In which I cover the good stuff and the hard stuff in my week, trying for the non-preachy, non-annoying side of ritual and self-reflection.
And you get to join in if you feel like it.
Chicken! A leetle late, but it’s still Friday.
I have not even the slightest idea what happened this week, but here we are on the other end of it.
Let’s see…
The hard stuff
Did I really get nothing done? It kind of seems like that.
This might just be the monsters talking but I’m pretty sure I got absolutely screw-all done this week.
The past several days have been so obscenely unproductive that I would have been much better off actually going on vacation.
Note to Slightly Future Me: in times of extreme lack of results, run away!
So that’s what I look like when I laugh. Huh.
Nothing adds to general insecurity like seeing yourself on video.
And since we shot a ton of Shiva Nata footage this week, I have spent way more time than normal/necessary looking at myself.
It wasn’t all bad. I learned all sorts of useful things (Hey, I’m funny when I teach! And I smile way more than I thought I did!).
But there was also just that awkward and horrible dawning realization that yes, this is you. Sort of like this.
People.
Specifically people who don’t yet have the skill and ability to take responsibility for their stuff, and so they end up projecting their problems, stuckness and pain onto you.
A lot of really not–sovereign communication coming my way this week.
Noise!
Construction near Hoppy House. Construction near the Playground.
Everything is noisy and annoying, which is probably also related to the Great Not Getting Anything Done of May 2011.
Argh.
The good stuff
Video! We shot video!
Since this project has been in the works since oh, 2005…
And since I am deathly afraid of video cameras…
This was kind of a big deal.
I wore the sparkly pink wig and taught a couple of extremely silly Shiva Nata classes, where both hilarity and buttery epiphanies reigned supreme.
Lots of giggling. And the main thing: it happened!
Which means it could — theoretically — happen again!
And it wasn’t hard.
That’s my second yay about the video.
After all that terror, it turned out that once I started teaching I completely forgot that the camera was there.
And I didn’t look half as ridiculous as I did when they interviewed me on German television either. So there!
Well, I’m sure the wig doesn’t really help with not looking ridiculous, but it helped with everything else.
Lovely coincidences.
Today was the week of running into people I know.
Or people I didn’t know that I knew but actually did.
And it was marvelous.
I have the best eye doctor in the entire world.
This is something that I always forget, so it really needs to go into the Book of Me:
Hey, Havi. Guess what? You like him! He makes you laugh! It’s a much easier experience than you think it’s going to be.
Also: there’s some fabulous new technology that means I don’t ever have to get my eyes dilated ever again.
Let’s have some serious dork dancing to celebrate this fabulous piece of news.
Sun!
Much walking around happily in the park and reading in the garden.
And making fun of all the fair-weather-frolickers. 🙂
Jeans.
So. I bought jeans this week.
This might not sound like news, but I haven’t worn jeans in seven years.
And this week it was suddenly time.
Plus the first pair I tried on fit me perfectly, which I seem to recall as being a HIGHLY unusual occurrence.
This is probably only a big deal in my head, but it’s a very big deal in there so be happy with me!
Epic healing nap.
I was at the Playground and dozed off in the Refueling Station there for nearly three hours.
After which everything was magically better.
Stuffed mushrooms!
Just like I remember from the Babar books…
My gentleman friend, who also happens to be the best cook I have ever met, has been outdoing himself this week.
Also fresh sunflower seed bread from the Hoppy House sourdough (yes, that’s our backyard!) and the most unbelievable things with jerusalem artichokes.
And … playing live at the meme beach house it’s the Fake Band of the Week!
My brother and I have this thing where we come up with ridiculous band names and then say in this really pretentious, knowing tone, “Oh, well, you know, it’s just one guy.”
This week’s band is brought to you by Amna and it’s called:
Sad Lumpy Routine
They’re more upbeat than they sound. Check them out if you have a chance. And keep in mind, it’s really just one guy.
That’s it for me …
And of course you can join in my Friday ritual right here in the comments if you feel like it.
Yes? Anything hard and/or good happen in your week?
And, as always, have a glorrrrrrrrrrrrious day, a restful weekend and a happy week to come. Shabbat shalom.
p.s. It’s okay if it’s not Friday anymore. There’s complete chicken amnesty — you can join in whenever (or not) and it’s no big deal.
p.p.s. One spot left at this coming Rally (Rally!). May 16-19. It is going to be amazing.
Follow
Jeans are a huge deal, Havi. HUGE. Snaps all around for ones that fit. Woo!
The hard:
– Not too productive at all at the day job.
– Major sickness happening in my house right now. Poor dear.
– Sometimes writing shows you the parts of yourself you kind of avoid. And it’s less than comfortable.
– Midtown Manhattan is a very bad place for an HSP to be. Blech.
– I’ve been majorly missing chats with Adriana while she’s been on vacation.
The good:
– Finally got The Highly Sensitive Person from the library.
– Speaking of which, my neighborhood library is back open again. Joy!
– Fun, light writing also happened. Good to know Writer Me isn’t always all gloom and doom.
– Getting photo sessions scheduled for my PDX/Seattle trip! Yay!
– Much love flowing to my business.
– Had a great sweaty workout this week.
Have a super glorious weekend, everybody!
Chicken!
Huzzah.
Yay for jeans! i didn’t used to wear them and remember the day i first wore them too 🙂 and yay for things not seeming as bad after as they did before!
It’s Friday. I said last week that by this chicken, my dissertation would be handed in… well, it is! Phew!
The Hard
– dissertation stress
– lack of sleep
– doing paid work the day after dissertation deadline [waking at 7am]
– housemate also stressed from it; a few heated words
– severe stomach cramps
– lack of good food or exercise
– running out of bread so no toast
– a shoe! A shoe on the most stressful day ever [dissertation deadline] a shoe from a friend. Tried to remember it shows their stuff but ouch!
– forgetting to eat
– knowing I have an essay and two exams still
– trying to be there for my other half through this [and feeling guilty for failing]
The Good
• it’s over!
• Being able to write blogs again
• Picking up a book to read for pleasure
• Tea!
• Chocolate!
• Whiskey!
• Having 3 weeks to revise
• Just bought loads of fresh ingredients to try to learn to cook better! Experiments ^_^ (potions!)
• Having space and time to practise shivanata
• Three days off – Friday, Saturday and Sunday where all I have to do is sleep, eat, read, draw, paint, write, revise and a bit of essay editing.
Have a glooorious weekend!!! x
Well.
Fitting.
Jeans.
Huzzah!
Oh, Chicken! It’s so good to see you. Also: yay for jeans! I’m wearing a pair today.
Hard:
–Despite good intentions and best efforts, my family didn’t make it to my concert quite on time, which meant that they missed the first item on the program, which was what I most had wanted to share with them. (Some of them may have heard some of it while waiting to be let into the concert hall. Not. The Same.)
–I had this brilliant idea that I would sit them down the following night with a recording of the piece of music I so wanted them to hear, and that I would sing along with the recording, and it would be special and maybe even better. Didn’t quite work the way I had hoped, in large part because I was vocally fatigued and not warmed up and very nervous. Argh. Argh. Argh.
–One family member reacted to hearing my vocally fatigued singing by gently asking if maybe I shouldn’t be singing soprano anymore. Pushed so many buttons in me, swirled up my stuff so severely, that I couldn’t get to sleep until 4AM.
–And then I was sleep deprived and struggling for the rest of the week.
Good:
–The concerts this weekend went beautifully. I sang well, and had a fabulous time.
–Saturday was an especially magical day, filled with unexpected beauty and delight. I’ll share one of the highlights: I had lunch at a Chinese restaurant, and the fortune in my fortune cookie said, “Ooops…wrong cookie.” I showed the fortune to my server and sweetly said that perhaps I should ask for another cookie; she brought me one, and that fortune said, “Fortune favors him who dares.” You can’t make this stuff up!
–Two good things have come out of the vocal fatigue debacle. First, I’ve begun taking some steps to protect my vocal health, and am already seeing results. Second, the whole thing has made me more aware than ever of how much I want to stop getting so hung up on what other people think of me. It’s my biggest stumbling block to sovereignty, and I’m working on it — seeing how much further I still want to go, and also giving myself credit for how far I’ve come.
–My daughter gave me a buttercup.
I’ll be housecleaning for most of the weekend. I’m determined to find ways of having fun with it!
Woo-hoo for Chickening!
And yay for new jeans! It was a big deal to me when I found jeans that fit on the fifth try. So the big deal in your head gets to be a big deal in mine too.
The week!
The Hard:
– Moving. Not sleeping. New people. New things. All my stuff every which way. Organizing it taking way longer than it should.
– Not writing. I didn’t try to fit in writing time because I didn’t want to stress myself more, but in the Performance Revue(!) of this move, we’re putting in a note about finding time to write in the future. Four days without is too many.
– My last house was an almost ideal situation until both my housemates got boyfriends. This house isn’t an ideal situation even to start with. I wish I were more excited. I wish I didn’t see several more moves on the immediate horizon.
– I am way more addicted to the internet than I suspected. And I had suspicions.
The Good:
– I live in Portland. Me of nine years ago finally got her wish. There is an awesome park just by my house! My cat is super happy with this new living arrangement. My new room is wonderfully kooky.
– My dad was (and other family members/friends were) so helpful! I live in a world where I get help when I need it (crazy). Dad procured internet by talking on the phone with various people for 2 hours. I couldn’t have ever done that and would still be unhappily without internet several weeks hence. Also, I never would have got the boxsprings up the stairs.
– My new website! Will be live in less than two weeks! Is fabulous! Etc.!!!
– Sinking back into writing today felt SO GOOD. Like a warm bath. And I sounded a bit stilted but was less blocked than expected.
– Last night I finally got a decent night’s sleep.
Yay, Friday!
Yay, Friday Chicken!
Yay, jeans! I want some new jeans too!
Is everybody having an unproductive week?
The good:
+ I started posting about the virtual trip and no one has thrown shoes. I asked a professional photographer if I could link to his pictures on Flickr and he wrote back that the idea was preposterous and ridiculous and he loves it.
+ My mom spent a few days with me and things went well. The things that might have been difficult because of her dementia weren’t. Because my brother was here, I didn’t have to drag her with us when I took my husband to his appointments, and that made things more manageable. We had fun together.
+ I got a beautiful little rose bush in the mail as a gift.
+ I used some of the techniques I’ve learned from this blog to talk myself through a situation that hooked into some old stuff that had hooked into some even older stuff. What is true and what is also true. Now is not then.
The hard:
– My computer is acting up. Using someone else’s computer is like wearing someone else’s clothes; they don’t quite fit and they don’t feel familiar.
– Too much on my plate! The knowledge that some of it wouldn’t be there if I’d taken care of it earlier. Throwing shoes at myself and trying to make myself not do it.
– I can’t find things. I can’t find some notes I made for my virtual trip. I can’t find my landscape design and it’s time to start planting.
– Pain and lack of sleep. Sometimes the weather makes me ache. Taking my osteoporosis medicine makes my shoulders hurt. Pain keeps me awake. Lots of things keep me awake at night.
– My mom’s visit, while pleasant, was unexpected and unplanned and I had to re-make my entire week because of it. Most of what I had planned and scheduled had to be changed. And I couldn’t take naps.
Lack of productivity this week means this weekend I’ll be working. I don’t know if that is a plus or a minus, because when the work is going well, it feels wonderful. Anyhoo — I told my husband I want him to take me out to dinner when I get things done.
Let’s all put on our jeans, walk in the park, sleep with the windows open, and take naps this weekend. Have a good one.
Oh my gosh, the jeans are a HUGE deal! This happened to me about 7 months ago, and it was so exciting. I found my first pair of jeans after not wearing them for three years by total complete accident. One day I had a perplexing desire to try on jeans, and even more perplexing, the ones I wanted to try on were a style I would never think I would like, and I instinctively picked up a bigger size than I’d ever worn before. And they just…worked. In a crazy way. Like they weren’t “jeans,” they were just great pants that look like jeans so the rest of the world thinks I’m dressed in a normal way, not in a “I mostly wear clothes that remind me of blankets” way. So yeah, I’m trying to say WOO HOO for finding some jeans easily.
hooray for your jeans! and concert!
and dissertation! and new home! woohoo for the good!
The Good:
The link in Havi’s Chicken “Sort of like this.”. Not only made MY day, but has my greyhound world a-buzz with awwww’s, oooh’s, and other ridiculous dogHead cooing. Thank you!
Another week closer to a certain to be fabulous family wedding! Can’t wait for this trip!
The Hard:
New gig still not a done deal. practicing patience.
New gig is about $ not <3 and mulling and shiva nata'ing over how to make $ on my <3 things
Tired. just. so. tired.
Jeans. Oh yes. My search continues.
The Hard:
Apparently I am getting good at handling hard things, so I’m getting more handed to me which makes me tired sometimes. And scared. And maybe weepy. But then I just keep going forward. Because really that’s all I can do.
The Good:
The hards hit less hard.
Good meetings about a presentation coming up. Excited to teach people new things that will help them.
Having set up good boundaries with clients, since some of them I need to say – the line is here.
Clean dishes and laundry.
Lots of veggies in the house.
Bills are paid.
Windows are open.
Progress on Bikini Roto progressing.
Yoga workshop tomorrow. Hips.
There is rum and fresh squeezed orange juice in the house.
Oh, yeah. Finding jeans that work in anything less than two dozen try-ons is a MIRACLE. I’ll drink to that.
This week’s hard:
– Other people’s mix-ups meant my planned afternoon off went *poof*. And it ended up being a beautiful, sunny afternoon, of the type that has been exceedingly rare this spring.
– I don’t think this &%^#ing rain is ever going to stop. I’ve got a zillion things to do out in the yard that I can’t do until we have a least three or four dry days in a row so I’m not up to my knees and elbows in mud. So frustrating.
This week’s good:
– The people with the mix-up are lovely clients and were very apologetic about making me do more than planned and offered to pay a rush fee.
– Got some movement on a project I’ve been stalled on for a very long time. Realized I had to just start *something* on it so I could wrap my head around it and recognize what other pieces I needed to go along with it.
– All this focus on flow over the last couple of years has gotten me through a mountain of work this week with zero panic.
Happy Friday, chickeneers!
I totally had a dream about Friday Chicken. Weirdness!
The Hard:
-Still sleeping like crap.
-Scale says I gained three pounds this month, after what I thought had been a really good month. Some of it is probably from muscle mass building up. But still, blegh.
-I’m behind! I’m always behind! The sky is falling! Monsters are running around and shouting! Eeeep!
-Lately, all the conversations between partner and me seem to be dancing the Awkward Turtle.
-Oh hello anxiety. I guess you didn’t just disappear into the night like I was hoping.
-Getting a diagnosis and treatment for my sleep issues is going to cost me some serious money, even with insurance. Grrr.
-So, there’s no chance of me being at Rally this July. Maybe November though.
-Car insurance crapola.
The Good:
+Found my tiara and wings. Metaphorically AND literally.
+I have figured out how to use Twitter, and it’s fun!
+Therapy session went well.
+Making progress on healing my sleep issues–got a referral and did a take-home Pulse OX test, which will now be analyzed to see if I need a sleep study.
+Massage yesterday. Aaaaaah.
+I’m now less behind on my internship hours.
+27 days in a row of not binging–a record for me.
+Green smoothies.
The Jean Genie is a sometimes fickle and elusive spirit, but when s/he does her thing for you…. Yes, Woo Hoo indeed!!! Love a great pair of jeans. Jean genies for everyone!!
Hard
– disconnection, not bad, but ANY level of it is still echo-y of the very bad sort these days
– driving… Driving has got to be one of the least sovereignty filled experiences going. (I’m sorry sir, I made a mistake which minorly inconvenienced you for all of three seconds really there is no need to gesture at me like that besides which i am female and what you are suggesting i’m doing is kind of patently absurd…..) swiftly followed by me getting stuck behind a twit who got confused at a very confusing intersection and just stopped dead so NOBODY could go and what do i start doing? Beep, beep, beeeep, beepitybeep…. er, yes… sorry about that, i was irritated and a bit worked up and Oh My Goodness How Hard Is Sovereign Driving???
– Little Lad has developed an understanding of his own power in the world. He has got the concept and the language now to say No, Don’t, I don’t want to and I’m not going to. And he has been. A LOT!! My sweet, compliant, easily guided/distracted, easy-going, cooperative boy has got spunk. This is GOOD, I know this, we are going through the ‘Terrible Twos’ a couple of years late at double intensity and it IS so important to be an independent person and I’m delighted about it, but Oh My It Is Very Very Different and Sudden!!! Habits! Being conscious! Being reminded with a Loud and Definite NO that I have not been conscious…. New.
– job uncertainty coming up again. Keeping my fingers crossed that something perfect comes up….
Good
+ Recoonection, deep and sweet. Aaaah
+ Little Lad is making progress in strides. So Many Words! So Much Staying Engaged and Not Vaguing Out. Expecting and demanding to be treated like a sovereign and independent being! Fair enough. Wow. xxxxxxxx
+ our OT and speech therapist are great. Really great. Also the whole process is utterly fascinating.
And other stuff, on both sides. Cluck!
Hooray for the jeans!
The Hard:
– Senioritis has struck in a major way. I only have 2 more classes plus 1 project to finish for the current class. And I have absolutely ZERO motivation to do anything.
– Absolutely no progress on the director position. And I’m not included in a meeting about the strategy to fill the position that will happen in a couple of weeks. Feeling used and left out. So much for saving the program from oblivion by working my ass off the past 16 months. Dark mood prevails…..
– 2 nights of waking up at 2am which despite finally getting back to sleep left me exhausted and horribly grumpy.
– OMG, the summer semester starts in 1 month and I need to revamp my course materials and move it to a new learning platform.
The Good:
+ Booked a massage for next Friday after being enticed by a 50% discount!
+ Chapter 2 of my dissertation came back with only 3 tiny changes!
+ Sunshine finally prevailed more days than not this week!
+ Only 13 weeks of doctoral classes remain – just 4 more weekends stuck in class on campus.
Hope everyone enjoys their weekend!
The hard…
– No money for a week! Well, a little bit of money, but not enough for anything other than essentials. Good thing I am pretty handy with pantry items 🙂
– We have to clean the house. Poo.
The Good
– I have crocheted! I have finished one blanket, onto the borders of a second, and started a third. Um. Crochet for the win? One day I hope to have a hobby that I don’t get obssessive about! Yay crochet! I keep buying yarn faster than I am using it. This is Not Good in a funny way! Yay yarn!
– A lot of my creativity has gone into crochet. But crochet also allows me processing time! How awesome is that?? So I have started work on two of my three writing projects! YAY!
– I went to a convention and had an absolute fun time! My heartsister was in my house for 2 whole weeks! We ROCKED OUT! 😀
– The cleaning has four pairs of eager hands to help. (Eager… gigglesnort)
– I am over the virus I had! Yay! I feel like conquering the world again! Yay! Kids back in school, things are falling back into the routines that love and nourish me, and allow me to be the awesome creative person that I can be! Yay!
Trying on jeans is on my top ten list of things I abhor. And I may never do it again, dammit!
Here goes with the chicken!
The Hard:
– Growing belief that everyone in the medical profession (a) chooses not to talk to patients and (b) chooses not to talk to one another, or to look at their freakin’ computer records.
– Mom had “gamma knife” procedure on her brain mets on Monday. Turns out there is no “knife” involved (which we only knew by doing research on the internet) and they bolt a huge headgear thing *into your skull* (no one thought to mention this to us prior to the procedure). Seems like something that ought to have been mentioned.
– The procedure that causes “absolutely no side effects” has had Mom in bed pretty much all week with head pain and horrible swelling that has moved from her forehead down her face. Again, something we could have been prepared for.
– I had an ultrasound to check out my ovaries and the tech had a poker face and wouldn’t let me see the screen of the machine, so now I’m convinced that I also have ovarian cancer. And of course my Dr. got the results but didn’t look at them yet….
– Met with the clinical trial people and it sounds like Mom won’t qualify for any because of the brain involvement, so that is a bummer.
– Was reminded once again that even though I think I’ve accepted that Mom has cancer and it seems to be “winning”, I somehow haven’t. Because when we get news like “you don’t qualify for clinical trials and you should get your affairs in order asap” I am shocked and surprised and sad all over again.
– Stomach bug kept me up all night and in bed all day. Not great when you’re supposed to be the caregiver.
– Major self-pity around the aforementioned stomach bug. I want someone to take care of me, apparently.
– Oh, need I mention that I got NOTHING DONE on my thing?
– This is the most I’ve written all week. No blog posts. I swore I wasn’t going to do that, but I did. Oh the monsters are having fun with this one.
The Good:
– Ummmmmm.
– Got the graduation announcements that I designed, and they are awesome.
– Got the graduation party plans settled and sent out a cute Evite. Yay me.
– Kept my self pity to myself.
– I LOVE THE CLINICAL TRIAL DOCTOR AND I ONLY WANT HER FROM NOW ON! This lady actually took an interest in my Mom and made her feel heard for the first time in this 2+ year nightmare. And she was lovingly realistic.
– Because we have to wait a month for MRI on brain, Mom has time to go to her house in Mexico, which is really all she wants to do 🙂 We leave Monday.
– Secret Play Date! Bedazzled Office Plan!
– Shiva Nata!
– Jin Shin keeping things moving….
– I got the ultra-sound taken care of.
Happy Weekend Fellow Chickeneers! Beautiful weather here in Colorado 🙂
xoxo
kim
The Good, The Bad, And the Ugly
Salutations!
I’ll need Chicken Amnesty for the bad joke of a title. 🙂
My most of my family hated that movie; it was too long and too boring. I, on the other hand, was fascinated by the imagery and how the film communicated so much with minimal dialogue; the film communicated mostly through composition.
The Good:
-I learned I can function relatively well on only 2 hours of sleep. I was surprised; I was more lucid than I expected.
-finished two rather decent portraits that I am happy with, though I’m not certain they are portfolio material
-finished a paper on Hanoverian Policy and Clausewitzian Friction. Very fascinating subject, and the professor seemed to find the unorthodox mixture compelling. Surprisingly fun to write. This spark of inspiration came at the last minute, as I was racking my brain, trying to figure out how to organize my evidence into a coherent argument.
-I just ran 5 miles in combat boots
The Bad:
-I had to function on only 2 hours of sleep
-It is surprisingly hard to come across as intelligent in conversation after only 2 hours of sleep
-Writing about Hanoverian policy and relating it with Clausewitzian theory is surprisingly difficult and unorthodox, yet surprisingly fun and compelling.
-surprisingly difficult to draw well on little sleep.
-this television show I am watching is very badly written and only watchable on mute; the costumes are beautifully done Victorian outfits with good atmosphere. Except the murder victim’s hair looks anachronistically un-Victorian; he looks too much like Fabio, presumably because this show was made in the early 1990s.
Fast forward to the 90s!
The Ugly
-Actually, my week was rather aesthetically pleasing, and not ugly.
Methinks I shall change this last category to “the aesthetically pleasing”
Feliz Cinco de Mayo!
Saturday chicken! And jeans that fit well, that were the first ones you tried one – awesome. And yays for everyones good, and hugs and kindness for the hard.
The hard:
– achey heart
– waking up at 3am yesterday, after 3 hours sleep
– social weirdness of various kinds at yesterday evenings shindig
– accidentally being really rude to someone who was being nice to me and who may have been a ‘useful’ person to know. Then walking around for half an hour wanting to shove my fist in my mouth.
The good:
– got my presentation done, and enjoyed it.
– Done most of my report, just a few wisps of tidying up left.
– big realisations – shedding what was disguising the thing
– got two sets of photos back and very pleased with them both
– ballet! So much fun, such a great teacher and she’s suggested I do contemporary dance too. Interesting possibility even if I choose not to do it.
– drinks with a favourite person on Thurs, and got to see her boyfriend too.
– despite weirdness, did have a good time last night and got to know some people a lot better and played pool very badly and hilariously
– lots of shiva nata and movement this week, just what I wanted
so yay, for this week!
Jeans – I am wearing my one and only pair that magically ended a very long involuntary jeans sabbatical a couple of years ago. Now I feel I could even do with a second one.
The hard:
– Stoopid cough still there. And everyone around is coughing too.
– 8 – 9 hours sleep every night and still tired.
– Feeling totally uncommunicative. Unplugging phone when I come home at night and yet feeling I want and need to catch up with so many people.
The good:
– Stoopid cough slightly better than last week.
– Sunshine.
– Asparagus and strawberries galore.
– Girls’ night out.
– Unplugging the phone every night.
– Very relaxed days at work.
Finding jeans that fit on the first try is so incredible it deserves a parade. I raise my glass in celebration of this marvelous event.
I avoided jeans for 20 years and then my daughter convinced me that the ones I wore in the 60’s and 70’s (stiff, bulky, unyielding, unflattering) were not the same now. She was so right – I hardly wear anything else now. Hooray for stretchy stuff they put in them! Congrats on finding a well-fitting pair.
Now for Poulet:
Hard:
The sinus infection with cough that made me sound tubercular. I felt like c–p.
My classroom group finally gelled in Feb. & Mar. and now they are unraveling, due to to so many children either making a transition out, or uncertain (because parents won’t commit)about what is next for them. Poor things, they are anxious, angry and clinging to old behaviors.
Many families will not acknowledge this stress on their children.
Anybody ever do shivanata with children?
The good:
Finally succumbed and went to the doctor. Antibiotics made a big difference and I seem to be getting better.
Some moments where I could remember myself and feel completely present – whoo!
Happy weekend!
Oh, Havi! How wonderful a thing it is to have jeans that fit. It has happened to me lately, as well. Massively healing, as I have years of ghastly memories (The 70s, The Poppy, Boulder, Colorado, augh, augh, AUGH) of trying desperately to fit into jeans so I could fit into the scene in junior high. Never happened.
But Judy’s daughter is so right! They’re making ’em better these days. It has also helped me to lose 30 pounds. And my inner Miss Slighcarp has some things to say about this, but the truth is, the best thing about losing 30 pounds is finding jeans that fit. The BEST.
So, the good! My Shiva Nata dvd came in the mail, and I am VERY EXCITED!
The hard: I have a situation about which I can no longer say I don’t need a lawyer to handle. But, the good of the hard is that I have a lawyer now.
Anyway, Shiva Nata! Very excited and will report back.
Well, I’m a day late, but better late than never (right?)
First off, having just taken my niece on a very un-fruitful jeans shopping trip, so many yays! for finding the perfect jeans on the first try! (This is huge, definitely not just in your head)
Also, I would like to join you in the epic not-having-our-eyes-dilated dork dance, if I may. Because this is truly epic and fabulous news!
So… this weeks hard;
* stressing a little over money, because I paid for a thing, and then I had to pay rent on the apartment I’m no longer living in… and then my online savings account wouldn’t let me transfer money until the end of the week, meaning it won’t arrive in my checking account until the beginning of next week(!!!). Which means I could possibly become overdrawn, and that brings up all sorts of monsters
* Seeing all sorts of online programs that totally set off my “I Want It! I Need It!” Monster
* Applying for a scholarship in one of those programs, and not getting it (thereby setting off my “Who Do You Think You Are? Someone Special?!” Monster)
* So much stuff to do!!! and of course, not nearly enough time/energy/brain power to do it… /sigh
But! The Good!!!
* Found out my co-worker is NOT going out of town when she thought she was, which freed me to go out of town, which meant I get to go to Rally (Rally!)
* I committed to posting on my blog every day this month, and so far, I have 😀
* I’ve gotten really positive feedback to my blog posts (though not many comments on the blog… note to self; remind FB friends to post on the blog!)
* My landlady hasn’t actually deposited the rent check yet, so I didn’t actually get overdrawn (yay!)
* Developing so much confidence and clarity towards my business, which also happens to be my life calling, so that’s a good thing 😉
* Life is just generally good right now!
hi all. yay on the good. hugs for the hard.
my chickens:
the hard:
-sooo busy right. no free mornings, therefore no long walks in the park with my hyperactive dog.
-hyper hyperactive dog. unhappy dog. unhappy garden as well.
-been interrogated by cagney and lacey about what i said about the ways of my boss.
-where did april go?
-my birthday next week. 34 years old. single, not moving to bolivia any time soon, and no gentleman friend in sight. and everyone seems to be looking at me as if i have a train to catch and i am totally late and in the wrong aisle for it.
-may will be hard. the whole month will be like this
the good:
-i still have my job, and things have been stirred up because of what i said. awesome. whatever the outcome, something happened.
-i am healthy and look younger than my “old spinster age”
-involved in great projects
-hopeful, i think.
happy chickening, mc fly style!
Obscene unproductivity here too!
The Good
-New to all this blog stuff, but wanting to jump in; I seem to have found my people
-Magic! I was walking around the lake clearing my mindwebs & pondering starting my own blog one of these days and thinking that I needed a business partner of my own, and wondering what form she should have; I love ducks, but obviously ducks are taken. Suddenly I thought of a turtle photo on a card I have that says “it has taken me all my life to get to where I am now” and I was like, yeah, a turtle is perfect. Magically, within two minutes of being shown the turtle vision, I happened upon about a dozen real turtles right there hanging out on logs near the lake shore. I love getting signs!
-My Shiva Nata DVD arrived!
The Bad
-Shoes!
-PTSD, Stuckification & Clutter
-Still at my corporate job: had to attend co-worker baby shower featuring the about-to-be-mother still blabbering about wishing she were having a boy instead of a girl. When that started six months ago, I dared hope she’d be wanted by now (the baby).
Happy Belated Chicken!
the hard:
-long week of early mornings
-unhappy-at-work husband
-really disturbing periods of idleness at work, HATE that
-low energy and lack of sobriety
-lost pateince at 4year old and got yelly, HATE that
the good:
-Shiva Nata DVd came! hooray! got thru 3 minutes of practice before i had to stop
-no epiphanies yet, but lots more patience with kids, and more clarity overall
-moving thru the todo list with alacrity, and doing those things on the list that have been hovering there for weeks
-spicy yellowtail roll!
-yard work and down time
Hello chickens!
The hard:
Semi-all-nighter to finish the big index. It took me several days to recover. This is not as easy at 51 as it was at 25.
Terrible headache and weird overheating symptoms for several days. Kind of scary till I figured out what (I think) it was.
No blog posts for a long time. Appearance of the It’s Too Late monster.
The good:
Good focused guitar/singing practice.
An incredible gig on Friday with loving supportive cheering audience, synergy with my duo partner, and nice tips!
Finished the big textbook index! Did my big push in a centered and non-panicked way. Earned a big hunk of money.
Stepped back from weird symptoms and realized they could be from experimental thyroid. Stopped taking it. Presto. Looking forward to checking in with the doctor tomorrow.
Figuring out chords with two of my favorite music people.
Played guitar with my friend to accompany my 90-woman chorus! Director liked it so much she asked us to do another song!
Started walking again. All of a sudden. Not sure why, just like I wasn’t sure why I wasn’t exercising.
Money is coming in again! What a relief!
Wow, I didn’t know this week had been so good!
Thanks, Havi!
I just couldn’t resist having another go at it.
The Hard:
-“Manos: Hands of Fate” (surprisingly amusing) Almost so bad it’s funny.
Almost.
🙂
The Good:
-Eating dinner with family, who’ve come back home for Mother’s Day
Oh my goddess, the biggest good (though confusing) was so gigantic that I didn’t even include it. The lost (adult) daughter has contacted us. Email conversations all week. She just called for mother’s day. We’re going to see her next week.
Huge and various emotions.
I totally needed a sovereignty reminder. I love how putting words on concepts makes stuff so much more understandable and therefore doable. Bravo Havi and other Fluent Self readers. We all kind of rock:)