Because it’s Friday AGAIN. And because traditions are important. In which I cover the good stuff and the hard stuff in my week, trying for the non-preachy, non-annoying side of self-reflection.
And you get to join in if you feel like it.
Man. I am wiped out.
This was one hell of a week.
One of those weeks where the hard and the good are essentially the same thing. Or they echo each other in interesting ways.
And I’m glad it’s over.
It’s also Rosh HaShana again. Again?! Didn’t we just do this last year?
The hard stuff
Still with the noise.
Still the noise and the jackhammers and the construction and the exhaustion.
The not sleeping. It’s not good.
My brother moved out.
I knew we wouldn’t get to have him around forever, and I’m glad for him that he’s doing what he needs to do.
But I’m also sad. And the timing. The timing is the crappy.
I made some hard decisions too.
I hate making hard decisions.
Especially when I can’t sleep or think because of all the noise, and so I don’t so much make decisions as grasp at straws.
Also, even though the decision I made was absolutely the right one, there’s fall-out.
And I also have to pass up on the opportunity to be featured (alongside my duck) in a four page spread in one of my favorite magazines. We had to cancel the photo shoot and Selma is not happy with me right now.
Ow! Learning how to take care of myself.
No one ever tells you how much it hurts.
My whole big ridiculous lesson for this past year has been learning to take care of myself.
And of course, as it turns out, that actually means doing everything I find completely terrifying. Terrifying and impossible.
Things like:
- saying no
- not shepherding (even when I really, really want to)
- speaking clearly and openly
- setting boundaries
- asking for things
- standing up for myself
- making tough decisions
- not meeting other people’s expectations.
Being confronted with my least attractive patterns.
Not just being in them in the most painfully obvious ways possible, but also having them pointed out to me.
The way I fold in the face of other people’s expectations.
The way I have trouble saying what’s really on my mind.
The way I unconsciously try to manipulate other people into making my hard decisions for me.
The way I shut down completely when the most helpful thing to do would be to explain what’s going on for me.
The good stuff
Friends. People who get it.
All the people reminding me what my stuckified patterns are up to managed do it in the most kind, loving, non-judgmental way possible.
Which is new territory for me.
I was able to make my hard decisions and do what I had to do in a safe, supportive environment. That was huge.
My gentleman friend.
Having someone around who is always unequivocally on my side … this is a really big deal right now.
Opportunities. Even when I don’t get to take them.
Just being asked to be featured in a four page article in a magazine is exciting. Neat!
I’m also feeling extremely relieved that my career is at a point where I can afford to turn down opportunities like that without being afraid that if I don’t do it, I’ll never “make it”.
Yeah, yeah. Now I’m trying too hard to turn this into good stuff.
Back to some more natural goodness.
My theme for the coming year. I know what it is now.
It’s sovereignty.
Sovereignty.
That’s what I’m working on. And I’m working on it through creating safe spaces for me.
The Sacramento workshop is completely booked.*
And the most amazing people are coming to it.
I love that people are flying out from New York and London to spend a day with me and Selma doing wackiness. It makes me seriously happy.
*If you’re sad that you didn’t make it, you can take a look and then send Marissa a note asking to be on the waiting list in case anyone cancels.
This hard, hard week is over.
Sigh of relief.
Tomorrow is Talk Like A Pirate Day!
Aye.
And the pirate queen and her pirate duck are probably not going to be doing all that much to celebrate it, seeing as how it’s Rash Kishansha Rosh HaShana and all.
I mean, it’s weird enough to be throwing breadcrumbs into the Spree while holding a scarf-wearing duck. Again. Plus I don’t know if I can talk like a pirate in German.
But what the hell. Talk like a pirate day. It makes me smile.
Also, thanks to Sally for sending me this.
Because ohmygod. It’s brilliant.
And … playing live at the meme beach house!
Yes, that’s a Stuism too.
There are no Stuisms this week because Stu’s microphone is being Mr. Crankypants. And because I am doing my writing on the go and Stu is not really very on-the-go-able.
Anyway, back to who’s playing what at the meme beach house.
My brother and I have this thing where we come up with ridiculous band names and then say in this really pretentious, knowing tone, “Oh, well, you know, it’s just one guy.”
So this week, I bring you:
Feed The Pony
Me: “Well, you know. You gotta feed the pony.”
My gentleman friend: “Huh?! That makes no sense.”
Me: “Context!”
My gentleman friend: “I’m right here. It still doesn’t make sense.”
Me: “You know what I mean though, right?”
My gentleman friend: “Only if you’re referring to that band Gotta Feed The Pony.”
Me: “Don’t tell me. It’s just one guy.”
That’s it for me …
And yes yes yes, of course you can join in my Friday ritual right here in the comments bit if you feel like it.
Yeah? Anything hard and/or good happen in your week?
And, as always, have a glorrrrrrrrrrrrious weekend. And a happy week to come.
And a sweet, happy new year if that’s your thing. 5770. It sounds better already.
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It is sooooo incredibly hard to think straight and make decisions when you are so so tired Havi. Lots of understanding for that – and in my humble opinion, it takes incredible strength to even see a pattern, let alone work with it. And that’s what you’re doing Havi – you’re working with what’s happening and seeing it from all kinds of angles. That’s really using your head while also acknowledging that your head is very tired.
How great that your gentleman friend really gets who you are and loves you for that – of course, how could he not?!
The hard for me was some extended family typical behavior that somehow I find very surprising every time it happens. I just keep going back and checking in to see “is this really who you are?” just in case something has changed – and it’s still the same. And somehow, it always shocks me.
The good is that this time it shocks me much less than in times past – I see my own courage and willingness to let go of my expectations around them. I attribute this in part to your work which has helped me see this more clearly.
I wish you a restful New Year and all that you want in the coming year. I’ll be thinking of you.
Lots of love always.
.-= Char´s last blog ..test =-.
I am sorry the jackhammers are still there, but so happy that Sacramento sold out already. 5770 sounds a lot better to me too!
This week in Ohio:
The Hard:
My inlaws’ response to Marty going back to school was less than stellar.
Not being able to fix Aisha’s problems with her roomie.
Wondering when the second package was going to arrive at its new home (it took a week!)
The Good (Fantastic and Amazing even!):
I have a friend who had a double hip replacement at the Mayo Clinic late last month. She had polio as a child and has always had one leg about 2″ shorter than the other. They were able to lengthen the leg and now both her legs are the same length. She still has a recovery period, but is doing really well.
Earlier this week on the bike path I saw a doe and three fawns. Two of the fawns were frolicking like dogs at the edge of the river. They were SO cool!
Last Friday after I Chickened, I saw a tree full of white egrets near the dentist’s office. Amazing!
The paintings arrived to their new owner safe and sound (it only took a week Priority Mail! ) and she loves them. 🙂
The Hadassah meeting on Wednesday was really fun and I met some new women I didn’t know before.
I found some great SpongeBob Halloween stickers at Target and my calendar is filling up with them (I reward myself with a sticker on days I work out).
Marty got 8.4 out of 10 on his first memo. Not bad for being out of college 21 years! 🙂
Oh, and the curator for the show I thought I’d missed the deadline for emailed me. When I told her all of my work was too big, she gave me a ballpark measurement and I was able to submit two pieces after all.
So that’s my week in an eggshell. I hope you all have a glorious weekend and a wonderful 5770!
.-= Andi´s last blog ..Stu-Stu-Studio =-.
Happy Friday and Chicken and Rosh HaShana..
The Good: Opportunities arising for me to get my hands on people in the community, in the form of chair massage, both for pay and for charity. Three in one month! And the reminders that not only is there a thriving holistic community here, but I am becoming a ‘name’ within it. Oh! And designed my new bix cards and brochures all by myself using skills I learned in art school about a million years ago.
The Hard: Money stuck and marriage stuck. Still. Thought somehow it was going away (why? wishful thinking). Reminded again this morning, that no, the hard has really only just begun.
The good again: going to help someone with a website. For money. Weird.
.-= Gina´s last blog ..of flakey muses and flying shoes =-.
Shana Tovah!
This week’s “Hard” was also this week’s “Good” – coming up with a resolution. I try to make internal self-improvement resolutions at Rosh Hashanah, and external ones at January 1. And I’ve been keeping track of them for a while:
5765 was for self-realization.
5766 was for growth and strength.
5767 was for honesty.
5768 was for not letting fear stop me.
5769 was for equanimity.
5770 will be for confidence.
It struck me that “confidence” and “sovereignty” are quite similar. Thank you for sharing your theme for the upcoming year, and for giving us the space to share our themes with you.
Best wishes for a sweet, happy, healthy New Year!
.-= Pirate´s last blog ..In Which the Pirate Swears She’s Done Now. =-.
Yay Chicken!
Still with the jackhammers? I’m wishing for more quietude for you.
So the hard:
-I feel kind of goofy even admitting this to myself, but there is something about the moon waning that just messes with me. Draws me inward and makes me dull. So inwardness and dullness this week. Oh, and migraines like giant birds eating my brain.
-On top of that, my hub’s girl-friend came for a visit. And I love her. And he loves her. And everyone thinks I should be so bothered. And I’m not, but then I wonder if I should be, and…you see where this is going. Conflicted. Not easy.
-Time is kicking me in the … you know.
The Great:
-My Trevor post was an item. (And I saw Trevor again the same day, hiding in his weed-fortress.) That was cool!
-There are bees, underground in the back yard. They’re really cool to just sit and watch. I find myself wondering how far each one is going to bring back nectar for his hive-mates. Just cool. Watching the bee’s sky-paths.
-I had a blast in the art store loading up on drawing supplies and have started keeping a daily sketchbook. It’s fun to redevelop old talents.
-I got a library card yesterday. The Little Bird followed me around and every time I would pause to look, she’d sit on the floor with her big book about underpants and read. Sweet.
-The moon is new today, so I might start feeling more expansive again soon. (Yes, my “weirdo” alert is going off again…sigh.) And the Equinox is Tuesday, and I love fall. The pumpkins are turning orange on the vine.
.-= Emily´s last blog ..Strawberry Salad…Sweeeeet =-.
This is ridiculous. I actually can’t think of any ‘hard’ this week.
Not that everything has been great and perfect and rosy. Oh. Yeah. There was some ‘hard’. But it’s been dealt with and processed and accepted.
This week just ‘was’, I guess. In a good and peaceful and happy sort of way, despite the hard.
Thanks for the post that made me just realize that.
Wow.
All the best!
deb
.-= Deb Owen´s last blog ..why creativity matters (& what being more creative can do for you) =-.
@Deb So wonderful when a week’s hard processes like that!
@Havi So sorry you’re going through jackhammers and no sleep. That’s just ICK. Sending energy for better living arrangements toward you.
My week?
The hard:
~Nasty ear infection. Sick stinks.
~Herding cats at work.
~Maintaining Healthy Boundaries. Even with help from spray.
The good:
~Fishing with Dad and Husband.
~Herding cats at work… I’m succeeding, I think!
~Remembering to take care of ME.
~Rush week at work is over!
~Unstuck and stitching again!
~Designs finished!
~Mailing List software installed!
~Progress in many areas obvious for the first time in what feels like AGES!
~Having an office where I can close the door and do Shivanata on small breaks and return to being me.
.-= G. Romilly´s last blog ..Shivanata, a workshop, and Selma the duck! =-.
Oh with the Jackhammers – grrrr on your behalf. How annoying/ tedious/ yuck. Sending you a soft and silent night of sleep.
On with my week;
The Hard:
Of which there has been much but of which I can remember little, other than a general sensation of “ugh”.
-Shoulders around my ears from feeling stressed about life in general, mostly my work.
-Being charge of the driving. I am the work taxi this week as the normal nominated taxi driver has had the audacity to take a week off. The cheek of it! But yeah – tiring and achy muscles everywhere.
-Mouth ulcers – because I haven’t been able to eat fruit and normal goodness over the past few weeks due to my body doing a bizarre flip out over anything with any sugar of any sort in it. I’m getting back to normal, but my poor ol bod has been suffering.
-Tired! So tired because I’ve not been sleeping well. Waking up in the middle of the night and my brain switching on. Not being able to switch off.
– Talking to my ex husband about our house and mortgages and general “tying up loose ends” business. Oof. It’s only been about a year and a half since we split up!
– And so on.
The good:
-recognising the stress. Oh I can help myself when I recognise the stress. YAY.
– massages tomorrow. Hurrah, no more sore shoulders.
-Finding my Bear. I found a Paddington Bear, to cuddle. Wormington Sqaure now has a Paddington Bear! Hurrah.
-Being able to eat fruit again. I’ve missed it. No more unexplained nausea at the thought of sugar in anything.
– Talking to my ex husband and starting to tie up loose ends. We can talk and drink tea and be nice to eachother. I saw the dogs, we talked. It is worth doing.
– IT’S THE WEEKEND!
Have a fantabulous one, full of glooooooriousness and awesomesauce.
.-= Wormy´s last blog ..A Most Terrible Word… =-.
The hard and the good being the same, or echoing each other. Yes.
I regret your hard, your giving up opportunities, all of it. But I’m so grateful to know someone with your level of success that is not saying “I used to be just like you. But now I’m happy, happy happy and rich rich rich and you can be too if you just buy my Thing.”
One of the things I love about you, Havi, is your humanity.
My good this week:
Actually feeling first benefits of massive increase in my D3 vitamin supplements to overcome vit D deficiency. Sometimes my happiness is right here without having to go diving for it. I’ve actually found myself laughing out loud. Hello Mahala sweetie, I’ve missed you.
The hard:
Adrenal fatigue relapse. Happening right now. Plateau’s and relapses are part of the healing process. But it’s hard to come crashing down.
Other hard. I posted a guided meditation on my blog and have heard very little in the way of feedback. I know there’s ego involved but there’s also “I want to give you this thing that could help you feel so much joy.” (Which is still ego, I suppose.) But it brings up those feeling of seeing people starving for self-acceptance and love, wanting to feed them, having something that could be part of feeding them and wondering if it’s being received. *Not my responsibility* I know, but hard to accept.
.-= Mahala Mazerov´s last blog ..The Bowl of Stars – A Guided Meditation =-.
Happy Rosh HaShana – if one says that 🙂 I’m sorry to hear about the jackhammers, and happy that the Sacramento course sold out. (When will you be doing one in Dublin, eh? Eh?)
Hard this week:
The monies. We’re basically through the extension work now (just the snag list to clear up) and into the aftermath.
OMGeeeee we’re SO BROKECash-flow isn’t exactly abundant. And there’s only so often we can get those calls saying “oh, yeah, and you remember this other supplier is owed thirteen hundred, right?” before it begins to be … irksome. Problematic, even! We’ll make it through, all right, but the next few months are going to be tough.Good this week:
People: Niall, the kids, my sister, my mother-in-law. Not one but two home-ed outings, with playing children and chatting parents (just like I was promised but rarely experience). My chamber choir rehearsing a glorrrrrrrious Bach and Mendelssohn programme. My secret embroidery project, with which I am extravagantly in love.
.-= Lean Ni Chuilleanain´s last blog ..Women’s Work: The First 20,000 Years, by Elizabeth Wayland Barber =-.
Oh, not meeting other people’s expectations, ick and double-ick. Maybe there’s a little not meeting your own expectations of what other people expect of you? That’s a biggie for me, anyway.
Talk Like a Pirate Day! Instructions here: http://www.yarr.org.uk/talk/
My hard this week:
– My flaky client flaked on me one last time and I had to “fire” her. Ick.
– Several days of avoiding what turned out to be a very minor task. Why do I do that?
Good:
+ Another Havi’s-blog-reader bought another little painting! I’m giddy. (Thanks Marie!)
+ My open studio went well, and I even sold some art.
+ The inaugural Los Angeles urban chicken meeting is tomorrow! Chickens in the city, yay!
“I’m right here. It still doesn’t make sense.” Made me laugh out loud. Thank you for that.
.-= Barbara J Carter´s last blog ..New little-bitty painting “Dots 12 (Open Grid)” =-.
Hmm. Are/were there German pirates?
The hard. Loud electrical work going on at work. Lots of really loud whining drilling sounds and pounding. Even with the office door shut, it’s loud loud loud. It makes me want to crawl under my desk with a pillow wrapped around my head.
And a migraine since Wednesday.
The good. The migraine is starting to subside. The pain isn’t so bad anymore; it’s just the postdrome fog and occasional buzzing in my head. As long as I don’t try to concentrate or think too hard, I’m ok.
And being home with a migraine equals no loud electrical work. (Hmm. Ya think the loud loud loud had something to do with the migraine in the first place?)
And my gentleman friend. A fellow vegan, he brings me gifts of fruits and vegetables. How nice is that?
And raspberries! There are tons of raspberries in my garden right now. I can gorge myself on fresh sweet juicy raspberries!
.-= Riin´s last blog ..Business = busyness =-.
5770? Wow. That’s a very big number.
The hard: knowing we have to move house, but not having a place to move to yet. I’m sure we’ll find something, but I still worry.
Getting frustrated and cranky with Shiva Nata. I’m on a break from my daily habit. I can’t seem to make it hard enough and feel like I’m doing it wrong. I used to feel all clever because I was learning it so quickly, but I’ve come to realise that’s not actually a good thing.
The good: Someone is paying me real monies to draw things. Wheee! My plan to fool people into thinking I’m a professional illustrator is working! Ha ha ha!
At least I have yoga. That’s still pretty damn awesome. And the chicken. That’s good too.
Happy Rosh Hashana! I can’t believe the jackhammers are still going. Here’s to you getting some peace and quiet and sleep soon!
@Char thanks for your comment on your extended family. My extended family (not mention nuclear unit) is interesting to say the least, and I needed the reminder on letting go of expectations. Thank you.
Like @Deb Own, there really wasn’t any hard this week. Which is good. Most of August was hard, so I enjoyed the break.
The good is mostly due to My Fantabulous Hubby who, when I was really depressed, decided I needed some pampering. He got me a spa day, which I did Wednesday. It was heaven, sheer heaven. My major epiphany is that I HAVE to take care better care of myself. Self-care has to be a priority, a top priority, and not something I do if I have time. Major, major revelations on how badly I treat my body, and that has to change.
I’m preaching Sunday, and the sermon is going well. I’ve really enjoyed the research, and now I need to make some decisions and write the sermon. I’m not totally freaking out, which is the normal Friday procedure. So that’s good.
I also said no to something I could have went to tomorrow, and wanted to go to, but it was just going to crunch things up to much. So I said no, so I wouldn’t be freaking out about the sermon and how much I’m behind. Very glad I did that.
I hope everyone has a good weekend and a Happy New Year to those who are entering 5770!
.-= Shawna R. B. Atteberry´s last blog ..Proverbs 31: A “Capable” Wife, Huh? =-.
Dearest Havi
So my husband (aka The Boy) is in a band. And the band is called The Black Thom Cassidys.
And yes, I am sure you guessed it right – it’s just one guy (my husband).
I kid you not….
I am happy that the hard week is over, and that the word for your new year is sovereignty. And that Brigitte wanted to do a spread on you!!!! I used to devour those magazines in the old days when I actually spoke/read German.
Much love
Tatty
.-= TattyFraney´s last blog ..Putting a show together – Part1 =-.
Erf. I hear you on the hard and good echoing each other.
The past few weeks have been very intense, and I’ve let some things slip a little, but it is OK.
The Hard:
Some kind of planetary alignment is upping the wackiness… friend stress, boy stress, family stress, boundaries stress, work stress, financial stress…. culminating in me running a red light yesterday on account of thinking too hard… VERY scary and dangerous. I am not in the habit of poor driving, I wasn’t on the phone or anything… just suffering overwhelm. So I decided to stop, get a sandwich and slow down purposefully. What a big heads-up to realize that I need to chill a little bit.
The good: Attending to myself. The last couple of weeks I have been thinking about that word- attention, tending, attend. I love etymology, and I am not sure what is there in that word, but there is some little buzz in my head about it. The very good- good friends, family, and dog. <3
XOXO to you all.
I am *delighted* to say that there hasn’t been too much hard the past week or so. Which is good, because the couple months preceding it were nothing but hard. I definitely feel like I’m in a state of course-correcting, like doing the 57-point turn to get a car out of a tight parking spot. But once I can spot a good opening, I feel like I can just take off after it. Which is a nice change.
Very happy 5770 to all!
.-= Catherine Cantieri, Sorted´s last blog .."Hoarders" =-.
Havi –
I was contemplating a post about shoe throwing today, when I recalled a quote from Austin Powers that made me laugh… and brings the whole thing into another light. Maybe you know it… if not, the quote is “Honestly, who throws a shoe?!!!!” which is in reference to a villain that kills with deadly shoe throws.
I think that will be what I will train my brain to say when there has been a shoe lobbed at me, in Mike Myers’ fake English accent, of course.
.-= Lisa´s last blog .. =-.
Yeah, sovereignty. Havi, you’re taking good care of my friends with what you say here.
.-= Mark W. “Extra Crispy” Schumann´s last blog ..MarkWSchumann: @bruce_p_smith <peeps who take a little piece of info and twist it like a knife> Sorry about that. =-.
Sovereignty – that sounds like a perfect theme to focus on, and I’m really looking forward to hearing more of your thoughts on it!
This week:
The hard
Dentist stuff, and realizing that some medical professionals have no clue that what they really need to offer is a sense of trust and safety and confidence. I’ll probably be in the market for a new dentist after my appointment on Tuesday.
Work stuff. And the frustration of it not being enough to just do my work and do it well. All the little games are so not my thing.
The good
I was an Item! and a Wiry Fankle this week! That is super exciting.
I’m seeing some momentum start to build in my business.
So, so grateful for the support of all my friends in getting this business going!
.-= Victoria Brouhard´s last blog ..What’s Happening, Hot Stuff #2 =-.
Well… reading what you’ve been working on this year, I recognize many of my own patterns which could use work/dissolution. It is hard taking care of oneself.
I usually pick my theme for the year around Jan.1, but sovereignty really appealed to me since you first mentioned it. Owning one’s sovereignty is badass, in the loveliest way possible. Heck, my personal odometer flips over tomorrow and besides, there’s no reason I can’t adopt a new/additional theme now anyway.
The idea of talking like a pirate in German made me laugh. Definitely a good day to share my birthday with. Yarr!
.-= claire´s last blog ..Spring Breakdown rundown =-.
I remember how happy you were when your brother moved in with you, so I totally get how hard it must be to know that he’s moved out now. I bet the Hoppy House will feel empty when you come back home. Hopefully, he’s not too far and will be able to visit regularly!
This week started on a very good note: I’ve had a productive day on Monday, like I hadn’t had in a long time. I worked on my next (long overdue) blog post, and got something done that had been on my to-do list for several months.
I was hoping that I’d be able to keep going and move forward on a couple of things, but the momentum didn’t last, and I couldn’t do much (almost nothing, in fact) since Tuesday. So what would have already been labeled “hard” in a normal week felt even harder by virtue of following a day such as I had on Monday. Oh well. As you say, the week is over, and I feel like things are slowly getting better.
Oh, one more good bit: I dreamt of you this morning! In my dream, my gentleman friend and I got to hang out with you and your gentleman friend. We were at a huge book fair where my gentleman friend was launching his latest book, and you were launching yours! How awesome is that? That was pretty sweet, and a very good start to my day! (By the way, can’t wait to read your book!) 🙂
.-= Josiane´s last blog ..Retreating to write – and being treated to so much more =-.
Happy 5770! Not that I knew it was 5770 before I read it here, and then I had to Google to figure out wtf that meant, but I’m all for any reason to celebrate these days.
The Hard:
– Work momentum has come crashing to a halt. I’m still going on the projects I have, but the getting of new ones (and their moneys) is… not happening. Ugh.
– Tired. Sleep has become so necessary for me and I’ve always been an insomniac.
– Hot! Heat wave coming, and trying to fry my poor wee brain.
– Lack. Unpleasant money surprises. Worryworryworry.
The Good:
+ Rest. And being in a position to take it as needed.
+ Cats. Cuddly this week, which I needed.
+ New wok! And a blog post about it, which is good.
+ Creative progress! All this lying fallow has finally borne some fruit, in a few places, anyway.
+ Friends. And how much I appreciate them, and they appreciate me.
.-= Amy Crook´s last blog ..Films about Ghosts =-.
Yay! I’m actually able to post on Friday! I completely get the part about the good and the hard being essentially the same.
The really hard:
– X-Treme Education – what happens when you end up teaching 2 courses (16 week semester) where you have to build the materials from week to week AND you start your doctoral program at the same time AND you have more internships to manage for your students than in the history of the program.
– Not being able to properly celebrate my husbands 50th birthday. See X-Treme Education.
– Missing our kitty more and more every day. The house is so lonely without her. Really could have used some cat cuddles at the end of my long, long days. Or to start off my mornings.
The good:
– FINALLY figuring out that the high-tech mattress pad was making my shoulder WORSE not better. Have slept like a rock the past 2 nights since we took it off.
– My students. They are the best.
– My groupmates for the doctoral program. They ROCK!
– My department chair who did her best Mother Bear impersonation when my idiot boss was trying to discredit all the work I’ve done the past two summers on our exit exam process. She ROCKS!
– My husband for being so supportive of the X-Treme Education situation that I’ve put myself in.
– My best friend from high school who listens to my whines and rants! And loves me anyways!
Havi! Havi! Havi! So proud of you for being so you, you were asked to be featured in a magazine. Sad that you can’t do it, but proud that you can say no and know that you will have many, many more opportunities.
Ah, the hard:
-What felt like a complete lack of sovereignty in my life–where all my self worth seemed to depend on outside forces. Blech.
-Faced some difficult family patterns which was both good and hard–hard because I realized how much I’ve internalized one negative thought pattern in particular, related to the ever popular “who do you think you are, anyway?” Good because I saw it outside of myself when I’d kind of forgotten about it/buried it.
-Blog angst.
-Second guessing my art–does this suck or not suck? Back and forth, back and forth.
-And finally, too much striving. I hate striving, it’s hollow.
The Good:
-Incredible support from my younger sister who always has my back.
-My sister seeing the negative thought pattern in action and commenting on it to me without me bringing it up (so that I don’t feel like I’m just being hyper-sensitive).
-Lots of loving-ness from my husband.
-Made real progress on creating new work on a deadline.
-A gallery owner telling me that I’m making everything so easy for her by being so prepared.
Wishing you good silence. 🙂
.-= Sarah´s last blog ..Art Collaborations/Conversations =-.
Hoping that this new moon & upcoming autumnal equinox makes things a bit easier than this week has been for most. I definitely add my good wishes for Havi finding a quiet, peaceful, dreamy place to sleep and meditate.
For me this week: hard… bumping up against my fears to the point of black and blue bruising. Sleep schedule messed up, kitchen sink on the fritz, dogs rebelling.
good… facing some of the fears head on. Feeling inspired about my novel, epiphanies galore about my business, reconnecting to some beloved friends, and having a little mystical experience too.
.-= Kate T.W.´s last blog ..Lynda Barry Rocks! =-.
Another week, another chicken. (When I have real chickens this will be even better.)
The hard:
– I’m sitting on the floor of my living room, kinda off to the side because my diabetic cat pissed on the couch and puked in three places around the room. I’m in the clean spot. I can’t sleep, again.
– The busy busy busy week I’ve had has left me exhausted, but the lingering crazy keeps me awake as my hyper head squirrels keep scurrying from place to place and won’t let me sleep.
– the new meds have let me gain 7 pounds in one week. Bleh. Is it better to be fat or insane? Hrm…
The good:
+ I could only think of three hards this week!
+ The new meds are doing their thing so the crazy is dialed waaaaay back. It’s nice to be able to have good days again. More meditation and ShivaDance helped this process.
+ My current contract is for some truly exciting new technology and the client has set me up with a geek’s dream workstation. The head-squirrels are *loving* this, and so is helper-monkey me.
+ The diabetic cat seems to be healthier and perkier.
Signing off from the lovely city of San Francisco…
.-= Casey Cole´s last blog ..Dave’s Top Ten Rules of Business =-.
I sympathize with your noise problem, as I am very noise sensitive myself. I find that cylinder-shaped foam earplugs (not the cones, they just don’t do it) work wonders. When I visit somewhere noisy (or when the car rally passes close by) I actually get some sleep now when I use the plugs, which you can buy in chemists. If they press in my ear when I sleep on my side, I push a little hollow into the pillow for my ear, which stops the pressure. Not giving any advise, just sharing my experience. Havi, use ear plugs. Havi, use ear plugs
.-= judyofthewoods´s last blog ..Foraging in June =-.
The Bad –
Ugh, the joke just fell flat, as the fake html tags with “subliminal” and “/subliminal” around “Havi, use earplugs” got ignored.