Because it’s Friday AGAIN. And because traditions are important. In which I cover the good stuff and the hard stuff in my week, trying for the non-preachy, non-annoying side of self-reflection.
And you get to join in if you feel like it.
Friday! Again!
Man, I am so ready to crash. Except that I have to make it through Roller Derby Finals. Watching them, I mean.
Yes, most exhausting spectator sport ever.
Anyway, here we are. The week that was.
The hard stuff
Afternoon at the dentist! Ayeeeee.
Ow.
Hard and painful and hurt-ey and expensive and stressful and uncomfortable.
Do. Not. Like.
Not being able to recover from the afternoon at the dentist.
So I don’t know if it was the anaesthesia (grrrrr, dreaded diphth*ng).
Or maybe HSPs (Highly Sensitive People) react weirdly to x-rays. I don’t know.
Or maybe it was just getting all shaken up and having my stuff come up.
But this week I was not myself.
Like, it threw me off of ME. And then I didn’t sound like myself all week and wrote posts that were very not-like-me and it was weird.
And I felt just kind of off. As in, off-balance. But also off like when food is off. Yuck.
Plus, all the things that normally bring me back to myself like Shiva-ing it up or meditating or yoga were just not acting like themselves either.
And there’s more dentist coming up, so now I’m worried about that too.
We got destroyed at Derby.
Watched my roller girls (the Guns N Rollers) give up a forty-point lead … to lose by eighty three points.
To the Betties.
In the semis.
Agony.
I had been thinking a lot about having Shiva Nata sponsor them next year. But now I’m totally doing it.
So I guess that brings us to the good stuff.
Because yeah! Shivanauts doing Derby!
The good stuff
Whoah. I’ve been doing this for a year.
So the one-year anniversary of this blog happened Tuesday and I totally missed it.
Because I have no sense of time going to the dentist made me loopy.
So I’m celebrating now. Mostly by rereading the first post and shaking my head.
Given that I was hoping I’d last more than a month, I’m willing to go out on a limb and call it a raging success.
Also, it made me and my duck internet famous. And we got to meet a lot of fabulous people.
And what the hell, I have fun doing it. Especially on Fridays.
Speaking of which, yay, Friday Chickens. Which, you’ll note, we’ve almost done a year of as well. Crazy.
A neat present.
So one of my clients from a while back is on a gratitude run.
Which is awesome because gratitude does all sorts of nifty things even when you don’t feel like it.
But also because it means I get presents.
She sent me an enormous box full of little wrapped gifts that have instructions about which date I’m supposed to open them on.
And each one is a thank you for something, but the sweetest part is that each one acknowledges a quality that I myself don’t appreciate enough.
Like, “I know you really like elegant solutions to things so …”
And I think, wow. How does she know that?
Very cool.
I did a thing that scared me.
I don’t want to talk about it but I’m really proud of myself.
Fresh homemade pita bread!
My gentleman friend is unbelievable.
Seriously.
Yum.
I have never, ever had someone make pitot for me before. It was weird and cool and sweet and they were fantastic.
Also, he found blueberries growing in the back yard. In addition to last week’s surprise strawberries.
I’m telling you, Hoppy House is a dream come true. It’s everything I asked for plus a bunch of wondrous surprises.
And … STUISMS of the week.
Stu is my paranoid McCarthy-ist voice-to-text software who delights in torturing me misunderstanding me. I can’t stand him.
My favorite this week was the ten times I tried to get him to say “just so you know”, which is something I say all the time.
But no. Stu was all, “just say no” and “I’m just eating out” and stuff. Stu!
*shakes fist*
Anyway, here are the rest of the gems from the week, including his random capitalizations and occasional acetyl Freudian slips.
- the absolved Romantic instead of “the Dissolve-o-Matic“
- gun outfit gleaned instead of “an outfit cleaned”
- tell Meany about him instead of “tell me about it”
- little Pokey Blitz instead of “little poky bits”
- The bear needs to detect the rows instead of “the barrier needs to protect the rose”
- and Tredegar instead of “entered the earth”
- Or press a ball instead of “irrepressible” (and his second guess for that was “her arsenal”. What?!)
That’s it for me …
And yes yes yes, of course you can join in my Friday ritual right here in the comments bit if you feel like it.
Yeah? Anything hard and/or good happen in your week?
And, as always, have a glorrrrrrrrrrrrious weekend. And a happy week to come.
Follow
First comment, weird. Here it’s a lazy afternoon and there it’s all early and stuff… but, moving on.
I hate going to the dentist too and that is an understatement. And it’s interesting that you mention gratitude because my next post will probably be on that topic or more specifically on how to detach gratitude from obligation.
Friday Chicken!
The Good Stuff
-I wrote two poems, in the same week, amazing!
-I’m in Denmark and hanging out with my S.O., more amazing still!
-Discovered cucumber water and have been well hydrated ever since.
-Am reconnecting with my love of photography.
-One of my best friend’s from high school who vanished from my life reappeared on facebook eager to reconnect.
The Hard Stuff
-Still healing from last week’s painful family stuff. -Having some nasty anxiety issues and I’m wearing all my triggers on my sleeve.
-S.O. has been taking finals so there’s been a lot of free time and I’ve been putting a lot of pressure on myself to make the most of it.
Have a nice weekend, Havi. Thanks for your kind words yesterday.
Keely H.s last blog post..Submission (Not the Kinky Kind)
Wow what great presents!
I did a thing that scared me too. I think your blog helps give me courage. Even though you are a wacky yoga person.
Hard:
– Visiting the endodontist to see if my tooth needs a root canal. The “cold test” sent me flying out of the chair, and they did it TWICE.
– My dentist can’t take care of this tooth for another week and a half.
– Getting the bill for my co-pay on the skin cancer removal/reconstruction. So much for catching up on my credit card debt.
– The dayjob, after many pleasant weeks of quiet, suddenly ramped up in busyness. I’ll be busier than ever in the next month and a half, doing things I’m not all that excited about.
Good:
– Continued making progress on my lit review. Revelation: It doesn’t have to be perfect, just a draft. And it’s OK to change the focus based on what I find. Felt pressure ease off.
– Friend flew in from Calif unexpectedly and we had a great dinner with him. And I had another great night out with other friends who were in town. Pleasing social buzz.
– My dentist had provided me with an antibiotic in case the tooth started hurting, so I started taking them when I felt it pulse this week. No problems yet (knock wood).
– GREAT banjo lesson this morning, even though I didn’t have much time to practice this week.
Enjoy your gifts! (In *all* senses of that word) 🙂
Mikes last blog post..My future is assured
Your blog had it’s one-year anniversary this Tuesday!! Happy, happy anniversary, Havi. And Selma. And blog.
You’ve created such a warm, welcoming, loving place here for people to learn and grow and share themselves. Thank you for this beautiful blog, and for all the gifts you so generously bring.
My good and hard are all muddled up this week. Mostly, I’m so grateful for the incredible blessings of my life.
Love, Hiro
Hiro Bogas last blog post..Shepherd, Steward, Saint or Angel: What Kind of Leader Are You?
I hate to go to the dentist. Actually I hate going to any kind of doctor, but the dentist is particularly no fun.
Happy anniversary!
The hard?
Haven’t gotten out of the house the last couple of weeks except for groceries and errands. Was supposed to have lunch w/ a friend today but he bailed. Bummer.
Need to get out and have some fun somehow. Not feeling the fun these days.
The good?
Very productive week. Infinitely more than last week. So Yeah!
Didn’t sell any new business this week, which I’m counting as good because I’m scheduled for work almost to the end of this year which makes me feel all overwhelmed.
Avonelle Lovhaugs last blog post..Avoiding the cone of silence
Havi, the “Stuisms” always make me laugh, except today I started crying, too, because of the hard. And it wasn’t this week, it was a month ago and it still makes me cry. So I brought my box of kleenex over to the computer, because I know I have to do this. I wrote about it the other day and I’m just going to paste it in here so I don’t have to go through it all again — the writing.
It was a little over a month ago that it happened. I lost my middle dog-child. Not the fifteen-year-old daddy dog, but the eleven-year-old little girl dog who was the light of my life and the bane of my existence, usually in the same moment. She could do that because she was a Basenji, and they are…odd.
It had only been a few days earlier that I had downloaded the “destuckification guide,” and had started reading it. On that day, after my brother and I buried the dog, I tried to read some more, but I kept having to stop, and finally I gave up. There was not going to be any getting unstuck from this for a long time, I knew. Just like I knew that I couldn’t put my little dog back in her little lifeless body and make everything okay again.
I still have the Old Guy — the daddy dog, and the Puppy — my Mr. Wonderful, but they can’t do what she could do. She was the one who never had to be confined to a crate or kept on a leash in the house. She was the one who slept in the corner of my bedroom, giving me a dirty look while I got ready for bed — “turn off the frakking light, already.” She was my little girl dog, she was my little girl dog, she was my little girl…
There’s some good, too, a little. I made a new shade awning for the Old Guy and the Puppy, and built a support for it so I don’t have to bend over to walk under it, and mow under it.
And I entered two paintings in a local art show and went to the reception for it last night. It’s not a big show and there’s only one display in the center of the gallery floor and my paintings are on it and are the first ones you see as you go in the gallery door.
Judys last blog post..Post part deux
Happy Anniversary! I think this is the first Friday check-in I’ve left a comment on.
The Good:
Our church’s women’s retreat was wonderful last weekend. We all had a good time, and there was all sorts of sharing and bonding. And I got to see stars! You don’t see those often in Chicago.
The Hubby and I went to see Fiddler on the Roof, and Topol totally rocked. I’m so glad I got to see him live before he retired.
The Bad
I got Dissolve Procrastination and I’m procrastinating putting any of it to use and working.
I feel guilty because I haven’t written anything outside of my morning pages this week. No work on the book proposal, no work on the blog.
I’m very frustrated. For 13 years I worked my ass of to become an ordained minister in my former denomination, and last year I resigned for theological as well as personal reasons. Now I’m in a career limbo. I kind of know what I want to do, but not sure how to get there or if it will even turn out. It’s very frustrating. Trying to get my bearings and figure out the next steps. I don’t like being in limbo. I don’t even like playing limbo!
Okay I think this has gotten long enough. Thank you for making such a safe place for us to hang out Havi! I hope everyone has a good weekend!
Shawna R. B. Atteberrys last blog post..RevGal Friday Five: Life is a Verb
Happy blogiversary, Havi!
Lessee…
The hard:
Having to do a lot of mental/emotional work to see what it is I’m missing, what the disconnect is between me, my blog, my business and money.
The good:
Learning a lot from that. 🙂
Catherine Cantieri, Sorteds last blog post..Taming Time: Chronic lateness
I see lots of dental stuff here, we have insurance again, and it’s time to take the boys in and go in myself. :0
The hard:
Leak in the roof *again* from this morning’s torrential downpour (there were rocks covering Route 13 into town from people’s driveways, it had come down that hard and fast). Trying not to take it personally.
Having issues come up because now I can go to the doctor and get things taken care of. Lots of anger issues. Trying to separate body issues from self-esteem or self-worth issues. (hardhardhardhardhard)
The Ohio Art Council changed the grant process so that my discipline is not being considered this year. Throws my summer plans, since I was intending to work on that application all summer.
The good:
Qualifying for the medical insurance, and that our (old) doctors, dentist and optometrist accept that plan.
Spending a great time with Becky and Judy at QSDS yesterday. Bartering art for much needed supplies (lots of supplies, oh so much fun potential).
Our dog has only mild arthritis in her hips, even though according to the vet’s chart she is something like 84 years old. She still plays like a puppy.
Not having to work on the grant application all summer so there is a little time for playing on smaller pieces and whatnot. 🙂
Hope you all have a great weekend!
Andis last blog post..An A-Muse-Ing Workshop
@Judy – oh wow. So much hurt and hard. You must be feeling so sad and challenged right now without your girl-dog. Sending you as much love and comfort as you can stand to receive.
@Shawna – that’s quite a week. I’m glad you enjoyed your retreat.
And if it helps — if it doesn’t, ignore this — you have my permission to take as long as you need before diving into the Dissolving work. Everything happens in its time, and there’s probably a part of you that’s still absorbing the fact that you took a First Big Step. So no guilt from me! 🙂
@Mike – banjo lessons! Yay!
@everyone – so happy to have all of you in my week. It is always fun to have you here doing this ritual with me or sitting with me while I do it. Means a LOT. So thank you.
Hey Have and other Fluent Self-ers.
First of all congrats to you and Selma on your one-year anniversary! I also have no concept of time but love to celebrate, so YAY!
(And Shiva Nata sponsoring Roller Derby? That is freaking cool! So many levels of coolness.)
The Hard — painting. Not fun art painting (which, for me, is also HARD) but basement painting. Four full days worth of it. Yuck. I’m so ready to stop all the madness and get to focusing on doing the thing already!
Oh also, the waiting for the test results thing. That’s hard. Being in limbo. I will know my fate next week. (6 weeks later! grr!)
The Good — I’ve got my office and new computer all set up and will be blogging it up like crazy here real soon. Life is settling down. And summer in Portland is, like, crazy cool. Since it’s my first summer off from school in SEVEN YEARS, I’m really (really) excited.
Danielles last blog post..An update, a new blog and other yummy stuff.
Der. Havi, not Have. Ha! 🙂
Note to self: proof read before posting!
Danielles last blog post..An update, a new blog and other yummy stuff.
Happy Birthday Bloggie!
The Hard:
– A huge white board that we were trying to hang slipped from the wall and landed on my toe in flip flops. The metal part where you put the pens cut into my toe and it STUNG. The next day it was bruised. I’m okay. It just really hurt. Note: When hanging things and moving things. Covered-toe shoes are optimal.
– One of my friends is lying to me. I am nervous about talking about it with her. Trying first to understand why she might feel the need to lie. But also feeling hurt that she’s not more honest with me and doesn’t seem to feel safe with me. (As if it’s all about ME!?) Wanting to be honest with her about how I feel around it. And also being scared because I’m worrying about how she’s going to respond and whether she’ll still like me. This is just a mentally time consuming thing that’s been hard this week.
– Busy. Exhaustion. Wish there were more hours in the day. House isn’t organized from my office to living room switch still. Want to go to sleep for a whole day and wear an eye mask just to give my body huge doses of REST.
The Good:
+ Love my new haircut. My new girl Brittney is so fun and cute and awesome and she’s right around the corner from my house.
+ My knee is healed up and I got to go to ZUMBA class again. My favorite instructor was back and I shook my stuff with a big smile yesterday.
+ I have Electric Pink toenails. Not the color on the bottle (I didn’t look) but it’s the color I choose to call it now. It’s so fun.
+ Got to help a friend’s mom who is struggling with Fibromyalgia. Really inspiring to see how open and willing she is to help herself. Received lots of love and gratitude from my friend for spending time on the phone with her mom too.
+ There are BIRDS in my yard! I love them so much. I put seeds in this bird basket thing and they are coming to it, sitting in the bird basket and eating seeds! They really like sunflower seeds best. Both in the shell (so they can pry them out) or already out of the shell. I love watching them. I love seeing LIFE in my yard. I love seeing how they interact. I love the noises and chirps they make. I love looking in the basket to see what’s left and see how they left some shells.
+ I love my Sweet Bee. We’re getting along so well and our relationship gets deeper and better all the time. I feel like I get to know him better every day and we’ve been together for 7 years already. Amazing.
Hello Everyone and Happy Friday!
My chicken looks like this:
The good: Nana came to visit and we spent a couple of days wandering around the city and talking. She’s really cool and I love her.
The hard: Trying, trying, trying so hard to devise a first post for my blog and catching up on all my IttyBiz assignments. I am a bad starter and a bad student. I need to figure out why I’m stuck and start talking to it.
Happy Blog anniversary! It’s funny, I don’t mind the dentist but I hate the doctor — my dentist is engaged, interested, and willing to spend as much time on me as my issues require. I’ve never met a doctor like that!
The Hard:
A friend of mine passed away this weekend, who was also my php programmer on an ongoing project. I am having a really hard time with the idea of replacing him. Can’t I just have Stuart back? 🙁
Kitten was having one of those weeks where he decided he needed love and playing in the middle of the night a lot. And got the older cat to help. Sleep is for the weak, I guess!
Having procrastination issues on delivering a completed commission. Mostly involving the finding of a Large and Oddly Shaped Box in which to deliver it.
The Good:
Lots of friends and understanding all around. Much love from the kittehs, who seem to want attention all the time this week.
My house is clean(er)! I bribed a friend with farmer’s market tamales to vacuum, and cleaned the bathroom all on my own, and also got rid of some more detritus. Slowly, slowly, it feels more like where I want to live.
Painted today, before doing the Chicken. Jungle taking shape for 2010 calendar cover. Soon, a tiger will get to strut in all his glory before being covered by more jungle so he can properly lurk.
New prospect has already started calling me “my designer” so I have some extra confidence there. Networking in general is going pretty well.
Made progress on Antemortem Arts site. I now have a semi-functioning half-done CSS and html page! Once that’s done, I get to figure out how to make it into a WP theme. Fun fun.
I’m slowly learning to go easier on myself when I’ve got low energy, and find the things I can do best at those times, and take better advantage of the high energy times. I just wish there were more of the latter, but I’m not sure how to get it. I think Shiva Nata is on my to-buy list for my next big-ish check — my brain could use the help.
Amy Crooks last blog post..The Exercise Conundrum
Happy anniversary!
I love what you do, thank you. 🙂
Ingrid
Happy Blog Anniversary!!!! So glad it is here!
I share your feelings about the dentist. Although cleanings got easier when I started bringing my iPod in with me. I put on some tunes and it is easier to detach from what is happening in my mouth.
The hard:
– complete, utter exhaustion. Too much work stuff to deal with, too little time.
– a serious meltdown on Wednesday 1 hour before class when my computer ate the changes to my presentation AND I was getting bugged for the 100th time by the international office about a student’s application.
– humidity. Summer is here in the midwest, tons of rain and now it is really humid. I could never live down south.
– no news on my doctoral application yet. Getting antsy.
The good:
– a wonderful grand opening ceremony of a small theater at the retirement home where my father lived out his last days. While the last 16 months of his life were horrible (dementia), the staff were angels. Got to spend some time talking with one of my favorite staff members at the grand opening. It just felt good. Healing, closure, all that stuff.
– wonderful discussions by my students in the ethics class I’m teaching.
– a super supportive department chair. Offsets the crap I have to deal with from the program director.
– I finally have a summer “home” on campus where I can meet with students and do some work. No longer a nomad, at least for now!
Happy weekend, everyone!
Hi Havi:
Happy Birthday Dear Bloggie – and thank you for taking the time that you do to inspire me!!
I’ve done the dental blues and I know that song well – and it is hard hard hard, no matter how you slice it there. I hope you feel better soon.
It’s very cool that you’re going to sponsor your Roller Derby Team!!! I can just see you at those games going nuts. . . what fun.
As for me, it has been a mixed up week of lots of hard stuff with surprising rewards as well.
Thanks again for writing this blog and giving me great stuff to ponder.
Waah! I missed Friday Chicken!
Hard for me: Felt inadequate and useless for much of this week. I know I work hard, but I feel like it’s just not going to be good enough. Like I’m missing the magic key.
Good for me: Started my new position in work, and the team is wonderfully laid back and non-stressful. They’re also giving me free reign to run my own tiny empire the way I want. Aaaaah! Like finally being able to breathe.
I had a whine on my blog about feeling awful, in the name of being human and helping people through their own awful. Got some love from my scene sisters. 🙂 And an invitation to maybe start something awesome together.
Mostly a good week, despite feeling down about everything.
And my teas just arrived! And I’ve given myself the morning off! Wheee!
I really like my dentist, but I knew her from my spinning guild before I ever went to her as a dentist. I knew she was really nice, and since I’d seen her knitting and spinning, I knew she was good with her hands! So when I needed a dentist, I picked her.
But yeah, I had to get a crown last month, and that hurt. A lot. Really a lot. Not so much at the time because I had her give me a lot of anaesthetic (I was just on the edge of a migraine that day, so I was more sensitive to pain. HSPs unite!), but as it wore off, ow. And then I had to go back a couple of times, and…well, much pain ensued. Feels fine now though. Yay!
I greatly appreciate the absence of pain.
The good: I’m on vacation for two weeks! I can spend my time dyeing yarn and fiber!
The hard: I’m so exhausted from the huge project I was working on at my day job right before I left that I don’t have any energy to dye.
It’s hard for me to remember that it’s ok for me to take some time to just relax. I know intellectually that relaxation is a good thing, that I will be healthier and happier if I take some time to relax, that I’ll be more productive later if I take some time to recharge my batteries now. And yet, there’s this voice in my head saying “Slacker. Do you want your business to succeed or not? Get to work! You don’t have time to relax! You need to be productive! Other people work two jobs, why can’t you?” And another voice answers “Wha? Tired…”
Riins last blog post..a pain in the neck
The good: I took a few days and went to New Mexico with my crazy little family.
The hard: Everything did not do itself while I was gone. Ah well.
And I totally think you should create a product called The Absolved Romantic. Because, well, because.
Sonia Simones last blog post..Pink Hair Blogging
Happy blog anniversary! I’m happy that you started your blog, and extra happy that I’ve found it! 🙂
Surprise bluberries on top of the surprise strawberries? Fabulous!
I’m sorry that your Shiva Nata, meditation and yoga practices weren’t acting like themselves during that week, but I thank you for mentioning it. Knowing that it happens to you too is helpful.
Josianes last blog post..Creative vegan tip of the day!