I sincerely hope not.
That would suck.
Especially since I’m a vegetarian. Especially since tomorrow is the Friday Chicken and I’m certainly not sacrificing that one.
Okay. This is not really a post.
This is really more just a sustained kvetching session about how wrong everything is going.
Normally I would save that for Friday but this week has been so completely challenging that I really can’t wait that long. Yes, I am aware that Friday is tomorrow.
Anyway, I’m not sure that complaining is going to help. But it’s less bloody than the animal sacrifice solution. And if it doesn’t appease the gods, at least it might make me feel better.
So. The Catalogue of Woes. Yes, woes. Woes that are not fair not fair not fair!
Also known as the list of things that are making me cry and run to the Angel Refueling Station.
Also known as …
The list of things going horribly wrong in my business this week.
One word leads to complicated, expensive, hair-tearing mix-up.
One. Word.
A one-word mistake made months ago by someone who doesn’t work for me anymore pretty much took over my entire week.
The person coordinating my workshops accidentally wrote one person’s name instead of another person’s name in my itinerary. But we didn’t realize that this had been the mistake because there was already so much confusion.
So first there was a conversation like this:
Famous person who I totally admire: “So … are you staying with me at my hotel in Santa Fe?”
Me (looking at my itinerary): “Uh … it looks like I’m staying with [another famous person who I totally admire] in Albuquerque.
First admired famous person: “Oh, so you changed the original plans and didn’t tell me?”
Me: “Ohmygod! I didn’t even know there were original plans. All I know is what my assistants put into my itinerary. Uh-oh?”
Note: I mention the famous thing not so you will be all impressed, but because it’s somehow scarier to have people I want to work with and biggify with feel upset with me.
Anyway, eventually we got it sorted. But it took a crazy amount of time to have my people figure out what happened and of course I am the one who pays for that time.
Which sets off my internal “you know, if I’m going to have an emotional breakdown anyway, I could do this myself and be just as stressed out but at least not be throwing money away” stuff. Pattern. Ugh.
Hosting mix-up.
My hosting for a bunch of sites almost didn’t get renewed because of a ridiculous internal misunderstanding.
Panic.
Impossibly complicated tech problems.
I’m pretty sure Mount Hood is in retrograde again.
Or, as my gentleman friend theorized:
Maybe Hoppy House is directly in the center of some kind of technology-snarling vortex?
Quite possible.
About a hundred things going wrong with my Kitchen Table forum environment. All at the same time.
None of which the tech person can solve. Heads are so going to roll.
And of course the whole thing is made infinitely more complicated by various (and nefarious) communication problems.
Too many people working for me. Systems need work.
Looking at this week, it kind of seems like this:
I pay person one to bring a problem to person two who takes it to person three who shrugs his shoulders and says he can’t do anything about it.
Then I wonder why my staff costs are so high.
Yes, you are right. This is a stupid way to do things.
Not even sure how to describe this one.
My new phone has a built-in answering machine.
Keep in mind that I never answer phones and I don’t even know the number of my office line.
I give everyone my Google Voice number (the one on my contact page) and that forwards to my cell, which I also never answer. Genius, I know.
Then one of my assistants lets me know if there’s a message that’s important that she can’t take care of on her own. That — may it never happen — never happens.
The only time I turn on the volume on my office phone and set it to actually receive calls is when I’m expecting a call related to an appointment.
Anyway …
This particular phone with its stupid built-in answering machine takes messages from random people calling wrong numbers. And then it blinks red which drives me crazy because I am highly sensitive.
And then I have to put things on it so I don’t have to see the flashing.
And now? It randomly spits out messages. As in, I am sitting at my desk (which is a chaise lounge, so I’m actually on it) and out of flipping nowhere it starts playing my messages.
My irrelevant, pointless, spamtastic, not-for-me-anyway wrong number messages.
At inappropriate times. Of course.
Aaaaaaaaaaagh.
PMS.
I’m almost positive the chicken-sacrificing thing definitely doesn’t help with this one.
But the hormones? Not. Helping.
Okay. I’m done with my list. For now. I think.
I will just say (because Selma is very clear about wanting me to mention this) that no ducks were harmed in the writing of this extra-complain-ey post.
Also no chickens.
Finding the re-set button?
Some days you (and yes, when I say you, I mean me) are just kind of out of synch with the world yourself.
And pretty much all you (we) can do is to stop doing, and — as my friend Michael says — wait until you can catch the next wave.
Some things I try to make the wave-catching happen a little sooner:
- take a nap (big, crazy resistance to this one, but it pretty much always helps).
- ten minutes of Shiva Nata wackiness.
- forty-five minutes of Non-Sucky Yoga (the first fifteen are iffy).
- remind myself that I’m allowed to feel upset, frustrated, annoyed and anxious.
- write a long list of everything that’s going horribly wrong.*
*I’m not sure that posting it on your blog is what you’re supposed to do with it, but oh well — I definitely feel better now.
Extra-special Comment Zen
You know what I would LOVE today?
Some empathy.
Some tut-tut-ing.
Some “ohmygosh that sucks!”
That would be pure bliss.
“Poor you” is also acceptable, as are internet hugs.
Here’s what I really cannot handle right now:
Please please please do not tell me that things aren’t really “wrong” and that they are exactly as they should be.**
**That may or may not be true, but right now they feel wrong and that’s where I am, so if you could just meet me there please.
And definitely no implying that I should be feeling grateful for all the stuff that is good in my life. Oh, and you know what? Let’s just say no advice at all and leave it at that. Thanks!
Also, using the word “learning experience” in a way that does not express understanding of the awful irony involved? Noooooooooooo! Hmmm. Maybe I am getting better at this being specific thing.
Thanks for being with me today.
havi
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Aww poor thing. I know just how you feel. I wish you all the bliss I felt last night in my yoga class in your practice. *sigh* Yoga. Thanks for helping me get off my butt and do it by making it seem less scary.
HUUUGS! You poor thing. It’s awful when it seems like the whole world is working just to annoy you. Been in that head-space myself all too often over the last six months.
It sounds like you’re doing everything you can to catch that wave a little sooner. 🙂
G. Romillys last blog post..Needlework as Therapy
Here it comes:
{{{{{hugs}}}}}
Oh, sweetie, I’m so sorry. This sounds like a lot of snarly, difficult, awful stuff piling on you all at once.
Sending loads of love, empathy, and hugs.
Hiro
Hiro Bogas last blog post..Playing With Time
Hoo boy, I’ve had those days. Sending you virtual hugs, flowers and herbal tea. Or —
We could just set something symbolic on fire and dance around the flames like druids hopped up on double caf lattes and Dove bars.
Or we could just eat some Dove bars. You’re vegetarian, not vegan, so they may not be on your no-no list?
Anyway, I’m sorry you’re having an extra sucky day.
RhondaLs last blog post..Hunt Country Stable Tour, Day Two, Part 1
Cool! I can totally jump on the empathy wagon because hell – that sounds very, very sucky and gah! So hugs to you while you’re dealing with this and as far as I’m aware, if anyone’s allowed to say things are not 100% for them on their blog it’s a pirate queen.
So scary when things are all messed up in your life by other people, hard, hard, hard to deal with.
Oh goodness – more hugs for you, and a hot water bottle (if you need one) and a few furry cuddles from one of my kitties.
Wormys last blog post..I have a Dominatrix in my shoulder blades.
Yyyesh! That really sucks! Especially when technology seems to turn against you. I’ve definitely had a share of weird techy snarls. So yeah, it sucks. 🙁
Lots of hugs from all of us though. 🙂 Because we love you Havi! 😀
Nathalie Lussiers last blog post..13 Witchy Ways Green Smoothies Help You Feel Great All In Less Than 13 Minutes
Ack. Blech. Ugh. And eeerrrggghhhh!
I’m really sorry about all the suck stuff. I can totally see why it might be tempting to grab the nearest chicken.
Internet hugs. A hand-knitted bag filled with empathy. And an unflinching willingness to guard at the door to your Angel Refueling Station to make sure obnoxious, malfunctioning, flashy phones don’t invade your space.
And more internet hugs for good measure.
Oh Sweetie,
All that stuff sucks, sucks, sucks, sucks, SUCKS!!!! Screwed up communication with a biggified person who you totally respect? SO Hard! Made my skin crawl just reading about that!
ARRGGHHHH….. blinking, crazy making lights and answering machines that go off on their own… with irrelevant non messages…… just completely BAD and WRONG!!
Miscommunication…. NO… NO !!!!
Unsolvable Technological Problems …… AIEEEEEEEEE! *Stomping, wailing and much cursing soundtrack*
And all of this followed by a Wacky Hormone Chaser?????? It’s Just Not FAIR!!!
Poor, poor you! Hope your nap helps…. Sending you the biggest hugs EVER!!!
Chris
chris zydels last blog post..INTUITIVE PAINTING AS A JOURNEY INTO THE UNKNOWN
Sympathy forthcoming, but first: Hurray! It’s the Chicken come early! *weeps*
Oh, you poor thing. A phone that randomly starts talking nonsense at you? Really? I’m sorry, but I have to say, that’s almost funny in its perfect horror. Kind of like how having stitches removed by a blind nurse with no scissors is funny. Not really that funny in other words.
Also major sympathy with regards to the ‘upsetting admired internet famous person’ thing. I live in great fear of doing that. Because that’s horrible.
Also, internet hugs. I’m really not so much about the hugs, but, well, since I’m kind of blog-stalking you anyway (currently printing the newsletters at the start of your blog because they’re awesome) and you told Naomi I’m one of your favourites (which made me insanely happy btw), AND since you specifically asked for it, maybe it’ll be OK. Here goes:
*hug* I’m so sorry everything is miserable with you right now.
Haaah. That was cool. In fact, I now don’t feel quite so much need to chronicle everything that’s miserable with me at the moment; I can wait until tomorrow.
See you tomorrow, you poor soul.
*sneaks another hug*
Ugh, ugh, ugh! Sometimes it really does seem that the Reign of the Machines is upon us. I’m so, so sorry!
Sometimes at our house when it’s a day like that, we sit down and read “Alexander’s Terrible, Horrible, No-Good, Very Bad Day,” by Judith Viorst. Available in the children’s section of a library near you, and pretty entertaining, in a share-the-agony kind of way.
Sending thoughts of disentanglement, smoothness, and calm your way–like a well-ordered workbasket filled with balls of beautiful yarn.
Melyndas last blog post..Project Project Gutenberg: A is for Average Jones
Eeewww, blech. No single one rad person should have to deal with that in one week.
So boooo technology snafu, booooo pms, booooooo one word mishap, YAY Havi.
And also, as I was reading I was thinking, gosh I wish there was some way I could help. And I bet there are LOTS of other people out there wishing the very same thing. So *help & light & smooth serenity* to you.
Brianas last blog post..Shadow of the spotlight
oh poor havi! that sounds just terrible and yucky and no-fun and stuff-triggering and BLERG. poor you, indeed!
Havi–
That is just… poopy. What a yuck week for you! I’m glad to hear you’re running to (hiding in?) your refueling station. With that much yuck and energy suck, refueling is good…. mandatory even.
PS. Thank you for your blog comment. It really means a ton that you took the time in this busy/crazy/crappy week of yours to stop by. =)
quadrillion hugs and cups of tea as needed.
melissas last blog post..Walking Meditation
Oh you guys are the best. No exaggeration. If I wasn’t already bragging (I was) that my readers are smarter and kinder and generally way cooler than everyone else’s, I will be now (I am).
Seriously, thank you for the up-cheering. It is so so perfectly timed. Mwah!
That sounds awful, Havi. Separately any of those would be hair-tearing enough, but to have it all happen at the same time – I can only imagine how you must feel.
I wish you only the best, and am sending all of the love and good thoughts that I can.
Oh, Havi! I’m so sorry about the major infestation of suckage. I hope you’re clear of miscommunicating tech gremlins on the hormone-tossed seas in very short order.
{Hugs}
And may I add that for modeling their answering machine on HAL from 2001, that manufacturer would top my list of sacrifice candidates? There, I just did. 🙂
Havi,
Enjoy your honesty! Who is up 24/7?
Giulietta the Muse
Poor Havi, let the world offer you a bit of solace in exchange for all the good stuff you put out there.
Lucy x
Lucy1972s last blog post..The Changing Landscape
Oh, Havi. What a big, fat ball of yuck. I’m sorry you’re having all these difficulties. And the PMS on top of all that? That’s just adding insult to injury.
Mount Hood is in retrograde. That’s GOT to be it.
Sending you cyberhugs galore and wishing for the yuck to end post-haste!
Michelle Russells last blog post..Why Getting Things Wrong is Vital to Your Well-Being
learning experience *tränen lach* großartig.
yes, {{{hugs}}} all around (you and Selma, because she’s undoubtedly also upset by your upset! 🙂 )
gurukarm (@karma_musings)s last blog post..Prop 8, Gay Marriage, and Sikhs
*internet hugs*
You poor thing — it sounds like it’s been quite a week! I hope your gremlins get bored and go away as soon as possible, hun. ♥
Amy Crooks last blog post..Private Myths
Okay, that’s it. Everything that’s messing with Havi is on notice. You hear that, stuff-messing-with-Havi? ON NOTICE.
That should do it. 🙂 If it doesn’t, try some stoat-fu.
*HUGS*
Oh Havi, yuck. I think there’s something in retrograde for sure. Weirdness and frustration has been abounding lately. I’m glad you wrote now, instead of waiting! Sending you love and hope and comfort and wishes for ease and resolution, and lots of soothing in the meantime.
Wanted to thank you for this post … your instructions about the comment section and what you needed made me realize that I had been a terribly unsympathetic friend this morning to one of my friends.
Inspired by you, I wrote my friend and told her I sucked, that I’d been harsh, and that I hadn’t met her where she was and that I was sorry. Then I started over and thought about where she was. And, wrote her an email from that place with the intention of wishing her ease and comfort and resolution, and lots of soothing in the meantime, too.
@WriterSarahs last blog post..How to Make Time for Your Writing
Aw, man, gigantic yuk. Yuckorama, as my Little Dude likes to say.
Hope all the crappy stuff de-craps itself without a lot of work/brain damage/additional yuck on your part.
Sonia Simones last blog post..Social media & business talk TOMORROW (Tuesday 7/14)
Since I’ve only very recently learned that I do in fact enjoy hugs AND since this is my first post ever here AND since the answering machine thing would totally drive me nuts (seriously I bought a machine that has a flashing pale yellow light almost looks like firefly’s flashing in the night)
{{{{{{{{{{bearhug}}}}}}}}}} with an extra {{{squeeze}}} at the end.
Sorry if you couldn’t breathe there for a second.
Just as an FYI the phone is a Panasonic KX-TG2432 Digital.
LaShaes last blog post..All That Seems Random Fridays # 8 | Don’t "Buy" Stuff
@Sonia – Yuckorama! That is fantastic.
@Nancy – STOAT-FU! I can’t even tell you how happy that made me. Stoat-fu stoat-fu stoat-fu. Because what good is ass-kicking without the stoat-fu? Also, thanks for putting the stuff-messing-with-me on notice. Appreciated!
Stoats versus gremlins? I’m voting for the stoats.
You guys are so great!
Owee…
Some hugs and virtual chicken soup (see, there had to be some sort of chicken sacrifice for people to feel better! )
“This to shall pass” usually helps me keep going. GL
I’ll just add my hugs to the pile.
The misbehaving machines remind me of my favorite line about them… ‘Technology is great, when it works” When it doesn’t… big pain in the tushie.
Lizs last blog post..I need an audience! (and so do YOU!)
Oh, honey. It always seems that bad stuff comes in groupings, doesn’t it? It certainly seems that way in my life, too.
So, here’s me in my corner of the internet sending you some major loooooovvveeee. Hugs for Havi!
Abbys last blog post..Learning Lindy
Havi, when Jim Rohn talked about his Seasons of Life, it always made me feel better.
He reminded me that I’ll reap in the fall what I sow in the spring.
He reminded me that I can’t skip any of the seasons. Especially winter
He also reminded me that each season does end, and winters (like the one you’re in) end most gloriously. They end in spring. Spring is the time of opportunity and growth, when everything comes out and feels fresh again.
Life has sympathy for you: it will give you a spring season next. It will not keep you in winter forever.
All will be good again. Hopefully soon!
Jonathan Vaudreuils last blog post..Book Review: I Will Teach You To Be Rich
So sorry bout all the yucktastic happenings, Havi! Sending lots of love, soft hugs, and soft, cool sheets to nap in.
xox
leahs last blog post..All Art is a Self Portrait
To Havi and the loyal readers…
You might remember me from the other day – stuck about my thesis and being true to myself while I create and maintain my personal integrity. Guess what!! I’m UNSTUCK!!
With your encouragement and hugs, I sat face to face with my fog and pleaded with my helper figures to reveal themselves and HELP ME! I asked and they did. And it was scary and liberating and scary and invigorating and, yes… scary.
Long story short, here’s the magic my helpers and I cooked up. 1) I’ve ditched my thesis for a whole new project that is both interesting and relevant to MY work with the condition I won’t allow myself to wallow that I should have “manned up” and done this two years ago.
2) I’ve made a set of goals and paths for my small business that includes scary “out of my comfort zone” ideas that for the first time seem really doable AND fun.
3) I’ve promised my helpers not to be a stranger. They complained that they’ve been there the whole time just WAITING for me to let them do their work and feel worthwhile. Isn’t it amazing how people/things do their best work when we let them? 🙂
So, this isn’t really the “empathetic poor me” comment you asked for. However, I do hope the fact you are making a real difference to real people provides some comfort on this super-icky day. Thank you. (((((((HUGS)))))))))
What a horrible concatenation of tribulations!
Can I say clusterf**k on your blog? (Or cl*sterf*ck, maybe? Or clstrfck? Anyway. That.)
Have some more hugs (if you’re not already hugged out), and I hope everything goes away and fixes itself pronto.
Lean Ni Chuilleanains last blog post..Six Tips for Designing Knitting Patterns
Oh, *man* that really sucks!!!
I would have sacrificed humans by now (not only because I would have already sacrificed chickens, but because I wouldn’t–I’m vegan–and humans deserve it more, anyway).
I admire that you were able to get all that out and not use curse words! If I had written that it would be full of effings and “shit” and other types of uncouthness. Word.
So hugs to you and I hope all that crap goes away ASAP!!
Also, I take naps to get past crap quicker, too. Sometimes the crap lasts for daysss, but at least with napping they go by faster!
Also #2, I really freakin’ hate it when people call suffering a “learning experience.” And by the way, why do SO MANY damn people (even my ex-psychologist, ugh!!) say that? It’s irritating as f***. Now I’m getting all riled up.
My point is, lots of empathy your way. You are awesome. Things will improve soon.
*Virtual hugs*
You should sacrifice something chocolate. To your mouth.
Braden Russoms last blog post..Jaw, Meet Floor
On the bright side, there have appeared many excellent synonyms for “crappy” in these comments. I liked Leah’s “yucktastic” a lot.
And echoing those who HATE the “learning experience” or “everything turns out for the best” comments. A surefire way to trigger my homicidal tendencies. Which are, let’s face it, not that buried in the best of cases.
Sonia Simones last blog post..What’s Your Tribe’s Secret Language?
I’m so sorry you’re having a sucky week. Sending you and Selma lots of love and hugs.
Andis last blog post..Jello Necklaces and Polka Dots
What I love about this post is your relationship with phones because that’s me too.
A few weeks ago I ran into someone from high school who wanted to exchange numbers. I gave her mine, but then I felt compelled to explain if I didn’t get back to her right away, it wasn’t personal, I just don’t turn my cell on most days.
claires last blog post..Gettin’ My Groove On… (vol. iv)
Havi, I just had a similar goof not two hours after I wrote the earlier comment.
I have one of those mailboxes where I have things shipped (better than them languishing outside at my own home mailbox.)I don’t check it very often because I know my stuff is safe and sheltered there.
Anyway, toward the end of June, someone who I had wanted to make a good impression upon had offered to send me a DVD. I had forgotten about it, and July started marching through the days.
Then, I went to my mailbox place and found the long-awaiting DVD, which that very nice Biggification person had shipped promptly to me. Uh oh.
I had this sickening flash of, “oh geez … what have I done now?” It had been sitting there almost a month.
I did all I can do. I emailed her my thanks and added a condensed version of the above. Maybe that part was TMI. We’ll see how things work out.
RhondaLs last blog post..Hunt Country Stable Tour, Day Two, Part 1
Sounds like you got last week’s full moon in Leo AND nutty solar flares nastiness a week late. Will it never stop?!
I’m sooooo loving all the people that so clearly love the bejeezes out of you and Selma. I add my hug to the mix.
Shawn Tuttles last blog post..Aliens invade pizza parlor with help from local parakeet
I was feeling pretty bad because I woke up to “Don’t Stop Believing” (Journey*shudder*) playing in my head and when I walked out to feed my many fishes, I stepped bare-footed into fresh cat puke. EwEwEw. And I can’t hop around in disgust because one of my ankles still doesn’t work. Oh, the slapstick that is my life.
I’m pretty convinced the technology vortex is a like a weather system moving north, because it was here two weeks ago and took out both our main computers. Gah! I hope it moves out of Hoppy House very quickly, like a Texas thunderstorm.
Short story long (because that’s how I roll…:-):
HUGS HUGS HUGS – with lots of empathy and a solid “poor you!”
-case
Tech stuff drives me around the bend, too. That’s what happens when your mind isn’t linear…
Hope it all evens out soon. Otherwise, we’re clearly going to have to pitch in and buy you a pony.
(I really like your friend’s “just wait to catch the next wave” saying. Very nice.) It reminded me of . . . a former long-distance correspondent of mine (a former customer), an elderly man who had been a pilot for most of his life. He was in his 80s, and still volunteered at the nearby aeronautics museum — how great is that? Anyway, he always signed off his letters by writing “Blue skies.” I always thought this was so lovely! So: here’s wishing you blue skies.
sounds horrible horrible day
much sympathy and frida the cat sends purrs
re the sacrifice chicken thing
I used so ‘sacrifice small mammals’ but then became friends with a vegan so now I just ‘annoy small mammals’ instead
eg go up to a fox and tell them that the colour they are wearing is ‘So Last Year’ its very annoying for the fox but they get to live…
Oh sweetheart. What a horrible week. [epic massive hugs followed by more epic massive hugs plus TEA] Ow ow ow. Technology is evil sometimes, isn’t it? I hate when the gremlins come out to play and seem to be taking every opportunity they can find to fuck with you. It’s so annoying.
So are communication problems (UGH) and having to deal with stuff coming up from the past that you thought was at least in the past (double UGH).
Poor poor Havi. What a horrid week. Here, have more hugs and tea.
[hugs] [tea]
Lucy Viret (aka randomling)s last blog post..On the stories I tell myself.
Oh, I feel you. I handle a lot of technology related stuff and sometimes there are multiple client emergencies in a day. No fun for them or me either. I’d rather have my own stuff down than theirs, but that’s how it goes sometimes.
I am not a phone person either. I try to be, but it doesn’t work. Maybe one day.
Anyway, no advice from me, just empathy and hugs!! You’ve still got tomorrow and maybe it’ll be better. 🙂
Naomi Niless last blog post..Introducing BluePrint Balance.com
You guys!
@m – I must go immediately and find a fox to insult what he (she?) is wearing. That is way more mean/creative/clever than the whole sacrificial thing. Love it.
@amy – you totally cheered me up with your thesis story! I was wondering how that was going for you, so happy that you checked in. And so perfect because now I feel much better (as in, surely I do something other than whine all the time).
Big, big hugs and smooches to you hun! It doesn’t matter whether things are “big” or “important” to anybody else. If they’re stressing you out, they’re big and important to you.
Here’s a virtual blow-up clown for you to punch when you get frustrated. He’ll just keep smiling and bounce back up because THAT’S WHAT HE’S MADE FOR.
Sometimes I try to see if there’s a lesson I need to be learning from the things that happen, sometimes I can see that I’m gonna laugh about it later so I might as well start now, and sometimes the overwhelm is a great big tsunami wave thundering my way so the only thing I can do is paddle like crazy and prepare for an exciting surfing session. (Sometimes I cuss a blue streak until I run out of breath, words, or inspiration. Just sayin’…) Your mileage may vary.
(For the record, our last remaining vehicle threw one ball joint and broke an axle on the way to pickup up the youngest from summer school yesterday morning. The mechanic called about the other one and $1,200 later we have one running car and a rental, so we’re still going to see friends in their rental cabin in Tennessee.)
Just remember the old motto, “Whatever doesn’t kill you… is really, really irritating.”