I have been making a collection of results and side effects that often come from being on Rally (Rally!) and projectizing up a storm at the Playground.
This has been a very entertaining experiment, and works well with the Playground User Manual and the Re-Entry Survival Kit, two projects I will be using Rally to finish.
And then two Rallies ago, someone pointed out a thing I’d already been thinking but hadn’t wanted to say out loud because it sounds crazy and what if it’s only true in my head.
But apparently if you’ve been on Rally, you already know about this, because everyone there agreed:
People are WAY better looking at Rally. Everyone.
Everyone becomes more attractive at Rally.
I’m not entirely sure why this is.
At first I assumed it had to be the flattering lighting.
Or a combination of that and how we’re all way more relaxed and happy than usual.
But Rally-ites (Rallions?) were reporting that during and after Rally, other people were noticing. Outside people.
Casey said that people always ask her if she’s lost weight. And then she’s all Uh, no. I was at Rally…
And I always find that people on the street seem to be smiling at me more when it’s Rally. And yes, Portlanders are a smiley crowd. But it’s something else.
So I’ve been asking my fellow Rally mice what they’ve noticed and what’s up with that.
Everyone agrees that yes, it is definitely a thing, but why?!
Here’s what came up when we talked about.
I’m not sure that any one of these things can work as a theory, but together you get a sense of something.
The Playground glow.
“There’s a Playground glow!”
“I always feel more attractive here. Permission floods my body. There’s so much more permission in my life, and I can extend it to all of me. It means I’m much more at home in myself and comfortable in my body and in how I move.”
Freedom and autonomy too:
“It’s having all that freedom from care-taking: reduced anxiety about what other people are thinking or how they are reacting.”
“I think it’s the autonomy. You really are in charge of your own experience here, and your relationship with your project and your time and your space. There is so much power in that. I stand taller. I smile more…”
And the napping.
“Definitely all the napping. I nap like, at least twice a day when I’m on Rally, because it just feels so comfortable. And so I’m getting a lot done but also weirdly relaxed.”
Related to napping:
“Being in an environment of total non-judgment.”
“Play! Being around stuffed animals and hiding in blanket forts and wearing costumes and drawing with markers. It puts you back into that radiance of youth.”
Everyone agreed with this one:
“Yes! You’re shiny and happy because you’re sovereign — you don’t care what other people think. No one can tell you that you’re playing wrong. You know how to play!”
The comfortable-ness.
Like this:
“You get to see other people in their beauty and radiance, what they’re like when they’re comfortable being themselves, and then you love them even more.”
“It’s more comfortable to be around other people who are enjoying themselves.
And the thing that someone says at nearly ever single Rally:
“I’ve been more authentically myself over the past few days than ever in the rest of my life, since I was a little kid.”
It’s crazy. But in a good way. I am liking this crazy.
Right? Back me up if you’ve rallied or been to the Playground!
This is a thing. And it makes no sense, still. But it’s a thing.
Does it last?
I don’t know. You tell me. How long do we carry Rally glow with us?
And really, I am going to have to run some studies with people who have done multiple Rallies or other Playground events to see what their experience is like.
And an unlikely opportunity.
The next Rally starts the evening of Monday, March 14. That is in a week! A week!
We have arranged for Jillian, who is a terrific photographer and Friend of The Fluent Self to be there to do a no-cost blog headshot session with anyone at the Rally who wants one.
If you’re there, you can get a wonderful high-quality headshot photo of you to use on your blog, website, whatever, while you just happen to be looking your absolute most radiant and confident.
I’m getting one too, and I am so excited.
We’ve had bizarre turnover for this one — so if you want a Stowawayship scholarship, do that quickly. That is all.
Some translations, if you have no idea what I’m talking about:
The Playground is the the center I founded where we practice living the stuff that I write about here, and we destuckify and it’s very laid back and extremely fun.
A Rally is where we spend three and a half days making big, crazy progress on any project at all (an ebook? a product? an art project? a business idea? the Book of You?), in the most comfortable, supportive, magical environment imaginable.
With presents and snacks and star shows and other delightful-but-impossible-to-describe things.
And comment zen for today?
The usual stuff applies about giving everyone room to have their own experience.
If you’ve been on a Rally and have a theory about why we’re hotter there, or why it is so magical, or why its magic is so hard to explain, I’d love to hear it.
Or if you just want to say YAY RALLY.
Or if you want to build an imaginary blanket fort here. Because that’s always fun.
Kisses.
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It is absolutely 100% true that everyone just GLOWS from within. It’s most definitely the sovereignty thing — it is so rare to be in an environment where everyone truly has permission and freedom and calm and ease all at the same time. And you do carry it out with you into the world. It’s definitely changed me 🙂
I wish I wish I WISH the universe could somehow cancel all the other things I have to do next week, because then I could apply for the Stowawayship. But I’ll be there in spirit most definitely!
*FORT!* sooo tired. Need sleepytime blanket fortness.
Definitely agree. I know that I feel prettier while I’m there and all my body image stuff disappears. I do think it’s the permission thing. I have so much permission that I can extend that same permission to my body. 🙂
YAY Rally!
WHAA!! I wish there were a Rally-at-Home Kit! I would never stop being at Rally if there were! (Okay, I would, but I wouldn’t WANT to.) It sounds like so much fun!
YAY RALLY!
I want to rally! I need a super swift tunnel from the East Coast to the West (Best!) Coast so I can get my glow on & not take vacation days from work. 🙂
xoxo
YES YES YES. This thing! I know it! It happens!
I’ve never been to a Rally (Rally!) but I’ve been to other things that seem to have a similar flavor and which totally produce the same effect. Let me know if I’m way off base here.
The events:
2-7 days of total immersion in an environment which is isolated from your everyday life, where you can drop those masks and roles and responsibilities and suddenly have the freedom to just be yourself. In a group of people who are intentionally creating a micro-community dedicated to support, authenticity, relaxation, freedom, play, creativity, respect, truth, magic, possibility. There are no judges, but there are open-hearted witnesses. Your sovereignty and choices are not just given lip service but instead are given genuine respect and support. You get to see these awesome, amazing, brilliant, creative, zany, gorgeous people doing what they do best (their stuff in their way, even when it’s hard) and are free to like them and support them because you’re not in the normal world where you’re expected to be judgemental and “cool”. And as it turns out, they like and support you! And they think that you’re awesome, amazing, brilliant, creative, zany, gorgeous! And… maybe you are! And you’re doing great things with brilliance and ease. And you’re getting through points of stuck and hard you thought you’d never be strong enough to face. And everyone believes in you. And you see all these people worth believing in. And gradually, you forget all the times you’ve been told to be quiet, small, dumb, simple, so as not to intimidate others, and you start being your real self, the self that shines with ability and confidence. And the entire experience is like a constant energetic chorus singing “Yes!”
Heh. So, is a Rally a little like that?
And you walk out of there filled with rest, and enthusiasm, and love. You are not carrying around goatloads of guilt or shame or fear… instead you glow with quiet pride and courage and curiosity. You are filled with energy and can see so much beauty. You have a kind of primal innocence about you.
This energy and pride and ease and stuff… it makes you glow. It’s like a faery glamour from the old myths and legends. You attract everyone’s eyes, whether you’re walking down the street or entering a coffee shop. Everyone smiles at you. Children want to play with you, cats sit on you, dogs drag their owners over to you so they can lean against your leg, adults find you alluring and attractive. You feel like Cinderella when she first walks into the grand hall. Or like some kind of magnet. Or sex goddess.
I think a big part of it is letting go of a lot of shame and knowing, really knowing, that we are beautiful, powerful, passionate, brilliant beings — not in an arrogant better-than-you way, but in an honest acknowledgment of our own unique strengths and beauty.
There are so many ways we hide our light, so many ways we dim ourselves. Events like this remind us what it’s like to shine, what it can be like when it’s safe to shine as brightly as we dare, and allow us to do what we need to do to feed our inner fires.
@Jesse – oh! I also so so WISH you could be back at Rally. I miss you. Smooshy kisses from me and Scootch the soft hedgehog. Come ON, universe, rearrange her persnickety schedule!
@R – totally. FORTS FOR EVERYONE! And extra hammock-ing. Forts!
@Ren – me too me too me too
@Elizabeth – right? It’s like I forget about my body image stuff and the fact that I have it. So true.
@Jess – tunnel! Portal! We really need to work on that. Wormhole Project to commence immediately.
Also “get my glow on” is how I’m going to have to refer to Rally from now on.
@Carey – ohmygod. OHMYGOD. If I didn’t happen to know that you hadn’t been at Rally I would swear that you were there every time taking notes. That is the most perfect summing up of what it’s like.
The releasing of shame and the seeing of strengths and the weird cinderella sex goddess effect and the inner-fire-feeding. I cannot believe how marvelously you just described my experience. Next time I’m letting you write the post, because this was the most BRILLIANT channeling of the thing I was trying to say. Thank you!
Everyone totally looks better at Rally. I keep my orange mug on my desk all the time because it has magical Playground rays that make a mini-Rally in the living room.
I also think that all the orange has something to do with it. Orange!
I would like to have someone make a sleep tape of what Carey just wrote so I can wake up every morning feeling like I was at That Place in my dreams.
Was at Rally (Rally!) in Feb –
-someone at home asked me if “Rally” was code for “fat farm” and that it did me good. (er, um…nope…i’m still size 12, not 6, and haha! where in the world would the best pizza west of nyc + the best pie ever (PIE!) + constant snacking + Portland brews be part of a “fat farm”?)
-Huzzah to what Carey said. unbelievable freedom, support, respect creates an unbelievable, wonderful, comfortable inner calm, and inner calm seems to reflect on the outside.
While we’re talkin’ beauty – you see the photo of Selma’s human friend on this website? isn’t she gorgeous? well, that’s nothing compared to seeing her in person. I was blown away to see Havi in person, because she glows. Her beauty is stunning. When she closes her eyes and creates her force field…OMG…she radiates…some kind of amazing aura. I literally had to blink and think – is what I’m seeing real? I heard comments from other Rallions about the Beauty and Power Havi radiates when in a flailingFrenzy during teacher training, and I think it’s that radiance I saw. Now, I’m not tryin’ to suck up to Havi…just sayin’ – look at the person who’s been to ALL the Playground events. yep, I think there’s something to it.
Double-Dog YAY RALLY!
YAY RALLY (rally!)
*returns to blanket fort*
I’ve also never been to Rally, but I’ve also experienced something like this.
Every year my friends and I take over an old converted chapel for the weekend, and dress up and act out plays from Shakespeare. No audience, just ourselves, just playing. And everyone becomes beautiful there, and we all fall a little bit in love with each other for the duration. It’s totally a thing.
You (and the commenter mice too) have inspired me to want this glow year round, and see what I can do towards acquiring it…
I could understand this although I’ve never been at the Rally. And I guess it is precisely for all the reasons that you mention.
“It’s having all that freedom from care-taking: reduced anxiety about what other people are thinking or how they are reacting.”
I get the same effect from swimming. The best results are seen when on holidays at the seaside during summer. But even the sneaky dips in the swimming pool of the local gym during lunch time at the office work.
When Selma gets her headshot taken, I totally want her on my own orange mug so that I can have a bit of Rally (!) at my house.
Forts!!