Because it’s Friday AGAIN. And because traditions are important. In which I cover the good stuff and the hard stuff in my week, trying for the non-preachy, non-annoying side of self-reflection.
And you get to join in if you feel like it.
Oh, look. We’re almost at a whole year of Friday Chickens.
Which means that I’m sure to space out completely next week and not celebrate it at all.
So I need you guys to remind me. Stupid rituals. Grumble grumble. No, I love the chicken. It weirds me out that anyone reads it, but yeah, the chicken. It makes everything better.
The hard stuff
Feeling anxious.
Weird dreams. Vague worries.
Not cool.
Wondering what on earth I’m going to post about next week.
My plan for the “I’ll be away teaching at a writer’s retreat for over a week” was to write some posts ahead of time for the blog.
Hahahahahahahaha.
Now it’s here and I’m about to get on a plane and of course I have nothing. Bubkes.
I will most likely end up posting some journal notes from my latest mini-project, which has been working through some of the exercises in Barbara Sher’s book Wishcraft.
Or …
Who knows?
But it’s kind of been stressing me out. I don’t want advice on this, just sympathy. So please don’t say “just don’t post — you’re on vacation!” or “guest posts!” or whatever because I’m not so into that.
A horrifically long list of Things To Do.
And it’s actually worse than that because now it’s a horrifically long list of Things To Do That Will Not Be Done Until I Get Back.
Gah! Stupid lists!
Separation anxiety.
About to go six whole days without my gentleman friend. Aaaaaaaaaagh. Poor me.
I don’t want to talk about it.
The good stuff
My people rock.
Teaching is really fun when cool, interesting people show up.
Had a blast at the Habits Detective teleclass this week (a freebie thing that I do twice a year).
Great people (and about a hundred and fifty of them). Thoughtful questions. Good times.
Thanks, guys!
Summer in Portland.
Admittedly, it is way too hot for comfort.
But fresh blueberries and raspberries!
Dinner in the garden with Denise and her gentleman friend and the Hoppy House clan and also spectacular amounts of food.
Lots of help (and some really great helper mice).
There was sort of an unfair amount of hard this week.
But I also got a lot of really great help.
A genius coaching session from Carolyn about “being steady in my creative power” (yes, we’re huge hippies), a terrific massage, an amazing session from Hiro.
Plus Janet taught a class on mindful time management for my Kitchen Table program and I got all sorts of good stuff from that to work with.
Oh, the helper mice. They help. They really do.
Headed for Taos. Whooooo!
So in case you still have no idea what I’ve been talking about all chicken long, I’ll be teaching all next week at Jen Louden’s fabulous Writer’s Retreat.
Jen is a phenomenal teacher. It is such an honor to be joining her there. Plus writer me gets a chance to work on her scribblings.
Plus we will be destuckifying like crazy and I’ll be making mad Shivanauts of everyone there. Rock. On.
Basically, I am looking forward to every single part of this retreat and have been for ages.
Well, except for the missing-my-gentleman-friend part but he is going to come out and visit me in the middle and then fly back with me, so that works out too.
And … new at the meme beach house!
Yes, that’s a Stuism too.
My brother and I have this thing where we come up with ridiculous band names from things we happen to be talking about … and then say in this really pretentious, knowing tone, “Oh, well, you know, it’s just one guy.”
This week at the meme beach house it’s:
Punk By Association
Me: “He wasn’t really a punk. The people who he hung out with were though. So it’s more like … punk by association.”
Ez: “PBA? I love that band.”
Me: “Uh … it’s just one guy.”
Yes!
And … STUISMS of the week.
Stu is my paranoid McCarthy-ist voice-to-text software who delights in torturing me misunderstanding me. I can’t stand him.
Stu wasn’t that funny this week. Which is a good sign because it means either a. he’s actually working for a change or b. that I’m not using him as much.
A bit of both, actually.
Anyway, the gems from this week, including Stu’s acetyl Freudian slips.
- Joe’s kind on Stoddard instead of “just kind of stuttered”
- under a lap on instead of “Andrey Lappa”
- as sin as I fined instead of “as soon as I find”
- Have fun hashed eggs are instead of “how fun hashtags are”
That’s it for me …
And yes yes yes, of course you can join in my Friday ritual right here in the comments bit if you feel like it.
Yeah? Anything hard and/or good happen in your week?
And, as always, have a glorrrrrrrrrrrrious weekend. And a happy week to come.
Sounds like Punk by Association would be on a double bill with Naughty by Nature π
Enjoy your time in Taos! It sounds like a lot of fun.
The hard this week:
Vertigo. For some reason the vertigo I had three summers ago is back, and instead of being kind of random, it’s been going on for the past three days. Waking up when I roll over because I get dizzy has not been fun.
Finding out I accidentally went over the limit on one of my credit cards. :0 I did get online and pay it back down ASAP. Yay for internet.
Learning curve on the new glasses is not fun. I have to retrain my head to look with my eyes.
The good:
The new purses I’m designing are working out very well. So far I have two prototypes.
Izzy and I had a great day designing and starting a papier mache bird.
The sleeping weather has been awesome. I even had to turn off the fan last night.
New glasses. I can see the mid range for the first time in years. Yay for talking to people and actually seeing them!
That’s about it. If anyone needs me I’ll be in the studio. Have a great weekend, y’all!
The writer’s retreat sounds awesome. Wish I could be there. Have all the fun in the world while you’re there!
Here’s my Chicken: tricky week for me. Been feeling fragile and emotional and tired.
Hard: Still dealing with my friend who didn’t want to pay for the shirts she commissioned. The transaction is completed now and I’ve stopped arguing with myself about it. Still haven’t argued it with her, because I just don’t know what to say.
Feeling so, sooo tired. I get like that sometimes, and it doesn’t spook me as much as it used to, but I still live in fear of developing some chronic lie-in-bed-for-the-rest-of-your-life condition. It’s so hard to accept I’m too tired to do anything, and do nothing. I don’t want to do nothing! What if I never stop being tired? Aaargh!
Good: I really enjoyed Havi’s teleclass up to the point where I fell asleep (see above). It also sparked an idea for a new Thing I could do. A little Thing, fun and kind of useful. I’m working on this now.
Yoga. Still, basically, the best thing ever.
I’m finally really nearing completion of my previous Thing; a little e-booklet about being creative. Whee! Tell you all about it next week.
Havi, have a happy, creative, writerly, week with Jen in Taos! I’m sorry about your long, long list, and separation anxiety. Sending big loving hugs here ((((*))))
My hard this week:
Stalled on work projects: an audio download that I simply haven’t done; class outlines only semi-written.
My doctor upped the dosage on medication for hives. Makes my tummy feel very weird.
My good this week:
Much less itchy! π
Loved your Tuesday Habits Detective class, and wrote a blog post right after.
Walking on the beach in the clear, cool, early morning air, before the day heats up. Walking again in the evening, just before sunset.
Dinner and an entire evening with my son. Talked for hours, walked along the beach, had a wonderful, heart-filling visit together.
Have a beautiful week, everyone!
Love, Hiro
Hiya Havi
I think I may have missed something… (besides the Habits Detective teleclass itself!). You mentioned that a recording of the Habits Detective teleclass would be available? Where do I find that? (I got the original notification email with all the class details, but no follow up one about the recording).
Have a wonderful retreat, and *hugs* to you for the hard.
Have a great time in Taos! Totally understand the separation anxiety and endless todo lists. {{{{{Havi}}}}}
The hard:
– Having a kitty that is on borrowed time. Hyper alert to every change in eating, drinking, activity behaviors. Feeling helpless especially when she came back from the vet so very weak that she had difficulty walking.
– Incredibly overwhelmed with work. Desperately need an emergency vacation, but I don’t think I can string more than 2 days together before my doctoral program begins.
– Standing so much this week due to longer classes has caused a problem with my right foot to flare up again. It hurts with each step. It is throbbing right now as I sit and type. I doubt it is anything serious, just very annoying especially on top of everything else I have to deal with.
The good:
– Our kitty is back home with us! She’s made some progress this week and actually has come downstairs a few times. Means she is getting just a bit stronger. Trying to make the most of the time we have left with her.
– Another great session in the lab with my students. Really feel proud of what I was able to do to effect change in our curriculum to improve our student’s experience, even if my boss isn’t appreciative of my efforts (egos, insecurity and other crap are involved).
– Stayed away from the vending machines for 5 days. Still eating too much, but at least it is better quality.
– It is FRIDAY!!!! And I survived another week.
Havi – I hope you have a great time in Taos!
My hard:
– Sent out a build to a customer that missed a feature because it didn’t get assigned to me properly in issue tracking. Feeling dumb.
– Starting to worry about trip to Omaha in October. Realized the other day I don’t drive much anymore and so driving for 6 hours is going to be scary, even though I’ve done it before.
– Missed the Habits Detective Class due to last minute conflict. (I’m hoping there will be a recording too!)
– Mad because I am faithfully exercising and watching my diet and lost no weight this week. Grrrr.
My good:
– Approved for new insurance. Yay!
– Completed a project. Double Yay!
– Found out I only need to replace the furnace, not the furnace + A/C. Phew!
So I randomly Googled “Punk by Association” just because I was wondering if maybe they were a real band (or a real just-one-guy) — and this post is the number one result! Win!
Hug-like vibes @GadgetGirl. My Hard is similar…
Hard:
The family dog (Beta, a retired Greyhound) randomly wasn’t feeling well on Sunday. None of her symptoms were all *that* worrisome on their own, but combined it was a bit of a cause for concern. Monday, she was doing better but not full strength, so Tuesday my parents decided to take her to the vet. They figured that the vet would laugh in their faces for overreacting, but wanted to be on the safe side.
The vet did an MRI. Beta had cancer pretty much everywhere. She had to be put to sleep.
It’s still a sort of a shock, since she was (by all appearances) *fine* not even a week ago. While my brain is saying “She was sick and this was for the best”, my heart is saying “They took my dog away and I want her back!”
Good:
She only seemed to suffer for a day or two, which is nice.
Also, my wounds I mentioned last week are mostly healed, and it doesn’t look like there’s going to be any facial scarring. So, yay.
Also, my first wedding shower (the one my MIL is running…) is tomorrow. I fully expect that to be both Hard *and* Good, but I will let you know next week!
I hope Taos is wonderful ~ Someday I am coming to one of these retreats! Writing AND Dance of Shiva, oh my!
My hard and good are a little tangled up:
-Hard: Needing to make a few decisions and putting them off. Good: Remembering to use the “of course this is hard, it’s a big deal” procrastination dissolvomatic technique gives me a whole new open and gentle perspective.
-Hard: Still feeling kind of exposed with the blog thing. Good: Learning to trust myself little by little by little tiny baby steps.
-Hard: Going to a barbeque with a bunch of people I didn’t know and really didn’t want to attend. Good: chatting with someone great about possible collaboration.
Thank you for the habits teleclass this week – I really got so much out of it!
Good-felt the creative flow start again, felt inspired to post on my blog a couple of times, as well as on Twitter. Happily, having a bad pain week does not permanently affect my sense of humor.
Got lots of good help from my health care professionals.
Podiobooks!
Hard-have had 2 of the hardest weeks physically since I was diagnosed with fibro.
I hear you on the random anxiety, been experiencing that myself. I think I’ve been trying to ignore it in the vain hope that it’ll just go away. Gah.
Hard:
– Triple-digit temperatures all week, garden wilting (turning crisp, really)
– Bad sleep patterns. Yay for naps!
Good:
– My new tutoring client is great to work with and wants lots of hours per week.
– Broke through the 130-pound barrier. I haven’t been this skinny in decades. So happy!
– My art gallery opening reception is tomorrow and I don’t know what to wear! (It’s a good problem…)
Whooo! Fridayyyyyyyy!
Hey, guys.
@Jenny – sorry you’re having the hard. Yuck, fibro. Yay, cranky fibro girl is the funny. But still, yuck, fibro.
@Laura – Punk By Association! We’re #1 … by association! Awesome.
@Mags – let me check with my lovely worker-of-magic … I thought the recordings already went out, but will ask for you. π
Havi, have a brilliant time at the retreat. Actually I don’t need to tell you that, you’re obviously really stoked about it. And sorry about the hard stuff *hugs* especially the time away from your man (something I completely understand!)
Okay, so my chicken.
The Bad:
– Start of the week in Cardiff seeing some friends, which was great but very stressful. Ended up getting the train back early (which was very expensive).
– Been pretty stressed all week actually (especially today), not quite knowing for sure why nor how to get out of it.
– My arms have been aching like hell today, from over-exertion and stuff.
The Good:
– My Shiva starter kit came!
– Either it’s already started doing its job or I’ve had coincidental epiphanies from the Teleclass on Tuesday and blog archives. Had the biggest revelations about an hour ago, so feeling really positive right now.
– Went to a circuit training session on Wednesday which was great, if physically challenging (with a lingering aftertaste of muscle pain)
– Oh yeah, and I officially graduated too!
Here’s hoping for a fantastic week ahead for everyone!
Hugs all around for everybody’s hard; Hoorays all around for the good.
Extra hugs to Havi for both creating the space to do this, and to help her through what I call “Travel Mode” — too much to do before you leave, knowing you have to leave other things undone, anticipating missing a loved one, all the general travel “GAK!” stuff.
The Hard:
–Being revisited by some old habits and patterns around my weight and body image in association with the musical I’m doing. Feeling both “too old” and “not pretty enough” to be playing the part I’m playing. Feeling frustrated by “oh here’s those old tapes again.” Struggling to find compassion for myself here.
–Having a lot of stressful work to do at my corporate job; also being bummed that I’m still there and not further down the road on my corporate Escape.
The Good:
–I completed a major rewrite of the script for my one person show. Got a lot of help through Havi’s Personal Ad process, so yay for that! Feel really good about the progress and my playwriting mentor was very happy with the work too.
–I attended Naomi Dunford’s Summer Camp for Itty Bizes and got to experience her awesomeness while also feeling like I am making progress on my plans to get out of corporate America and go into business for myself. So yay for Naomi. And yay for me.
Yay for Chicken. Blessings to all for the week ahead.
Ooh, Taos! π
I completely understand the separation anxiety thing – my Gentleman Friend’s been away for thirteen days. Not that I’m counting. Of course.
The Hard:
– GERMS. I have an absent voice and a general lurgy which is making everything annoyingly difficult.
– The germs caused me to miss a job interview for a really cool summer job with my Right People.
– My Gentleman Friend has been away for almost 2 weeks and I WANT HIM BACK NOW PLEASE.
– My self-care has been kind of… lax… while my Gentleman Friend’s been away.
-The not-having-a-job thing is causing financial problems, and none of my usual creative endeavours are bringing in any cash. Stupid credit crunch.
The Good:
– My Gentleman Friend comes back tomorrow! I see him in less than 12 hours! YAY!
– Despite not making the interview, I have inexplicably GOT THE JOB!!! (The woman who is employing me used to have pink hair. I think that swung the deal.) π
– I had a creative idea today that received a lot of support from people whose opinions I value, and I think I might actually be able to make it work.
-This is the first time I’ve participated in the Chicken. I like it. π
Have a great weekend, everyone! π
Heh. Love Punk by Association… My friends and I used to do full bands and then come up with the titles for albums and songs. Case in point: Safety Orange Cat. Album: Black Holes have no Hair.. (yes, there’s a story. Maybe I’ll blog it someday.)
The Hard:
Tech issues when ordering the Shiva Nata kit.
Old Stuff regarding Finances and self-worth coming out in a big way.
Old Lady Cat still sick and arthritis-y, and probably will be. Arthritis is icky. I don’t wish it on her.
Misplaced bellydance prop sword. No sign of the new one I ordered.
The Good:
Shiva Nata kit tech issues fixed with the download (yay Marissa!). It should be on its way soon, if it isn’t now. π
Yoga classes are good for me. π
Found old sword this morning! (but still no sign of the new one… grrrr). At least I can teach my workshop next month!
New blog that isn’t stitch or dance related. I’m not ready to be VERY visible there yet… but it’s coming.
REALLY supportive husband! Love him to bits.
Taos! The retreat! Yay!
The hard:
-getting ready to leave for Taos; there was some kind of stuck around getting started on what I had to do to get ready
-spending a week and a half away from my gentleman friend
-still worrying a bit that I’ll be the one who won’t fit in at the retreat; yeah, my stuff showing up…
The good:
-realising there’s some kind of pattern going on regarding the stuck around getting ready for the trip; not yet too sure what it’s all about, but that’s a start
-being in Taos!
-knowing that the retreat starts soon! (and hoping my stuff will just as soon be proved wrong)
Now I must turn off the computer, go out, and explore Taos!
Oh, I forgot to add the extra extra good: getting to meet and hug you this Sunday, spending the week destuckifying like crazy, and taking my Shiva Nata practice up several notches!
Punk by Association should totally play a rockin’ weekend blowout at the meme beach house.
The hard:
– I’ve been waking up way too early this week. It’s throwing me off.
– Lots and lots and lots of stuff on my plate. Not quite sure how I’m going to get through the next two weeks.
– One of my husband’s good friends died in a freak accident; the funeral last Friday was very sad and hard. The whole situation is going to continue to be sad and hard for a while.
The good:
– My most favorite show to do is tomorrow, and I’m not as unprepared as I normally am with 16 hours to go until setup. And, they’re predicting rain, which means it will be perfect weather, because “they” are always wrong.
– What threatened to be a fruitless search for a new WordPress template when the old one stopped working after the upgrade turned out to be okay. I was able to find one I could work with and tweak it to do most of what I need it to do in the space of a morning. And I can live with it until I find a few more hours to tweak it a bit more.
– Cleveland Handmade’s TV appearance on the local morning show has finally been rescheduled for next Friday morning. Now I really have to figure out what to wear.
– Great Habits Detective class on Tuesday — thank you!
Hiya Havi!
Hope you have wondrous time in Taos!! Big hugs and love around the hard stuff.
My hard this week: Mainly centered around a major bout of the fear monster taking over my brain. Felt sad, scared, overwhelmed and all that kind of fun stuff over fear of making a decision, fear of making the wrong decision, fear of change, etc…So not fun.
My good this week: Things shifted. Hallelujah! Got some perspective on my fears, found some clarity around what I wanted/needed, got it out on paper and in conversation, feel a million times lighter.
Oh, and when I stopped worrying about food/diet/exercise and all that in the last two weeks. I lost weight. Go figure.
Funny how all this stuff works, isn’t it?
Have fun in Taos, and good luck with your List!
The Hard:
Having a bit of a “not good enough” bout this week, related to last week’s thrown shoes, social aspects of vacation, and general insecurity.
Feel like I’m coming down with something that isn’t quite materializing, leaving me headachey and bleh without any definite cause.
The Good:
Vacation was awesome! Got to see friends, hang out, visit the city, and I even managed to sell enough little doodles to pay for the parts that couldn’t go on plastic.
Managed everything on yesterday’s to-do list despite not feeling my best, and was pleasantly surprised to feel competent at all of it.
Slept a bajillion hours to make up for the debt accrued on vacation. Feeling better today than yesterday, so far. Covered in snuggly kitteh love.
Just a quiet week, not a lot going on in either column. But still more good than hard, which is awesome.
The Habits Detective call!!! SO amazing!!!! I wrote everything down.
YOU KNOW, I’ve been making flash cards of your techniques. So far:
– what to do when I’m feeling overwhelmed (list from call)
– letting go of the need for outside legitimacy
– I *have* started to let go some on Twitter. I used to censor myself and let go on Facebook only–you know, where no work-related contacts can read me
– an emergency calming technique
– another one, this one about the 5 pieces
– WEAR vs TEAR
– the “77 things that don’t totally suck” game
– 6 quick tips for dealing with uncomfortable situations
Super duper awesome.
I’ve had a rough week too. Super cold weather and *my* gentleman friend’s been gone!! I understand what you mean about separation anxiety… & also most def about not knowing what to do in a situation where you’re the only one who takes care of something and you didn’t prepare what you wanted to (I mean your blog).
But there has been so much positive that I will focus on that. Positive Positive Positive. I am very grateful.
THANK YOU again.
HAVI = LOVING AWESOME
P.S. Blog is almost up. Just need to [get someone to] fix some layout stuff first. YAY x 1000.
Taos sounds so absolutely dreamy right now…. man. I just know it will be great. enjoy π
chk chk chicken:
Hard:
I did not get a comic created and or posted like I said I would and really wanted to. boo. BIG stuck and I am still not sure what it is exactly.
Find myself thinking a lot about my relationship with my gentleman friend. I ended up having a dream where I just lost it and started yelling all the things that have been bothering me. woke up feeling awful about it. wondering if it was a Shiva Nata inspired dream and hoping not.
Money. not making enough, big debt payments,my gentleman friend makes big bucks now, and the uneven spreading of expenses is stressful to both of us. I feel like I owe him all the time and that makes home not feel like my home at all. ICK. Makes me want to go back to my own place so I can live within my means and he within his.
GOOD: yay!
I got my comic website switched over to something more user friendly and less intimidating.
Talked to my family and turns out the silence was just because everyone has been so busy with good things π
ate some fabulous food and drank very nice wine and enjoyed it very much.
started a girls night with two friends where we listen to the Sookie Stackhouse books on ‘tape’. Its a pretty big thing for me to hang out with just girls.. friends of my very own! loving that.
I hope everyone has a fantastic weekend!
@Laura G – sending you lots of hugs over the loss of your dog, Beta. That just doesn’t seem fair at all to lose her so quickly. π
@Laura G, oh, I’m so sorry. Losing a furry friend is SO hard. Allow yourself time to mourn Beta. (hug)
The hard: getting more migraines and really really tired, and wondering if the new drug is actually helping or not.
The good: my new store site is almost finished, so we should be able to go live in a few days. Also, I decided to start making jewelry again, and ordered a bunch of silver and gemstones and tools last weekend. The orders have been arriving, and the gemstones are so beautiful I could just weep! And I realized that unlike previous endeavors where I planned and thought and thought and planned before actually taking any action, this time I just jumped right in. Yay.
btw, what happened to the commentluv? I don’t see anyone’s last post.
Have a good time in Taos, Havi. From everything I’ve heard it sounds like such a cool place. Maybe I’ll get to go there some time.
.-= RiinΒ΄s last blog ..What is this "relax" of which you speak? =-.
Oh, never mind. My last blog post showed up.
.-= RiinΒ΄s last blog ..What is this "relax" of which you speak? =-.
Hard: Hand rehab. 5-lb weights? OK then, 2-lb. weights. Umm, no. Go out and buy 1-lb. weights.
Work stress, house stress.
Good: I’m an aunt for the first time!
I had time off from work!
I did this ridiculous overly-complicated multipart errand thing and walked over to the community college to find a lady’s office and return some keys to her. On the way there, I noticed a small blue sign and a winding path that disappeared behind some trees — I’d never seen it before. It was a *beautiful* peaceful public Japanese garden, really nicely designed, owned/maintained by the college . . and it’s three blocks away from my house. It’s been there since 2006 but I’d never known about it. Crazy symbolism!!
Friday I worked then went out with the Hippy Husband for “made it through my first week of work” celebratory drinks and then played pool and socialized with strangers, then came home and had a big, drunken crying session, so I’m doing the Chicken on Saturday.
Whew – what a long intro!
The hard:
– Residual stress over the long-term implications of my health issues; worry, sadness, and fear. Ick ick ick. It impacts every aspect of life and wears me down.
The good:
– Successfully completed a week of work. Though not an ideal job, it is easy and time flies. Plus, money is mow flowing in the better direction.
– My wonderful Hippy Husband, with whom I can be real and honest, and who is always there to hold me when I cry. And who understands that sometimes I cry for no apparent reason.
Have a wonderful week, everyone! Thank you all for sharing your lives in the Chicken. It really helps.
A movie about roller derby that uses a “find your tribe” theme…
http://cinemaverytasty.com/2009/07/15/find-your-tribe-with-whip-it-trailer/
It made me think of you.
Oh, and another book you might find interesting/useful is “Instant Healing” by Serge Kahili King.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
Because it was better late than never.
The Hard Stuff
-I lost my camera!!!!
-Have been trying to be more transparent about some things with my online friends and it has been really stressful and scary.
-My partner just discovered social media and is finding transparency to be a no brainer which has made me feel like a total coward and started some arguments because I feel so dragged out of my comfort zone.
-California’s economy is tanking so my tuition fees just went up
-The housing search is not going so well.
The Good Stuff
-The gentle nudge of my partner being my partner has allowed me to do a lot of self work in a short period of time.
-Vikings! The viking festival was beyond awesome and we’re planning to go back to the place it was held and do more hiking because it was so pretty.
-Been making some headway on things I was procrastinating on.
-Been learning more about Danish history. Learning new stuff rocks!
-Been connecting with other MFAers on Twitter
.-= The Living PoetΒ΄s last post … Invisible Readers =-.