Hello, week: we are here.
Thank you, week. Thank you, space to reflect.
{a breath for being here when we get here}
This is week 422 of this ritual, and so we chicken.
What’s been working?
Change your place, change your luck. Feet on the ground.
I might try…
Asking for company.
Naming the days.
Ease of transition. When I put my house in order. Surprise good brew! New place new luck. Clarity lands. Circulating Light. Let’s do this.
8 breaths for the hard, challenging and mysterious.
- External circumstances disrupting sleep and causing physical discomfort/distress. I get it, I’m being redirected. I see the door marked exit opening for me. But in the meantime, need rest and a bed that doesn’t hurt my back. Solutions, please! A breath.
- Examining my relationship with uncertainty: how much I crave it but also how small-me loses her footing and needs to be scooped up with love. Many mysteries here. A breath of presence.
- My entire childhood was spent believing we were about to move countries at any moment, which then never happened, and as an adult, I have a tendency to unconsciously operate by “hmmm I’ll believe it when I see it”. Unsurprisingly, making plans for adventuring from this mindset is difficult, and I am discovering so much trust-pain in my heart. Breathing for now is not then.
- A wistful wish: I want to live near friends and wander over to their house for tea like in tel aviv. Feeling sad and dissatisfied about this chopped up online life, everyone I care about is in a different time zone, busy with life-stuff, and we miss out on each other. And I see the pull of social media as a sort of substitute — snapshots of what people are seeing, thinking, hoping, eating, but it doesn’t work for me. I want to be out under the stars with the people I love. A breath.
- Things I do not like that are a regular part of my life right now: extreme heat, mosquitos, the migraine that apparently will not end until I restore my crown. Also, as always, sexism, everywhere and in all things, and the way it somehow never loses its power to deflate all the balloons in the parade, which of course is why it exists. All the -isms and unquestioned power structures. A breath for this.
- Situation that was already the worst has reached entirely new levels of What Fresh Hell Is This. I am hearing the no loud and clear but still don’t see the bridge. A breath for speedy, easy, inexpensive solutions.
- Sensory overwhelm making it so difficult to be in the world. A breath.
- Inhale, exhale. May all misunderstandings and distortions, internal and external, dissolve in love if not in laughter. May peacefulness prevail. Trust-more love-more release-more receive-more. Goodbye (and thank you), mysteries and hard moments of this week.
8 breaths for the good, reassuring, delight-filled.
- Not being on twitter is delicious. It feels exactly like not smoking: ahhh so much more air, so much more spaciousness, combined with “oh right, I need a new way to take breaks”. Lovely to just not know about the toxic awful things circulating in the world. Obviously there are enormous quantities of magic beans of privilege involved that allow me to close the door to the bad news of the world, but oh how much highly sensitive me needed this. A breath for closing more doors.
- Four days with my uncle, living in his world, which makes so much sense to me. He has no plans. Everything is quiet. He does what he wants, which is not much. We wander the woods and swing on the swings and pick blackberries and balance on things and visit a dog. We laugh a lot. Nothing needs to be said. He naps in the sun like a cat. We make salad for dinner and eat outside in rocking cheers and are visited by baby deer. A breath for all of this.
- I want to live like he does. Writing, wandering, stretching, napping. Everything in his space is wood or cloth or metal. There is no plastic in sight and everything has a different vibration than in the rest of the world. He knows about sanctuary. He has almost no needs, and they are covered by renting out his place. A breath for reminders of what I want.
- My instincts were right about the misunderstanding with the cowboy being just that. He came back four days early from his trip into the mountains and we sorted it out easily, with big love. A breath for trust love.
- Incoming me is wise, and all I need to do is ask. A breath of appreciation.
- Went dancing in Eugene, and had the loveliest time. Will never run out of awe for how unlikely dance magic is, to take the hand of a total stranger and be able to share three minutes of joyful creative play, the ease of communication, the delight in inventing something together in the secret language of dance. A breath of gratitude for all my panther training.
- I named a day Clarity Lands, and it did. A breath for the magic of naming.
- Thankfulness. Treasure in the form of lightness, being welcome, ginger soda, having what I needed when I needed it. Everything is okay and so much is good. Nothing is wrong, even when I want to believe it is. Now is not then. All Timing Is Right Timing. Thank you for this grand adventure. A full breath of deep appreciation in my thank-you heart.
Superpowers I had this week…
Last week I asked for the powers of Feet On The Ground, which is fascinating because I forgot that I seeded this, and then undid the lifelong habit of crossing my legs.
And I asked for a mute button, and fewer people thought I was mute this week.
Powers I want.
In the gokhale workshops, they say something like “your body will not be able to tolerate being uncomfortable any more, it will ask you to adjust”, which is amazing and also scary-wonderful.
Like, what if this happens on all levels? What if I no longer tolerate emotional discomfort, mental discomfort, energy discomfort, and insist on making the necessary crown-on adjustments? This thrills me and terrifies me, and I would like the superpower of finding this Ridiculously Easy and Beautifully Simple.
The Salve of Ridiculously Easy and Beautifully Simple
This is a salve of easing and releasing, echoing and reverberating, and it will make you bubble up with laughter.
This might also be the best ever fractal flower salve.
Playing live at the meme beach house — the Fake Band of the Week!
This week’s band is from Pamela, who is hands-down the funniest person I know, even though I am never sure if she is trying to be or not. I am also appreciating that the band in this chicken was named for a rooster, which for some reason hits me right in the funny bone.
Too Handsome To Die
Their latest album is Unexpected Flags, and this band is just one guy.
Announcement time….
Quieting the monsters is one of the most useful self-fluency skills there is. You can buy the monster manual which is available here, and it is enormously useful if you would like to practice being Way Less Impressed with the horrible things that internal critical voices say. And it comes with a coloring book.
How was your week?
Come play in the comments. Share something from your week, take a breath, or just say hi! No rules, my format doesn’t have to be yours, we’ve been doing this every week for years now and there still isn’t a right way.
Everyone belongs. We let people have their own experience. We’re supportive and welcoming. We lovingly refrain from giving advice.
And of course it’s always okay to comment under a made-up name, whether for play and delight, or in the interest of Safety First.
Wishing you a glorrrrrrrrrrrrious day, a restful weekend and a happy week to come.
It’s fine if it’s not Friday anymore. There’s complete chicken amnesty — jump in whenever you like. Blowing kisses to the Beloved Lurkers too!
Follow
So lovely to read about Svevo’s sanctuary and lovers’ meetings and magics.
What’s been working?
Not chasing after every op/offer/deal.
Doing maths.
What to try next?
More math. More mise. Maybe a massage.
Hard, draining, disappointing…
* Can’t support/donate to every worthy/beloved prospect/offering
* Helplessness
* Hostility
* Being asked for more on multiple fronts when feeling particularly rundown/depleted/pressed
* Contractors appropriating/destroying personal tools/supplies
* Mustiness and mold
* Cramps
* Another failure at rogue rose propagation
Good, joy-expanding, pleasing, fun …
* Seeing Cousin W perform, and receiving the now-customary peck on the cheek afterward.
* Wham-boomed assorted big-ass deliverables.
* Excellent numbers.
* Putting presents into the post.
* The zinnias are huge and the peppers abundant.
Warm wishes to all y’all.
Rogue Rose Propagation definitely needs to be a band. <3 <3 <3
It is a band, now that you mention it. There’s a hammered dulcimer creating fountains around a trombone’s sultry slide from “My Funny Valentine” to “Badlands” while the drummer’s sticks pinwheel over his head again and again, and it’s almost made me spill my bourbon into my plate of barbecue, because, of course, it’s all just one guy.
A breath for transitions.
A breath for adapting to new rhythms.
A breath for joyful and tender expressions of love.
A breath for daily writing.
A breath for sovereignty.
A breath for shoes.
A breath for generosity and kindness.
A breath for you, reading these words, keeping me company. Thank you.
A grateful breath for the salve of Ridiculously Easy and Beautifully Simple. I can already feel it doing me good. Ahhhhhhh. <3
Farewell, week. Welcome, new week.
<3 <3 <3
The company thing is beautiful, Kathleen. I love that energy. Thankyou for naming it, and sweet, gentle energy your way too *smiles*
Farewell, week, and farewell outgoing me! For the first time ever {outgoing} me asked for a ritual / celebration. She wanted something very specific and surprisingly lavish, and I was somehow able to make all of this happen. This celebration allowed me to let go of the aspects of outgoing me that are no longer necessary while celebrating all of her amazing accomplishments (namely: she brought me here! Wondrous!).
WONDROUS! What a beautiful farewell.
Working
• Eating only fresh produce (even though I occasionally break this with bread and coffee)
• Setting tiny goals, even when they seem ludicrously small; I still get to feel a sense of accomplishment and commitment as I work towards I ultimately need
• Communicating with my body in sweet, loving ways
• Focusing on each my Heart, my Mind, and my Body, and what they each need, and making space to listen to each one (as often my Mind drowns out everything)
• Working (ha!) on changing my relationship with Rest
• Noticing Righteousness and Breathing Sweet Humbleness (humility rarely seems the right word!)
• And noticing what’s working, hurray!
To try
• Really noticing and rejoicing in my Strengths and those Secret Magical Skills that I take for granted
The Hard
• Betwixt and Between, and the Heartache it causes
• Yearning—omgoodness, yearning gives me so much deep grief and harks to years of old
• Not knowing ways other than Severing to survive Yearning
• Grief—not just the Enormity of it (though that too) but how it just picks up ALL the other pieces of grief along the lifeline, both big and small, and whooshes them in together so that it’s insanely overwhelming
• Being a Sensitive Expressive—many Sensitives are reserved but I’m expressive so often find myself easily shamed
• Fatigue—so little energy, AND fighting myself as I’m used to such a high level of functioning *a breath for gentle ease and tender acceptance*
The Lovely
• Sunshine! Throwing open my doors and windows as Spring weather starts to peek through this long, cold, dark winter!
• The sweet boy wanting me and noticing my absence keenly
• Nurturing my body with fresh produce, coffee without sugar
• A vacuum cleaner guy who cares and invests energy rather than the usual salesy shit
• Gently, and in tiny pieces, learning to Luxuriate (as “rest” is so much more challenging!)
• Crazy new ways of relating with my mother that are bonding, and in some ways almost healing—for this, I could never express the level of gratitude I feel; I think we both need this, and it’s like a Settling of what has been The Most Tumultuous Relationship of my life. It makes me tear up just writing this
• Booking lunch dates! I love this ‘hey, why don’t we just set aside time to focus on each other’ type of energy!
Wow, I named it before I experienced it. *shame at writing so much, revealing so much*
Sweet, tender breaths for those of that us that are Sensitive Expressives *keeps breathing*
Sensitive Expressive! Oh, Magic, *thank* you so much for putting words to something I have experienced countless times throughout my life. If I had a nickel for every time I asked a trusted friend some variation on the question, “Did I act like a jerk at that party?” …a breath for us all. <3 <3 <3
*smiles warmly*
I’m so glad I came back to re-read and caught your comment, Kathleen!
Love to everyone’s chickens. Thank you, week, and cheers to the week ahead.
What worked this week? playing games: watching for spots where I can change my place, change my view. A move the stones game to remind me to keep drinking water. This is a way of being kind to myself because – especially at work – I get into such a deep dive I forget about everything else, including me. And, the game of If I were on Rally! for the next 15 minutes, I would….
Superpowers I had this week: DeepKindness, TimeIsOnMySide, and Big[Secret]Fun. I want these superpowers again this week.
-a lot going on at work
-uncluttering & rearranging
-#2Dog getting sick and the vet time and money related to it
-it was still too hot this week
+interesting play with proxies. I had/have had monsters telling me I don’t know how to do proxies and I’m not good at proxies. I decided to play anyway. what was fun was the starting the proxy game. Even though the proxy itself dropped off at we went along the path, it was the proxy and *trying* the proxy that moved us out of stuck.
+a lot going on at work. the “lot” is exciting, everyone is working towards the goal. we’re all tired. the bosses see it all happening and are supportive and appreciative and they are working harder than we worker bees.
+a short break in the heat wave
+I think I smelled autumn early one morning
monday morning chicken! Cluck!
What’s working? Playing hookey this morning! oh joy and space! I AM ALONE IN MY HOUSE!
what worked last week: Aligning with Best practices always helps–the closer we stick to that, the better. Earl Gray and frequent rest.
the sucks:
-in typical fashion, last week was the week of no energy and nothing much gettin g accomplished in the evenings. I had a lot of productive evenings last week, so this one got to be the off week
-recognizing one week a month will just be no-accomplishments at all, and feeling this is appropriate and still not liking it
-i did so well at releasing [X] and then a random facebook message and i’m back at chasing. ugh. a breath for sovereignty
-all the ways my crown slips.
-lack of progress on [too many things]
-the lack of comfort of living with a porcupine. and it’s a feature not a bug, so yeah
-stressed out oldest kid, and all the ways the resident porcupine exacerbates the stress.
but so much sparkle:
-last week several things i had been wishing for, landed. it was an embarassment of riches
-including an AUDITION for a stage play in december, and hell yes i scheduled an audition. a breath for the exhilaration
-dancing, burlesque, yoga, the secret spirals -the fractals of movement and how they each support and aid the others
-hit one of my 2016 stretch goals!
-Pagan pride day. so much fun
-good energetic work with a new friend. very pleased
-small progress, consistently. which means 1000% less panic and monsters
-ease, support, and today;s unscheduled Vote for Well-Tending. I dont know why i got no sleep last nite, but i’m not going to suffer thru this day, putting everything first except me.
-being on B’way. I love denver, i really do, and being at the Park yesterday, then catching a bit solo, walking around behind the musuem..i love my town, this is the best time of year here, i am really feeling the joy
-we are back to defcon yellow, maybe even defcon green at home.
-i have never been overjoyed with the idea that i am the center of the house, and that the emotional vibe in this house is due 90% to me. but denying it doesnt help. a breath for sovereignty, accepting reality, and owning what i create.
-I am alone in my house rihgt now. no one is here but me, i have HOURS like this. i can actually do something important.
Hello chicken, hello chickeneers!
oh my word, what a week that was, all the hard and the good mixed up together
– the waiting and waiting for the news that was going to be bad
– and it came, and it was bad news
– and I can’t really believe it even now, how can A be gone?
– eight hundred people, what was I doing putting myself in a space with eight hundred people miles from the nearest railway station
– and how can I be so depleted, no wonder I cried all Saturday night
– but you know what, when I needed to get drunk and sing Goodnight Irene, a subset of those people turned out to be the right people to do that with
– sleep and more sleep
– I got a new job, hurrah; it’s been a long time coming
and at the moment I think I am too tired to tease it all out and work out what’s going on
I’m just going to say,
here it is, chicken, here it is
cluck cluck cluck
chicken out
– o –
and <3