Personal ads. They’re … personal! Very.
Each week I write these Visions of Possibility and Anticipation to practice asking for what I want. And to get clarity on what that really is, even when asking feels conflicted.
I always get useful information about my relationship with various aspects of the ask. Join in if you like!
This week I am being a mermaid who is also a dragon.
And — this is funny, but probably just to me! — I am working with the quality of simplicity.
In case you think that being a mermaid who is also a dragon is not especially simple, let me assure you that it is. For me. Today.
Thing 1: Wanted. Small toys and figurines of knights!
Here’s what I want:
I am practicing being a dragon because it helps me remember to give myself iron. And I eat knights because knights wear iron.
You’d think that this makes me the worst vegetarian in the world, but somehow it doesn’t.
I am a dragon and I eat knights and I consume their power of COURAGE and DEDICATION and FIERCENESS.
And I want little toys or figurines of knights to put on the window sill above the kitchen sink and remind me that it is time to ingest some more iron into my lovely and temporarily-depleted iron-craving body.
[IMPORTANT REQUEST. I want to make clear that I am *not* asking for more ways to get iron. This is has stuff attached for me. Thank you!]
Ways this might work:
Maybe I will find some. In a toy shop. Or through some other useful discovery.
Maybe some of you have something like this at home and you would like to send me a knight as a clew, that would be marvelous.
And then when I am done with my iron rituals, I will bring them to the Playground at Stompopolis where everyone can play with them.
If you happen to be a magical someone who has knights for me, I can be reached by way of the following address:
Havi Brooks
c/o The Fluent Self Inc
1526 NE Alberta St #218
Portland, OR 97211
United States
I’m playing with…
Feeling joyful and appreciative.
Roaring and making dragon sounds.
Remembering that even things I do not like can become playful.
Thing 2: The Two Day of Logistics.
Here’s what I want:
I have a bit of a messy week happening.
There are visitors. There are surprise visitors. There is a business rendezvous. There are pieces that need One More Next Step and pieces that need periods of undivided attention.
There is prep work and cleaning up, entry and exit.
Here is what I want: Let it be easy.
Or at least, let it be simple.
Ways this might work:
I could do shiva nata on it and then all of a sudden a plan could form itself.
I could map out a Plan A and a Plan B.
Another option: I could decide that I’m not going to worry about this and somehow it is all going to just work.
The monsters would like to point out that the last time we experimented with the above approach was an Unprecented Disaster. However, it is also possible that Now Is Not Like Then, so I will investigate that.
I’m playing with…
Figuring out which parts are the absolutely-absolutely most important and seeing what I can drop.
Asking how I want to feel, and making my decisions based on that.
No matter what comes up, my body comes first. That means sleep and yoga and dancing get priority over everything else.
Thing 3: Simplicity: the crayon approach.-
Here’s what I want:
Simplicity. Simplicity. More simplicity.
There are way too many things in my life that I am insisting on making way too hard.
I want to stop trying to figure out the What If This Happens Back-Up Contingency And Will This Work Ten Years From Now systems and ask how I would approach these things if all I had to work with were crayons and paper.
Ways this might work:
Solving for X. If X is simplicity, what are all the tools I already have to get closer to simplicity?
Looking for the holes. What are the steps that can be removed? What are the shortcuts?
Again, the thing that will help with this is shiva nata.
I’m playing with…
Mapping out patterns.
Thing 4: perfect simple solutions
Here’s what I want:
For so many things!
There is an unsovereign ask that needs attention, there is the new Entry system for Stompy Mice, there are the 28 Days of Entry for the new thing that is coming.
I need these things to resolve themselves, quickly and elegantly.
Ways this might work:
Interviewing Harmony (that’s slightly future me) to find out what she knows about this.
I suspect a lot.
Processing on the Floop.
I’m playing with…
Giving myself a lot of space. This has been an incredibly rough year for me, I have a lot going on, it makes sense that these situations would be hard to deal with.
There is time. It doesn’t feel like there is time, but I am going to trust that these things will begin to work themselves out.
And of course: fractal flowers. That always helps.
Progress report on past Very Personal Ads.
Just to update you on what’s happened since last time.
I wanted to welcome 5773, and that happened beautifully at the beach. So happy about that.
Then I wanted to play with the Anthology of What Havi Wants, and nothing yet. But I have been thinking about it a lot. So I’m going to let this percolate some more and check back in. Re-planted!
I asked about a possible new home for the Spunky Monkey, my favorite cafe. And I haven’t been there this week so I will have to check in on that.
Next I wanted to tell you about Richard’s amazing header special, and I don’t know about that either but I know that everyone who has done it absolutely LOVED the results. Obviously. He’s amazing.
There was an ask about moving triggers and other sources of friction, and I’m still working on that. Two are gone, and this is good.
And I wanted steps for Ms. Bell and I still want them. It looks like this one has some STUFF around it, so I am going to need to process some old pain before I can examine this again. That might be related to this week’s perfect simple solutions.
In fact, I suspect that this new superpower of Simplicity, once I get to know it better, will help with moving all of this forward.
Playful playing. Shelter for the comments.
What’s welcome: Your own wishes, gwishes, visions and personal ads, small or large. Updates on past ones if you like.
Here or on your own or in your head. It’s all fine. Or call silent retreat!
I’m receptive to warm wishes for the things I’m working on and playing with.
If you’re looking for suggestions or heart-sighs or anything else related to your wish, you will need to ask for that because our default mode is giving each other space and spaciousness for the process.
This is a place of safety for creative play and exploration, with a very non-dogmatic approach. We don’t tell each other how to ask for things and we don’t give unsolicited advice. We make space for people’s wishes.
That’s it. Let’s throw a bunch of things in the pot!
As always, amnesty applies. Leave a wish here any time you want.
xox
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I know this is entirely unrelated to anything, but every time there’s any mention of “STOMPopolis” I get this song from my childhood in my head. Sung by Chip & Dale, it’s highly addictive and hilarious: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BbabBrBhGfo
i just want to feel better. I am all stressed and ouch.
In other news, i am over my fear of riding on motorcycles and happily was a passenger at speeds of 70mph and up and down the mountain dirt road. yay!!
I hope you have many happy knights, havi!!!
The chipmunk song made my day! Thanks MaryTracy.
I want more being okay with how it is. Peacefulness, learning and no blaming (of myself) for the way it is, but also taking a look at what really is so.
Soooo, here what I’ gonna do:
I’m gonna practice writing the question”What is so?” and answering it until I find out what’s there. Really. I might have to also ask “Who says?” I’ll be waving to my critters or stopping to talk if needed.
I could also pause and lean in. Who knows? Could be cool.
Checking to see if my son’s play knights are still in the basement (he’s 27), if they are, Havi they’re yours.
Judy just posted Who are you listening to? http://wp.me/p277Bi-6A
@Katana Leigh: *high-fives*
Gwishes:
* My partner is moving his shop to a new building. I want that to go well, and for the new building to be leak-free and good for the business.
* Various friends and such are embarking on various transitions. Wishing them ease and safety.
Update: meh. This sunscreen thing is knotted up with bigger things about time and energy and baggage.
So, a thing for this week: I’d like to feel more at ease with the claims on my time and energy.
WTWC:
* circus-tamer?
* monster coloring book?
* unfollow/mute/ignore Twitter and mailing lists and fora?
* intentional hiatus?
* calendar jamboree?
I’ll start by playing with: talking to the Fear of Missing Out monster about tomorrow’s schedule. Because it is making a heck of a lot of noise about every variation of tomorrow there is, and all the doooooooooooooooom just makes me want to take a nap.
Wishing you all a wonderful week.
Visions! It has been much too long.
Today I think I’ll just throw some things in the pot:
1.) Purple house! Hearing back from the bank about the Purple house.
2.) Dancing and movement. Delicious full-body tired. More of it.
3.) Progress on the big stuck. At *least* some useful information on the astonishing lack of progress.
4.) Clothing! That fits!
Ringing the bell of ease and simplicity for these asks and any others that would like it.
Hello, VPA-ers! I would like help with an ask:
I’m looking for the perfect rainbow ear-cuff. Nothing fancy, just an ear-cuff that has bright rainbow stripes on it. If anyone knows of an online store that has pride body jewelry, I’d love a link to it! I haven’t been able to find anything on google so far. Thank you 🙂
Updates from last time:
– I wanted my spark back – and I’m getting there! Slowly. Just like with any rekindling, it’s not exactly the same. I’m getting used to newer ways of experiencing myself and my abilities. But it’s getting there.
– I wanted better work outs. This kinda fell through. I did get more rest, took the week away from working out, in fact, and have had more energy. Maybe this is part of it. Asking for strength and health this week.
– I wanted to start biggifying The Project. And I did! And it is lovely and wonderful and promising and I’m super excited about it.
– I also found some stuff to make my room feel personal! But there’s still a lot vacant of space on the walls.
This week I want:
1. To get up to speed with my pending stuff.
Ways this could work:
– Maybe my schedule could just magically fall into place.
– Maybe I could find pockets of expanding time (like now).
– Maybe I could start writing down the amount of time I spend on The Project, just to keep things in proportion.
I’ll play with:
– Ease! And Sovereignty. Which means *no one* gets my work out time. Except me and my working out.
– Lists! I love lists. I’ll make lists of stuff.
2. To figure out how to reach my right people. And for the meeting this week to go well.
Ways this could work:
– I don’t really know… maybe writing about it.
– Maybe I could read about things that I don’t know.
– Maybe I could imagine what it would be like to be one of my right people, and how it would be best to reach me.
– I could ask for help from the Coven of Guardians
– I could notify the Guardians Apprentices
I’ll play with:
– Wearing costumes. I am the Evil Mastermind! Also Resident Loon-Architect. But I feel like I need another costume. Something more helper-mouse-y and of-the-people-y. Something warm and gentle and strong and purposeful, but not violent or pushy or exclusive. I shall think on it.
– Becoming visible.
– Opening, slowly.
3. I want to start working on my getting my Magic Cloak of Honour, maybe just starting with thinking about it and looking at the spell-book. (this is a proxy)
Ways this could work:
– I could talk to the fear.
– I could ask for help from the Magistrate and helper-elves.
– I could wear a monocle and pretend to be a historian or an archivist and find the things I need that way.
– I could check the pantry for magic ingredients.
I’ll play with:
– Leaving the spell-book on my desk
– Sticking with this metaphor
– Using coloured pens and stuff to scribble in the spell-book.
Other things:
– I’m cat-sitting a diabetic cat for my landlady. I want the cat to stay well under my care.
– A copy of The Survivor’s Guide to Sex, for a bit cheaper than the stuff I see online.
– Still looking for a rug and sheer cloth.
Sending warmth to those who want it <3
Just saying hello – I seem to have gotten all the things I asked for last week, and as an added bonus, my daddy is safe and healthy (despite heart surgery… yay for him noticing things that felt not-right and going to the doctor.) So pretty much I don’t even know that there’s anything else I need/want right now. Other than maybe some hugs for it having been kind hard the last few days and to continue on my awesome streak of getting things in a way that feels awesome.
@ Sarah: {{ hugs }} for the hard.
I’d like to have an awesome streak of getting things in a way that feels awesome!
This week MrB is in good health and good spirits and I’d like that to continue.
The Boomerang Boy is unstable but there is some hope that arrangements can be made to keep him safe and to get him into a better living situation.
I’d like energy and ease as I do my “things”. For my teaching to go well. For shopping magic because I don’t like to shop and I have to get some things for my son. Ease in arranging time with the people that I want to spend time with.
The return of that lovely period of just floating along being happy. That was wonderful.
Wishing that for everyone.
“This week I am being a mermaid who is also a dragon.”
I heart you.
That is all.
Gwishing !
Organization and congruence and mini-rally. As further elaborated at floop.
And a happy humming in my whole body. That, too. The calm from which the happy emanates.
Into the pot:
–Financial security.
–A good new job for the Wizard, who got laid off yesterday.
–Joyful and abundant income streams in my own business.
–Continuous comforts of home.
–Love. Hope. Grace. Spaciousness. Ease.
Of course, a mermaid/dragon. They could compare notes on how to keep scales shiny! And that brings me to:
Want 1: Wanting to avoid comparing notes with people.
The main trigger is one person.
Lately, I feel judged, because I need assurance.
Scene 1: She asks for my advice. She doesn’t take my advice. I feel like the worst person ever.
Scene 2: She talks about how bad food X is. I have food X in my fridge. I feel like the worst person ever.
Scene 3: She wins the board game, or I win the board game. I feel resigned or shocked, respectively. I feel like the worst person ever.
I want the inner calm.
Method:
OOD (to help me picture how the happy ending will look, especially for the advice-fest which is the Bolivia trip).
Seeing how the connection is misfiring. Maybe by tai chi.
Looking at calm landscapes before I talk to her.
Finding a clew in my novel about self-hatred.
Want 2: Having a fun dinner with my VIP.
I just asked him for this (after pouting that he wasn’t here for lunch and getting very angry with myself that I *wanted something I wasn’t getting*. Argh. Asking is hard!)
I want the quality of sparkliness–pretty much the opposite of poutiness. Sparkly sprouts, spiderman!
How:
lots of force fielding!, long meandering bike ride, following a recipe, choosing to see my day as ok, asking for tiptoeing, keeping the humor.
I used to have a bunch of little toy knights. If I come across them, I’ll send them your way! 🙂
Shiny dragons! Metal knights! I love it. Happy knight-crunching to you, dragon-who-is-also-a-mermaid 🙂
Here are my gwishes. Into the pot!
+ For grumbly belly to settle down already. For magic awareness and experimentation to make very clear to me what is going on and how to work with it instead of against it.
+ Moon of witchyness! I want this moon, as it becomes full, to fill me up with witchiness in the best, most gleefully cackling, mischievous genius sort of way. Which is code but also literal, because that sounds really fun.
+ Time and attention and care for the household maintenance project that has been identified. For this container to hold unlikely solutions, simplicity, effortlessness.
+ Soup. Making it, eating it, being happily immersed in the culture of soup and soup-making, as proxy for entry to fall.
+ The phone project. To return to it, figure out what it needs, take the next steps. To reconnect to the old vision of it and figure out what the new vision of it might be.
Happy bubbling gwish-pot of gwishes! Yay.
Havi, we have some little knight figurines for you! They are very ugly and scrumptious looking. I’ll leave them in the Hold next time I’m at Stompopolis with a note.