Wow.
I was so caught up in my process and feelings and stuff like that around launching and announcing At The Kitchen Table With Havi and Selma (aka my Next Big Thing), that I honestly wasn’t prepared for the flood of questions, comments and critique.
I’m still answering a lot of it, but in the meantime ….
Here’s some email writing advice.
First … a peek into my inbox.
A bunch of people wrote in saying things like this:
“Ohmygod! This seems like the most amazing thing in the entire world and if I could afford it right now I would jump on it in a second.
I’m saving pennies and the second I can make it in, I will be there with you if you and Selma will have me! But it might take a really long time!”
Those people got taken care of right away.
One of my assistants set up a special option where they could pay with six automatic monthly payments. My other assistant wrote them a sweet note. All better. Not a problem.
Another bunch of people wrote in saying things like this:
“This program is too expensive.”
And this:
“Just wanted to send you a note on my reaction to the pricing for your new community project. I am usually the first person to jump on a well-constructed useful-looking bandwagon, and financially my family is doing okay — not great, but okay. I also understand that you’re pricing access at a little more than a dollar a day; many people pay 4 or 5 times that for a daily latte, so intellectually I understand it’s an affordable rate. But I wanted to tell you that my knee-jerk reaction is that the entry price is pretty high.”
The shortest answer?
If you think this program is too expensive, it’s probably not for you.
How about the medium-to-long-ish answer?
There are so many ways that I could answer this.
And I have to admit, there’s a huge part of me that’s tempted to link to a bunch of programs that cost seven or eight times as much, have way less content and are generally less impressive in every way.
That part of me really wants to talk about what it is that makes this program more valuable than anything I’ve ever done.
But that would be taking my energy away from the true answer.
Alright. The true answer.
This program is something I put together for my Right People. For the ones who come here every single morning. The ones who re-read old posts.
The ones who are applying — or trying to — everything I teach and can’t wait to take it deeper.
The ones who get it.
Judging by the fact that I got THIRTY applications to join my expensive, hard-to-get-into program in the first few hours after I announced it, it looks like my Right People got it.
That’s resonance.
Resonance? If you’re a regular reader or a doing-a-jig fan or took the Non-Icky Self-Promotion course, you’ve probably read my post on the art and science of pricing.
That’s where I talk about the awesomeness that is Pricing Resonance, something I learned about from Mark Silver.
What this means is that for every single product or service I put out into the world, I do a deep meditation where I sit with my heart and give attention to what it is that I’m giving.
And then the Right Price emerges from that meditation. It’s the price that my heart knows is right. And the people my offering is intended for feel the resonance and they know it’s right too.
I’ve done this exercise with many, many clients and students, and even people who aren’t remotely tree-hugging yoga teachers like me have experienced — in a visceral full-body-tingle way — how resonance works.
My point: If something I’m offering is not resonant for you, either I haven’t explained it well or — more likely — you’re not the person it’s intended for.
But shouldn’t I have done a better job of explaining it?
No.
In general, yes. In general, if you want lots of people to buy your stuff, your copy has to do a pretty fantastic job of explaining the benefits and meeting objections. But this isn’t a case of me wanting lots of people.
If I haven’t thoroughly explained this offer, it’s because I don’t want to … or need to.
Now let me explain that.
I don’t want to convince you that spending time with me and my duck would be the best thing to ever happen to you. That’s why I didn’t try to write copy for this thing.
If you aren’t already getting over-the-top turning-cartwheels excited by the possibility of what could happen in a warm, cozy, structured environment where I teach everything I know, I probably don’t want you at the Table.
Convincing you would be a mistake. It would bring in people who aren’t necessarily my Right People.
It’s always about your Right People.
You know about the Thousand True Fans concept, right?
Well, like many people who are doing this running-an-online-business thing in an intelligent, measured, intentional way, I’m most interested in hanging out with them.
I’ll still be here every day, writing, being a touchstone for those who need me … but my main focus is shining a light for my Right People.
Those thirty people who showed up in the first few hours? True fans.
The ones who are saving pennies to hang out with my duck because they know that what they will learn will help them destuckify old patterns and get them to the point that they feel safe and comfortable putting their work out into the world?
True fans.
I know who they are now. And I’m planning on loving them up and treating them right.
Here’s how you know if you’re one of my Right People.
You can skip this paragraph. You probably already know.
Here’s how you know if you’re not one of my Right People.
- You’ve read my Is This You? page and don’t identify with anything I’m talking about.
- You’ve read my About page and immediately wrote to tell me that I should talk more about Jesus on my blog or that I shouldn’t joke about Pastafarianism or that I mis-spelled my least favorite word in the entire world.
- You’re someone who jumps on bandwagons.
- When you read my posts you think “Hmm, interesting” instead of wanting to laugh, cry and dance a jig because you’re so relieved that someone else is out there, working on her personal, goofball figuring-out-her-stuff process and sharing it with you in a useful way.
- The stuff I do — and what it costs — just doesn’t feel resonant to you.
- You’re someone who says “it’s too expensive” instead of “I can’t afford it” or — what I would say — “I choose not to right now because I’m making other choices.”
And you know, in your heart, that this is not your right place.
Which is absolutely fine.
It’s okay, sweetie. You don’t have to be one of Right People.
Honestly. It’s not a bad thing that you’re not one of my Right People.
It doesn’t mean that I can’t like you or that you have to stop liking me. It just means that you’re someone else’s Right Person, not mine.
Selma and I are not going to be the right fit for most people, and we know that. And if it turns out that you and I are not the right fit for each other, that’s really okay.
What have we learned today about how to write email, kids?
You tell me.
I’ll leave you with this.
It’s from one of my Right People.
I’ve had so many allergic reactions to the usual marketing approach that,
aside from feeling the need to shower in an effort to remove the sliminess, I virtually swore off of it.It honestly wasn’t until I ran into you that I had any idea that marketing could be done in an honest, clear, heart-centered way and that it was even possible to enjoy success with no sleaze factor at all.
It was one of those light-shines-down-from-the-heavens-and-the-angels-sing moments for me. Seriously.
Now I’m looking at marketing with a spirit of inquiry. I feel like an intrepid adventurer that’s just landed on the alien albeit beautiful planet called Marketopolis.
I want to study every facet of this strange creature, get to know its inner workings and take home some mysterious jewels from its soils so that I can enjoy greater success in my own work.
If you could let me know how long the wait is to work with you, I’d dig you like an old soul record.
Long Live The Duck!
That’s the kind of person Selma and I will be hanging out with at the Kitchen Table, and you know what? I seriously could not be happier about it.
Oooooh! Selma flexes her ducky pecs!
Over the last year, I’ve been reading a great deal about this kind of thing. What comes out it is not just what you’ve said about Right People – which I think is completely accurate – but also about undervaluing what you do. In many examples given, people drastically undercharge for the service they provide, and those who value it will try to pay more, but they refuse. There’s also an issue that if you underprice something, something goes off in people’s heads that says “this is too cheap, there must be something wrong with it.”
It wouldn’t honestly matter if you charged $1000 for what you’re doing. You’ve cancelled your main income streams for this. If you said “This will cost you $1000 for the year” I would happily pay, and my rationale is very simple. I read all your posts and I comment on all your posts. If I’m stuck over something, I generally come here and I’ll find a post that works things out for me. I’m pretty much your Number One Scary Stalker Groupie Fan right now, I reckon. But that’s because I’m going through a lot of change, doing a lot of scary stuff, and what you do really clicks, really resonates with me. It’s not just you. I have a set of trusted go-to resources and honestly, it doesn’t matter what they charge, if I have the resources I’ll put the money down because I know I’m going to get the results I want.
A miracle happened this week and money appeared. So I’ve applied for the Kitchen Table (although I’m not sure I’ll get in). I could have gone for a cheaper option and bought a few other courses on which I’ve been hedging for a time. But you know what? I’m not so sure about them – which is why I’ve been hedging. So that’s why I’m happy to pay, which is basically just saying everything you just said in your entry but in not quite such a classy way. And possibly making myself sound like a Scary Stalker Person into the bargain. Well so be it.
Joely Blacks last blog post..This is a post all about change
Ha, it’s so funny, my absolute honest-to-god first reaction when I read about the program was “this is way too cheap!” (in the first month alone there are sessions scheduled that would easily be worth the entire cost if advertised separately, not to mention the forums etc.) I was going to comment to that effect but then I figured, um, you probably know what you’re doing 😉 Anyway, it just goes to show there will always be vastly different reactions to pricing.
Eileens last blog post..Just don’t do it.
Joely – I challenge you to a duel! Or at least, I want to be Number Two Scary Stalker Groupie Fan 🙂
I’m with Joely on every part of this – I inhale everything you write. I’m on reading deprivation week of the Artist’s Way, and here I am, reading. (Julia Cameron, please don’t hurt me.)
So if I’m here every day, first thing, then paying money for a place where I can hang out with you and other cool, wonderful people like Joely, then I am all over that. And I probably would have begged, borrowed, and stolen cars, and maybe sold my sister into slavery to pay for this. Even if it had been $2000, and not $400 (which is ridiculously reasonably, if you ask me.)
I agree with the above emailer:
Long Live The Duck!
Sarah Marie Lacys last blog post..What I wish they taught in schools.
Hee. As I was reading some of those snippets, my thought was pretty close to what your short answer was: Dude, people, this probably is not for you! (Yes, I live in California – I don’t know what the “dude” thing is about, but sometimes I really do say that in my head. I know, I know. For shame!)
I can’t WAIT to join you (and Selma, of course) at your kitchen table…and even though I’m in the same financial boat as MANY MANY others and it’s not like I have money sitting around and waiting to be spent, I just know that this is right for me at this moment in time. I’m so grateful that I found the Havisphere…
@ Joely and @ Sarah Marie: I’m glad it’s not only me who feels like Scary Stalker Groupie Fan! Or maybe it’s even scarier how many of us there are…ahem. I know I have a problem. The first step is admitting it. 😛
Eileens last blog post..Just don’t do it.
If only, if only I had a *reason* to hang out at your kitchen table, I would have been within one of those 30. But I don’t, because I’m following about 20 different dreams at once right now, and my work dream is where I am already.
I wish I had come across your blog (had it existed) about 2 years ago; when I had my practice up and running, clients coming in left, right and centre and I hit a big fat wall because I wasn’t running my business true to me. I was scared to, because that went against all the stuff that was out there that said – you’ll be successful if… blah, blah, blah.
But… I’m a big believer in right timing, and I suspect that it wasn’t right timing for me then and it was right timing when I found you one lovely day, when I was feeling like rubbish a few months ago.
What coming here and reading and re reading your posts and comments has done, has handed me a huge plate of self acceptance over the past few months and has helped me to begin to make choices and set intentions that are now true to me. I’m gonna have to challenge Joley for the Number One Scary Stalker Groupie Fan though.
Ummmm, so what was my point? Well, I’d be applying like mad to join your kitchen table if that was actually what was right for me right now. However, since my grant just came in, I think I’m off to get Shiva Nata instead and epiphany it on up. *Gulp*
Wormys last blog post..Clamming up even from my Blogedy blog blog blog.
Hey, I can imagine that was such a shock to get the flood of emails you did. Especially when you’re putting your heart into At the Kitchen Table. Wow.
Thanks for taking a minute (a lot of minutes) to share the process. I’ve been spending a lot of my time lately working on talking to my Right People. Identifying my Right People. (Rather than saying what I think I SHOULD be saying. And one of the hard parts I’ve discovered is that it includes saying no to a whole lot of the Not Right People. So seeing how you do that in your Havi way is incredibly helpful.
I’m so, so, so excited to be a part of At the Kitchen Table, and to be there with people who are just as excited as I am.
Thanks.
Shannon Wilkinsons last blog post..Coming Soon to a website near you! The one you’re looking at in fact…
I’d totally be there if I had the money right now, because a group of people lovingly encouraging me to let people see my stuff would be very, very good for me. But, you know, money, gah. One day (I’ll either have more more or I’ll say screw it, it could be the best investment I ever make).
Kates last blog post..Alternative forms of meditation
Eileen, I thought the same thing. I pay more each month for my contact management software, and that won’t change my life. I can see how this forum might, though.
@Eileen @Wormy @Sarah Am I relieved I’m not the only one or convinced I must’ve emailed her at least a zillion times more than everybody else. And I never thought I’d get into a challenge fight for being Number One Stalker Groupie!
Joely Blacks last blog post..This is a post all about change
Well, I’ll just join the throng of fans here, Havi – and say that this was one of my favorite articles ever!! Especially the last part when again you said . . . . don’t worry guys, if this isnt right for you, I’ll still be your friend!!
Fortunately for me, the kitchen table is a perfect setting for what I’m looking for – that huge dose of self acceptance that makes it all possible for me to love whatever is happening in my life.
And the concept that – sometimes, you’re just not in the mood – and that’s okay.
Those words are like the greatest massage oil on my sometimes parched self esteem – and as I continue to indulge everyday in my favorite blog – my self esteem sky rockets with peace and gentleness.
Thank you Havi for offering me the opportunity of a lifetime – I’d much rather be at the kitchen table than going on a luxurious retreat.
I’m looking forward to hanging out with your – and my – right people.
xoxox
Can we all just run for a big, huge TIE on being the Number One Scary Stalker Groupie Fan?
If we all liked the same stuff, things would be pretty unbearably boring. Or rephrased, “It takes all kinds!” as the old lady said when she kissed the cow.
I’m *not* signing up for the Kitchen Table – although I was way-seriously tempted – because I know one of my patterns is Thinking I Need to Know MOREMOREMORE. So what I’m working on now is (1) not knowing *anything*; (2) trusting that I *do* know *enough*; and (3) stopping the whole Learn More/Write About It loop and getting into a Being/Doing space.
(But I’m envious of all of you who will be sitting ’round that table.)
And in the meantime, I’ll keep hanging out here and reading everything I can – and being one of the Scary Stalker Groupie Fans.
@Joely I am too relieved…LOL
I am soooo looking forward to it.
PS: I could bring real Racine, WI Danish kringle to the table. 🙂
Amy Mommaertss last blog post..Asking… the Simplest Things Can Be Difficult
Hilarious! Really.
You guys have no idea how many people start their emails to me with something along the lines of “I know I’m your number one freaky stalker and you probably think I’m crazy but …”
So yeah, it’s a big club. And I’m that person for lots of other people, so it all works out in the end!
@Kate – You’ll come when the time is right. And we’ll be recording and documenting most of the sessions so you’ll be able to catch up on stuff you missed that you think is relevant for you.
Actually … we’re spending the whole first quarter focusing on the theme of money and our relationship to it. Lots of good material. And it will all be there for you when you need it. So no worries, my love.
@Grace – I adore you just the same! And just so you know, this space isn’t about learning so much as having people to help you process.
It’s groups and partnering and accountability and checking in with people and asking for input and reactions to what we’re working on.
It’s basically about not being alone in the self-work process.
I talk about teaching because there are a lot of concepts that my clients have that I want everyone to have access to. But it doesn’t have to be about absorbing information. It’s really about having a cheerleading squad and a sanctuary and a place to feel safe, supported and loved.
We’ll be doing lots of things like working on habits and checking in and making sure we spend time with our body, and stuff like that.
Anyway, glad to have you all here, keeping me company. *blows kiss*
One more thing!
I just got an email expressing fear that the Kitchen Table people will be like, this cool private club and everyone else will feel bad.
So I just wanted to reassure …
I often get email from people who talk about feeling lonely or frustrated because it seems (to them) that the comments here are from people who are all friends and all know each other.
Which is absolutely not the case.
Nor is it the case that my clients are a special private club as opposed to my non-clients.
When I was first planning the Kitchen Table, I wanted to have a “just forum environment” option that would be much less expensive. However, when I talked it over with people, they expressed fear that this would create a “special private club” thing for the people doing the full program.
So it seems like this is a pretty common fear.
I get that this feels frightening and worrisome because you really want to know that you’re going to feel like you belong and that you’re being taken care of.
And I don’t really know how to address it other than to say that this has never happened before.
There isn’t a private club here of my clients and there isn’t a private club here of the people who took my course with Naomi, and there won’t be a private club of Kitchen Table mice.
All I can do is tell you that it doesn’t work that way here. And it’s not going to.
I just want to say that when I read “destuckification” I see “duckification” Which I’m pretty sure means about the same thing.
I heart the stuffin’ out of all you said. I heart your freaky leg-wrestling uber fans too.
Actually it is this community right here between the posts, the pearls of wisdom and loving people who have weaved themselves into something stronger and better than the individual that keeps me coming back more, more, more.
I mean, Havi, you’re swell and all, but it’s the all of it that makes this marvelous.
I’d be a mouse at the table too, but it’s not my right time. I expect one day it will be.
Juliannas last blog post..Love Thy Self
Maybe it’s something that we all have – that fear that there’s some club we don’t belong to, and to get approval we have to belong to it. I think however you did this, there would be people who for whatever reason felt they didn’t quite belong. Because maybe we’re here because there are places we feel we don’t belong.
Does that make any sense or am I being insane again?
Joely Blacks last blog post..The things I think that I know are stupid but I think them anyway
Yes. Nail on the head.
Thanks, Joely. That completely makes sense.
And it’s easy for me to go off into my own stuff of “Ugh, no one wants me to have a successful business or make any money ever”, so I also need that reminder that this part is my stuff and the “fear of feeling like an outsider” is their stuff.
Havi, thanks for this post, which is hard-hitting. My first reaction was, “ouch.”
“Snap, she means business!”
Like your emailer, I also worried this new endeavor would be a little private club, and there would be inside references on your blog, like “the other day at the kitchen table, so-and-so said this brilliant thing, and too bad the rest of you weren’t there to witness it.” Of course, that wouldn’t ever happen, but what I’m worrying (yes, I’m a worry-wart) is that your kitchen table will take you away from the rest of us here on your blog. I know you can’t necessarily know how it’ll all work out; what I do know is that you have the best of intentions, and you helped me through a super tough spot not too long ago, and that means everything to me.
I have a million questions about your table (but I get why you left it open-ended) and so I’m glad you hinted at a few things in this post. Like that there *might* be a payment plan, which puts my mind at ease. And that there might be partnering up and being held accountable and lots of individual support.
Dawns last blog post..PC Load letter. What the fuck does that mean?*
Ohmygosh – interesting that this whole “private club” things was totally the stuff I was dealing with in regard to trying out Twitter! It was (is? yes, probably “is”) my own stuff about feeling like I was the odd (wait for it…) duck, standing outside and looking through the glass, watching all the “popular” kids hanging out together at some virtual Peach Pit or something (oh goodness, I just dated myself, and, well, probably did other not-great-things to my non-reputation with that reference)!
But now, slowly, I’ve been trying to open the door and step inside, little by little, and seeing how it feels. So far it’s been ok, really – and Havi’s been so kind and supportive – which is why I feel like I can offer this to anyone who thinks that Havi’s kitchen table might end up some scary private club: my experience here, with Havi and her right people, has been the exact opposite of what I was fearing. And believe me, I’m REALLY new – I crazily signed up for Havi’s blogging therapy class without ever having commented or exchanged more than one email with Havi, and this is like my, what, 3rd comment total here? Yet, when I bring my own “private club” fears to this place, I’ve always been pleasantly surprised by how NON-exclusive things have turned out to be. So I hope more of you just bring along your own fears of being an outsider and join me – and we can all love and pet and generally-be-kind-to those fears together.
Hi Darling,
I am definitely one of your many fans, although the only person that I stalk on a regular basis is my totally cute husband! But I am very happy to be part of the open hearted community here at Havi & Selma’s place.
I so love the whole resonance practice around pricing because what is important is that the pricing works for you! That being said, I am in the camp that thinks that what you are asking for this program is incredibly reasonable. I think that the people who say “It’s too expensive” are drawn to what you are offering ( I see this all the time with my own workshops) and want it and don’t want it or are scared of it at the same time. But instead of being able to say that truth, it comes out as if you are doing something wrong! Ah, the jumbled up wackiness of the human mind.
Because there is already such a strong sense of community developed here at your blog,people’s feelings about inclusion/exclusion are also coming up. But anyone who has spent any time here knows that the door is wide open to anybody who wants to heal and grow. I have never felt anything but welcomed and i don’t think you have to be concerned that it is somehow your fault that people are having these fears. it’s good that you address it, but again, it’s just their “stuff'”.
Can’t wait for the Kitchen Table to get started. And hey, what kind of snacks are we going to be having? Are latkes out of season now? Or is it going to be cheese, cheese, cheese?
Love you bunches,
Chris
chris zydels last blog post..The ART OF INNER CLUTTER CLEARING: MAKING ROOM FOR WHO YOU REALLY ARE
you know what it IS A CLUB ! It such a club I can’t even find the place where it explains how much it costs ! or am I just dim?
creativevoyages last blog post..edible inspiration
P.S. I TOTALLY want you to make money and be wildly successful! Cause I love you madly but also because if you are more successful it just helps us all the more in our quest for biggification!
chris zydels last blog post..The ART OF INNER CLUTTER CLEARING: MAKING ROOM FOR WHO YOU REALLY ARE
I really like your duck…but I’m not sure about you…I am intrigued and yet I know that for now the “right” thing for me is to just read and watch for awhile. Strange, I am really drawn to the whole duck concept (Gosh, I hope that does not make me a quake–no offense Selma–I know that was not especially clever),I love the pricing concept–its nice to feel validated, since this is how, I so often price.
What is bothering is me is the word “Right.” Think I will sit with it for awhile…my gut tells me you have value to offer and that I did not find your blog by mistake.
Thank you.
Katybeths last blog post..katybeth 2009 Musings
Okay, Right Pricing …
@Katybeth – I also didn’t like the word Right when I first encountered it with Mark. To be honest, I didn’t even like the exercise at first.
I think the trick is letting the “Right” be temporary. It’s right for you in that moment for these specific people for this specific thing. Maybe a month later it stops being Right and you need to do the exercise again and get a new Right number, you know?
You’re right – it’s an uncomfortable concept. And you’re right not to be sure about liking me. This was a mean, hard post and I’m processing a lot of stuff right now.
Selma, though, is always a sweetheart.
I should also add, hi!
I’m so glad Eileen already said that she thought it was way too cheap because when I started reading this post, I thought “What are those people thinking. It’s ONLY $400.” I was trying to work out what planet they lived on that all that stuff was going to be worth less than that. So there. I’m up there with the would have paid more crowd. But your response was so much more together and sensible and loving and all that stuff we come here for.
JoVEs last blog post..a well chosen metaphor
Havi – I LOVE how you’ve just given us a window into your process.
And seeing your honesty about this topic is so helpful for me, since my Stuff involves not being able to be open and honest when other people’s Stuff is bumping up against mine.
I feel like I just learned something huge that I can start to apply (gently) in my own life.
And to the readers who worry that this is a closed space for Havi’s “in crowd”? I speak from experience when I say that from the first time I commented, everybody here was so welcoming! I didn’t know any of them until I jumped in.
So come on in, the water is fine!
Victoria Brouhards last blog post..Chasing the Pain and Assorted Messiness
I’m crying.
We did the price resonance thing after reading about it from you and Naomi, and so far we’re only getting the “Your price is too high” people, including a few people we thought were big supporters – one of them said he’d never tell anyone about us anymore because no one he ever knew or would ever talk to would be able to afford us. It’s so scary sometimes!
I have a lot in me that needs to be said but it’s all doing a bottleneck somewhere between my brain and fingers.
Kyelis last blog post..Happy Birthday, Dru!
I second Victoria on the fact that some of us just commented and someone became part of this thing. No one invited me. I just said hello, and here I am in it.
JoVEs last blog post..a well chosen metaphor
Ohhhhhhhh
@Kyeli – Oh sweetie, I’m sorry! That’s no fun. It’s really hard to hear things like that. You must feel so frustrated and hurt when you think about getting that kind of reaction because you need to know that your Intention of helping people is being received.
Hug to you, my sweet.
There are all sorts of things that can happen with resonant price to kind of get it stuck.
One is when there’s some internal conflict or cognitive dissonance because a big fear is feeling unacknowledged and there’s resistance.
Another is that it has to be resonant for your Who – your right people again. Which means that maybe what felt resonant for you is something that’s intended for people who already get the value, might be a slightly different market.
And another (BIG) thing is copywriting and presentation — where people don’t actually understand what they’re really getting in terms of how it will truly help them, in which case they can get distracted and miss out on the vibration.
So there are a lot of things both literally and energetically that can occasionally go a bit wonky. This exercise takes some practice.
So gentle with yourself, and give yourself the love and safety you need.
And you’ll see. You’ll work on different aspects of this. Maybe the right price you got was a future right price, or maybe, again, it’s about the frame and the presentation.
In the meantime, suround yourself with people who get you and appreciate you.
And remind the people you know that while it’s one thing to say “I can’t swing it right now”, it’s completely in bad form to say “That’s too expensive.”
It’s like going up to someone and saying “That shirt looks awful on you.” Even if that’s what you think, it’s a tacky thing to say and it’s not relevant because if they love the shirt and their girlfriend loves the shirt and so on, who cares what someone else thinks?
But that’s a business etiquette rant-let for another day.
In the meantime, big hug. And Pace is at the Kitchen Table where we’ll be working on Money Patterns for the next three months so I’m sure she’ll share with you lots of stuff that she picks up.
@Everyone else – send Kyeli an internet hug!
For me, this post puts Havi’s message of accepting where we are at the moment into a tangible, day-to-day situation. I love the way you, Havi, can take a “No” (so to speak) and transform it into something kind, loving and accepting of where we/others might be in our/their lives… Transforming it into something “good.” I’d call it a “gift” but I’m guessing it’s something you’ve worked very hard at learning.
When I was on pins and needles about whether I’d get into the Kitchen, I wondered what the letters to people who didn’t get in would look like. I was telling myself it would be OK if I didn’t make it in because, perhaps, it wasn’t the right time for me and I was also sure Havi would have a gorgeous and lovingly articulate way of letting me know I was OK anyway and perhaps just needed to be somewhere else.
The only time it feels a teeny bit like a special group to me is when I read all the sharp, funny, smart writing that goes into the Comments here. My brain just doesn’t seem up to that lately and, of course, that’s *my* thing.
I’m excited about the Kitchen! I have less of a business orientation at the moment but I plan on learning a LOT about all kinds of stuck (which I DO have). Thanks, Havi, for all you do.
For me, this post puts Havi’s message of accepting where we are at the moment into a tangible, day-to-day situation. I love the way you, Havi, can take a “No” (so to speak) and transform it into something kind, loving and accepting of where we/others might be in our/their lives… Transforming it into something “good.” I’d call it a “gift” but I’m guessing it’s something you’ve worked very hard at learning.
When I was on pins and needles about whether I’d get into the Kitchen, I wondered what the letters to people who didn’t get in would look like. I was telling myself it would be OK if I didn’t make it in because, perhaps, it wasn’t the right time for me and I was also sure Havi would have a gorgeous and lovingly articulate way of letting me know I was OK anyway and perhaps just needed to be somewhere else.
The only time it feels a teeny bit like a special group to me is when I read all the sharp, funny, smart writing that goes into the Comments here. My brain just doesn’t seem up to that lately and, of course, that’s *my* thing.
I’m excited about the Kitchen! I have less of a business orientation at the moment but I plan on learning a LOT about all kinds of stuck (which I DO have) and seeing what happens once I get going. Who knows?! Thanks, Havi, for all you do.
*Sending Kyeli a hug!*
As my partner in life and business says:
Expensive – compared to what?
To the expensive car one drives arguing about my fee?
To the christmas presents made for wife and children?
To the gazillions of dinner´s or fancy shoes one buys?
I don´t make my services cheaper because a client is not willing to turn something down – the question is: how important is it?
Kind Regards from (c)old Germany
Andrea
Posts like this are why your writing is firmly stuck in my reader. Not to be crass, but you have this kinda staggering way of taking crap and turning it into cupcakes. Delicious cupcakes that are wholesome and nutritious, of course.
I’m confused, though — is the kitchen table full? I can’t apply right now, but it’s an option I would love to explore in the (near?) future…
Thanks :).
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You guys!
Thanks for all the warmth and love. APPRECIATED.
@Zoe – sorry that I missed this! Answered it today (Sunday) in my FAQ post.
And I will treasure your “crap into delicious cupcakes” line forever. That rocks.
@Andrea – You are absolutely right. Thanks!
Havi,
I’ve been reading your posts for a few weeks, now and am enjoying so much learning all about your process, something I pay close attention to. And everyone else’s, too and then of course, I learn so much more about me. So, thanks for your time and sharing.
My husband and I make pottery and sell it so I deal with people alllllll the time asking why this mug or bowl is worth the price I put on it. Most of the time they are curious, one man told me he would buy it for his wife, but he didn’t get why I was asking $200 for it.
And so I told him. And I have to say that much of my time in the gallery is spent in education. There are days when I would rather pot than talk (could be most) or write and never talk to anyone. But my real job is to teach people why hand made pottery is superior. Not everyone gets it and many people are rude and snotty. And it hurts. And I go to John and complain, which makes me feel worse, or I make fun of them, which makes me feel better, and then worse. So, taking that high road, I just teach.
You do too. And well, I am learning.
Keep it up. I look forward to learning more.
Diane McNeils last blog post..A Winter Break? Maybe from pottery.