One of the things my clients want help with the most is getting really great testimonials for the cool stuff they do. Or, really, at this point, getting any testimonials.
And they’re absolutely right to want help with it because yes, this is one of those “make or break it” things in business.
A couple of good, well-placed testimonials will totally [oh, I don’t know, insert exciting verb!] up the number of people who enthusiastically throw money at you, hire you, buy your stuff, tell other people about you, etc.
The two reasons you’re not getting testimonials.
1. Reason number one: you feel weird about asking.
Just to be clear: I’m so not criticizing you for not asking, if that’s what’s going on for you.
Of course you’re not asking. It’s completely legitimate to feel uncomfortable, weird and possibly extremely icky about asking people for testimonials.
It’s hard to get around that creepy feeling that you’re just begging people to say something nice about you. And that’s kind of awkward, yes.
So I’m definitely not going to tell you “just get over yourself” or “just start asking people already”, because that would just be stupid.
And guess what? The fact that you’re not asking is actually a good thing, because when you do ask, you often bump straight into Reason number two.
Reason number two: you asked and now you’re screwed.
People hate being asked for testimonials. Most people.*
*There’s pretty much only one exception to that rule and that’s the person who writes to someone like me saying “I wrote a testimonial for your thing that I don’t even own and you should put it on your website and then link to me!” This does happen. But not too often.
Here’s a little clip of what’s happening inside the average person’s head when you ask them for a testimonial:
Panic (stage one):
“Oh no. Crap. What do I say? I never know what to say. I mean, yeah, I love his stuff but what do I saaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay?”
Avoidance (stage 2):
“Okay. Breathe. Breathe. I’ll deal with this later. I’ll think it over and maybe — eventually — I’ll come up with something that won’t make me sound like a total freaking idiot.”
Resentment and projection (stage 3):
“No, you know what? No matter what I come up with, I’ll sound stupid and it will take me forever and I don’t have time for this right now. Argh. Why won’t people leave me alone?”
Embarrassment and annoyance (stage 4):
“Is this still in my inbox? I can’t believe I haven’t done this yet. I hate this. I hate it. And now he probably thinks I’m the world’s biggest ass. And every time I go into my inbox I feel like dirt. I suck. And he’s the reason I’m feeling like this. It’s not fair.”
Awesome. Now they despise themselves and the situation they’re in AND they (unconsciously, yes?) resent you too. Even though they love you and your work.
True story. This is incredible.
A friend of mine owns a yoga studio. Beautiful place.
She bought some all-natural good-for-the-world candles to light during class. And she loved them. They were local and hand-made and they smelled good and the whole thing was in perfect alignment with her green studio philosophy.
She was planning on ordering another enormous batch of them. And then the guy who makes the candles asked her for a testimonial.
My friend is not in any way inarticulate. She’s a really good writer. An amazing teacher.
But she just kind of froze. She could not for the life of her come up with a single thing to say about the candles. Everything that came to mind seemed insipid and bland.
So she didn’t write back. And some time went by. So much time that she felt awkward even answering it at all. Okay, over a year. And it’s sitting in her inbox this whole time.
Meanwhile, she’s out of candles for the studio. Out of the candles that she loves — plus she’s too embarrassed to order more, because she’s afraid he’s going to ask her about the testimonial.
Meanwhile, he’s probably thinking that she didn’t even really like them in the first place. Disaster.
Here’s what happens when you ask for testimonials.
Admittedly, the story with my friend is a slightly extreme case. But not as extreme as you’d might think.
Typically, when you just ask for a testimonial there are two possible results.
- Result #1: You don’t get one and the person you asked feels awkward and uncomfortable and now you’ve also lost future business and referrals. Great.
- Result #2: You get a testimonial, but it sucks because they (understandably) put on their “I’m an authority” hat to write it so it’s blandified.**
**And it sounds like it was written by a robot: “As a trained coach of blabbity-blah, I find that So-And-So’s services are inspiring, insightful and individual. They will lead you to success. Call her today!”
Why I’ve stopped helping clients with this.
So yeah, I’ve taught a lot of people how to get really, really good testimonials without feeling gross about it or having the person they’ve asked start to resent them.
And I have a LOT to say about this topic, not to mention some seriously genius techniques. Much more than I could fit into a few blog posts.
At this point, though, you can’t hire me to help you with this, because I’ve stopped letting people hire me for anything that doesn’t use my superpower.
My superpower is zapping stucknesses. I’m really good at it. Really really good. Ridiculously good. So good that using me for other stuff is a waste of my time. And, of course, your time too.
So instead, apparently I’m going to have to teach a course on it. (And if this isn’t your thing, stop right here and come back tomorrow for regular Fluent Self-ified curriculum).
A course on how to get really really great testimonials and referrals.
Okay. You twisted my arm. And it’s called… uh …
Stuff Havi thinks you should know about how to get really really great testimonials and referrals.
Yeah, I didn’t have time to come up with a title so Selma wrote it.
Anyway, here’s some of what my clients now know that I’ll be covering in the course:
- EXACTLY what to say to people so that when you ask you don’t have to feel gross about it and they won’t resent you for asking.
- Why I never give testimonials, but the one thing you could do to get a really good one from me anyway.
- How to get referrals even when you can’t talk about what you do.
- How to get referrals in a seamless, natural way where other people won’t feel weird about giving them.
- How to ask for testimonials and/or referrals without making it seem like you’re asking.
- Every step you need to cover in order to get the kind of testimonials that make people want to drop everything they’re doing and happily throw money at you.
- How to approach famous people. I was astonished by how much my own sales went up once I got testimonials from people like Pam Slim and Naomi Dunford. I’ll tell you what to do.
All the details. The bonus. The price. The discount. Yes. That.
The details:
Two 90 minute teleclasses. And one 90 minute Q&A session where I’ll answer whatever you throw at me.
The bonus: Course tuition includes the digital version of the homestudy.
Which means that whether or not you come to any of the actual classes you’ll be able to listen to the recordings and read the notes.
You can also send your questions by email and I’ll answer them during the Q&A call.
The price (without the discount for blog readers)
The price of the class is $154.*
*Just, you know, a little perspective: my hourly rate is $485. You’re getting 4.5 hours for a fraction of one hour.
This is low.**
** So low you should write me letters complaining about it but then your chances of me letting you in the course are also low.
And the discount for blog readers. That might be you?
BUT I’m doing a way lower (like, a hundred dollars lower) price for those of you who hang out here and read my stuff all the time. because I like you.
The CATCH. Here it is.
» If you want the lower price, you have to be able to:
A. correctly answer the question “who is Selma?” or “who is Stu?” and
B. put that answer into the comments box in the shopping cart. The comments box is the box where it asks if you want to make a comment. I know, right?
Price for Havi fans |
Regular price |
 |
 |
*** REGISTRATION IS NOW CLOSED. ***
This course will be available later in homestudy form – you can look for it in the Fluent Self store.
First class is Sunday, May 3rd at 1:00 p.m. Pacific (again, you don’t have to be at the actual class — you get the recordings and notes!). Registration will END before the course begins. Probably significantly before. If you’re thinking it over, sign up.
Good.
Now I don’t have to feel bad about refusing to help my clients with this anymore. 🙂
p.s. Don’t buy this if you are a current member of my Kitchen Table program!
p.p.s. First person to point out that there are no testimonials for this course gets mocked mercilessly. Oh, how I amuse myself.
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My mechanic asked me for a testimonial for CitySearch and I JUMPED at the chance to write him one! (He has been incredible to me, honest, and I was tired of getting ripped off by men who saw me as an open credit card.)
But you’re right, most of the time it just feels weird.
Hayden Tompkinss last blog post..What’s Your Privacy Equilibrium?
Hurray. Glad I read all the way to the ps. This sounds fabulous.
One further ick with testimonials: how do you use them once you’ve got them… because that can feel kind of braggy.
JoVEs last blog post..How Professors Think
Hiya
I liked reading this perspective on testimonials. Gave me a good chuckle too. Thanks
I’ve written a few testimonials but never for candles. What would I write? ‘They burnt well’? ‘They give good light’? ‘They add a special glow to the ambience’? Maybe.
Thanks again
Jens
Jens Uptons last blog post..Creating Pleasure from Leisure
@JoVE – Yes! Will absolutely be covering that. I have two things to say about that (which have completely saved me from deleting all my testimonials). Really good point. And yay, see you there.
@Jens – No kidding. We get so stressed out trying to come up with something useful or valuable to say that we can’t even manage a “wow, these candles are my favorite thing about coming to yoga.”
Actually, my uncle (the one who lives in the woods and gave my duck a chicken) used to make and sell homemade candles, and yes, totally impossible to describe how great they are. 🙂
One thing I did for Karen was use an open source extension for her ecommerce site. When people have a channeling session, once she marks it as complete then it automatically says “hey, if you want to write a testimonial, then here’s the link.” Because it’s a form, there’s no pressure. People don’t like pressure.
Another thing she does is to just follow up with a “how was it?”. If the response is like a testimonial, she just asks if she can use it as one.
And of course, there’s LinkedIn. That can be good too.
Matthew | Polaris Risings last blog post..Having issues *about* issues.
Havi–YAY!!!!! I am **so** there for this class.
However, my Inner Proofreader would like to fact-check for the benefit of all your readers here. You wrote:
“First class is Sunday, May 5th at 1:00 p.m. Pacific.”
Umm–would that be Sunday, May 3rd? Or Tuesday, May 5th? ;o)
Michelle Russells last blog post..Happy Accidents
Havi, I’m so glad you’re offering this course! For me, it comes in perfect timing, as always. 🙂
I can’t wait to hear what you and Selma have to say about testimonials–asking for them, writing them, following up with them.
When approached from the heart, asking for and writing a testimonial can be such an opportunity for deeper connection, creativity, and appreciation.
Hiro Bogas last blog post..Filling the well of your heart . . .
@Hiro – I love the way you look at it. That’s so beautiful!
@Michelle – You are so completely right and I am so completely wrong! I was thinking about a different class I am teaching that week – how confusing.
Thanks for sorting that out. Corrected! The first class *is* Sunday, May 3rd.
That sounds great! Could be useful for my (coming soon) business, and certainly for my gentleman friend’s business as well. I have a bit too much stuff going on right now to be able to think straight, though, so I’ll let it sit for a while, but I’m pretty sure I’ll be back to sign up soon…
I would like to register a complaint. It was promised to me that the receipt robot would sound like Havi. It does not. It sounds like a blasted robot! All tinny and weird, like the muppets after Jim died. 🙁
How do I get a poignant single tear in my unhappy…um…smiley?
Well, ok, the robot *did* sound like a robot, but I don’t really care. Can’t wait for the class!
It’s a similar sort of concern for people who need reference letters (for things like university admissions and such). Half the time the people you need references from just say “oh, write it yourself and I’ll sign it”. And then the other half is getting someone who would write you a reference – but you’re afraid of what the other person would say. “What if they really think I suck?! OMGZ”
Tiaras last blog post..The Merch Girl and other projects
Perfect timing! I was asked a week and a half ago to write a LinkedIn endorsement for a former boss. I told him I’d have it done in a couple days yet still had it lingering a week later. I just couldn’t figure out what to say that sounded smart enough. I finally wrote a rough draft on Sunday and this morning I finished it up and sent it over to him (promptly breathing a big sigh of relief). A couple hours later I read your post and laughed at all those stages of emotions I had just gone through over a simple little paragraph.
Thanks for always knowing what to say!
Sherris last blog post..Everyone Should Have a Duck
I’ve been really surprised at emails I’ve gotten simply in response to having gotten my art delivered either by my making sure it arrived ok or them excitedly spontaneously sending a message.
The cool thing was because I post about most of my paintings or they get posted elsewhere, sometimes by the buyer, I got to create a testimonial page with a lot of links to get full story. Fun
http://www.vinylart.info/testimonials.htm
I think the hangup comes when you call it a testimonial. If you just ask them if they’re happy, then it comes out.
Peace,
@vinylart
Daniel Edlens last blog post..Up Front
First thing I thought of (honestly) was that a shorter title might be “Helping People Help Your Business” but that is probably my Inner Critic coming out. The course is gonna be great because you’re teaching it… (Which is a pre-testimonial!)
Since I’m on a roll, everybody go check out Daniel’s art at http://www.vinylart.com . It’s truly amazing stuff and you can see the love he puts into it.
Oh my, the ‘testimonial thing’. It’s so true: it can get extremely uncomfortable asking for them. I’ve so far only done that twice with not very good results.
However, when people ask me to write THEM a testimonial I love doing it. It’s an opportunity to sink into my heart and bring forth something true and off their nature that will give them a win in life, whatever it is they’re doing.
Now, when I follow up with people, because I’m genuinely invested in their well-being and care for them, and they happen to say something really sweet and ‘quotable’ I ask them if I can use it. Usually they’re delighted!
No pressure, no weirdness, but simply a real spontaneous and true statement, which, in my opinion, is the best kind of testimonial one can get…
Maarten Elouts last blog post..The Cookie Dough Theory of Happy Living
Are you going to do a course on how to get off your ass and put the testimonials you already have up on your website? Because I would take that course.
Naomi Dunfords last blog post..Urgent: Free SOBCon Tickets, Must Give Away SOON
@Naomi – Crap. I thought YOU were doing that course. *tears hair*
No, we’re covering that too. Because that’s the most annoying part and I suck at it. Will use everyone in class to hold me accountable to actually using my genius technique for that one. Oh, I amuse myself.
Call me a freakazoid but I love writing testimonials (no, I’m not hiring out as a copywriter). I just love telling people about stuff I love. Exception: when people ask me to write about something I’ve barely experienced but that doesn’t happen too often. I think I project a pretty strong “don’t ask me unless I love it” vibe. Am looking forward to the class, Havi.
Laurie Foleys last blog post..Little League Lessons for Entrepreneurs
I must be an enigma. I don’t have a problem asking. For one thing, I wait until we have an established relationship. It would be awkward if you asked for it before starting work 🙂
I’ve been lucky to get good ones. When I ask for them, I give them an idea of how to approach it. Saying someone is awesome tells you nothing. Awesome at being late? Awesome at screwing up things?
I lend a helping hand such as …
“What has my business helped you achieve with x product or service?”
Meryl Evanss last blog post..8 Ways to Kiss up to the Media
What portion is about getting testimonials to getting referrals? Because I’m in a field (psychotherapy) where using testimonials is rather a no-no. Getting referrals can be tricky, too, but at least professionals in my field can do that, and I could use some help with it.
Good point, secret agent girl. A lot of people find therapists by word-of-mouth and therapists can help each other, too. Every therapist has his or her strengths that sometimes they refer a patient to another and vice versa. I’ve seen people who did OK with one therapist and then thrived with the next one.
Sounds like it would also help to build a relationship with local newspaper reporters in health for whenever they need resources or a quote.
Meryl K. Evanss last blog post..9 Ways to Brand YOU
Last night in Shakespeare’s Stratford-on-Avon at the private view for the Visual Arts Forum Exhibition, a fellow artist complemented me on how much she had enjoyed one of my surface design workshops that she had attended last year. I politely thanked her and basked in the a warm glow for a while.
Today thats worn off and you have just helped me understand why! I should have asked her for a testimonial. So, guess Id better sign up to your workshop and learn the painless way to get to keep that warm glow burning! Now I have to figure out what time 1.00pm Pacific is in English money!
P.S. Stratford has an annual duck race down the Avon, you should tell Selma!
One of the biggest issues with sales people is the reluctance to ask for referrals and testimonials and they’ll often leave lots of cash on the table.
I once worked with a guy who after the sale was closed would slide a piece of paper across the table to the buyer and say something like:
“There’s 5 boxes on there, if you could just fill in the names and numbers of 5 people that you know would benefit from our services like you have done, that would be great”
You need to have brilliant rapport building skills and huge nads to do that, let me tell you!
OTOH, In my experience I really don’t think most people mind giving testimonials at all. I’m sure some do, but a great many don’t.
Tim Brownsons last blog post..Tips For Agile Living
@Tim – wow. That is ballsy. Awesome. My ways are way less scary. 🙂
And you’re right that some don’t mind at all. The problem is more that the ones they do give are crappy and have to be edited and people don’t know how to edit them to make them readable and useful.
And many people *kind of* don’t mind but they still feel incompetent and then resentful for having to feel incompetent, and even if it’s happening under the surface, having that rub off on you if it isn’t necessary is kind of a shame since it doesn’t need to happen.
@secretagentgirl (best handle ever!) – The first class is testimonials, the second class is referrals and the third is “answering all your questions and applying to your particular thing”.
I’ve worked with a lot of therapists as clients and we’ve found some brilliant workarounds to the no-testimonials thing, and there’s so much more you can do than just hoping for/counting on word of mouth. You can be very, very strategic without at all seeming like you’re strategic, and in a way that makes people feel completely happy to refer you without having it be uncomfortable or weird.
Hope that helps.
In terms of answering some of the other stuff that’s come up here, I think I’ll probably write another post. Because I realize I’ve been pretty unclear.
Because this is an issue my clients deal with so often, it hadn’t occurred to me to take the time to explain *why* getting really good testimonials is such a big deal and what’s involved in getting the good ones.
Seriously, if my advice were something like “just ask” or “make it easy on them”, I would not even think about offering a course or charging money for this. The reason it’s a class is because the stuff I’m teaching is mind-blowingly great and it changed my life. Not common sense. I don’t charge for common sense.
So I’ll do a better job of explaining the what and the why. Or I’ll just wait until the course is over and then you can read about what it did for people.
What timing! I just attended a sales seminar (to be inspired to think bigger) and my takeaway first project is to collect testimonials – which makes a great one liner on my todo list. Upon reading your post Havi I remember why this task never gets to my Done list. I get lots of compliments but not in a for I can use.
Sign me up.
Selma is your duck and second in command and Stu is your voice recognition software.
Jennifer Dobsons last blog post..SohoIntelligence creates custom web site for Elvis Impersonator
I’m signed up and really looking forward to this, Havi. But I just had an uh oh, am I in the right class moment.
I’m moving out of working one to one & beginning to create programs & telecourses. I need Why you should trust me / listen to me kind of testimonials, and Hey you should do this program! testimonials but they’d be from people who haven’t yet taken the courses (since the courses don’t yet exist.)
Hope you have some ideas how to make that work.
@Mahala – Fantastic question. Love it. I will make sure to cover it in class #3… and if for some reason I don’t seem to be getting around to it, please poke me loudly. 🙂
Argh. Missed it.
Aarrrrggh.
Let us know when the home study version’s available, won’t you?
Hilarys last blog post..Going deeper
Thanks Havi. Yay for covering in class #3.
BTW, I was laughing in class #1 every time you said “there are 3 points to this, no 4…5.” Do you know the famous Monty Python routine The Spanish Inquisition?
“NOBODY expects the Spanish Inquisition! Our chief weapon is surprise…surprise and fear…fear and surprise…. Our two weapons are fear and surprise…and ruthless efficiency…. Our *three* weapons are fear, surprise, and ruthless efficiency…and an almost fanatical devotion to the Pope…. Our *four*…no… *Amongst* our weapons…. Amongst our weaponry…are such elements as fear, surprise….”
Mahalas last blog post..Prayer Bead Malas and Jewelry