Friday chickenIn which I cover the good stuff and the hard stuff in my week, trying for the non-preachy, non-annoying side of ritual and self-reflection.

And you get to join in if you feel like it.

Okay, this is getting to be a little ridiculous. Time, stop with the flying. I cannot believe it is Friday.

But apparently it is. Again!

The hard stuff

The one night where there was no back to sleep.

Morning began for me at one thirty. That is to say, not very long after midnight.

And it stayed morning.

And at 5:52 that song came on and it was really too much.

Overdoing.

Working way too hard, preparing way too hard, wanting way too hard.

So tired that I couldn’t remember people’s names.

This never happens, because it’s one of my superpowers.

It was disorienting and alarming and generally not fun.

Zombie fog.

I don’t really have anything else to say about that.

If it hadn’t been for the sandwich gnomes, I might have fallen apart completely.

Waiting.

It is not the thing I am best at.

Sadness.

Also not the thing I am best at.

That one horrible thing that was horrible.

I’ll silent retreat on that.

Rally goes by way too unfairly ridiculously fast, you guys!

It was Rally this week. Rally!

And I LOVE Rally and it always ends too soon.

The good stuff

Making things congruent.

Like deleting thirty numbers from phone. And renaming other ones. Sneakiness!

Like depiling a hundred piles of iguanas and doom.

Like revising my system of Anthologies.

Ohmygod Season Opener ohmygodohmygod GNR!!!!!!!!!!!!

I have been going out of my mind waiting for roller derby season to start up again.

It’s a lot of fun running trainings for the team I fanatically sponsor/support/live-for, but you know what’s really fun?

Watching them TEAR IT APART in an actual bout. Guns N Rollers destroyed the Heathers at the season opener, and I was proud and happy.
And here’s Amanda’s awesome recap, if you want it broken down.

It’s been a looooong time coming. I really needed that.

Our new drafts (Frank N Hurter and Scouts OnHer) looked amazing, I could not be more ecstatic about having Braidy Punch on the team this year, and everyone managed to do a lot of damage and have a good time. It was spectacular.

I have been happy about this all week, and I will CONTINUE to be happy about this for years.

And Juno made us scarves!

Juno!

Remind me to post a picture of Selma in her tiny little GNR scarf. It is adorable.

Lots of wonderful old Turkish lady yoga.

Happy happy happy rolling around on the floor.

Yay for being (theoretically/symbolically) old and Turkish.

The day of done.

One of the reasons I’m so wiped out is because two days this week were the DAYS OF GETTING MASSIVE AMOUNTS OF STUCK THINGS UNSTUCK AND DONE.

That was brilliant.

The Mirror Pool page.

I have been working on the Mirror Pool since September.

It is, among other things, the self-guided entrance exam-that-is-not-at-all-an-exam-but-actually-a-door for my new Floating Playground program.

I needed this page to be an experience. I needed it to be able to teach and to love and to reflect and transform, to set culture and release expectations at the same time. I needed it to do all sorts of things. And I needed it to do MAGIC.

It was a ton of work, and just reading the mirror pool page is basically the equivalent of a graduate program in destuckifying. In fact, if you were to use it as a training manual, which you totally could, it would be worth your entire tuition just for that.

Anyway, getting it ready for the public (and getting me ready to show it to the public) was a big, important process. And this week it happened.

7500 words. We ask people to give it an hour of undivided attention and process, with conscious entry and exit. It’s INTENSE.

But it does the thing it was meant to do. And that, in and of itself, is extraordinary.

The beautiful things people have said about the Mirror Pool page.

Thank you to everyone who emailed and DMed to say how powerful/beautiful/transcendent the experience of visiting the Mirror Pool was.

I cannot even tell you how much I appreciate that.

The Floating Playground is already close to full!

Despite the fact that I have hardly done anything at all to tell people about the fact that it exists.

This is a very good sign.

Rally (Rally!)

This week was Rally (Rally!), and Rally was sublime.

Rally #16 was full of shining, beautiful wonderful surprises, and I madly love every single person who was there.

It was absolutely magical, and I don’t know what to say other than that. Mmmm, Rally glow.

The Enthusiastic.

We convened a fabulous Enthusiastic at Rally, and it was the most fun and inspiring experience.

A thing I thought was going to be really hard turned out to be really great!

And now I don’t need to spend today getting the Playground ready for the sparkling cleaning Heinzelmaennchen.

(Related: I am a supergenius! Though, yes, it took being very-much-not-a-supergenius fifteen times in a row in order to get to that point.)

The fun part of the Chickening happens here.

Tabstravaganza! Or: what’s Havi been up to with all those open Firefox tabs?

  • Anna wrote beautifully about a music-related Shiva Nata epiphany: you should definitely read this.
  • You guys! Steph is amazing! She made these gorgeous scarves that will be for sale in the Playground Toy Shop. Excitment! I will buy the first one and wear mine the second it arrives.
    Also she has the best tagline ever: I knit so I don’t kill people.
  • Loved the drawing in this sweet post from a blog reader: Logistics Me is 400 pounds and is sitting on top of Adventure Me.
  • Here are some notes from the monster manual. And did you see this drawing?! I love it when people post pictures of their colored-in monsters!
  • She said very seriously, Max I’m so sorry I can’t talk right now – I have to pay total attention to this cake.

From the archives.

Some old, weirdly pertinent posts that I don’t remember having written, encountered while looking for something else:

  1. My stuck isn’t talking and also there is a trapeze.
  2. What is true? What else is true?
  3. Internal Courtroom Drama.

Playing live at the meme beach house — it’s the Fake Band of the Week!

Background? Ez and I make up bands. Stu (retired Bolshevik-fearing voice-to-text software) once translated “people will hate me and be jealous” to “they’ll hang out at my Meme Beach House“. It’s just one guy.

This week’s band is brought to you via Rally #16!

Emergency Little Book of Poems

They play quiet, sweet little pieces, lots of harmonies.

Though, of course, it’s really just one guy.

Hallo Hallo! I am saying Hallo Hallo. Announcement time.

Picture me wearing that crazy hat

  1. Early brunch prices on the Floating Playground (aka the Floop!) are good for TWO MORE DAYS. January 29 is the last day for that. That’s Sunday.
  2. If you want to come to a Rally (Rally!) this year, do it! Most of the 2012 Rallies are already full. There are openings in March, May, July and September.

That’s it for me …

Join my Friday ritual in the comments if you feel like it. Or call silent retreat!

We let people have their own experience. We’re supportive and welcoming. And we don’t give advice (unless people specifically ask for it).

Wishing you a glorrrrrrrrrrrrious day, a restful weekend and a happy week to come.

Shabbat shalom.

p.s. It’s fine if it’s not Friday anymore. There’s complete chicken amnesty — join in whenever (or not) and it’s no big deal.

The Fluent Self