Personal ads. They’re … personal! Very.
Each week I write these VPAs to practice asking for what I want. And to get clarity on what that really is, even when asking feels conflicted.
I always get useful information about my relationship with various aspects of the ask. Join in if you like!
Happy Sunday, you guys!
I’m still in Denver (well, outside of Denver), but will be back soon-ish.
What do we want to ask for this week? Let’s find out.
Thing 1: For a challenging decision to resolve itself.
Here’s what I want:
Come on, decision! What if this decision could just figure itself out instead of someone (me) having to make it?
That would be really great.
Ways this could work:
I can do Shiva Nata on it, of course.
And use my mini marathon-training session (shhhhh, that’s a proxy!).
Rest on it, sleep on it, use the force.
My commitment.
To practice trust. Trust, trust and more trust.
Whichever way this goes is the way it will go, and it will either be the right decision or it will give me useful information about the next decision.
Thing 2: Oh, fractal flowers.
Here’s what I want:
Right now I have four different projects that all need my love and attention. They’re all related, and I know that working on one will have positive effects on the others.
That’s the part about the fractal flowers.
But I need to remember this. And I want to play with it more consciously.
Ways this could work:
Again, those mini marathon-training sessions. To music. With an eye pillow. Yes.
Also, I can talk to slightly future me. And interview the projects.
And generally act like I’m on Rally (Rally!).
My commitment.
To notice flowers everywhere.
To plant secret wishes.
To throw everything into the pot.
Thing 3: Fifteen mini-newts!
Here’s what I want:
Sometimes I forget to do my (wink!) mini marathon-training sessions. Even though they are vital to everything else that needs to happen.
I forget that they make everything better.
So I am trying to do a 90 second mini marathon-training session every fifteen mini-newts.
And to do a longer one at 18 minutes past the hour. If/when I remember.
And to do a song’s worth of mini marathon-training before and after each activity. Ugh, activity. What a horrid word. Where’s metaphor mouse? Okay, I need to rename that.
Anyway, this whole thing was going really well, but it’s been hard to maintain while traveling. I need more of this.
Ways this could work:
B could remind me. In code!
I could set a special reminder on my phone?
The number fifteen could magically become fun. Or maybe I need to switch the numbers?
I don’t know.
My commitment.
To remember that I’m allowed to have fun with this.
In fact, it kind of has to be fun or it won’t work.
To remember that this is a glorrrrrrious experiment, and whatever happens is useful information.
To take notes about what helps and why.
Thing 4: Recovery…
Here’s what I want:
I sort of forgot how much I can’t handle traveling. Even though I took a break from flying places for a year.
Sometimes I think it’s not the being-places so much as the getting there.
But really? It’s all of it.
My entire body is sore and miserable right now. And that’s despite all the lovely things that Barrington planned — like two marvelous massages, and all the baths and going to the pool.
I really need my bed. And the other beautiful, reassuring, comforting, peaceful structures and forms (both symbolic and real) that hold up my life.
Plus I’ll have less than a week to prepare myself for the Great Ducking Out, so I need this recovery time to happen speedily and smoothly.
Ways this could work:
Wally. Wally can help. And Barrington too, of course.
Also music.
Also returning to sweet, sweet, blessed routine as soon as possible.
And getting back to Portland where things are green, and there is oxygen. I’m pretty sure that will help.
Ah, physical proof that my surroundings are pulsing with the life force.
But really, I need uninterrupted time and space to come back to myself.
My commitment.
To slow everything down.
More conscious entry. More loving exits.
More spaciousness for my poor body and for this entire experience.
Thing 5: Shivanauticon!
Here’s what I want:
Only the most exciting thing in the entire world.
Shivanauticon! The Unconventional.
It’s like a convention, except way more fun.
In August.
I need to start the process of announcing. And there are all sorts of bits and pieces that need to fall into place for that to happen.
Ways this could work:
Hmmm.
I could whisper-brunch the Hey-this-is-coming page.
The website: Shivanauticon.com, of course.
Or I could put up the bare minimum of details.
And I can ask the Enthusiastic for help.
My commitment.
To have at least one surreptitious rendezvous with one of my partners in crime.
Planning sessions interspersed with shivanautical flailing.
To fill up on love and make a secret room for this.
Progress report on past Very Personal Ads.
Just to update you on what’s happened since last time.
Let’s see! I wanted a perfect, simple solution to finding a stage-like thing for my workshop in Boulder, and it totally happened. Liz was able to borrow a riser from her son’s school and bring it to the studio. Thank you.
I also wanted consolidation and Revue for recovering from the Olympics, and that happened too.
Then I needed to magically create the Page That Could Not Be Mentioned Except By Proxy in time for the roller derby championships.
And it happened!
Do you want to see it? It’s here: ShivaNata.com/derby.
Also the full-page ad in the program that sent people there? Gorgeous. It looked just the way I wanted it to. Which is its own medium-sized miracle.
And I wanted recommendations for a speaker system for the Playground. Got a few but would be happy for some more.
Play-filled comment zen. Here’s what I’d love today.
- Wanted: Your own personal ads, small or large. Updates on past ones if you like.
- You can also do these on your own or in your head. You can always call silent retreat!
- Leave your gwishes! Throw things in the pot!
- Things we try to keep away from: the word “manifest”, telling people how they should be asking for things, unsolicited advice.
- VPA amnesty applies, of course. Leave yours any time between now and next Sunday (or whenever, really) — it’s all fine by us!
xox
p.s. We always need stickers for the arts & crafts room at the Playground, so if you have any you could send our way, that would be wonderful.
Packages for the Playground can be sent care of:
The Fluent Self, Inc.
1526 NE Alberta St. #218
Portland, OR 97211
United States
Thank you!
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Thing 1: Only paradise. No biggie.
What I want:
This is a long term goal, but I have been dreaming of the day when I can turn my property into a kid-friendly, dog-friendly, Edible Forest Garden with mostly plants native to this region, designed using permaculture philosophies AND Japanese gardening aesthetic techniques. But really. No big deal.
Ways it could work:
I could just start planting stuff and learn from my choices.
I could win the lottery (ha! I’d have to play first) and hire someone to design it for me (I even have someone in mind!), then I can do the implementation.
I could barter for help with different phases of the project.
I am committing to:
Reading (books and online), walking the property, envisioning, looking into some classes, drawing pictures, taking notes, maintaining and nurturing contacts in the Japanese Gardening and permaculture communities. And some flailing.
Thing 2: Relationship epiphanies. I don’t ask for much, do I?
What I want:
To understand the evolution of friendships that seem to be in a cooling off phase. Is it a natural progression of them and me slowly growing apart? Or am I putting out some kind of vibe that pushes people away? Am I just becoming more self-sufficient? Or am I withdrawing slowly into another depression without realizing it?
Ways it could work:
I could have the perfect conversation with one of the friends (or with others who are as solidly in my life as they ever were) and everything could become clear.
I could reach out to them instead of waiting for them to reach out to me.
I am committing to:
Meditating on it. Drinking lots of tea. Feeding cheese puffs to the monsters so they don’t start a riot when I’m trying to think clearly about my part in all of this. Remembering that other people have their own busy lives. Cherishing the friendships that I have, however close or distant. Talking to someone who knows me well enough to be honest and loving all at the same time. And some flailing. 🙂
Here’s what I want:
More sustainability built into how I do my secret mission in general and also this one aspect of the mission that I am putting out into the world this week.
Ways this could work:
I could keep asking the room of creativity (because creativity is already naturally sustainable) what to do at each step as I put this sparkling new thing out there.
I could remember that I don’t have to do it alone. I can ask for help.
I could remember that even when I’m not asking for help, I’m still not doing it alone.
I could remember that Havi said that growth is exponential and trust that.
Ha! Seeing how I believe that with more growth I’d naturally have more sustainability I could then extrapolate to see that I already have sustainability. And sustainability is inherently sustainable so if I have some I have enough. There is no “more”. Which blows my mind and changes my want. Going to Shiva Nata on that one.
My commitment:
To create a ritual that reminds me to fill this moment with sustainability.
I’m seeing that usually when I want something I already have it but I don’t believe I have it so I can’t fully experience it. It sits just outside of my forcefield. So I commit to exploring new ways of working with this pattern. Inviting things in! Oh yes inviting things in! I commit to invite things IN.
I had to look up last weeks VPA because I forgot what it was – at least consciously. Subconsciously it must have been there because I did a good job of pacing myself and wasn’t completely trashed by the weekend. In fact, I had a very productive day Saturday.
This week’s ask is for compassion. Especially towards my boss. I’m carrying around a lot of resentment because once again I’m running our program mostly by myself despite promises made by her that it would get better when she stepped down as chair. Surprise, it has not. She is facing a lot of crap both on the home front and work front and is very close to a meltdown.
My ask is for compassion and acceptance of the situation.
How this could work is that I could remember all those times when I was completely burnout. I could project compassion towards her instead of wallowing in my resentment. After all, nothing is going to change as far as my work load goes, the only thing I can change in my attitude about the situation.
My commitment is to have a positive attitude in the face of adversity. To vent to my few trusted sources. To proceed with the initiatives that I think are best for our program despite the perceived lack of support from my boss.
Mmmm, Hi,VPA! It’s been a while.
This semester, which has been highly unpleasant all around and which I have been whining and grumbling the entire way throughout, is coming to an end. Loose ends need to be tied up. Without agony, without extra grumbling. I’m not going to go as far as to say WITH LOVE, because that is just honestly not going to happen.
Yes, next week. A bunch of things have to get done, as well as preparing for Rally, which is OMG ALREADY ALMOST HERE. I’m too overwhelmed to start thinking about that. I feel weird at work. I want to not feel weird at work anymore. This will be easy, actually. I know exactly what to do.
I sort of gave up trying to do rituals. Making rituals happen require a degree of mindfulness and peace and there-ness that I have just not had in so long. Being in school DOES NOT SUPPORT my rituals and mental health and happiness. This needs to go in the book of me. Avoid institutions of formal education until I don’t have to. REMEMBER WHAT IT DOES TO YOU. (baaad things.)
Hypnosis. It is magical and utterly amazing and also very difficult and elusive. (Kind of like shiva nata?)I want to have a better relationship with my practice. I need ROOM to do this. Physical room, yes, but emotional and schpiritual and energetic room to HOLD my practice. (My Rally project, maybe?)
This is sort of turning into a free-form woem/chicken, but er, let me just say that I continue to long and wish for TRUST and Russian novels and lots of family time. Because that makes everything better.
Oh, and love! That makes everything better too.
Just last night I was looking at a bowl of stickers sitting on my counter.
I was (g)wishing I had someone to give them to. Because my 4 kids are getting older and not using stickers. And I moved into a tiny house recently. So tiny that a bowl of stickers takes up way too much room and was starting to get on my nerves.
I thought, “Who could possibly want a bunch of stickers?! I’ll probably have to throw them out.”
And this morning, here it is. A use for my stickers! Yay! Hooray for Very Personal Ads!
Mine was just a silent gwish and you answered it! I’ll ship them off soon. (No guarantees on type or theme of this 15 year miscellaneous collection!)
whoooooosh and now all my schtuff lives in a storage unit in Denver and my Mom and I live in her house in Puerto Morelos, MX.
Crazy.
Last week was a whirlwind of crazy — getting here and nothing worked (not the car, not the hot water, not the screens on the windows, not the phones/tv/internet, not the propane, NOTHING) and the day after Mom and I arrived my Aunt came to “visit”…. It was crazy. She left yesterday and my sister-in-law comes tomorrow.
I’m trying to catch my breathe.
What I want this week: Breathing would be good. Also less frantic and more ocean. Less answering questions about what I’m going to do for the rest of my life and more thinking about it and letting it come to me. Less worrying about the speed at which our money for Mexico is dwindling and more trust that this is just how it goes in the beginning and it will slow down. Less of my Mom feeling coughy and sick and more of her enjoying her house and her love for this place. Less stress about the crazy non-stop NOISE of Mexico and more love for what the noise represents — people living life with color and ooommmph! Sleep would also be much appreciated. Also, wayyyyyyyyyyy more writing! I’m behind on my NaNoWriMo word count (but I expected that) and I would like for my sister-in-law to not want to be entertained and to be ok with staying with my mamacita while I get some hours to myself to write write write. Other things I want to do but haven’t yet: Shiva Nata, joining the yoga class on the beach on M,W,F, and visiting the ocean every day, rain or shine. Because duh, it’s the ocean.
My committment is to be open to letting things happen, to practice keeping my heart open and finding the joy in each minute, even if it doesn’t involve anything I really really really want to be doing and to remember to be grateful for this opportunity to spend this time with my Mom in this place we both love.
And I love THIS Fluent Self place too! xoxoxo all around. So sad I missed Shiva Nata in Denver/Boulder. Embarrassed that wherever Havi stayed didn’t understand vegetarian. And now I feel like I have to defend Colorado! We aren’t all meat eating hicks, I swear!!!
Hello Week!
Hello Havi!
Hello fellow VPA championeers and Friday Chickeneers of the High Seas!
@ Havi – oh now i am sooo intrigued about the newts. I am reading through the code and letting my brain be shiva-nata-fied / epiphanified by pretending I already know what they are. The same way I used to learn words in foreign languagues – just keep reading and pretend you know what the story is all about. So much more to read about that way . (although I have a sneaking suspicion we might hear more about them on the blog, which would be awesome).
*** Update ***
I read back two previous VPA’s as well as the “goodbye October”. I am taking loose ends and re-vamp-ing/re-vpa-ing/re-vpam-ing them.
*** What worked ***
– I wanted to move and found an amazing new route to run along of a perfect 10 kilometers. So excited now about the way ahead.
– I wanted a new perspective on things and got a wonderful chat with my uncle, who is great at listening.
– I even created a start for ‘the Room of Requirements’.
*** Re-vpam-ed Thing 1: Secret Agent Mission ***
I want to make a phone call. Badly. It’s about reconnecting with an important old friend. It’s important and I am completely stuck. So this needs more attention.
Ways it could work: I could spend some time writing about it, writing a script, setting up boundaries in my mind. It could go lovely. The pone call could flow. I could use the phone call to set up a live appointment.
My commitment: to take it step by step. to take some time to talk to monsters. to acknowledge the fear and pain. also: to want what I want. to interact with this wall and see what it will tell me. to take this creatively.
*** Re-vpam-ed Thing 2: A story end scene
I have been working with ‘plot’ and ‘narrative’ books this month since I wanted a story ending. It’s not completely there yet.
Ways it could work: I could actually take time out to do some exercizes from these books. I could look up story endings from favourite movies and books.
My commitment: to have fun with it. To remember it is all practice but also to remember I care deeply about this stuff. To listen to my writer self. To trust as much as I can trust that the story will fall into place. It all will.
*** Thing 3: Dinner Party ***
All my best friends are going to be in one place. So exciting. I want to throw a dinner party and I want it to be chilled.
Ways it could work: I could spend time preparing. They could join in setting it up. The atmosphere could just be magical. I could wear my Hosting Hat.
My commitment: to prepare. to enjoy. to set boundaries before and during and be my big sis self. To blow fairy dust around the table.
*** Goodbye! ***
That was a long one. It feels so good to write it down. Thanks for the VPA space to Havi!
Byeeee
PS
@Kim – I recently stored up my schtuff and moved back to my mom’s!! The only confusing part turned out to be the people’s opinions part. Once that moved to the background it started to be just amazing. Family, home, tea, etc. Best decision ever. 🙂 So that’s just to say hear! hear! & cheers cheers to living in the family home 🙂
Whoa my goodness it’s Sunday!
UPDATE on VPAs from 2 weeks ago: Thing #1 has been going well, but Thing #2 just went kablooie. Though interestingly, my commitment to being okay with dropping it? That worked 😉 I think I still have time to pull it out, though.
This week’s VPAs:
Thing #1 – To Maintain the Motivation for the Lovelyman’s Arrival.
It is now 20 days until the designated arrival. We’re both incredibly freaked out but wildly excited at the same time. I need to keep going and not let my freaking out slow me down.
Ways This Could Work:
– The bloom of my life could keep unfolding like it has been!
– I could find some help.
– My hips could stop being such a pain in the ass. (nyuk, nyuk.)
My Commitment:
– To keep allowing myself the small pieces that lead to the large. (Fractal flowers!)
– To keep removing what can be removed.
– To breathe it all in.
– To enjoy the goosebumps and *squee* moments.
Thing #2 – To Have a Solution for the Magically Misaligning Hips.
Everything I want to do is now held hostage by the pain in my hips. It has taken me a good 5 hours to get this far in VPAs because I can’t sit at my desk chair for very long and my re-alignment lie-downs require me to be face down on the bed or floor. This also means I can’t practice Shiva Nata! Aigh! So I want a more permanent solution to the pain.
Ways This Could Work:
– I could have a flash of inspiration.
– I could find my chiro blocks.
– I could get a windfall that would allow me to afford to go to a doctor/chiro.
My Commitment:
– To release resentment surrounding my current non-insured state.
– To be gentle with myself.
– To rest whenever I need to.
Thing #3 – To Get My Work Mojo Back.
Due to many Things Beyond My Control, the work situation has been a bit hairy. I’ve been distracted and it’s been difficult to keep my creativity up the way it was when I started. I want some of that mojo back.
Ways This Could Work:
– I could tap into my inherent excitement about the project.
– I could get inspiration from my co-workers.
– I could get the marvelous lightningstrike.
My Commitment:
– To keep playing with the project.
– To designate space to sit and think.
– To be okay with my own work-rhythm.
* * *
Sending tons of well-wishes to everyone and best of luck for your VPAs!!
Last week I wanted to work on raising my expectations for myself, and some resolution towards a friend issue. Both are in progress, through some of my action and some natural movement of things. This is good. I would like to continue the ad for both, since they are both longer termed projects.
I would also like to just put a blank ad out there about the whole Boy thing. I’m just leaving this up to the universe to answer. I don’t know who, or how or when. I but I would like it to be. Please.
Going to four different states this week (not counting layovers) on four different days and would like to not experience transit shock, forget who I am, where i am or why I went there.
2 new 3 old and 3 held. May the new want to come and the old want to stay and the held reveal themselves.
Culture. Clarity. Communication. Conviction. Courage.
I have had mini progress that I can actually see while I work on my big awesome goals.
Therefore, the thing I want is to keep seeing this mini-progress and recognizing it for what it is instead of being frustrated because I think I’m not making progress.
WTCW: I don’t know how, but I have to open my eyes more. I can pay attention to what’s going on around me. Keep taking those little baby steps towards making my dreams a reality and find the ways that they show me they are slowly becoming a reality.
My commitment: to keep going with the baby steps.
Other VPA thing: is the same as last week… talking to my professor about the final was enough one on one questions for me… i don’t know why one on one is so hard for me, but being on stage isn’t. So, I will be asking my professor for a letter of recommendation. *Fingers crossed* also will be following through on sending him the link to post the letter of recommendation after asking him.
What I want: I want to bring more appreciation into my life for all the goodness. I want this to feel easy and not forceful, and sincere but not too cheesy.
How this could work: I could note things I appreciate in my head, out loud, out loud to other people, or in written form. I could ask other people about what sorts of things they appreciate. Perhaps I could write about ways to do this that don’t annoy me. At all.
My commitment: To look for the good, even if I don’t always see it. To acknowledge the hard, too.
Updates on last week: I wanted information about my back tension/pain, and I got SO MUCH great stuff from so many different places. That ask reminded me how very many supports are often available to me if I just remember to ask. And THAT is something I really appreciate.
A happy week to everybody!
What I want: TIME. ENOUGH TIME. TIME! APPRECIATION TIME! (that is like my version of island time.)
Ways this could work:
-Distinguishing between the “something bad will happen if I don’t do this by x day” things and the “it’s really bad of me not to have gotten around to this for so long!”/”it would be great if I…” things
-Go to bed on time!
-Scheduling blocks of soul-filling time and “maybe if I feel like working I will look at the optional list” time.
-I could magically have more energy than I thought!
-Worrying less about getting things done will paradoxically help?
My commitment:
-To schedule the blocks tomorrow.
-To winnow the lists today. (Done!)
-To go to bed on time!
-To think about the qualities I am seeking.
I am so very grateful for this space. Love for everyone else’s gwishes!
Ahh! Excited squeeing for Shivanauticon! I won’t be able to make it, but will sooo be cheering you on. Awesome.
Also, sent you some stickers.
What I want: To get the house cleaned and company-ready for this coming weekend — and to have that cleaning be a joyful, playful, energetic experience.
How this can happen: Extreme self-care: plenty of rest, nutrition, and hydration. Ooh, I can try a proxy — maybe pretend that I’m in some kind of wacky athletic event. Plus, I can sing while I’m working; that tends to help.
My commitment: I invoke the superpower of Guilt Dissolving. All guilt that enters my sphere is transformed into glitter — because all is not g(u)ilt that glitters! Ha!
My VPAs for this week:
ONE
What I want:
make some *significant* progress on Section Gamma of my Secret Mission (also tentatively known as the Family Tree or the Family Relations — I’m still looking for a good proxy for this one). By significant progress I mean: read all of the leftover For Your Eyes Only Reports from Section Gamma, and get at least 3/4 of my Debriefing done, plus finish looking up all Possible Sources, or something to that extent. (This is a tall order.) BUT! I ALSO want this to happen in a happy, fun, sustainable, pleasurable manner.
Ways this could happen:
Well! I could challenge my pre-conceived notions of what Work is and how Work is supposed to happen.
I could try doing things Upside Down (or Widdershins, as Havi says). I could have an Upside Down day! A day with the beginning in place of the end, and vice-versa. And I could generally shake things up a bit.
I could use my proxy, and pretend that these really are For Your Eyes Only Reports. And that I’m writing a Debriefing to see if I got the facts right for my Secret Mission. [Note: I’m vague on what the word “debriefing” really means. I’ll look it up at some point, but right now I’m happy to just use it creatively.]
I could make sure I get plenty of rest. And naps (except they’re kind of hard to take in the office!). And breaks whenever I feel a break time is coming on. And have a snack whenever I begin to get hungry. (Except maybe bring some healthier snacks into the office as well, because too many industrial ones weigh me down after a while.) And keep some small, sweet, colorful things around, to remind myself about having fun with this.
My commitment:
to remember to talk to my monsters when they show up. It doesn’t need to be a long conversation; “I see you” and “Hey, would you like a donut? Or a safe room, or a hug, or anything else that helps?” is fine. Or, you know, whatever else works.
to look at all the stuff I’ve written above when I notice I’m heading back to my usual approach. But only after talking to the monsters.
TWO
I want to schedule an appointment to do something fun this week. Something just for me, with people I like (possibly just with me :D). And then KEEP IT.
Ways this could happen: I could schedule it at a specific time, write it on my calendar, and treat it as a real appointment that can’t be postponed, or cancelled. Like a doctor’s appointment. (Mental health is involved, after all.)
My commitment: Again, to talk with the monsters. And to be loving with myself about it. This isn’t about self-discipline: it’s about consciously doing something that gives me pleasure so that it can eventually become a habit.
THREE
To stop being sick. (Or rather, to recover completely, but it’s the same thing to me at the moment.)
Ways this could happen:
I could take really good care of myself, sleep/food/rest-wise. One specific element of this is not staying out late, not delaying meals, not delaying rest times by too much.
I could look for vitamins/supplements that might be useful and eat stuff that feels sensible.
My commitment:
to be patient about it, so I don’t overstep my boundaries too often. To be mindful about my physical and emotional state. To enjoy the fact that I’m not *more* sick (it was pretty bland, in fact. I’m just looking forward to feeling good again!).
Updates!
Last week I asked for a Partner in Crime (TM). Or, to say it better, a best friend. I didn’t find one yet, but I did notice more about who I am attuned to and who rubs my “energy field” the wrong way. And I did meet a “kindred spirit” at a party — only, he’s a guy (I was looking for a girl!) and we haven’t talked anymore since. Who knows. 🙂
Eeks, I missed the VPA! Well, not entirely, but OMG it’s Tuesday!
What I want:
Compassion and self care.
I want to give myself the loving attention I would give to a friend. I want to give myself the encouragement to take care of myself that I give to MrB. I want to do lots of the things that make me feel good physically and mentally and emotionally and spiritually.
I want to have the willingness to do the things that it takes to take care of myself.
Ways this could happen:
Shiva Nata! Well, the pink wig video and the 45 second demo and my notes about Shiva Nata. That helps when there is a process sort of thing that I need to figure out.
Lots of journaling.
Reward stickers! I keep forgetting about them but when I have a reward sticker program, it always encourages me.
Setting things up so I can easily do the self care things. Like putting my nutritional supplements in a pill sorter. Putting the stickers where I will be reminded to use them.
Enlisting support and reminders.
My commitment:
To set things up.
To take notes.
To use what I know.
What I want: I want a sumi bamboo brush!
How this could work: It just could. Serendipity. A trip to Dick Blick. I could find that one online store where we get a discount.
My commitment: I will enjoy the wanting of the brush and be open to inspiration.
What I want: magical healing! by Monday!
Ways this could work: My combination of Traumeel cream, tablets and drops, Epsom salts, baths, stretching, massage and far infrared could actually work even though I’ve had minimal results for the last month. Or it could work in another way I hadn’t heard of yet.
My commitment: to keep having conversations with the parts of my body that aren’t working, and to take care of them even after they get better
What I want: my move to Minneapolis to be really smooth!
Ways this could work: My crazy neighbor could stop acting crazy. Nothing wrong could happen. Easy smooth transition.
My commitment: to be open to possibilities of an easy move and let people help us.
What I want: abundance
Ways this could work: I could start landing more higher pay magazine work. Or my clients could start paying me more. Or I could find a real job part-time so that I could afford to turn down tedious low-paying work. Or I could find a pot of gold! I could also get $$ from past due invoices and sell books and things.
My commitment: to do the best I can with the work I do have which I’ve accepted, even if it is tedious and low paying and not exactly what I want
What I want: work awesomeness for my man
Ways this could work: his job could stop being poopyheads. or he could land another job. or he could find a pot of gold!
My commitment: to listen