In which I cover the good stuff and the hard stuff in my week, trying for the non-preachy, non-annoying side of ritual and self-reflection.
And you get to join in if you feel like it.
It’s Friday! That wasn’t unexpected at all.
Anyway, here we are. Let’s chicken.
The hard stuff
Dread!
I was so anxious about the Fourth of July and all my PTSD stuff coming up, what with all the explosions everywhere.
And it kind of incapacitated me until I figured out what to do with it.
Anxiety over the weekend. Not fun.
Plus everyone you meet asks you what your plans are for the holiday and you don’t want to actually SAY that you’re planning on hiding in the closet and sobbing, so it’s awkward.
Ahahahahaha, systems screw-ups again.
On the Fourth of July itself, I didn’t look at my calendar. Because it’s a holiday.
But apparently someone on my crew scheduled a client call for that day.
So I didn’t show up for it.
And then I felt awful about that. Gah. SYSTEMS! Just when you think you’ve sorted out the rough edges, there’s another rough edge in there somewhere.
Work. In. Progress.
Exhausted.
Spent most of my three day vacation napping.
A minor disappointment.
Have you ever had something in mind to try that you thought was going to be your favorite thing in the entire world?
And then you finally get a chance or make the time, and it turns out that it isn’t that great after all.
A small thing but there is grief there too.
Hotel had awful freakish warped fun house mirror.
In the room.
I now know what I will look like if I am ever to reach a state of “Wesley, get momma’s prying bar”. Simpsons: season 9, episode 17
It did not exactly enhance my vacation. Luckily the bathroom mirror was remarkably flattering, so I spent lots of time in there recovering.
Time off goes by too quickly.
I protest!
The good stuff
I was okay!
I used all my techniques. I prepared. I did Shiva Nata on it.
And it worked.
No Fourth of July falling apart this year, for the first time since coming back to the States (five years?).
And I was even able to watch the fireworks from a safe distance (resting in the grass in the dark).
And I DIDN’T CRY.
This is nothing short of outrageously miraculous.
Three entire days of vacation.
Bliss.
All the neat things about vacation.
Long hikes by the river.
Being tired, sweaty and covered in dust, but in a good way. And then climbing into the bath.
Eating tortilla chips while sitting on the balcony.
Not having plans.
Not caring about plans.
Encountering the disturbing word non-word “Poo-llution”. And then snickering the rest of the week.
Dance class every day!
Happy.
I saw lots of neat things on my holiday.
Like a marmot. On a golf course. Pretending to be a bunny. (Unsuccessfully.)
Also a coyote meandering across a highway with roadkill in its mouth.
Star-spangled-fingernails on an especially patriotic waitress.
I smelled elderberry flowers.
Basically, it was different than being at home. And that was kind of the point.
I wrote the Shiva Nata posts I’d wanted to!
Specifically this very important one about 10 Basic Principles (which are useful and valuable even if you’re not a shivanaut).
AND this one about how Shiva Nata is fractal and crazy and there is no such thing as running out of it. Also relevant for other things that you practice.
And … playing live at the meme beach house it’s the Fake Band of the Week!
My brother and I have this thing where we come up with ridiculous band names and then say in this really pretentious, knowing tone, “Oh, well, you know, it’s just one guy.”
This week’s band is one I heard about through Amna.
Sad Lumpy Routine
See them live if you get a chance. It’s supposed to be quite the show. Though, did you know? It’s actually just one guy.
That’s it for me …
And of course you can join in my Friday ritual right here in the comments if you feel like it.
Yes? Anything hard and/or good happen in your week?
And, as always, have a glorrrrrrrrrrrrious day, a restful weekend and a happy week to come. Shabbat shalom.
p.s. It’s okay if it’s not Friday anymore. There’s complete chicken amnesty — you can join in whenever (or not) and it’s no big deal.
Follow
Celebrating no Fourth of July falling-apart with you! Huzzah! And many, many appreciations for the awesome Shiva Nata posts, which have been inspiring my little mind no end.
For me, this was the week of THINGS! HAPPENING! Which is probably why I ended up going back to bed mid-morning yesterday and then proceeding to spend the entire rest of the day there.
The Hard
Patterns, showing up in stuckified ways.
Oh, hello hard. Old, crusty, difficult patterns that totally dredge up my stuff in super-big ways. Bleugh.
Noise!
There seems to have been so much of it this week. From two main sources: the digger outside the back of where we’re staying, and the cars (oh cars, how I hate you).
Cars, the existence of.
When did somebody make the choice that the noise pollution, the environmental pollution, the danger caused by cars was insignificant enough that all of urban life would be structured around them? Because I’m sure there’s a better way (in fact, the Belovedary and I came up with one: golf carts. Inner-city golf carts. That can’t go above 20mph. Combined with awesome public transport.)
WordPress hates me.
I believe this to be true. I can find no other reason for the suckiness I have endured simply trying to post a blogpost this week.
No bath!
I always miss having a bath when we don’t have one accessible, even though I don’t have them have them that often anyways. But no bath!! Wah!
The Good
Venues! Sparkly, gorgeous venues!
So there’s two venues I’m interested in running Shiva Nata & Play-with-yer-patterns workshops at here in my new hometown of Nelson. And they were both awesome. Not only the venues themselves – which were beautiful, one a historic house (which means pre-1900 here) and one a cosy, colourful yoga studio – but the people who run these places are just awesome. I am happy!
Ideas! Coming together!
Workshop ideas, Shiva Nata ideas, website ideas, unexpected future-ebook ideas, popping up like popcorn *pop* *pop*
Exploring routines project = super-interesting + insightful + growing & learning
My project for July (along with setting up Shiva Nata & Play-with-yer-patterns workshops and getting my new websites created and up, hahahaha) is all about my relationship to routine, particularly pertinent now that the Belovedary and I have finally ended our fourth-month holiday period and are settling back into ‘normal life’. Eight days in and it’s been all sorts of interesting.
Our local supermarket!
It looks like any old supermarket from the outside, but it turns out that it’s an independently-run store which specialises in organic and locally-produced products! But possibly the best thing about it is the music. What other supermarket do you know of where you can listen to a rousing Beethoven piece followed by acid jazz followed by a sea shanty-esque bit of folk, followed by ambient trance? Fresh Choice, I think I love you.
Walking along the river.
Oh, it is such a beautiful river, I cannot tell you! Gurgly and burbly and bubbling and dappling, with mossy banks and willow trees and swans! And it runs right through the city. I want to live in a house where the most obvious route into town is along the river. In fact, even if I don’t, I will still make walking along the river my route into town, because it is that good.
What I’d like from the coming week…
Ease & flow with website-y stuff. To bring more trust into the process, to take more breaks, to respect my capacity (or maybe to get better at recognising my capacity). Also, finding the perfect new home would be pretty sweet!
<3!
Hi Havi! Glad you survived 4th July.
I had an unusually tricksy week this week.
The hard:
Expected income failed to materialise, and an unexpected expense combined with that to put me out of pocket to the tune of £1700. Causing me to do my wounded wookie impression.
I sat down on Tuesday morning to record the last video for my upcoming ‘build youself a website’ e-course, and found that the latest WordPress update has changed the look of the admin area, and the default theme, thus neatly outdating the videos I’ve spent the past two months making.
Then I burnt my finger and couldn’t type.
Then I got insomnia.
Then I lost my embroidery needle (while sewing in the middle of the night because I couldn’t sleep).
And of course, that was the thing that tipped me over from ‘coping just fine’ into ‘Why, God, why?!’
Also, next week I have to go to the dentist and get two small fillings and one big one. 🙁
The good
The sudden loss of income prompted me to try and very quickly throw together two projects I’ve been meaning to start for a while. And as a result I’ve had some of that ‘pure joy of creating’ thing going on the last couple of days.
My clients continue to be awesome. Wonderful, fascinating people, doing wonderful, fascinating things.
Tomorrow I have a long dance private dance class with my dance buddy and our incredibly brilliant baroque teacher. Hurrah!
Next week is Harry week. Harry! We’re going to celebrate with a Harry marathon – all 7 movies over two days, followed by a trip to see the last one. My friend’s making chocolate frogs.
And considering that this week has been Challenging, I’m doing pretty well, and that is definitely something to be appreciated
Have to do this since I am here on time. I KNOW it doesn’t have to be a FRIDAY chicken, but it makes sense that it is. Thanks Havi.
The Hard
Bit of sadness bit of loneliness. It happens. It happened. Its over for now.
Not as much work progress as I would like. I plan to practice installing some unbreakable flood defences around my creative time. They will be big and strong and will keep out the tides of timesuck things.
Being on edge. We have a visitor this week and I am sort of on duty, waiting to entertain and to help and all that stuff. It’s uncomfortable, but it makes me realise that is just a slight exaggeration of what I am like all the time. Hurray! A new pattern to play with.
Talking about patterns. I have recognised a pattern about money which I thought was restricted to my home life but which I just realised in affecting my work as well. So it moves up the list of patterns to play with, which is good.
The good
The weather. Hot weekend. TIme on the beach. No need for coats. The weather forecast for the week was for showers with some sun and its really been sun with some showers. Great.
Long walks – we rolled down a big hill on Wednesday. It was really good fun.
Lots of laughs with bubbles and random dancing yesterday. My 12 year old is not as cool as he makes out. Yay!
Having a visitor to be a tourist with. WHY don’t we do this stuff at other times?
Happy weekend to all!
Congratulations on all that coping, Havi!
And oof, this week.
THE HARD
As always, money just seems to evaporate. In this case, into an unexpected vet bill for a poor sick puppy.
SO MUCH JUGGLING. I have way too many projects right now, and they’re all important!
Unexpected parental visits!
Sad husband is never fun. Sad husband is sad because a good friend of his is leaving town. So need to be extra supportive.
Trying to find a new part-time job to replace my existing second job, which sucks. Applied to a position that sounded perfect… but it turned out to be a fake CL scam.
Fell off a damn chair! When stupidly trying to climb on it. Hurt myself in surprising places.
THE GOOD
Learned a couple of really useful things about techniques that help me — like, dancing around keeps my hips from getting stiff and achy. And talking to myself out loud can be really useful! Who knew?
Overcame The Scary a couple of times — including the really big asking for help scary — and drew strength from it.
Coped with things using creativity, adaptability, and brazenness.
Had some really nice quiet times with my favorite people, including a couple of lovely evenings with the husband.
Parents are visiting tonight! Super surprised that I’m listing that under “good,” but for once I’m just really excited to see them.
What a week. Friday. Let’s chicken.
The hard:
-Being sick, tired, overworked and underpaid.
-Having someone I want to please ignore my stated boundaries, and not being able to do much about it because he actually had every right to do that. Feeling guilty for feeling frustrated.
-I was going to be Done With Stuff today but I am sick and slept late and now will not be Done With Stuff until Monday.
-I was also going to go to the beach this weekend. Not so much.
-The weather is most of what’s making me sick, and there’s no end in sight. I need to leave this state…
The good:
-Well lookie there, I only have three weeks left in this state! How about that. And the last one is a vacation week. Ha.
-When I was beyond-words sick yesterday I called a friend, who was very comforting. Exactly what I needed given that comfort food or even drink was not an option. Yay.
-I wanted to be Done, but this way I stand a chance of being done well, not just fast. And that’s important too.
-The beach will be more fun on a weekday and I’m still determined to make that happen.
-Everything is going to be fine.
Here’s hoping for a great weekend, chickeneers. Hugs all around!
Poo-llution LOL I am also twelve 🙂
Hard:
DS#2 had a total freakout meltdown on us Tuesday night.
Waiting.
Feeling flumpy from not getting to do yoga or walk Marty to work. Retaining water due to the high temperatures and humidity doesn’t help.
Stress is making my left eye twitch like Chief Inspector Dreyfus’ in the Pink Panther movies. It sounds funny, it’s funny in the movie, but this has gone on way too long.
Needing supplies to keep making the work I’m working on right now.
Didn’t sell anything at my Casa show, despite pricing to sell. Didn’t see any red dots on my work at the Parkersburg Art Center show yet either (though it’s up for one more week). Discouraged mouse.
My website has been down for over a week, being patient with the local company we use, and paying them for one more month, but definitely looking into a better alternative. This is money, people. Hard doing business with friends like this.
Good:
Got to go on a ride in the country yesterday because DH had a marketing gig (taking photos of gas stations for a market research company, not a job but pays the cable bill).
Getting confirmation that we are vending at Boogie on the Bricks next weekend.
Found an amazing deal on Chinese crystal beads at Crafts 2000 yesterday, bought a mess of them and came home and made 20 pair of earrings so far.
Crystal beads gave me an idea for how to unify the booth for next week. It’s going to be a circus. It’s going to be fun. There’s even going to be a “pick a duck for a prize” bowl. 😀
Funky robot notebook to write in.
Multicolored printer paper in blue-purple progression to make world domination plans and actually be able to implement them because I can organize them instead of them being in all these different notebooks.
LilyFest is this weekend!
Super-big yay for getting through the Fourth with minimal trauma, Havi. We have block-away neighbors who set off big (illegal) ones, and it freaks me out — and I love the fireworks, the boomier the better. I can’t even begin to imagine dealing with it all from your standpoint.
This week’s hard:
– Oy, the work! I love the work, the work is fun, but this week is the pinnacle of this season’s busyness. Get up, work, try to remember to eat something, work some more, do a bunch more work, maybe eat something else, work yet again, go to bed, with very few little tiny short exceptions for obligations I already had. Lather-rinse-repeat for the past two weeks straight.
– Skipped all walking and this morning’s yoga class because of the work. Guilt and frustration, because I really *want* to do those things, but these just. is. no. time. this. week.
– One of my gardens is horribly neglected and getting overgrown.
This week’s good:
– Skipping out on some of my regular routines has put me ahead of schedule on work as of this morning, and if I can continue to power through two more days, it will all be DONE.
– The Big Name Book I’m editing is funny. Really funny. Working on it has been a joy.
– Little yellow birds snacking on seeds on the flowers inches outside my kitchen window, not just once but twice this week. They’re delightful to watch.
Happy Friday, Chickeneers!
***The Hard***
– Work is draining me a lot. Actually this may be it for the hard, but I have a couple greys (which makes me think of aliens because they are called the greys 🙂 )
***The Grey***
– Buying a new car – awesome we did it with much success (got exactly what we’ve been looking for), but after fees we paid a bit more than we really wanted and now I have more debt. (only debt is actually mortgage + car + husband student loans, but debt should not just be an assumed fact of life)
– Biking. Is awesome. But I have a “saddle sore” and it hurts when I ride the bike.
***The Good***
– Training went well the beginning of the week. Exhaustion (and a late alarm) however means I am skipping todays run.
– Found out that I can apply directly to PhD programs and then go to grad school without student loan debt (Masters programs cost buku bucks, but PhD programs are free/pd for by fellowships, who knew?)
– Drew new comic episodes.
– Wrote some flash fiction.
– AugNo/CampNaNoWriMo is coming.
– Baby turkeys at the river because they are amazing. Also, I saw a rattlesnake, which was freaky, but then the turkeys eat them so life is good.
Chicken Little reporting for um, chicken?
Hard:
I have had a series of Chicken Little events all week long.
Lots of monsters wailing up and down that the sky is falling and there is no help for it. (this is not helpful by the way)
I did survive the holiday stuff and the holiday family stuff but it was still hard and bordered on anxiety attacking for a couple of days.
The unpacking and settling in isn’t finished yet (I know I just got in the door).
Figuring out what the next thing is and the monsters keep interrupting the process.
Working on deciding whether to attend the class reunion only to find out that reservations closed last week and didn’t even get an invite. More monsters.
And a hard that turned out good: I got stung twice by the same wasp on the same hand. I was washing mud off a tarp and grabbed it to flip over when I got it, didn’t see it until afterwards. But my GF grabbed some ice and some kind of sting aid cream and the stinging/swelling subsided in 20 minutes though the whole hand felt bruised the rest of the day. No lingering effects.
Other good:
My son came biking with me this week. We did 13 miles. It was awesome.
I found a finance recovery book that fits my risk and growth style and I have the skeleton of a plan started and working on it; as in executing it.
I had taken a writing sabbatical to make a clean break from my previous journalistic style; and to get back into a writing routine have started a Daily Writing Folder on my computer. The only should is to write at least a full page 5 days a week about whatever single topic is on my mind or heart that day.
I think that’s it for now. Off with my GF to ride a new trail he just opened (he builds bike trails).
Happy chickening.
My partner and I love making up band names and one sprouted spontaneously when I was teaching Kundalini yoga the other evening: Lead Banana.
🙂
Congratulations on the 4th of July breakthrough. I have not had mine yet…
There’s this one cafe I go to all the time and every time I go into the bathroom there I think Gah! I’m hideous. And this morning I realized that maybe, just maybe, it has bad lighting. And then the funhouse mirror story helped affirm. Thank you!
The hard:
-Wanting to want to do something but not wanting to and being sad about missing out on the benefits.
-Indecisiveness, on about 80 fronts.
-Hot!
-Intense frustration about a situation that felt impossibly stuck. (But isn’t! So onto the good.)
The good:
-Life-changingly great epiphanies sprinkling down.
-Conversations with friends.
-Sunny in the morning! Which reminded me that I am a morning person. Everything is better now.
-Going to see movies. Forgot how much I love this.
-Ideas, possibility.
-Meeting a fairy-godmother stranger at the right moment. Spooky.
THE BAD
A tough meeting concerning the future of a project I worked really hard on.
Scared of a meeting next week – also on a project I worked hard on
Too many people, and general overwhelm of work and expectations.
Realizing I feel cut off from the voice inside me that used to tell me what i want
THE GOOD
I set the date that i will scale back on my biggest non-work commitment
One day of finding and researching inspiring people and following the rabbit whole
One really wonderful dinner with fellow students and reveling in the a-ma-zing-ness that is sharing stories
I prepared a CV and cover letter that I like – surprisingly
PS
How does everyone make the bold letters?? 🙂
Friday Chicken! Now with extra typos! (Probably. I’m writing this on my phone, and the tinier type causes more frequent goofs. But hey, that’s okay. Reflection reflection reflection!)
Hard:
–Money anxiety. I have a feeling this is going to be a rough month.
–preparing for this weekend’s vacation/reunion/celebration of my parents’ golden anniversary has been sullied by feelings of “how can we afford this? What are we doing?”
–Monsters galore.
Good:
–now that we’re on our way, vacation is exciting and joyful. Ocean! I’m coming!
–I have been handling stress pretty well, actually. My monsters ha-ve been coloring –*and* inventing milkshakes. 🙂
–Practicing sovereignty.
–Ready for some R&R — reflection and re-invention.
Sad Lumpy Routine = LOL
thanks!!
And thank you so much for the SN posts. So good/mind bending.
The hard:
– waking up in the middle of the night last night and being kept awake for hours by agonising pain
– and resultantly feeling rubbish and drained and borderline non-functional today
– overwhelm and panic and trying to force ideas
– how hard it is not to drink socially, especially when I’m the person that’s changed, not my friends
The good:
– writing, getting it done, realisations about my novel – learning and growing
– yoga. This weeks it’s like I’m became aware of the gaps between my vetebrae and my ribs. A feeling of spaciousness.
– taking time to be kind to my body
– shiva nata and amazing ephiphanies
– walking on Beachy Head and taking an awesome photo
– finding the book I really wanted to read at the library, and then going to my favourite cafe and reading it with yummy food and peppermint tea. Lovely staff. Yay!
The time has come to check in.
The Hard:
The sads, I has them. On account of the missing, the regretting, the open heart that is feeling.
Still not at home in my body. You’d think after 39 years I’d have settled here.
The Good:
Growing my hair out, but getting hair cuts to make sure I like it the whole time it grows.
A dress! That I like. Even though I have to make modifications on account of the Rack of Doom. Attempting to make it a Rack of Inconspicuous Joy.
Settling of issues that have long been unsettled. A peace unlike what I’ve felt in years.
My yoga teachers.
My central air in this humidity.
Kale pesto. On shrimp pizza. Yes please.
The Hard
– Traveling, and new places.
– Plus the Fourth of July while traveling, meaning that everyone has to talk about how much I hate the fourth. (But at least I went to bed at nine and ignored the whole thing!)
– Hiding in bedrooms to avoid seeing people and not being very kind with myself about it.
– I lost all my friends! Two are in Europe until at least August. Another moved to New York and suddenly we had nothing to say to one another. Then last night the last one told me he needs two months off from talking to me.
– A lot of crying about the no friends thing.
The Good
– Giant bathtub at my gentleman friend’s house
– Meeting my gentleman friend’s family, this crazy band of Jewish New-Agers who raised him. I love their house. I love how much love there is. And kindness.
– My cat is alive! My housemates are more capable than my monsters thought they’d be.
– Crazy breakthrough with my expression of anger that broke my brain. In an awesome way.
– Shiva Nata in GF’s mother’s backyard with birds and sunshine and shade and fountain. I stayed out there until my arms gave out.
– Volunteering at the Oregon Humane Society is awesome! I’m surprisingly good at the socializing part of it (I am unsurprisingly awesome at the cat parts too), and I love seeing kitties go home with their new families.
Ooh, first chicken in a long time! To the chickening:
The Hard:
Just dropped my phone in the toilet. (I think it has a good chance of recovery)
Bus issues, psychological ones. again. This one bothers me bunches since it really restricts where I can go (I’m carless)
Not seeing the guy as much as I would like.
Right now, the apartment is a shambles. And, as such is making me a bit twitchy. And I can’t fix it until the new rug is completely flat.
The Good
I’m writing again! This is so awesome.
My West Coast trip is rapidly approaching and I am Excited!!! Excited!
I can see several things coming together.
Ahhh, the chicken. The week is over. Hooray. Would be even better if I didn’t have to work this weekend, but nonetheless, hooray.
So, yes, chicken.
The Hard:
-A variety of issues around my body and I not getting along so well just now. I really want us to be better friends, but we just don’t seem to be speaking the same language this week.
-Not getting enough sleep the past few days (which I am sure is contributing to aforementioned issues.) I’m touched that my cat missed me and is happy that I am home, but does she really have to wake me up every few hours so I can pet her and remind her that I love her? Also, nightmares. Really, really not a fan.
-The A/C conked out in the middle of the night Monday night. In San Antonio in July this is a Very Bad Thing.
The Good:
-Getting the A/C fixed was really pretty painless and quick. Hallelulia.
-Getting upgraded for the 7.5 hour redeye flight from Honolulu to Dallas. Squee!
-Home: husband, cat, comfy bed, breakfast tacos. I love home.
-A couple days to undo the worst of the jet lag – with napping!!! – before going back to work.
-Good stories. A new season of True Blood. Enjoying my current book group books. Also my re-read of A Song and Ice and Fire. And my rewatch of the Harry Potter movies in preparation for the last movie next weekend. What can I say? Stories are important to me.
May you all have weeks with naps and good stories and breakfast tacos – or whatever your personal equivalent is. 🙂
ohhhhfridaychicken on friday!
the hard: Mosquitoes! OMG where do they come from how can there be so many didn’t I just kill this one?
not very Buddhist or interdependent web of me. But there it is. I detest them. And there are more of them than the last generation can ever remember having.
cars: the difficulties of not having enough of them in the household. and of obtaining more. bah.
not getting to move around/stretch/exercise the way I want. Partly planning, partly other things. .sigh.
summer people: are finally here! yay! but/and them being here means that we all run around like we’ve lost our minds. My sweetie just worked from 3 AM to 7 PM nonstop.
this.is.problematic.
oh yeah. And I’m too unmotivated to make dinner for myself. Also? It would keep my sweetie up, and she’s finally in bed.
the good:
summer people are here! business is up! yay!
two new clients I adore.
paperwork for license filed.
client successes.
had a massage today!
cooler weather finally today.
reconnecting with friends.
getting to chicken on actual Friday.
go chickens!
@Hannah
For yer bold, you want to put this: before the word/words you want in bold, and then this at the end of the bit you want bold (the arrows and the ‘b’ need to be all squished together, I just typed them out like that so that they’ed show up in the comment).
So, typing hullo, Hannah! with everything appropriately squished together within the arrows would look like this: hullo, Hannah!
You can do the same trick for making italics, replacing the ‘b’ with an ‘i’.
Just in case this doesn’t show up correctly, here’s a link to a page that has them explained!
Hope that helps!
x
Gah, even spreading the arrows and the b apart didn’t work! Lucky I put that link in!
x
Cheers Chickeneers!
The Hard
-travel funk, culture shock, & jet lag
-waking up way too early
-asked to complete a project WHILE I’M ON VACATION
-awkward European bathing – bathtub with sprayer on short hose so I must take a shower sitting down – I’m constantly dropping things, spraying myself in the face, and drenching the room
The Good
-week 1 of a 4-week vacation
-no plans, no routine – just whatever I feel like doing
-beer, lots of it and it is good beer and cheap due to the exchange rate
-long walks of exploration
Hard:
* Gouging hole in my foot on corner of air vent cover that keeps doing that sort of thing to my feet. (Need to do something about that, but what?)
* Insufficient energy to contend with iguanas and albatrosses
* Itchies
* RTFM, still don’t know the answers
* Turning down multiple invites because homework + workwork = freakload to tend and tame
* I’m still hopeless at learning dance combinations
* Check supposedly in the mail hasn’t shown up. Grrr.
* Feeling worried about various peeps, not always with cause
* Contradictory sets of instructions re new class
* Glitchy ticket-ordering systems
Good:
* It’s not the right time to buy those tickets anyway
* Feeling useful at the farm. I like cleaning garlic.
* Zinnias
* Didn’t end up feeling humiliated in Chinese class in spite of missing past three sessions
* Chair-dance class was a one-shot drop-in try-it deal. Sparklepoints to me for the trying!
* Ripe cherry tomatoes; being encouraged to pick as many as I wanted. Totally kid-in-a-candy-store time. And tomato plants smell good, too.
* I think my fantasy tennis team actually managed to cling to third place in the league.
* My printer is so well-suited to me. It makes me very happy to have a machine that doesn’t require sacrificing goats or invoking demons before it generates the docs and scans I ask it to.
* At the moment, there is nothing that cannot wait until I get at least six hours of sleep.
So, to bed. Wishing everyone here the help you want, with both things that have been posted and those un- and not-yet-voiced.
PTSD totally sucks. YAY, Havi, for getting through the weekend. You are an inspiration.
The Hard:
All of my Stuff is up. Layers and layers of heartache and fear and sad.
Not knowing where we will live. Dog (human) drama, go away, please. I swear, some people do not have enough to do!
Constant worry about finances.
The Good:
When I find a safe place in the center of my heart, and I make room for me that is hurt and afraid and sad.
Always, my kind and gentle mare, my smart and silly puppy.
The Hard:
I’m a blog killer. I just looked back at the blogs I’ve subscribed to for the last two years and very few of them are still posting, and most of those that are still around have greatly reduced the number of posts, starting within a month of my subscription!
The Good:
The Fluent Self blog is still going strong. Thanks, Havi!
This must be a superpower; now how can I use it for good?
Chicken on not-Friday. So glad there’s space for chickening even when it’s not Friday.
The Hard:
-Still more anxiety than I would like. Can’t figure out the source. Sometimes I don’t think there is one.
-Feet still hurt a lot.
-Health insurance fights. From insurance I had at a job almost 2 years ago! Grrr. And procedures that were supposed to be covered and that are maybe not.
The Good:
+Quick little weekend get-aways 2 weekends in a row. Fun!
+Our lilies have *finally* come up. Took them a long time, but they’re lovely.
+So much garden produce.
+All that biting and itching has finally subsided.
+Taught an ESOL class recently, and I LOVED it. This is nothing short of amazing to be because I am often very conflicted about teaching (eg, worry that I have nothing to say that’s useful/interesting…the usual you’re-not-good-enough monster crap). But something keeps drawing me back…