VPA: I asked for a place and I found one that fulfils almost all the criteria I had asked for. And those it doesn’t fulfil I can live with, such as not being able to walk to work but still living reasonably close to the theatre. Sigh of relief!
This week’s VPA:
I am asking not to get a cold, cough, flu. It is going around and I am not a 100% ok, I can feel it in my throat and I am coughing a bit. Also I think that the last weeks with the new job, long hours at work, looking for a place etc. are taking their toll a bit. I am asking for the signs of the cold to disappear and I am asking for energy for this week and for finding my way into a new routine (in a positive way) now that I finally have a home in my temporary city.
How this can work:
Sufficient sleep, warmth (hello, dear hot water bottle!), Schuessler salts, healthy food.
My committment:
Listening to my need for slowing down a bit. Tomorrow should be a fairly quiet day at work; I will do things slowly, bit by bit and will go home early and set the tone I need for the week.
My first VPA! Been lurking forever and wanting to join in. So here I am.
Thing 1: More Self-Trust
Here’s What I Want: I’m ready to practice and play with the idea of self-trust and sovereignty. Normally, the amount of trust I place in myself is equivalent to the amount I’d have for a dim-witted, grubby-fingered hobo. So I’d like to work on changing that. There’s really no reason I should trust myself less than I trust my husband, my friends, or my colleagues. I think I’ve taken the first step by simply being aware and noticing, “Oh yeah, this is a thing I do.” So now I’d like to bring more awareness and more curiosity to this pattern.
Ways This Could Work: Lab notes! I have a big, beautiful green notebook primed and ready to go. I will look for clues and take notes and say “Hmm, very very interesting.” I’m also open to magic fairy dust. Or, meeting a new friend who wants to experiment and play with self-trust and sovereignty too.
My Commitment: I will try very hard not to be too SERIOUS, which is unbearably difficult for practical sorts like myself. I will remember that I’m supposed to be researching, observing, and noting, not judging.
What I want #1: To come out of this week with The Vision and The Plan.
Oh, man. Do I ever know the thing about looking for a body practice.
I was fortunate in that Nei Kung kept getting nudged in front of me until I paid attention. I hope your thing does that for you: just starts showing up in your field of vision. Maybe it could hold up one of those signs like the limo drivers at the airport baggage pickup.
Ways this might work: It turns out that The Vision and The Plan was already forming itself under the surface, and all I have to do is pop it, like a zit. Or…? I don’t know. This many years without a plan, it’s just weird.
My commitment: Sitting down with Wishcraft. Looking for ways to make it more fun than painful. Nei Kung. Walks. Leaving it. Sleeping enough. Maybe even earlier bedtimes? Being open to signs and signals.
What I want #2: Again facing lots of writing due, coinciding with lots of driving. They’d seem to be at odds, and I want them not to be.
Ways this might work: They magically come together while I’m sleeping? I sweat less, flow more? I don’t know. The more I know, the more I know how little I know.
My commitment: Sitting down to daily writing. Using Hiro techniques to keep me mindful of surf-slipping on the internets. Going through the fretting into whatever is behind it, on the other side.
UPDATE (on VPA #63): All went well. I did my job, and the universe did its job. Love it when it works like that.
.-= the communicatrix´s last post … Selling My Crap on eBay- Day 14- Infinite Elsa =-.
Update from last week: I may be starting the trip later than expected, so the letting go of the timeline has commenced. I’m okay with it so far, and I have options for doing ‘things I want to do’ even if they’re not in the places I originally thought. I emailed the consignment shop again and still haven’t heard back. Also, talked to my dad and got credits on my phone. Next week, steps two and three.
This week:
Thing I want:
I have a relationship pattern that I’ve been aware of for a while and I finally feel like I *need* to work through it. I’ve been shivanating it up and the time has come to tweak my life on this one. I’m in the tail end of this particular cycle, and I need to figure out what my nexts are.
Ways this could work:
I could talk to the monsters that want to keep me safe in this pattern.
I could dance more shivanata on this one too.
My commitments:
To take classes in stuff I’m interested in in order to meet a wider variety of people.
To meet people through the coffee section of couchsurfing.com.
To pay attention to my reactions and what I need in each situation.
.-= Kathryn´s last post … You want me to talk about me =-.
So, last week I asked for gentleness, patience and committed to scheduling huge gaps of nothing into my week. Fortuitous… as last week was… hellish. Right there with you in the hormone storm, Havi. Sending you comfort. It sucks.
While in the midst of a hormonally-inspired migraine, I caught a glimpse of another piece of the underlying emotional component of this pattern.
Therefore, this week’s ask: for further untangling, clarity, guidance, support and illumination of this piece. This piece of the pattern feels huge and has little fingers of pain digging into so many aspects of my life.
My commitments:
The usual suspects:
-Shiva Nata
-long walks
-writing, writing, writing
-spending more time in nature, just sitting and tuning into my senses.
-more quiet time in the evenings.
Love to all.
.-= Larisa´s last post … Using Your Senses to Relax Your Body =-.
Hello Havi, Selma and every one else.
What I want:
Today I am sitting and thinking that I would like more sovereignty and self trust. After doing lots of Shivanata, thinking about thing, not thinking about things and walking in the rain being connected with the world through my skin I would really really like self trust and sovereignty.
Ways this might work:
To be appreciative of where I am right now and what I am doing (on exchange during my last semester just cos)
To talk with my Wants-No-Feedback Llama (its a very grumpy llama that does not like any type of feedback at all good or bad)
To do my University work and remember that even when I do barely enough I still pass, so it is ok to do more.
To nurture my shiny little idea that needs oh so much academic work done on it.
Dance the dance, go for walks, talk with the people, the awesome every so caring people.
My commitment:
Dance the dance.
Walk and enjoy it.
Listen to Music.
Breath, breath deeply, just breath.
Ask Questions, at Uni, about Llamas, with friends, about what I am feeling.
Write do observations in the book of me and the note pad of science and plots! There may or may not be evil laughter at this point…
To check back in next week.
And love stuff, me, you the baby octopus on my head and also things.
Thing #1: My five-year floor plan.
Here’s what I want:
Time, peace, and clarity as I spend some time this week developing the first life plan I’ve made since before we moved to West Virginia four years ago.
How this could work:
I can bring this theme to my morning pages and to my Shiva Nata practice. I can also claim little pockets of time to play with the plan whenever inspiration strikes.
My commitment:
To be gentle, and playful, and kind to myself.
Thing #2: My dissertation proposal.
Here’s what I want:
Progress. Palpable progress. Pleasure, too. I want to give this task more of my time and energy, but I want to find ways to do this without feeling depleted or deprived.
How this can happen:
If I knew the answer to that…
Well, let’s see. Baby steps. Fifteen-minute portions of work, to start with. Also, I can make a point of talking about the project with a few trusted people, to make it feel less lonely.
My commitment:
I will give at least a little time to this project every day for the next seven days.
Thing #3: Family vacation.
Here’s what I want: We’re taking a trip to Colonial Williamsburg next weekend. I want it to be a good time for all of us.
How this can happen:
Hmm. This is tricky, because I can’t really control the experiences or reactions of others, nor would it be advisable for me to try.
I can practice extreme self-care. I can give love and compassion to each of the other three people involved.
My commitment:
To be flexible. To go with the flow. To take things in with a curious, playful, open mind, with as little attachment to specific outcomes as I can reasonably manage.
.-= Kathleen Avins´s last post … RE-re-invention =-.
Last week what I wanted most was for my brain to stop being mental (otherwise known as having massive anxiety.)
My book on how to do that has been misplaced in the move, and I couldn’t remember what it said, but then I remembered that I had the CD part to listen to.
I listened to one meditation about making room for the thoughts, feelings and physical sensations and welcoming them in as part of my whole experience and as soon as I just made room for it, it was gone. Or it was there, but since I’d made room for it it wasn’t smooshing up against me making it hard to breathe.
So, this week I’m placing a personal ad that gives thanks to the Messrs. Forsythe and Eifert for writing the book that saves my life time and again.
Havi: Nia has been lovely and life-changing for me. I enjoy it because it let’s me come as I am, and there’s lots of room to do my own thing. In Portland, I love Saffire Bouchelion’s Nia classes because they’re intimate and amazing. Classes at the Nia Headquarters are a little big and bright for me right now.
Hello All!
Here’s what I want:
A new home. Before we get contracted into this very difficult one for another term (that means REALLY SOON!) A place where I, my Sweetie and our animal babies feel safe, happy, healthy, nourished, spacious, relaxed and un-constricted. Great light, easy commutes (NJ near GWB) & parking, quiet, safe/fenced yard, no allergans (ie, carpet, chemicals, mold, neighbors’ laundry-product-poison-gas), clean & dry room for all our living/creating/storage/dreaming/loving/cooking/playing/evolving. Cats, dogs, drums, wool, books, bikes and HSPs welcome. Affordable.
Ways this could work:
Officially being open to this after much heart-and-mind wrenching, I could happen upon the right place in an ad or by word-of-mouth or a drive-by.
A friend or acquaintance could contact me about the perfect house-sitting or rental.
Current landlord could be completely flexible, supportive and grateful for all we have put up with, giving us all the time we need to find the new place.
A home could drop out of the sky in the exact right spot, killing no one in the process and maybe still providing Wonderful Magic Shoes.
Any kind of miracle could occur to produce/unveil The New Home.
My commitment:
To keep my eyes, mind, heart, etc open.
To not give up.
To love the New Home utterly and fill it with Magic & Creating and beautiful Energy.
To radiate gratitude.
To believe. Again.
If you’re looking for more time in your body more than you’re looking for a workout, please take a look at Aikido. I know, it’s a martial art, but it’s the only martial art in which protecting your attacker is one of the central principles.
The goal of the Aikido student is to avoid conflict, but where conflict is unavoidable, we learn to blend with our attacker’s energy and redirect it to a place that is safe for everyone involved. It requires an astonishing amount of body awareness, so if that’s what you’re looking for, it’s right up your alley.
To illustrate its nonviolent nature, I’ll tell a story my uncle told me. He studied jujitsu for many years, and his sensei often brought in teachers from other arts to do demonstrations. When my uncle was a brown belt, three Aikido teachers came to his class. They were all small, slight, elderly men, and when, after a brief demo, they invited the senior students to attack them, my uncle and the other big, tough guys were amused.
They came at the old men gently, but none of them could lay a hand on the Aikido teachers. They started coming at them, full tilt, determined to knock them down, but each time the old men would lay them out gently on the mat. Although he didn’t study the art until many years later, my uncle was deeply impressed. When I left Karate because it was too violent, he suggested I try Aikido. That was 18 years ago, and I’ve been a student at my dojo ever since.
My dojo: http://aikifremont.com/
One dojo in Portland is in the same Aikido association mine is, and is likely to have a similar gentle style: http://www.budodojo.com/
Hi All.
I’m still working:
-through the issues from my stealth ask/Day Job issue – this one will come to a head soon and I need to be prepared. I’ve had LOTS of support. Thank you VPA’s.
-on my writing practice. its seems that it won’t look that way I thought it would. still sorting this out.
-on finding my Right People. going to an event tomorrow night. I’m committing to finding a balance between giving it a chance and forcing things that aren’t there.
No new asks this week. I think I have enough!
Still committed to dancing shiva on the issues. And staying open to possibilities. And to help where ever it comes from.
Good luck all- Hugs and best wishes.
Hullo, all. Wishing everyone good wishes and cooperative universes with their asks.
Here’s mine, for this week:
Thing 1: The grace and wit to deal appropriately with whatever weird and curvy shows up in my life this week. The weird I should be used to, but it still makes my stomach tighten up thanks to loud-lunged Worst Case Scenario Monster. The curveballs aren’t always duckable even when I anticipate them.
How this could work:
* self care, starting with enough sleep and lots of Israeli salads. I’m smarter and more stylin’ when I feel healthy and rested.
* metaphorical Big Hat. One with a brim wide and fearsome enough to deflect shoes.
Thing 2: art mojo needs room and time to do its thang
How:
* get serious about decluttering the study this week
* but not so serious that I get lost in decluttering instead of putting nib to paper
* finished draft of _one_ IOU by Thursday night would be awesome. I’m not necessarily going to decline any alternate plans for Thursday night, but I should consider making it a date with said IOU and sticking to it.
.-= Mechaieh´s last post … fountains =-.
I love this ritual. Thank you, Havi. I should be sleeping but I am VPAing. I actually turned on my computer just to do this. Yay for compelling ritual.
I always get to this point and can’t remember what my VPA was from last week. It had to do with my house. I had one nibble. Yay! Dear multiverse: still open to possibilities.
Also, had asked about Right People please. Have had some very interesting moments of being able to coach people and having them affirm clearly and loudly my call to coaching. So dear multiverse: I coach. I do it well. I help people rearrange their brains with less torture and more light bulbs.
This week:
VPA Thing One: I have marketing issues. I need help with marketing. I have learned the heck out of marketing, and I feel like I need something. I have invented the something in my head. Here it is: I need a marketing whiz to be my agent and work on commission. I will happily pay a percentage of every new client that comes through said marketer. Think artist agent where the art is coaching. Given the number of coaches out there for whom marketing is not their strength, I cannot believe someone isn’t already doing this. Market me effectively and you get paid. Get to know me first so you know that my stuff will sell.
Ways this could work: posted here. Posted on Craigslist. Keep telling people about it. Suddenly get brilliant at my own marketing.
My commitment:
posted here.
telling about it.
DM me on Twitter if you’re intrigued.
VPA number two: a body practice! Yes! I have pined for my old Tai Chi Chuan form for too long. No one here teaches it. I would love to meet my new practice in motion. Belly dancing is a possibility. I am open to other things.
ways this could work: I could look for classes.
I could offer reiki exchange or coaching exchange.
commitment: research on what I can do here.
VPA number three: many balls in the air.
goal: not dropping them.
ways this could work: be very careful
put something down
stop picking them up
Commitment: sprint to Friday, then make room.
uh oh, getting very sleepy. (See, this is what I get for staying up to do this!) Possible edits or addenda tomorrow.
.-= Leela´s last post … shame and silence are deadly =-.
A body-practice that I have found very helpful and fantastic: capoeira, a Brazilian martial-art-dance that involves improvisation, singing, percussion, and clapping (yay! clapping!!!). It has a cool name, a historical pedigree (or “an historical” if you prefer)/ancient practice, and a distinct culture and community.
cheers,
andrea
The search for a body practice really struck a chord with me, so I thought I’d share a couple of stories (they’re short, I promise) which seem to have the same moral.
I was inspired by capoeira and decided that I would give it a try. I found a class right near by with a great Brazilian teacher. And I loved it! It was challenging, sweaty, fun and our teacher made sure that we understood that it was play. Lots of laughter, music, joking around and play. But then he left and the people that took over turned it into a fighting practice. It was horrible. And all the love and fun and challenge that I had turned to dismay and I had to quit.
Many years ago I tried Tai Chi. Loved it! And I was incredibly good at it. After 5 months, my teacher and some of my classmates said that it had now come time to make a commitment to Tai Chi and I should practice every day and become a vegetarian. What? I didn’t (and don’t) understand why I couldn’t enjoy Tai Chi for the love of movement and why I have to behave as if I’ve joined a cult. So I quit.
I still love capoeira and Tai Chi. Really. Love, love, love them. But the teachers are what turned me away. Lesson for me: Must find right teacher.
And I keep looking….
(Interesting and unrelated epiphany just came to me from that little post. Fabulous!)
Have you considered climbing? Roped climbing might not work out because it involves working with someone else (which is cool but perhaps a bit limiting), but bouldering (where you don’t go high enough to need a rope, so you can do it on your own) might fit. I find it very body-aware, and quite a meditative experience. You can be push-push-push about it, but you don’t have to be; you can just do what you’re comfortable with. I find it very playful, as well: I go to my local indoor bouldering place at a time when it’s mostly empty, and do a lot of messing around on the wall and giggling to myself as well as climbing Actual Labelled Routes. I do find myself pushing myself sometimes (if I can just streeeeetch a little bit more I could make that hold!) but it’s my choice because I’m having fun & because (like Shiva Nata!) it’s more fun sometimes to go a little beyond what you’re strictly able to do right now 🙂 Even if you fall off! (onto a nice padded floor)
My VPA for this week: calm and patience to deal with all the things that are coming up in the next couple of weeks, and with the fact that I have basically no time off until the 22nd Oct.
How this might work:
– make time for some combination of morning pages, climbing, and Shiva Nata (i.e. all the things which either help me to calm my brain or give me a space in which I am not thinking about anything external to what I’m doing RIGHT NOW. Climbing is great for that 🙂 )
– be really clear about what I can & what I can’t do in the various projects I’m involved with. Set boundaries and tell people about them where appropriate.
– appreciate the people in at least some of my projects who understand about boundaries & appreciate people being clear on them 🙂
My commitment:
– to do at least one of climbing, morning pages, or Shiva Nata every morning (ideally, morning pages plus one of the others).
– to be gentle with myself.
– to take at least half an hour a day for relaxing on my own. Reading, watching trashy TV, a bath; whatever feels good.
.-= Juliet´s last post … Very late potato-planting =-.
Havi, I really enjoyed Geometry Pilates in the Pearl. The instructor there showed me some great modifications so that I could still do the exercises and get the core-strengthening part without my legs being all hurt-y. It was a beginner class, and I thought she was really great about meeting us where we were.
.-= Christina Gremore´s last post … There’s No ‘I’ in Team =-.
so i am going to put NIA as something to possibly maybe try. mainly because headquarters is in Portland and it is beautiful. (plus schmoppet can come and play air guitar)
NIA like dance of shiva is hard to explain, and may be hard to take and yet i always feel yummy and happy and girly and powerful after i actually manage to get my ass there
http://www.nianow.com/home
918 SW Yamhill Street
http://www.nianow.com/studio
see you on Monday and we can talk more if you wanna 😀 or maybe go dance at a class thursday after rally!RALLY!
xoxox
amy!
.-= amy goetz´s last post … ask the faeries part 1 =-.