Hello, week: we are here.
It’s a Sunday chicken this time because this week was tough and weird, and also I thought yesterday was Friday. Glad to be here now, and glad you are here too.
{a breath for being here when we get here}
Thank you, week!
This is the 409th week in a row we are chickening here together!
What’s been working?
Inquiring about the superpowers.
For example, here are some of superpowers of the Chicken:
I speak my truth / grounded and present / sense of humor intact / trust in right timing / ritual invites holiness / the magic of naming what is / reflection is powerful stuff / I am open to learning something new
I might try…
I want to remember how hard travel is on my body, and in less visible ways, and to plan my recovery with the same attention to detail I give to booking flights.
Naming the days.
This week was the week of boundaries and bells, and these were the days.
Bell of the bells. Crown on, crown on. I am spectacular. I take space for myself. I take in life. It’s a good day. What needs to change in my kingdom.
Upcoming biopic if it were based on this week…
She Needs To Go Hide Now. The Havi Brooks story.
8 breaths for the hard, challenging and mysterious.
- Everything about traveling was the worst. And then I thought things would get better once I was done traveling but recovery was rough. Bouts of what my friend the arborist calls “visiting Spain”, where Spain = S Pain, and the S is for severe. And then sometimes the invisible kinds of S-pain like Energy Spain, Emotional Spain, Mental Spain. A breath for rest, and, if we’re already in Spain, making time for tapas and sangria.
- My mother used to say she found Oregon “claustrophobic”, because of the mountains. I always thought it was so interesting/bizarre how she didn’t see that the claustrophobia was probably just being around her domineering energy-vampire of a mother-in-law. But now I do the same thing with Michigan. As soon as I’m there, the sluggish zero energy sludge takes over and I’m convinced it’s hard to breathe there, as if it’s Denver and a mile in the air, when of course the reason I can’t get oxygen is being in close proximity to the locations of awful experiences from my past. No wonder my body translates this as something wrong with the air. A breath of compassion and healing.
- I missed my mom so much this week, so many tears, a breath for life.
- On the theme of hard to breathe: this week’s mission was continued de-cobwebbing, grime-removal and painting in the basement, and my lungs did not like this and basically said WE QUIT, which was ultimately a very useful experience (I listened to my body and all was well), but I really had to experience the pain of this to understand. A breath for me.
- The beautiful boy left again. Which, I mean, a) how am I not used to these goodbyes yet and the aching longing they bring, and b) it was right there on the schedule so it’s not like it was a surprise. Speaking of things that take my breath away: a breath for this.
- Craving sanctuary, ease, a place for me to write and take care of myself. A breath of steadiness.
- I just want a home that is my home. A breath of trust and safe passage.
- Inhale, exhale. May all misunderstandings and distortions, internal and external, dissolve in love if not in laughter. May peacefulness prevail. Trust-more love-more release-more receive-more. Goodbye (and thank you), mysteries and hard moments of this week.
8 breaths for the good, reassuring, delight-filled.
- The beautiful faraway cowboy flew to Detroit for four days to be with me at my brother’s wedding, which is pretty much the sweetest thing anyone has ever done for me, and I cannot even imagine how I would have made it through that intense weekend without his warmth and sweetness. A breath of thankfulness.
- Heart of wild sweetness. A breath for spilling over with love.
- While not everyone appreciates what it means when I prioritize [extreme self-care and preserving my energy] over social interactions, so many people in my life have been wonderfully understanding about my choices and boundaries, including people I don’t necessarily expect to be able to do this like my dad, or friends I grew up with. That was a beautiful thing to experience, and I feel so grateful. A breath for this.
- My dance teacher was in town and I booked a two hour private lesson and oh wow, something that I’ve only ever understood conceptually actually landed in my body, and I am so excited about this. A breath for dance, which is the most mystical, transcendent, transformative form of communication that I know of.
- I have been trying to do everything myself and suddenly realized that I don’t need to, and now I feel better. A breath of sweet trust.
- All week long I have been skipping stones, and receiving so much useful intel and encouragement from incoming me and my wise project. A breath of release.
- The last time I was between-homes was one of the most terrifying things I have ever experienced, and this time I am on a Grand Adventure. A breath for finally getting that now is not then, and experiencing the healing magic of do-overs.
- Thankfulness. Treasure in the form of the guest room at Agent Emdee’s, Agent Spalding who always cheers me up, an entire week of my hair looking amazing, non-metaphorical sandwiches, pickles on the side. So much treasure. Everything is okay and so much is good. Nothing is wrong, even when I want to believe it is. Now is not then. All Timing Is Right Timing. Thank you for this grand adventure. A full breath of deep appreciation in my thank-you heart.
Superpowers I had this week…
Last week I asked for the power of being glowingly unapologetic about the fullness and richness of who I am. And to be honest, that felt like a reach, even beyond just how weird it is to ask for a superpower. But in retrospect, I had many moments of this, and it felt amazing and I want more!
Powers I want.
The superpowers of knowing how great I am, shining a light, taking space for myself, combining wildness and wonder.
The Salve of Glowingly Unapologetic about the Fullness and Richness of Me.
This salve is like the sensory version of a mantra, cycling through the bloodstream, repeating its own name until its essence becomes the stream, and everything else is called into support of this truth.
When I wear this salve, my bell essence — my suchness — is in full flower, and is welcomed with love, because this is what I expect, and anyone who can’t meet me with acceptance and joy doesn’t get to be in my life, ta da, and suddenly this is easy because it is clear and it is simple and it just is.
Playing live at the meme beach house — the Fake Band of the Week!
This week’s band comes from Agent Ravenstar:
Averse To Choreography
Their latest album is Where All The Cute Boys And Girls Hang Out, and this band is just one guy.
Announcement time….
More to come soon, but I left the monster manual in the place that used to be the the shop. So if you missed the closing of the shop, there is still something beautiful for you!
How was your week?
Come play in the comments. Share something from your week, take a breath, or just say hi! No rules, my format doesn’t have to be yours, we’ve been doing this every week for years now and there still isn’t a right way.
Everyone belongs. We let people have their own experience. We’re supportive and welcoming. We lovingly refrain from giving advice.
And of course it’s always okay to comment under a made-up name, whether for play and delight, or in the interest of Safety First.
Wishing you a glorrrrrrrrrrrrious day, a restful weekend and a happy week to come.
It’s fine if it’s not Friday anymore. There’s complete chicken amnesty — jump in whenever you like. Blowing kisses to the Beloved Lurkers too!
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The salve of glowingly unapologetic about the fullness and richness of me has been working its magic, and I didn’t even know about it. I’m hearing from inside myself that it’s time for a conversation 20 years late, except it won’t be, because as you say all timing is right timing.
I tried something new, got scared, and settled in to acceptance of growth and stretching.
A moderate grief wave briefly washed over me this morning before receding behind biking endorphins and sunshine.
Today is the fifth day in a row I’ve spent some time among some flavor of my people, and the presence of that community keeps spackling holes I didn’t know were there.
The lake is beautiful and cyclists taking over a major throughway on a Sunday morning is wondrous.
If I listed all the changes and shifts this week, I would be astonished at how many packed into seven days.
Speaking of growth, one night a bean was deep beneath the soil and 24 hours later was 3 inches tall. Even non-magic beans are magical.
delight for beans!! I hope to plant beans tomorrow.
Mmmmm, I am *appreciating* this week’s salve!
This week’s hard stuff:
-Someone I love dearly is depressed and troubled, and…oh, it’s just hard. On everyone.
-Money Monsters: The Sequel. This is definitely one of those lame and derivative sequels, and perhaps I can find a clue or two in *that*.
Good stuff:
+A happy and magical day trip, shared with someone special.
+I have henna waiting patiently for whenever I decide to play with it.
+My feelings have shifted, and something that had me feeling sad and scared now has me feeling excited and hopeful. It’s such a relief, letting this land!
I now invoke the superpower of CALMS (thanks again, Magic!)
*grins* Warmest wishes (and of course CALMS) to you, lovely!
I also loved reading that you have henna awaiting… A group of women in the hills used to get together once a month for ‘Chenna’ (champagne and henna–I don’t drink so the champagne part was clearly not the big draw) and it was just divine having a gaggle of women laugh and henna each other’s hair! So I’m also wishing you all the spiritedness that can go with henna-ing *smiles*
Oh, sequels. *sigh*. My monsters sometimes notice a lame sequel and then deride me about how lame it is.
Thanks for the wording!
This week has been stupidly hard. I’m almost collapsing under the weight of it *sad face* Yet as Nela referenced recently, this space just helps.
The Horridly Grim
~ accumulation of Spain and it’s just Getting. Too. Much.
~ Aloneness that exacerbates Spain
~ fear and mistrust that exacerbates Aloneness
~ severe loss of energy over all of the above
The Delightful
~ I made tiny thankyou blessing cards to give to people to thank them for sweet kindnesses—it was a way of expressing gratitude beyond what I do verbally, as well as explaining the blessing further and speaking of Energy in ways that mainstreamers do not… AND one I gave to a pharmacist from the chemist I used to attend because when I was at the peak of an injury and on horrid pain medication, I would go to this large, busy pharmacy, dying of shame and pain, and this beautiful pharmacist would just smile at me, even if she wasn’t serving me. So nearly a year later, I went back to thank her and give her one of my tiny blessing cards. I explained how much it had meant, when I was flailing so badly, feeling so vulnerable judged, but her smile was like this tiny beacon of kindness in a sea of shame. She welled up with tears and in her thick accent, told me that was the most beautiful thing EVER, which actually also made me a bit sad, but I also loved that it landed just right. And THEN she told me that she smiled at me because I looked like an “American star”! I don’t quite know what that is, but it seems a movie star (which is kind of funny, as I don’t even own a television) and “so beautiful”. And although I just went there to thank her for something that meant so much, it was like it turned into this bigger and most beautiful Thing, and I left there beaming, knowing my blessing (“May your kindness be returned tenfold”) had exactly come true!
(Gaa, apologies for uber long post)
Thank you for this lovely reminder about what a blessing a tiny beacon of kindness can be! <3!
*smiles* Thanks Sue… this was the only space I could tell anyone that story
It’s a wonderful, heart-overflowing story…I needed the reminder, too. <3
Wow, this so makes me choke up. Heartfelt thanks to both of you for the Connectedness *smiles through tears*
<3
I had a pharmacist like that once, and I would go in with the same pain and shame and she would smile her blessings down on me, and not judge me when I felt like that was all my doctors were doing and it made such a difference. I loved your story because it made me remember.
Wow, thankyou. It’s like we’re in such a raw space, and this tiny gift, given unwittingly, just shines through all that harshness and judgement, both internal and external.
My heartfelt thanks for your feedback… and kind pharmacists!
Over the years, I’ve had a number of pharmacists like that and they all worked the night shift at whatever 24-hour pharmacy I was using at the time. The day shift workers seem more matter of fact and no time to chat or find out more about the situation and the needs. Once I had a question about how to administer some medication and the day pharmacist said “just put it in his nebulizer” and when I said he didn’t have one, the pharmacist just shrugged and turned away. Because it was important that he get this particular medicine THAT day, I left in tears and as soon as I could talk, I called the nurse who worked with the thoracic surgeon and she was kind and helpful and I never went back to that pharmacy. The end.
I wish now that I’d done something like that for the kind and helpful ones. I plan to do something for the two that I see at night now. Thank you for the idea.
It’s beautiful that in the midst of horrible things, you’re taking the time to intentionally express gratitude. It’s inspiring and touching, and I’m glad you’ve decided to share it with us.
<3 and hoping for things to become well
!!! <3 <3 <3
Hard this week:
– Uptick in excitement and productivity with work resulted in some self-care things flying out the window. A breath for finding a rhythm that sustains.
– A friend in need, and I'm not sure how to help. A breath for spaciousness, and for love, and for not wanting to be pushy or engage in any WUSIT but trying to figure out when to actually be concerned.
Wonderful this week:
– Excitement and productivity with work! Joy and delight with work! This is new for me, I've done much "work" (on all the levels) to get here, and I am simultaneously bubbling with energy and trying to just breathe gratitude for how things are coming together.
– "Working" on multiple levels, and feeling so much stronger in all ways.
– I feel I've been getting hints and sniffs of this week's salve, and I LIKE IT, and I'm ready for more. Bring on the vats, the baths, the cocktails. 😉
Good chicken to all. Love and gratitude for this space, this community. <3
Rhythms that sustain, yes!
Oh, week, you are done and we are chickening.
The Hard:
Bugs that bit me. Over and over while I could do nothing but tramp on. Today has been a day of various poultices and tendings and sitting with the sensation of my immune system reacting to these bites. I cannot scratch because I would never stop.
Staying at a hostel which was hard and delightful but the hard was too hard to stay a second night (a hot room, a midnight cough-er, no where I could just be alone, showers that seemed like my long arms would hit the walls) and so I came home.
Missing out on a longer hike due to heat, bugs and forgetting my lunch at the hostel.
The Delightful:
I have the ability to sit on a porch and talk to strangers and share wine with them, and then pile into a truck with them and go for burgers and not feel like I need to escape. This is my superpower.
A hostel in the right place and with the right price and a private room that I can book if I remember ahead of time which will solve all my problems there.
I have the ability to move my body up and over a mountain, while it physically breaks down, and mentally the blocks start to tumble and then I pick it all back up again and put things in the right place, or an even better place. And I can do this in the terrible heat, with the kittens swarming about, and a rock wall in front of me that I have to climb. This is my other superpower.
A cat sitter who turns on the air conditioner before my arrival. A thousand blessings on her.
Going running the day after a hike. A breath for strong legs and breaths.
Crazy magical superpowers!
Kind greetings, fellow people
What has been hard?
Egads, this level of the video game is … serious. Tiring. That’s about it and plenty.
What has helped?
Rituals, Breaths. Listening. Trust, as much as I possibly can and maybe more. Trust is the name of the game here.
Space. This I’d like to explore more in the upcoming week. What does it mean to give or make space for myself?
Sleep.
What can I ask for?
I have not used Superpowers much thus far… still figuring out how they may work. Perhaps I will experiment. Perhaps superpowers are vibrant colors/tastes/textures I infuse into [ ] like spices into soup. First I invoke the Superpower of Superpowers!!!
Also, noting tradeoffs between [x] and [y] in terms of safety, not –amount– of safety so much as –quality/character–. Lots of intel there
Finally, RAIN!! (shh, don’t scare it…)
Yes, Superpower of Superpowers! The Jupiter of Superpowers maybe?! I think I need this too… The Inductress of Superpowering!
(Now I’m going to stop annoying everyone with endless comments, so just retreating into silence with gentle wishes to all *grins and blushes*)
Jupiter of Superpowers: LOVE IT!!! it’s a THEME SONG!!! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Nz0b4STz1lo (esp 2:54)
Whoa. I think everything might be OK.
Oh that’s insane! (You even made me break my comment refrain! *grins*)
Here’s to Alignment…
Aw, Magic! I was hoping for one of your encouraging comments on my comment.
This has been a week of ups and downs, fortunately ending on a positive note.
Hard:
– MrB is on his 16th day of being in the hospital, and it’s the second time this month!
– Watching him suffer. Watching him dread when they come to draw blood or change his IV. The man whose tolerance for pain was high and whose pain threshold was high doesn’t have that superpower anymore; it’s been eroded by endless pokes and jabs. Breaks my heart.
– Serious kidney failure happened Wednesday; they are trying to treat it medically and will have to do a biopsy next week and then maybe dialysis.
– Not being listened to and not being kept informed.
– Not being able to make things better.
– Uncomfortable furniture in uncomfortable rooms and the endless noise of television
– Spain.
– Loneliness, especially at night. I sometimes feel his presence and the knowledge that he’s not there hurts so much.
– The sudden sense of the presence of my (dead) son, though very brief and tenuous, was not comforting.
– No time for activities and comforts: missing all the beautiful weather, missing the art fair, not getting to the library or the bookstore or the cafe.
– Self care has been hit or miss.
– I misunderstood something that my sister said and it scared me.
The Not-So-Hard and the Good:
+ They finally put in a PICC line so no more needles in the arm. MrB was really cheered up by that.
+ Support from internet friends. They are the best.
+ I finally spent a few hours on the porch yesterday.
+ This evening I did a special thing of putting some things where they belong (in the den), and it was a prayer and incantation for MrB to be back where he belongs (also in the den).
+ Help from my brother, standing by to keep me from falling.
+ Being able to do ONE of the usual things: The last weekend of the month, I do “deacon duty” and I did that today and I got to sit in Bible Study where there are people who’ve been through similar things and one of them is the widower of my dear friend JL. Their love and support means so much.
Ohh Vicki, I laughed at your initial comment and knew I’d have to break my refrain especially for you, and then I kept reading and my heart just so went out to you. So. Much. Ongoing. Hard.
I really liked the ritual of Putting Things Where They Belong and [fractal flowering]. I shalt try that too.
Much Gentleness to you and Mr B.
<3 <3 <3
Love and wishes for ease and health to you and MrB.
cluck cluck.
What is this insane week.
The hard:
+ Approximately seven trillion hours of travel
+ Sleep schedule completely and utterly EFFED.
+ Having zero appetite the first few days of the week and then having triple appetite the latter half. What’s going on, body?
+ Surprise Jewel is…… very much a surprise and ugh ugh ugh all my usual stuff is showing up really hard and while I got to be curious and conscious sometimes, I also just spent a lot of time grinding wheels and being abducted by all the scariest “what if” monsters. It is only as I am typing this that I understand that, hi, this is also very normal, and I don’t have to instantly transcend and transform the patterns that I’d been carrying my entire life just because I’m slightly smarter now, okay, like god, legitimacy please, can I get to be human.
+ due to events, I was taken away from my [dance] for an entire week and only now am I beginning to come back to the [dance]. this was disorienting and hard.
The good:
+ SURPRISE JEWEL.
+ I got sunned because surprise beach day with surprise jewel and my skin is bronzed and my hand healed and everything is refreshed and better.
+ SURPRISE JEWEL holy crap it is so stunning and I cannot even handle it.
+ I have so many great new books on my shelf, I also cannot handle that either.
+ I wanted lots and lots and lots of solitude and silence and stillness to process surprise jewel and i GOT IT and it was marvelous. I never ever take solitude and silence and stillness for granted and it was delicious and precious.
+ hours and hours of the best processing conversations with two of my favorite agents. no, three! a trillion kisses blown in Havi’s direction for creating the best community on earth.
+ there is a way yearning and anticipation and not-having can just feel clean and beautiful and sexy instead of painful, and I got to access some of it this week, and I want more of that in the coming weeks.
+ I had left [dance] but when I came back to it after many days of absence, it was still there for me and inviting and seductive and marvelous as ever. Everything that is mine comes back to me.
+ just mainly drunk from surprise jewel, so much is good.
<3
That salve… So, so needed. Thank you.
The past week has been pretty challenging for me, and I’m still not sure if I know what it all means.
What worked: revolutionizing my weekly intention setting. I’ve put in the non-negotiable stuff, lunch, rest breaks and fun stuff in the calendar first, and then filled in the gaps with work I wanted to do. There weren’t many gaps left, and I learned to be OK with that.
Next time I might… Take Period Day into the account in the above mentioned process.
The hard:
~~~ The Situation that has escalated to the point of me calling a lawyer. Still in shock and anxious over this. The triggering of my safety issues. So much about this Situation is painful, and it’s difficult for me to see at the moment all the ways my life is good and trust that it will all be OK.
~~~ Burned all my sketches and notes related to The Situation to get rid of potential liability. I’ve never done that before because I value my sketches, but it felt like the right thing to do. Our whole house filled up with smoke – not sure how to interpret that if it was a sign. House still has the faint smell of smoke.
~~~ Period Day forced me into bed rest again. I had things planned for that day, and I’m not happy that I didn’t get to do it. Also, being in pain just sucks.
~~~ I called people because I needed someone to talk to while I was anxious about The Situation, and I thought I was clear that was why I was calling, and I was also clear about already knowing what I would do, but people still resorted to advice giving and sentences that start with “here’s what I think you should do…” I’m not sure where I’ve given the wrong impression that I wanted advice, and whether this is something I can fix on my end.
~~~ The sounds of construction work that wake me up in the morning and unannounced water outages. Sigh.
~~~ Skipped my art practice on Period Day and for the weekend because I’ve felt so unwell. Guilt monsters that I’m using this as an excuse and must press on.
~~~ Going for a drink with Ds friends is never a good idea. Hungover all day long, which didn’t help me feel better about The Situation.
The good:
××× From a thrifty DIY person, I’ve suddenly become the sort of person who hires a lawyer. I wouldn’t have done it if I wasn’t pushed to my wits end (there’s a theme to that), but now I feel great about this, and I’ve realized this solves my problem of not ever wanting to hear from the other person again – they can contact my lawyer instead. Wow. This is completely new to me.
××× Clearing my office from the energy of The Situation felt great.
××× Loving support from friends and colleagues from all over the world. People offering to help me in practical ways.
××× Doing art first thing in the morning is fulfilling on so many levels, and I’m so glad that I’ve restarted this practice. I hope this continues.
××× I had actual rest breaks this week, wheee!
××× A super favorable Tarot reading. This gives me hope that there’s something wonderful waiting for me at the other end of The Situation.
××× Beach day and the gorgeous Mediterranean plant smell all around that felt like it was healing something inside of me.
Superpower I want: Feeling Endlessly Supported All The Time. And some CALMS would be nice, too.
Sequels! I have a sequel too, though in my case I think it may turn out to be far tighter, enjoyable and better edited than episodes I and II. A breath for being in the moment.
Bank holiday. I slept for eleven hours last night and I think that a nap this afternoon and retiring early tonight wouldn’t go amiss either. A breath for rest.
I want to write out my ideal schedule, but I’m scared it might make me cry. A breath for time.
STUDY no longer equals DUSTY. A breath for my space.
David Attenborough clip about a raven who knows which stone is his. A breath for the physical world.
It turns out that there is plenty to eat in the house. A breath for abundance.
Packet cheesecake. A breath for sweetness, frivolity, nostalgia.
Next time I’m going to reclaim nine o’clock.
BRAN THE RAVEN IS SO COOL!!
Whoooosh – that was the sound of last week passing by.
The hard:
– The time distortions. I can’t remember what I did a week ago and it seems like an eternity ago. Time seems to be moving with an ever increasing speed and I can’t keep up but at the same time it seems to stand still. It’s a complicated relationship.
– Not knowing what to do to get a residence permit for my Kurdish-Iranian husband. Should we stay in Denmark and try applying her even though the application most likely will be denied or should we just move to Sweden right away?
– Having to spend most of Sunday afternoon in an crowded zoo with my parents, my brother, his wife and my two nephews. Too much noise, too many smells and the sadness of seeing the caged-up animals, especially the orangutans. So tired.
The good:
– Traveling went incredibly fine. Even though we had to get up so early everything went smoothly. We had plenty of time to eat breakfast and get coffee at the central station before boarding the bus and on the bus everyone was really quiet. I didn’t get car sick and I was even able to watch videos on my iPad.
– Seeing my family and hanging out with my nephews who are absolutely in love with their new uncle.
– Having deep and intense conversations about the future with my husband and getting more and more clear ideas about what I want both for myself and for us as a couple.
Monday chicken and cluck!
So much to say! Nothing is wrong and much is good!
Last weekend I went to a beltane gathering, on a beautiful site near Colo Spgs, with hotshowers and a meal plan, and it was wall to wall gifts.
the sparkle:
-beautiful weather
-comfort! the heated cabin was nice, the bathroom was rght there
-i got to go shopping and buy wonderful yummy things
-i got to serve
-i got to party like i havent done in a loooooong time
-magick every minute
-the Starfield!
-ecstatic mad joy and consorting with Pan
-a day off follwoing
-a sudden shift in all my addictions. Since returning i have cleaned up my diet and got far closer to sober
I am so blissed out and grateful. there are little dysfucntions i wanbt to remedy, but mostly everything is smooth sailing.
-o-
~ to all of you…
May was the Month of ALL THE THINGS, and it’s soon coming to an end. It was also the Month of unexpected exhaustion, making new place familiar, all the birthdays (including my own), lifting heavy things, and forgetting all the words.
Next time I might:
– Schedule non-negotionalble recovery time.
– Remember to eat.
– Sleep more.
– Come here more often <3
– Ask for help sooner
Good stuffs:
– Went to a real-life party that was just like this place. We all got stuff, sometimes we crash and burn, but kittens and holding space will always save the day. It was hard, yet safe and beautiful.
– Connecting snouts and dots all over the place.
– playing guitar again! – both metaphorically and literary.
– Occasionally being able to put my most patient, knowledgeable and warmest self forward in difficult conversations in stead of just dissapearing into … well, something else…
– Asking for help actually helps, and all timing actually IS right timing. This never stops to amaze me.
– This was the month of seeing the connections. The vulnerability and treasure in all people. We're all just messy bundles of stuffs, stories and different perceptions of nows. And it's all very real to each and every one of us (of course this is common knowledge). But the polot twist is that I've been able to feel it again. After shutting that knowing out for so long, just to survive. And this time it didn't break me. I somehow managed not to take on everybody else's pain. This month I was from time to time granted the superpower of holding space and seeing people where they are. It made all the difference.
– I had the strangest experience, of hugging a person who culture tells me that a) does not see me as a person/human being b) actually would have refused to even greet me in the standard way dictated by the society we are both living in. Because of a) I am not fully human. I love surprises!
Wow. That was a lot.
<3 – everyone!