Personal ads. They’re … personal! Very.
So my itty bitty personal ads made me realize that it’s time to make a regular practice of trying to feel okay asking for stuff.
Even when the asking thing feels weird and conflicted.
Ever since I posted the first one asking my perfect house to find me, which united me with Hoppy House, I have been a fan of the madness that is personal ads.
And now it’s my weekly ritual for clarity and remembering and stuff like that. Yay, ritual!
I am off hiding in the woods, as I sometimes do, visiting my wonderful uncle Svevo.
Time moves… not so much faster as differently here, and I am finding that each personal ad for this week has more to say than usual.
There were also some monsters that showed up, and needed some negotiating. This should be an interesting week.
Anyway, VPA! Let’s do it.
Thing 1: kids furniture
Here’s what I want:
We’re redoing the toy shop at the Playground and we need some child-size furnishings.
Mostly a few low wooden tables (round or rectangular), and maybe some play kitchen equipment too.
Ways this could work:
Maybe we’ll find something second-hand on Craigslist or around Portland.
Maybe one of my PDX blog readers has just the right thing in their basement or knows of just the right place to visit.
Or something could magically turn up.
Or there are other ideas I haven’t thought of that are going to find me. I’m receptive to many possible ways this could work.
My commitment.
To be willing to be surprised.
To remind myself that there are always more options than I’m aware of.
To draw messy crayon-pictures of how I want it to look.
To talk to the room itself and find out what it thinks, and bring it little presents of stickers and love.
Thing 2: a photographer of interiors
Here’s what I want:
We’re working on putting together a special website just for the Playground.
And of course we want to be able to post pictures of how beeeyootiful it looks, and the wondrous things that happen at Rally (Rally!).
Actually, I feel a little conflicted about this because the Playground is so unlike any other place in the world. And so much of its culture and personality and the experience of being there cannot really be captured on film.
But my hope is that we might find someone whose work can give a sense of the magic and the crazy and the fabulous.
Ideally this person:
- has experience shooting interiors
- will be excited about the Playground
- is in Portland or can/will be there soon
- will not feel hurt if we end up not using their photos for the site
Ways this could work:
You guys know people. And I know people and might remember someone who could do it.
Recommendations and suggestions welcome!
My commitment.
To stop and acknowledge all the new things happening at and with the Playground, and notice where I might be feeling uncertain about these changes.
To be joyful and appreciative about all the amazing help I have received and continue to receive.
To continue to love the Playground with all my heart.
Thing 3: Stowawayship Scholarship!
Here’s what I want:
You can still apply for the last Stowawayship Scholarship for the next Rally.
It goes from the evening of Monday the 24th through Friday the 28th (a full day longer than a regular Rally).
If you’ve wished for a Book of You, but your notes are disorganized and you don’t have time and you’re not sure how to set it up or if you’ll ever actually use it… this is the best thing in the entire world.
Though can totally come and not work on that at all — as always, you can projectize any project you like.
Ways this could work:
I’m telling you about it right now.
Deadline is Toozday!
My commitment.
To trust that the Sorting Hat will do its work.
Thing 4: support for Hiro’s new wonderful thing!
Here’s what I want:
Hiro is my sister-in-silliness and one of my bestest friends in the universe.
She has a new product called How to Rule Your World.
It is about sovereignty. Hiro knows more about this and how it works than anyone I know, she is a brilliant teacher, and her work has completely changed so much of what I do and how I do it.
My gwish is that this amazing body of work will find all of its right people with ease and grace.
Ways this could work:
I’m going to tell you about it and give you the link again.
My commitment.
To support Hiro in any way I can, because I love her.
And to celebrate the birth of this new and beautiful creation. Well done!
Progress report on past Very Personal Ads.
Just to update you on what’s happened since last time.
I did find a green cleaning person who came highly recommended. And along with that, I spent some time working on the part about being okay with doing this.
Still a bit anxious about this but progress has definitely been made.
As for stompy and colorful rainboots: thank you for all the excellent suggestions! I have procured a pair and they are stompy indeed.
And I wanted the right people for Crossing the Line, and it totally happened. Yay, Very Personal Ads!
Comment zen. Here’s what I’d love today.
- Your own personal ads, small or large. Things you’ve asked for. Or are asking for. Or would like to ask for. Or updates on last time!
Stuff I’d rather not have:
- The word “manifest”.
- To be told how I should be asking for things.
- To be judged, psychoanalyzed or given unsolicited advice.
Wishing love and good things for your Very Personal Ads! I’m so happy to have people doing this with me.
Follow
I’ve been so ready to plan this week that I started checking for this VPA session since Saturday my time… But the asks from last week were actually meant to run until this Tuesday, so I guess that’s what happened.
I used to have a play-kitchen and would love to play again; but I don’t have it anymore 🙁
THING ONE: Thursday is my weekend
Here’s what I want:
I’ve been working myself into the ground. It’s my own fault ish and also a conflict of stuff all at once. I’m eating my five-a-day, exercising and meditating where I can. However, I’m still not sleeping well and am currently fit to crying a lot.
Thursday is my day off and I’m leaving it 100% free. No one is invading it but me and my cuddly toys.
Except I’ve just remembered I said I’d go to yoga in the evening. Guess I should time this out for 5:30 then.
Ways this could work:
– Housemates could give me space.
– I could sleep well
– Lots of fresh fruit and vegetables
– Magic
My commitment.
– To put a little sign on my door for housemates asking them to give me space.
– If I don’t come up against too much fear, I could tell/ask them directly.
– To talk to the monsters
– To draw
– To write!
– To dance [the shiva]
THING TWO: A smooth real-weekend
Here’s what I want:
I’m seeing my other half Fri-Sun. There’s a lot of stuff we need to catch up with and some new systems I think need to be put in place during this time of our lives. I want their to be easy talking without too many [if any] misunderstandings. I want clear, concise, understanding and sympathetic, nonviolent communication.
I want him to understand that I love him.
Ways this could work:
– Housemates could give us space or we could go for a walk.
– Can make sure we talk when we’re clam, not hungry, too tired or while we’re trying to multitask.
– Magic
My commitment.
– To listen with an open heart to his suggestions
– To offer clarification if I think he’s misunderstood.
– To hug as much as possible
– To drink lots of tea and burn incense.
Have a wonderful week everyone!
Have a wonderful week everyone!
What I want:
Resolution.
Ways this could happen:
Answers from people. Kindness. Magic. My taking the next steps. Then the next ones. Telling some people I trust.
My commitment:
To believe in magic. To be graceful. To be grace. To take the next steps. To eat the frog. To Trust. To keep my head up, my eyes open, my frame locked. (oh, wait, that’s what I need to do to not mess up the dance with Johnny at the Shelldrake.)
What I want:
Whimsy.
Ways this could happen: I could act more whimsical. I could notice the whimsy around me.
My commitment: To seek out whimsy in all its hiding places.
What I want: a boyfriend. The super duper good kind.
Ways this could happen: a friend of a friend could know someone and introduce us, I could meet someone while I’m out somewhere having fun. Someone could say “I met the perfect guy for you!” The boys at EMS could be attracted to my BO and hat head and ask me out for a beer.
My commitment:
To continue to leave my house on a regular basis. To continue to put the word out to people that I’m looking for a super duper boyfriend. To buy new pants when these get too baggy.
Oh, I so wish I was going to be there sooner, because I would love to photograph your space! 🙂
This week I’m on travel, so my schedule is not up to me so much, and my stuff isn’t near me, there are allergens and chemicals in my hotel room, and my life is a little uprooted. Also….my throat feels terrrrrible. So here’s what I’m asking for:
What I Want #1: To treat myself well enough that I don’t get sicker.
Ways This Could Work: I could be sovereign (and grown-up) enough to know when to say “i’m sorry I don’t see you guys enough – but I need to go to bed early tonight.” I could drink water and eat veggies and take care of me (even though I feel like being childish and having ice cream and pizza).
My Commitment: To pay attention. To not slip into “woe is me” mode or “i deserve to have a break and eat junk” mode.
What I Want #2: To get started on this Shiva Nata Thing!
Ways this could work: Well, I already brought it with me, and I have laid the position sheet out. I could make sure to remember to do it when I get up in the morning, or right after work before we all go out for the night. (Like, tonight, that would be right now.)
My Commitment: To not make this into a bigger deal than it is (and therefore not excuse myself out of it). To realize that I *do* have 10-15 minutes each day and there is nothing about a sore throat that prevents me from doing shiva nata. 🙂 To enjoy it! To feel frisky and curious and playful when I do it.
Havi, sweet friend, thank you for including me in your VPAs this week!
Love, Hiro
Yay Very Personal Ads! Hiding in the woods sound fabulous. I am determined to go camping this year!
Thing 1
What I want: To finish my cookbook!
Ways it could work: I could do it all today! Today and Thursday! It took 3 days to get to this point, no reason why it couldn’t take 2 days to finish to first draft!
My committment: Do the work and trust the universe, and let it take the time it needs to completion.
Thing 2
What I want: To regain that crazy fertile creative flurry I had a week ago
Ways it could work: Tomorrow (or perhaps tonight, it is Toozday here in Perth) I am doing to *dance* my issues. I’ve been drawing them, and now I am healed enough from my hernia op that I am going to use movement to look into the issues that stop me from overflowing with awesomeness. They are small issues, which brings me joy.
My committment: My committment is to do the dance, do the work, and let the creative energy flow. I am a conduit to it; not a possessor.
So, here goes.
What I want:
-a round-trip ticket to Lahore, Pakistan that is under $3,000.00 (and the farther under, the better).
Ways this could work:
-My Pakistani friends on Facebook (or someone on this blog) could know of a great ticket source or tips on where it’s least expensive to travel from
-I might find a great website or travel agency to help me out on this
-Something wonderful could catch my attention.
My committment:
-to keep frolicking on the discount travel and airline websites
-to go to the student travel agency near my university
-to ask for help in the form of advice/suggestions–please consider yourselves officially asked for advice if you know of any cheap ways to get to Pakistan in the spring. 🙂
My other commitment:
-I forgot to add (and it bears reminding myself) that I will pay attention for something wonderful to show up
i was looking forward to VPAing, since i have a lot to be grateful for
-News from the man!! yay! now should be moving on to a different VPA on that
-going to the beach i need to go to at least once a year. that may be happening this weekend. i got a surprise free weekend!!
-clarity and time to finish 2 projects. one done! and i am really happy with it. and another that had been sleeping in my heart for a bit kind of popped up, and wants some atention. it has a great base of support i didn’t know about. becoause i never told anyone about it ;P
-the stuff… none is home yet, but will be having the money to buy it shortly, yay!
-trusting my intuition… slowly, but was proven it has all clearer than i do, so i am trusting more… sorry, i am the need proof sort of gal
-the smoking, well, slowly…
Thank you Havi for the space to do this, safely, and lovingly, and thank you all VPAers
This week’s VPAs
thing#1: way of connecting with the man
ways: magic! he could see me and my light. i can be sweeter in what i say, and kinder
faith and love his way
commitment: open my heart and trust, sing, take care of my light so when the time comes, because it will, he can see it and we can make a connection
thing#2: movement in my sweet little thing.
ways:have time, have personal trainers that encourage me, my computer could be faster and not so grumpy…or the new one can get home
commitment: write love letters to it, draw it, write about it, share it with people that want to be part of it. not neglect the real tangible things i am working on, so there is no guilt in dreaming.
love to all of you.
What I want:
For everyone to have a chance to rally at the playground because my time there was so transformative. A world in which more people know how to play and rally is what we need!!! And these people need to know each other.
Ways this could work:
I could keep telling people about it. (I haven’t stopped!)
My Commitment:
To continue the work I began at the rally
To find ways to bring the rally experience into my work and my office
To keep saying “rally!”
Of course I want to come to another rally again soon but I will save that for a VPA closer to when this could actually happen. But it is a major GWISH! (can gwishes be major?)
VPA #21
Update on last week:
I wanted an end to my self-destruction. I got it. Somehow, everything Havi teaches just got up and snapped into place. Hallelujah.
I also wanted a way to make money that was easy for me. What I got was my Thing. Hoorah!
This week!:
Thing 1: Ease and Rest
What I would like: For my new rituals to stick and flow and allow me to do this new thing without burning out.
Ways this could happen:
I could stay in the process.
I could make sure the Book of Me is with me so I can take notes.
I can observe my boundaries and make sure they allow me space and time to rest.
Shiva Nata for attentiveness.
My commitment:
To do.
To not become self-violent if I’m not perfect.
To keep Looking and Listening and Talking.
To ask for space when I need it.
Oh I can just see the perfect wooden retro kitchen set. And one of my friends is moving to Portland this week, so I will have a place to stay when I come to the Playground, hooray!
And while checking one of my places where I know realistic fake food can be procured I found the coolest realistic fake foot. It amused me (Nasco.com an art supply place for schools, so much cool stuff)
Last week I believe I asked for sovereignty, though I didn’t word it that way. It’s coming along. I started my new blog and realized my intention/purpose for it and am seeing lots of ways I can grow my thing that don’t freak me out. Which makes me incredibly happy.
This week:
I gwish Marty passes his first CPA exam with flying colors. (he takes it Wednesday. all good thoughts, mojo and numfar’s dance of good CPA juju greatly appreciated). My commitment is to stay calm and supportive. And bake some cookies. He likes cookies. Oh, and to not feed him falafel or anything equally as fibery for dinner tomorrow night.
I gwish that my idea of starting a cottage business with my handbags and accessories finds a receptive audience with the local small business incubator. I see something similar to what Natalie Chanin has done with her Alabama Chanin company. I love the idea of being able to help other stay at home people who may have to be care takers to support themselves and their families. And not killing myself trying to do it all myself. Win win 🙂 My commitment is to follow my instincts and be patient and let it unfold in its own time.
I gwish that my fledgling blog and helper mouse practice finds its right people. My old blog was all about how cool I was. This one is about how cool they can be, and how much fun it can be to get there. 🙂
My VPA from last week stands, as does the mystery of how it will all work. Although it *is* working. But still. I’m a little anxious.
My commitment: I will play and approach this with love and trust, realizing I’m here to do good work, so the faerie elfin types will continue to be helpful in their mysterious ways.
Also: THREE CHEERS FOR HIRO. I, too, hope her sovereignty thing winds up in exactly the right hands. So, what Havi said.
In the hard… I need a desk/workspace. This business of doing all of my computer work on my bed is just really not working out. I want a big comfy chair in which I can cross my legs, lay out paperwork, lean back and daydream out the window etc. I also want a desk low enough that it fits with this super-duper comfy chair. Or you know, it could roll toward me somehow or be lowered up and down. Not sure yet.
Ways this could work:
– I could start looking for furniture on craigslist
– I could make my couch a better option than my bed and only work on procuring a cool couch desk.
– I could make my *actual* office the cool place to do work (but I doubt it).
– I could incorporate more movement breaks throughout the day so that even when I work on my bed, I don’t end up killing my hips and slouching over for hours at a time
My commitment:
– To actually start looking
– To start setting aside funds for the perfect thing
– To bring curiosity and play into the experiment of finding my perfect work area setup
In the soft: I want to feel a big shift in where my projects stand in the next week. I’m working more consistently and with greater focus recently and I still feel like I’m treading water. I want to feel like I’ve really accomplished big things by the end of the week.
Ways This Could Work:
– I could prioritize a couple of big things
– I could keep plugging away at all the tiny steps in the big projects
– I could chicken a couple of iguanas
– I could go to Secret Playdate and see if that increases my momentum like it did last week
My commitment:
– to pay attention to the stuck when it happens
– to have real rest time and not just flitting back and forth between work and rest throughout the day
– to be gentle with myself regardless
@seagirl: To keep my head up, my eyes open, my frame locked. Love it!!!
What I want #1: To keep moving through the piles of iguanas without being overwhelmed. I don’t know though—they’re not exactly iguanas, because they’re all things I want to do. It’s more like piles of…wriggly cute puppies. Large piles. All licking my face at the same time.
How this could work: I could focus on one puppy at a time and the others would wait patiently. I could use my new next-step-on-each-project list.
My commitment: To decide what to do consciously in each moment.
What I want #2: For a medical thing to not be serious and heal right up.
How this could work: Things are not like they were during the earlier crisis, so it could really heal right up.
My commitment: To keep paying attention to it instead of hiding.
Report on last week’s VPAs:
I got well!! I wonder if it’s a coincidence that it happened right after I changed the “get well” VPA to “give my body what it needs.” Hmm.
I consulted with my teleclass-giver expert friend and found out that I already know how to do most of what she told me. And the advice she gave me filled in my holes perfectly. I’m going to be able to do this (teach over the phone).
My VPA :
I really want to sleep better and get a more energized day, be able to function more quickly in the morning and get back into my yoga routine.
I’m exhauted after some difficult months and a flu.
How this could work : keeping eating well, fruit and veg, start by tiny bits of action, maybe walking. putting reminders on the kettle and the computer so I *think* of yoga when I start the day, and not remember after my breakfast.
My commitment : allow myself to take my time> sit for 5mn and connect with my body, even if I don’t feel like doing yoga or sport, allocate that time to listen to my body and try to talk to my monsters. Their still playing hide and seek, and I can only only see them in a glimpse.
I am pondering: when did it get to be Tuesday?
VPA:
I didn’t think I had an ask this week, but I do. I am looking for two electronic tools – first to manage a to-do list sort of thing.
The to-do list has move items around between days and be accessible. It has to be more graphic than have a high capability to deal with text. Smart phone technology does not work for me – it has to be web-based with a downloadable component (since I go off the grid periodically.)
How this could work: google searches, recommendations
My commitment: not to dismiss an idea because the person who suggests it is a dork. (ahem. I hate admitting that on-line but there it is. If the person suggesting a tool is not particularly organized, it does not mean the tool doesn’t work.)
Thing/tool two: I’m looking to maintain a gratitude list (3 things, every day, that I’m grateful for.) I’d like to keep this on-line as well.
How this could work: a twitter hash tag, google searches, recommendations, it could find me
My commitment: keep looking and trying new ideas
Happy Tuesday!
I want to let go of the HARD.
I suspect myself of going for the HARD.
I want ease and flow and something happening in just the right time.
I’ve had an inkling that this is possible – the first person who came to look at my spare room took it!
I want to spread the word about my teaching in an organic way where I’m not feeling frantic / my worthiness is dependent on people signing up/ or I’m underselling myself and my skills
Yay! VPA day. I know I could do them by myself, but this feels better.
What I’d like: A duvet cover that doesn’t show wear or cat hair. Because looking at the (not so) white one we have now makes me sad.
How this could work: Don’t know. Basically, just putting this ou here. Someday I’ll have time to shop for one, but I hope if I put it here the universe will take it off my todo list before I have time to.
My commitment: Just to be clear about where and what I’d like to see change.
#2 What I’d like: A snazzy looking website. possibly with custom graphics. EASILY. Discovered that building a website is NOT like putting together lego, even if you are using wordpress. Feel discouraged and stuck because I want a site so that I can launch a bunch of other stuff.
How this could work: I could discover that I was only thrown off by the vocabulary and realize that with line-by-line translation, I can put it together like lego OR
Somebody with talents in that arena could offer to trade for BodyTalks or even webcopy. Or testimonials. Or an (extended) payment plan.OR
I might meet somebody in my social circle who can give me advice 0R
The universe can surprise me.
My commitment: To take my ego out of the equation. To be open to surprises and possibilities. To put in the work. To be grateful.
That is all!
Last week, I believe I asked for circumstances surrounding my car accident to be resolved as smoothly as possible. So far, so good: my car is being cared for in an excellent body shop, my insurance should pay for most (not all, but most) of the damage without increasing my rates, and I have the use of my sweetie’s pick-up truck. Situation: tolerable.
This week is off to a weird start, what with one thing and another.
What I want: An expanded sense of possibility. I’m tired of feeling stuck in certain areas of my life, and I’d love to be able to wave my magic wand, sprinkle some stardust around, and shake things up a bit.
How this can happen: I’d like to make better use of the time I spend daydreaming about alternate lives, by spending at least some of it daydreaming about more subtle (but significant) shifts in the life I am currently living. Also, I’d like to ask myself questions in more open and curious ways — not so much, “Oh, but how could that ever be possible?” and more like, “How might that be possible?”
My commitment: To do at least one thing differently every day, at least for a while. To experiment. To play. To explore.
Happy hiding, Havi!
My brain came back pretty well. I asked one person to help me promote my new product. I worked on the sales page for my new product and felt more excited about it and more ready to ask more people to help.
#1 Trip to Tucson this week
What I want: Joy and bliss and aliveness for my time in Tucson
Ways this could work: I could decide that it’s not in my control and enjoy the ride. The training could turn out to be perfect and profound and exactly what I need right now. I could set a strong clear intention of what I want and notice how that unfolds. I could go for early morning walks to the waterfall, and the trails I haven’t explored yet. I could order a horchata colada at the Flying V bar. I could bring my journal and poetry so I can feed my soul whether or not the training turns out awesome or not. I could be vulnerable and really present. I could trust that it will all work out. I could invite wild visions and new insights.
My commitment: Write my intention for this trip on the plane or sooner. Remember that other people feel shy too and get curious about the other people in the training.
#2 Life is Easy
What I want: Easy rhythm and order in our life at home
Ways this could work: Stick with our family evening schedule. Get Jasper to bed on time. Pick one thing to make nicer each day. Go to bed earlier. Move my body because it makes my brain and heart work better. My son feeling secure and confident and cooperative. My husband feeling good.
My commitment: Move my body more.
#3 I am loved and supported
What I want: To feel ok asking more beloved colleagues and even people I don’t know yet to be part of spreading the word about my new info product (How to Say What You Do, When What You Do is Deep, Powerful, and Hard to Describe).
Ways this could work: I could just tell people without trying to get the words right. I could get my brain more clear by writing up a little email so it’s easier to reach out. I could pick up the phone. I could make a funny page with everyone’s names and pictures on it. I could let myself be a little vulnerable and not sales-y. I could remember that a lot of people really love me and want to support me.
My commitment: Make my love list. Ask one person at a time.
VPA! Yay. Even though I’m late.
From last time: I wanted ease and grace for the traveling. I got it. In spades. With helpful customer service the likes of which I have never seen, and an empty seat beside me for the transatlantic flight. Which meant sleep.
Thank you, VPA!
And I am here and despite some of the tricky it is Okay.
This week:
I feel good! Ask #1, may the good feelings continue, and the ease and the grace.
ways this could work: staying present, listening to the ocean, sitting in the sun, not holding on to things so tightly but instead letting them rest lightly in my palm.
my commitment: to be open to the people. to allow the touch to be lovely. to keep up good communication. to consider playing “if you really knew me” to help with the hard. To keep up with the getting sleep campaign.
Thing 2: My sweetie is struggling. For her, I would like ease and grace and if not joy, hope. And for her to be right, that this time will make us closer. My ask: for me to be helpful and supportive.
ways this could work: magic, mystery, insight.
my commitment: to listen. to learn. to grow. to take care of my own stuffs. to love.
Thing 3: it is not yet time to have it, but I am needing an office space to appear. I would like it to be magic, as many of my homes have been, appearing just right in the right time and place. for this I need clarity. So ask #3 is for clarity about my office. What should it be?
ways this could work: draw, walk on the sand, paint, use the beach for a sketchpad.
my commitment: to listen, to write, to hear the things under the words, to ask the questions of my heart and not necessarily the right-and-approved questions. to practice saying yes, wholly.
thanks, Havi!
This is hard to do. My wants seem so big, the commitments so airy-fairy and non-specific/helpful…
EVEN THOUGH it feels that way, I’m going to have another go.
Thing 1: The perfectly packed handbag
What I want:
I want to repack my ‘perfectly packed handbag’ as I did a year or so ago. To be, scout like, ‘ready for anything’. (Is that the phrase? ‘Be prepared’? Something like that anyway). With a pocket knife, and clear nail polish ready to catch that loose screw and fix it! With everything that I need ready to hand so I don’t have to be hopeless and ask other people for it. So I can have a turn at being the one dispensing lozenges or tampons or safety pins!
Ways this could work:
* I could spend my lunchtime doing it
* Or lunchtime tomorrow, or the day after.
My commitment:
* To have fun being Miss Martha
* To think about growing a ‘restocking’ ritual into my weekly greenhouse reviews (also, must include some silly image involving stockings)
* To stay loose and ask what this is really about
* To take notes
Note to self: this reminds me of my teenage desire to be a ‘perfectly elegant woman’. Still, serene, very tidy, very well dressed, very perfect hair and make up and nails and clothes. Very upright and yet relaxed, sitting still, completely absorbed in the view out the window. Very blonde. Somewhat aloof, or perhaps, unapproachable. Not that she meant it, it was my timidity and shyness and sloppiness and disorganisation that made me feel too … ashamed … to approach. To approach this imaginary figure in my head.
Why did I want to be that? To be opposite of how I felt myself to be. Poor me aged 17! What a silly teenage-y thing to dream of, yearn for. Did you EVER see anyone like that? Okay, yes, in the MOVIES where everything is choreographed and set up to look like that. How about in real life?
No. Okay. I don’t know where to go with this except to say ‘that’s interesting’ about how this wish reminds me of that old wish. Hmmmm
Thing 2: Paperwork movement
What I want:
To get the various forms and reports and supporting documents and so on together and copied and SHIPPED.
Ways this could work:
* I could spend my lunchtime doing it
* Or lunchtime tomorrow, or the day after.
My commitment:
* To let Miss Priss take charge and do it for me
* To remember that Miss Priss doesn’t mean to intimidate me or make me feel bad for not being very good at this myself. To remember that she is the part of me that IS good at doing this.
* To acknowledge the sadness and fear that the papers bring up, because they are such concrete, actual, ACKNOWLEDGING things of something that I wish was otherwise.
* To let Miss Priss take CARE OF ME so I can be sad and frightened AND take care of my family by getting this paperwork out and the help flowing in. So I can do both things. So we can get the help flowing in!
Thing 3: A budget. Or, multiple budgets to fit multiple how-our-lives-could-be-organised scenarios.
What I want:
I want to be clear about a) what I can spend on what under current circumstances, and b) what options I have about the various ways our lives could be organised. Do I need to work? (Probably). How much? Can we cut back on childcare, transport, food and the other cost-of-sale expenses for my working hours? How much would we save if we changed how we live?
How this could work:
* I could spend my lunchtime doing it
* Or lunchtime tomorrow, or the day after
* I could daydream about things
My commitment:
* To acknowledge this is a big job, and slightly daunting
* To tackle just a little bit
* To give it some time, literally, and you know, in the scheme of things
There! I can get some words around it….
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