Personal ads. They’re … personal! Very.
Each week I write these Visions of Possibility and Anticipation to practice asking for what I want. And to get clarity on what that really is, even when asking feels conflicted.
I always get useful information about my relationship with various aspects of the ask. Join in if you like!
Thing 1: Talk to Bond Girl.
Here’s what I want:
Bond girl is my alter-ego and also my new proxy for everything. How would I do thing if I were a Bond girl?
Talking to Bond girl solved all the challenges with reintegrating into daily life after my two weeks of Extra-Silent Radio Silence Silent Retreat at the Vicarage.
And being Bond girl also delivered some exceptionally marvelous (and hilarious) epiphanies last week at Rally (Rally!).
I want to talk to her. Specifically: about how all the missions appear to be equally vital and time-sensitive!
Because right now it seems like there are at least a dozen Important Things that all need my attention and need it now.
(According to the latest and consistently-consistent monster-count, there are seventeen billion Important Things.)
What do I do, Bond Girl?
The qualities inside of the want:
Curiosity. Receptivity. Connection. Internal support. Trust. Faith. Play.
And the superpower of Willingness to Be Surprised.
Ways this might work:
Well, Bond Girl will know if I talk to her.
She will know how this is okay, and how it is all actually right timing even (especially!) when it doesn’t look like right timing.
She will know about fractal flowers and surprising ways it can work. And what can be dropped. She’ll know where to start and how not to get overwhelmed. She will remind me about how to stay in a state of joyful, loving focus.
So really it’s just a matter of getting the time gremlins onboard with taking the time to talk to her. As a form of conscious entry.
I can ask my Internal Scientists to pull out the very compelling data they’ve collected about how the quality of my work improves the more I turn inward first.
I’m playing with…
Patience. Being curious. Asking questions. Dressing like Bond girl, because: costume.
Remembering and calling on the secret Vicarage-superpower of quietly trusting (with a smile and a shrug) that All Timing Is Right Timing.
Thing 2: Operation Watch This, Baby.
Here’s what I want:
There is a situation that currently appears to be a challenge. A big one.
Note: This is not at all the same thing as Watch This Baby. Commas are important!
Except it isn’t really a big challenge because Bond girl is very clear that this is actually not only Not A Disaster but really the best thing ever. Apparently I will be thrilled a few months from now about how this fell apart, so I might as well get on board now.
In the meantime, I need a perfect simple solution please so that neither I nor the First Mate get depleted and exhausted.
The qualities inside of the want:
Spaciousness. Calm. Support. Community. Play. Welcoming.
And all the superpowers of fairy godmothers and frequent flyers.
Ways this might work:
Maybe there is a way that the Frequent Sail-er/Sailor Rewards & Treasures voyage could be activated here too. Interesting…
I can bring this up with the Knights of the Blue Table. I can bring it to the Red Rose Missive and Wednesday’s secret agent session with Our Man In Marin.
And of course, I can keep talking to Bond Girl.
I’m playing with…
Right now, in this moment of silent-retreat-induced peacefulness, I really and truly believe that a solution is going to reveal itself.
So I want to hold on to that feeling.
And if it disappears and I forget, I will go to the conducting vault and conduct some more peacefulness.
And if I forget about that, then I will cry and take a bath or have a nap, and it will be okay.
Thing 3: Operation Dock Deck Five.
Here’s what I want:
I’m going to take a silent retreat on this one.
The qualities inside of the want:
Readiness. Willingness. Sailing. Integrity. Celebration. Joyful delight. Embarking. Humming. Glowing. Radiance. Resonance. Steadiness. Calm. Anticipation. Warmth. Waving from shore.
The superpower of Wait This Could Be Fun If I Let It.
Ways this might work:
You know how on a ship it’s all maintenance all the time? Something is always being fixed, painted, refinished.
Well, someone sat down and came up with a schedule for that.
Also I think we could use some Heinzelmaenchen.
I’m playing with…
Trust, trust and more trust.
Planting the wish that this will be both easier and more fun than I’m imagining.
Can this happen on Toozday? I hope so. Let’s find out!
Thing 4: Sparking the sparks! Vocal excitement about Stompopolis!
Here’s what I want:
Now that Stompopolis has reached her sailing speed and is operating, fully functional, stopping in ports, opened to new mice…
I want people to play with!
And I want joyful excited whispering and note-passing about ohmygod Stompopolis and how this is the most spectacularly magical and extraordinary place in the world. Because it is.
The qualities inside of the want:
Celebration. Discovery. Channels. Joyfulness. Receptivity. Playfulness. Peacefulness. Dance. Doors. Opening. Flowering. Anticipation. Emergence. Expectancy. Sparks. Twinkling.
And the superpowers of being a speakeasy and All The Right People Find Us In All The Right Ways.
Ways this might work:
I would love it if you guys would follow and play with Stompopolis on Facebook and Stompy Twitter and adore our pictures on Instagram (Stompstagram!).
I want PDX-ers and people who live around Portland (the Younger) to get pop-in passes and play, and for far-away Friends of Playground to arrange secret visits.
I want excitement and hopefulness and secret happy whispers.
What else? I could talk to Hope and Dana. I could bring this to the Knights Of The Blue Table. I can play with this at the Floop when the Floop sets sail. Yay Floop!
I’m playing with…
Holding this spark in my hand. Smiling at it because it is so beautiful and now is the time.
Noticings about the things I want this week…
Receptivity is big. Playfulness, unsurprisingly.
And it’s all about releasing attachment to the way I think things should be happening, and let the way that they are happening be okay. Or: change course if I want to. But I’m changing course because I know that everything is good, not because I’m scared or distracted.
Bonus wishes, please!
Some of these are secret agent code and some of them are things I’m silent retreat-ing on. Some are qualities that will help. And some are almost pre-wishes: tiny seeds for future processing.
- Mission: Belated Mishloach Manot.
- Mission: the Red Rose Missive.
- Clews about a certain bathrobe.
- Hush Hush Hat.
- 16 sets of Sunday clews. V is a clew!
- Winning At Pants (is it…just one guy? Hahaha. Chicken joke.)
- Renaming parts of chickens for extra-congruence.
- Operation 6 Week Wonder.
- 36 things you may or may not know…
- A bag with someone else’s name on it.
- Clew mat for Rally…interesting.
- Joyful re-entry!
- Update the about page.
- Hermes of the winged feet.
- Loving-focus and good surprises.
- The Grand Vicarage Chicken Revue. And also reporting back on VPAs.
- Another verb for standing watch? Let’s ask the Officer of the Watch.
- This is right. This is right. This is right.
I’m playing with…
Trust, trust and more trust.
Progress report on past Very Personal Ads.
Just to update you on what’s happened since last time.
I wanted a hot date with Incoming Me, and boy did Rally ever provide that. It was smoking hot. Then I wanted ease-filled transitions, totally happened.
Also I wanted Rally #24 to be amazing. Hahahahahaha. Rally is always amazing. This one was somehow especially so.
And I wanted the superpower of Joyful Presence. Got it. This was a remarkably good week for wishes, apparently. Or maybe I’m just getting better at figuring out what I want. That is also a possibility.
Playing. Shelter for the comments.
What’s welcome: Your own wishes, gwishes, visions and personal ads, small or large. Updates on past ones if you like. Things sparked for your own process.
I’m receptive to warm wishes for the things I’m working on and playing with.
We ask for what we need, and we give each other space and spaciousness for the process.
This is a place of safety for creative play and exploration, with a very non-dogmatic approach. We don’t tell each other how to ask for things and we don’t give unsolicited advice. We play.
That’s it. Let’s throw a bunch of things in the pot!
As always, amnesty applies. Leave a wish here any time you want.
xox
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Hi, week. Hello, things.
Into the pot —
* solutions to drying and storing clothing that
** fit my budget, space, and (im)patience with contraptual complexity
** are not manufactured in China
** are attractive
* frames: ditto, ditto, ditto
* mental scalpels for this week’s Big 3
* the wisdom to apply them only where warranted
* recovering the momentum I had before shabbat
Qualities inside these wants: competency. standards. minding my business.
Noticing: only part of me is impatient, even though it’s so very noisy and arm-in-arm-with-monsters about it.
I’m playing with: ignoring the rabbits. Resuming the race-that-isn’t-a-race at my own pace.
Warm wishes (and pinwheels and buttercups and other spinny, springy goodness) to those of you who wants ’em.
Oh hello, new week. I hope you’re ready for me!
I don’t know if I should admit that I initially read that title as “Comma as you are, commas” (puntastic!) or if I should admit that I now have Nirvana stuck in my head singing that line on repeat.
An update on last week’s gwishes:
I left a wish for some Stone Skipping cards, and the set from Mechaieh arrived yesterday! And have been used! And it was just the right thing at the right time!
I also left a wish for finding ways to give my body the support and care it needs, and this really didn’t change, so back into the pot it goes.
Also into the pot…
Right in the middle of some very large transitions, places where I am finding new ways to be. Ow Ow Ow, difficult stuff. Leaving a little note/gwish for myself to spend some time with the Anthology of Pearls, because to get where I’m going (evidently it’s a journey! Down the yellow brick road!) I need to get to know my road trip companions better.
And a wish upon a star for “just right”ness this next week – everything not too much, not too little, but just right.
Update on Last Week:
At-home Rallying in spirit with the Rallions at Rally in Portal-Land?happened.
At the end of the week, I was able to spend some time playing with actual toys, while pretending to work.
Other things didn’t happen. Re-asking some of them for this week: in Project Sweet Grasshoppers and Operation Eject.
My ask for connection from last week looks likely to happen this week, as there is a Cuba potluck, and a couple of other things either already set up or that are easily set up. I could call TL and SH for coffee dates, in case either of them is healthy enough for social activity.
For this week:
UFYH
Operation Eject – because Project Eject has grown larger and more complex and it feels like a status change is warranted.
Project Fulfillment: an experiment to investigate whether I “ever” get what I want.
Project Duarte
Project Saucy Groups (about my Stomping Ground). I folded last week’s Cabo Bojador into Project Sanitized Groundhogs.
TOT, this time with MrB’s involvement
And I may need to be involved in his Operation IRS Response.
I ask for health and energy to do all the things. This ask means I am committing to getting sleep when I can, eating healthy foods, taking supplements. I’ll play with making this playful.
Qualities of the VPAs: fun, fulfillment, exploration, experimentation, lightness, belonging, love.
This week I want the Superpower of Having Exactly What I Need.
I love you, Havi! Warmest gwishes for your gwishes! The bit about Stompopolis resonated with me because I am also gwishing for spark-sparking and excited whispers about Monster Talk, and this is such a more positive, scarcity-free, playful and compassionate way of putting it than ‘I need more clients’! Thank you for sparking a spark in me with your talk of spark-sparking! All the sparklepoints! <3 <3
Hey there VPAs. It’s been too long. Can I get you a cup of tea? Get comfy – this week’s asks have a theme of specificity.
ASk #1
A place to live in my price range where my cats will feel welcome. A place where I can walk to things that are interesting. Near the water. Where there are activities and things I want to do, people I want to see. In an old-ish building with character and delightful architectural features. Perhaps a 2nd bedroom or a nook for doing art projects. A nest-y place I can settle into and stay for a long time. It has a lot of light and I can’t see the dumpster from my windows. My car has a safe place to live there too. There is ease and no resentment and safety and quirks.
ways this could work-
Someone I know could know of something. I could find it on Craigslist. I could find it in the paper. I could talk to just the right person at the right time. I could go for a drive and see a for rent sign. I could … see something I already saw in a new light. I could… magic something up.
My commitment-
keep doing shiva nata. keep asking people if they know of anything. keep visualizing it. Keep listening for possible leads.
Ask #2
Steady income producing activity. Being a jack of all trades is an appreciated, respected quality. Schedules are flexible. I get to work on my time. The money is comfortable. There is no needy grabbiness. Travel is a bonus.
ways this could work-
I can put together the portfolio website I’ve been procrastinating on. Beyond that I have no clear idea. Maybe revisit or make a tactics list. What I want feels like it will be an invented position. Not something I stumble on in Craigslist or classified ads. although i will keep looking.
My commitment-
Have a cup of coffee with it and see if it shows itself more clearly. The end goal is the income and what becomes possible with that. there may be another answer. so i commit to staying open to those other answers. let it be fun.
Ask #3 and #4
(silent retreat)
‘Til next week VPAs. We really should do this more often 😉
OMG can I just say hahahahaha I KNOW A BOND GIRL!!! What could be better? Seriously. I am doing a little wheeeee! lap around my living room (in my green suede beaded spike-heeled sandals) because, YAY! I know a Bond Girl!
Should Bond Girl ever need some pink lipstick, she might dig Lancôme’s Rouge in Love in shade 377, “Midnight Rose.”
Also OMG RALLY. Holy shit.
Max! I love you and I love your lipstick! And good grief, I must know more about these sandals.
Looking for this week:
Clarity about a new mode of transportation (and ease about getting the old one transitioned away from me). Have discovered some unexpected connections with a local car-leasing guy, so maybe I can go and talk to him and offer some less-usual negotiating points.
Plans that happen as planned, instead of falling apart in the middle. Alternatively: a way to feel grateful that I did not throw more resources than I did at the falling-apart situations, instead of resenting the time I spent on projects that weren’t going to go anywhere.
Superpower for this week: Equanamity and Equilibrium.
Bonus wish: Opportunities to squee about Stompopolis with friends!
This week–I would love
Major replenishment. Transformation. New paths forming. New physical rejuvenation options.
Getting the thing done easily without hurting myself.
More time in the radical yurt (proxy) (sort of)
Release of more of the old stuff .
Clarity. Spaciousness. Ok.
Silent retreating this week, while advancing forward and collecting gold coins and things that go “plink.”
Sending warms wishes to everyone for everything!
Ah, the sandals: Henry Beguelin: http://shop.henrybeguelin.it/ Or ebay for economy.
And I blame Bond Girl, for introducing me to Burn Notice, which I LOVELOVELOVE and which has seriously reorganized my wardrobe.
Oh yes.
I’m going to try some messy VPAs tonight! Throwing paint at the canvas! Permission to be sloppy!
1. I have a tricky email to write. I want it to be sovereign, loving, confident and strong. I want to be able to apologize without feeling shame.
2. I’m going to a conference this Friday! I will see many people there who have not seen me in years. I want to be comfortable, authentic, at ease. I want to have a good day.
3. I want to publish a blog post tomorrow.
4. The Y.E.A.R. begins this week! Embarking! This means a lot to me. I want to celebrate. I want to be conscious and free. I want to be present for this present to myself, which means so much.
Qualities I’m noticing here: Conscious Entry (and probably exit, too, come to think of it). Sovereignty. Joyful action. Right timing.
(What if nothing is wrong? What if any time can be the right time, just by naming it and claiming it?)
Activate!
Embarking! Yes! Today is the day! Very Excited. 🙂