Because it’s Friday AGAIN. And because traditions are important. In which I cover the good stuff and the hard stuff in my week, trying for the non-preachy, non-annoying side of self-reflection.
And you get to join in if you feel like it.
In any given week there are always a few things that fall into both the “hard” and the “good” categories at the same time.
This week it’s pretty much all of them.
I can embrace a good paradox as well as the next tree-hugging yoga teacher, but this is getting to be kind of absurd.
Oh well. It’s Friday. Let’s go.
The hard stuff
Retreating.
So as you know from last week, I went on retreat. For four days.
It was mostly fabulous but oh boy, there was plenty of hard.
Four whole days without a computer!
Four days. No internet.
Sure, I know some people take breaks from being plugged in. But only because I like to read about this phenomenon online.
And in theory I approve. But in reality?
Seriously, if you don’t count the two weeks that I was deathly ill in Berlin, it’s been about … oh, ten years since I spent that much time offline.*
It was actually much, much easier than I’d built it up to be but just the expectation of withdrawal pains was totally challenging.
*Don’t mock my addiction, please. It’s painful *and* it finances my entire life. So my terror — however unnecessary — makes perfect sense (to me, at least).
Four whole days without my gentleman friend.
Nooooooooooooo! Never doing that again. You heard it here first.
In fact, I just bought him a plane ticket to come with me to SXSW. He couldn’t care less about the conference so he’s basically going to be hanging out in Austin for the better part of a week.
But he’s coming with.*
* I feel like I need to add a “by George!” or something to that sentence, but can’t think of anything that works.
Carpal tunnel.
Ow, painful.
Ow, frustrating.
I have a ridiculously high number of things I want to say. Not being able to write them down is extremely annoying.
The good stuff
Carpal tunnel.
You would not believe how much I’m outsourcing. Stuff I should have handed off to a VA at least two years ago.
Yes, it’s annoying but it’s streamlining my business!
I’m making big, crazy changes in old systems. Big, crazy smart changes. And it’s opening up a lot of creative time for me.
To the point that I’m feeling really appreciative. And not in some phony, irritating, holier-than-thou “I appreciate hardships because they’re life lessons” sort of way.
Because that would be kind of obnoxious.
Just genuinely liking the fact that this uncomfortable situation was a big enough incentive to get me to make some hugely important changes in my business.
Four days without my gentleman friend.
No, I’m so not going to say that absence makes the heart grow fonder. This heart already is fonder.
Plus that’s a stupid thing to say.
This wasn’t really a good thing. But my understanding of just how much it’s not a good thing was really useful.
Knowing that it’s worthwhile for me to drag him along on trips and conferences arrange for him to go on holiday with me every once in a while … that’s useful too.
Four days without my computer.
This was incredible.
And that’s speaking as someone who regularly exhibits dangerous addict behavior with the internet.
Not having any idea what was happening in my email inbox was astonishingly fine. It helped that I knew Marissa was on top of things.
And she’s so great that when I came back there were only about four things she needed my input on as opposed to hundreds which would have been the case a few months ago.
Not being on Twitter was bizarre and challenging but not as excruciating as I’d built it up to be.
The elation I’m feeling is exactly the same flavor as when I realized I was finally a non-smoker. Or when I’d gone my first month without sugar (nine years ago, almost exactly) and knew I wasn’t going back.
Retreeeeeeeaaaaaaaaaaaat! Retreat.
Being on retreat was amazing.
Spending serious hours studying with the remarkable Paul Grilley (who is wise and patient and wonderful) … mindblowingly great.
Doing hours of yoga everyday … exactly what I needed.
Hanging out with Pace and Kyeli and their son and their cats … a treat.
Can’t wait to retreat again. I’m hoping soon.
Ez lives here! And I’m still talking about it!
It’s been a month since my kid brother moved in. And I could not be happier about it.
Having him around is so perfect. If only for the spit takes.
Also, this week we invented a new style of kung fu inspired by Bob Hope. That’s how much fun we have.
That’s it for me …
And yes yes yes, of course you can join in my Friday ritual right here in the comments bit if you feel like it.
Yeah? Anything hard and/or good happen in your week?
And, as always, have a glorrrrrrrrrrrrious weekend. And a happy week to come.
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I know how you feel about the internet. Scary though it is to admit!
The good
– Tons of work done on the website.
– Tons of stuck being worked through.
– Having the courage to make tough decisions in tight spots.
– Getting an email at 5am when I couldn’t sleep at all and it being just exactly what I needed to read.
The hard
– I realised I’m terrified of putting the website out and making it visible.
– Fears and stuff have been coming up really powerfully. Right now, every day is a roller coaster ride of emotional hugeness.
Overall
Step by step. The email unraveled me this morning but it was like being told by the universe that everything is OK.
Joely Blacks last blog post..TGIAD: The supposedly Latin edition
Breaks from the internet (days straight, not hours!) are a very good thing. The initial shakes and tremors subside after the first day.
The hard this week:
Breaking unproductive patterns.
Scattered negative thoughts.
Self doubt.
The good this week:
Attempting and sometimes succeeding in breaking unproductive patterns.
Focusing my business by making some hard decisions and following through.
Getting more work done this week than I have in the last four weeks.
Thanks for giving me a place to put all of that together! This “focus” thing is really working. Have a great weekend, Havi. 🙂
Sue
Sues last blog post..What is This Lifecoaching Thing Anyway? Or Is It Life Coaching?
Last year I spent 11 days in Costa Rica with no Internet access. Truthfully, the hotel for my three days in the capitol city had Internet, but I was determined not to go near it. I loved loved loved having that time away from it. One of these days, I’m determined to cut my usage down to less-than 1 hour per day.
Reading about your retreat and how much you enjoyed it makes me want to design a mini-retreat for myself this weekend!
During the holiday season, I went offline for several days. I literally put my laptop in storage (in a trunk, at the very back of my closet). It was so liberating! Scary too; all the “What ifs?” came out in full force, but they were mostly ignored as I was too busy drawing, reading and taking naps…
This week was a very mixed bag of emotions:
Not so good… :
– Difficult, awkward phone conversation with my mother
– Nagging feeling that I am not focusing on the right things and that I am missing something, but what?
– Hand and wrist pain
Downright great! :
– Spotting and getting to know several patterns that have been holding me back
– Seeing opportunities in times when others are tempted to give up
– Wonderful, helpful, caring friends
Have a great weekend everyone!
Using the hard to recognize the good – yay! That’s way fun.
I’ve got and combination hard-and-good for this week: I started blogging, at last! And this is one of the blogs that your encouragement and midwifery helped bring into reality. So THANK YOU!
And welcome back. We missed you!
Grace Judsons last blog post..Corporate politics and sex
The very hard thing was posting a poem for critique on a very serious poetry forum…and receiving said crits. Hard to read the feedback and realize how much improvement is needed from me.
The good thing: when there’s so much room for improvement, there’s that much room for growth, right? I’ll just keep telling myself that.
This week was fantastic! I had to think for a long time to come up with hard – so here it is:
* One of my 7-year-olds came down with pick eye so he missed school. He. Hates. His. Eyedrops.
Now for the good stuff:
* Yeah! I posted my first blog post…and my second! Shazam! My techie type is still tweeking the front end while I’m adding meat to the back. Almost there!
* I did all the laundry on the day my little one was sick! OK, not that impressive until I say I’m in the midwest and it is to be, how do you put it Havi, glorrrrious on Saturday; hence, I WILL NOT be doing laundry but enjoying the weather instead!
* Oh, and I finished SEO Ninja so I can finally start kicking some butt with SEO on my website/blog!
Hey folks, amaze yourself the weekend, ok!?
I know I always say that. It’s just that I’m so overjoyed to come back and find you guys here. Love when you share your hard/good here.
@Sundie & Grace – Both of you? Started blogging this week? WOW. I could not be more excited. More good stuff to read!
This is absolutely FANTASTIC. Right on!
I am feeling completely inspired. Yay.
The best line of the ‘net:
“Sure, I know some people take breaks from being plugged in. But only because I like to read about this phenomenon online.”
And I don’t mean paradoxically ~ ! Swell writing for an addict in pain, we appreciate it!
Vagina Monologues. Been practising for six weeks, it’s my first big show role ever, and – to quote another character – “I’m scared and I can’t wait”. I play a dominatrix and I go through a list of 20 moans/orgasms at the end. Talk about challenging!
The show went AWESOME!!!!! People loved it, we sold out, and I ROCKED my skit. Our other cast members did great too. Passion and power and energy and all that jazz. They are all great women – friendly, kind, honest, supportive. None of the back-stabbing bitchiness or outsider cliques that were so common with other groups. I love it so much.
Hard, but great. totally great. I’d do it again in a heartbeat.
Tiaras last blog post..The New Liberal Arts
Wow, I made it to two days without a computer once. My husband says I’m addicted but I don’t believe that. No, I’m not.
I had a big smile when you mentioned four days without your gentleman friend. My hubby has just returned from three months in the Middle East. He’s home for twelve days and then goes back for three months. It’s horrible. So I can’ totally empathise with you being without the love of your life for four days. Good on you for taking him with you next time! What a great solution!
And while I’m here, thanks for your series on blogging. The biggest thing I’ve gotten out of it so far, is that “I’m fine to just be me” and that’s going to attract my right people. Thanks so much! (((((hugs)))))
Melindas last blog post..How Will I Feel When “xyz” is No Longer a Problem?
I don’t think I could go very long without Internet access. It’s kind of like oxygen. And caffeine. Or caffeinated oxygen. Necessary stuff of life.
The hard:
– Tying up all kinds of loose ends left over from the past two months when I was so busy that I didn’t have time to breathe. My to-do list this week was a page long!
– Realizing that I *don’t* have a day this week to spend in the studio to work out some of the designs that are swirling around in my head. The thought of that studio day has been holding me together for the past few weeks.
The good:
– Finally clearing two big projects off my desk and making a serious dent in that to-do list.
– Getting to spend time with my nine-year-old niece (aka Mini Me) yesterday and today.
– A really, seriously good dinner out last night: stuffed cabbage and pierogi at the Polish comfort food place with a bunch of friends for our “ethnic eats” night.
Worth checking out these options/solutions for dealing with carpal tunnel:
http://johnaugust.com/archives/2004/my-new-keyboard-setup