Where I cover the good and the hard in my week, visiting the non-preachy side of ritual and self-reflection.
Operation Jewel Star is still in full effect. Highest level of internal security clearance activated. In my head.
All that to say: it makes sense (to me) that I am secretly a princess because right now I am secretly a lot of things. And this weekend I am returning from two weeks at the Vicarage, and I feel conflicted about this.
It is Friday. Let us check in with our week. I miss you guys.
What worked?
Breakfast!
As my brother and I like to say, it’s the three most important meals of the day.
And planning ahead.
Next time I might…
Have a new book on my phone for the transition day. Or some special stones to skip. A plan.
Eight breaths of hard, challenging and mysterious.
- Really missing my fellow agents on this solo mission. Monsieur LeBlanc, Agent Mueller, The Lovely Em Dee. A breath for wanting a hug.
- Adjusting. A breath for, again, transitions and adaptation.
- “It’s familiar but it is different”. The most uncanny sensation. A breath for now is not then but part of me wants it to be then.
- Wanting things that I can’t do for a while and wishing I could do them now and feeling impatient. A breath for where I’m at.
- The pace of change does not always fit the form that is meant to contain the change. Trying to prepare for an important internal process is like buying clothes for toddlers. A breath for rapidly cycling through big internal shifts.
- I am getting used to having time to myself, and I don’t want this quiet time to end. Thinking about how to navigate this. A breath for wanting what I want, and the fear that I won’t get it.
- Expectations. A breath for releasing them. Mine, of course. And also everyone else’s.
- Inhale, exhale. Goodbye, mysteries and hard moments of this week.
Eight breaths of good, reassuring, delight-filled.
- Getting to surprise a friend. A breath for delight.
- Aaaaahhhh back to feeling like a queen (but secretly a princess). A breath for a successful mission run in a sovereign and harmonious way.
- Operation switcheroo was easier than I thought it would be. A breath for ease.
- View. Horizon. A breath for perspective.
- Writing and stone skipping. A breath for doing what I love this week. Because I’m not at work! And the wish that soon I’ll get to do this at work too.
- Feeling radiantly alive and in my element. A breath for possibility.
- Expansiveness. A breath for hope, and for the loosening of blocks.
- (Being quietly present with my heart)
Superpowers!
A superpower I had this week…
Being a bell.
And a superpower I want next week.
Not caring what anyone thinks!
Salve.
The salve of those two superpowers combined!
When you put it on, you are resonant with the things you want to be resonant with. You ring the bell of peacefulness and you are peacefulness. And also you don’t care what anyone thinks. Because you’re a bell.
These salves can’t be seen, but the production factory delivers enough for distribution by way of the magic of the internet, so help yourself. There is enough.
Playing live at the meme beach house — the Fake Band of the Week!
Background. Ez and I make up bands. Stu (retired Bolshevik-fearing voice-to-text software) once invented hanging out at the Meme Beach House“. It’s just one guy.
This week’s band is called:
Walling The Hits
And yes. It’s just one guy.
Hallo Hallo! I am saying Hallo Hallo. ANNOUNCEMENT.
You guys you guys you guys!
There are a few open spots left for individual Alphabet Carousel Rallies.
- You can come to ONE RALLY.
- There is also an option to bundle TWO rallies at a discount, or THREE at even more of a discount.
Or get a pass to come to AS MANY RALLIES AS YOU WANT. It’s a pretty great deal.
IF you are in the Floop and signing up for just one Rally, log-in to the Floop and use the Secret Benefits page for Floop discount. If you’re in the Floop and want more than one Rally, use the Rally page because there is no combining discounts and that’s the better deal. 🙂
That’s it for me …
Join my Friday ritual in the comments if you feel like it. Or call silent retreat!
We let people have their own experience. We’re supportive and welcoming. And we don’t give advice (unless people specifically ask for it).
Wishing you a glorrrrrrrrrrrrious day, a restful weekend and a happy week to come.
Shabbat shalom.
p.s. It’s fine if it’s not Friday anymore. There’s complete chicken amnesty — join in whenever (or not) and it’s no big deal.
Follow
Cheers, Chickeneers!
Not caring what anyone thinks!
The best!
@Katie & The Chickeneers: Cheers!
Frrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrriday! Hello Friiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiday!
[placing my ear to different parts of bellness]
What worked?
Permission to return stuff to the library.
Permission to miss out.
Next time?
(Wool)gather less. Sit out even more.
Eight breaths of mysterious, challenging, hard:
1. Bugs munching on me and my garden. A breath to accept damage.
2. Feeling grazed by invisible shoes. A breath to dissolve passive aggression.
3. Things to write — but it isn’t the time to write them. A breath for prioritizing.
4. Payment/replies on slow boats. A breath for patience.
5. Camera and food processor both need repair or replacing. A breath for long-term budgets.
6. Had to turn down a project: right fit, wrong time. A breath for respecting limits.
7. Man, I hope it’s not the miso that caused the digestive distress. A breath for safety.
8. The choices I’ve made mean that I’m not as connected or close to various people as I sometimes would like to be. Naturally, the consequences feel sharpest during chagim and the like. A breath for acceptance.
Breathing in the delight-filled, reassuring, good…
1. Finished a recording I’ve been working on since May. A breath for slow dedication.
2. Some answers received! A breath for resolutions.
3. Work percolating along. A breath for income.
4. Sticky sunscreen means I don’t scratch. A breath for chemistry.
5. Darling doggies; funny, fabulous friends. A breath for love.
6. Shedding this and that. A breath for unburdening.
7. Writing mojo back in da haus. Breathing hard and happily.
8. Tealixir kombucha on tap at the Sunflower Cafe. A breath for delicious potions!
Warm wishes to all y’all!
What Hannah said! The VERY best.
Hello Chickeners!
The suck this week was my very very bad cold, but not just the cold:
-the cold that woudl not let me breathe
-the same week as the RainStorms of Doom
-and my car’s radiator leaking due to my stupid
-and the car repir of 550+ clams
-and not being able to just be sick and go rest, still had to do stuff and couldnt just sleep
-and how thatplays into the I’m not cared for narrative that i have but that really doesnt serve me to feed into
-and going to work after one day but having to leave at lunch, but not til after i had made some sad and stupid mistakes that will take more ffort to fix on monday
-and then the schoold were closed and i was home with the kids today when i had kinda wanted to fall over and pass out for a few hours please?
-this was one of those weird trippy/psychically aware colds. i had srange dreams. i had weird vibes, and i sat with hours of regret, embarasment, chagrin and the feeling that i fucked up bad and it was beyond remdedy.
-migraines for the win!
-and a strange bundle of weird and conflcit i’m naming Grayrat. dont kow what i make of it
-i am in deep judgment and lack of compassion for everyne these days, espcially my kids and myself
but thru it all there was some sparkle:
-realinzg no one at work expecst me to come in when i’m feverish and contagious
-having a freind rescue me by dropping off her kid for cheris et playwith AND THEN having Cherise over there for a sleepover
-Compassing! I set up a Compass for the whole lunation and have already been able to access those qualities very fst and effectively
-the elegance of finding ways to bring my Fluent self tools to all parts of my life, feels integrated and full of ease
-more ritual overall
-finding myself able to let go, relax, to let thinsg eb with the kids, to find more enjoyment by letting go fo the need to constnatly be doing doing doing
– a beautiful new journal and lots of clarity on all my projects
-the excitement of fall around the corner, of mabon so soon, of the Wheel turning
Hello, Chickeneers! Havi, I’ve missed you too, it makes me smile whenever I see a new post from you 🙂
P.S. This is the international lady of mystery who formerly commented as Whitney.
What worked?
Keeping my containers/boundaries more firm. They feel a little less theoretical and a little more real now.
What might I try?
More of this approach, which is to say, not making boundaries because I’m Supposed To. Figuring out what feels best for me, and making that the default, and only moving things around when I truly want to.
Four breaths of Hard/Painful:
-Shoulders! A breath of ease.
-Confusing missives and staff-room talk about The State Of Things. A breath of clarity.
-Doing a last-minute favor for some dear friends. I don’t regret doing it, but it was hard to adjust to not having the afternoon to myself. A breathe of release.
-A random headache yesterday. A breath of comfort.
Four breaths of Good/Sweet:
+Making tiny changes that are symbolic because I say so! A breath of not caring what other people think.
+Payday! A breath of sustenance
+My monthly transition thing was just what I needed, and I learned so much. A breath for retreating.
+Working with my students is so much fun. A breath of joy.
My superpower of this week: Remembering about breathing in Qualities, especially when I needed a break and I couldn’t take one. Maybe breathing in some qualities can be a tiny break…
My superpower of next week: Focusing on just the right things
Oh Friday Chicken I adore you! :applies salve:
What worked:
Calling my lovely doctor. Telling her what my brain was doing. Having her say “we will find the right molecule.” The possibility that what has been isn’t what will always be. Hope.
The mysteriously delightful:
My primary care physician, who is so smart and her brain is so full of all the things she has to know and yet there is still room for all the caring parts.
Seeing the things I need to work on if I want to move up in my career. And thinking that maybe I will actually care about them if my brain molecules are working properly.
Friends who could see what my brain was doing and loved me enough to say “it doesn’t have to be like this.”
Clients who send me money before I send them a bill.
Neurons working like they should. Lights on, shades up.
Havi — how delightful it sounds, to be alive and in your element.
The hard and mysterious this week:
– Pain. It sucks and it limits what I can do.
– MrB’s painful stucknesses, emotional and physical and on the computer. I need to be able to access something on his computer via an app that is not working right and that he is trying to fix, so that I can deal with:
– That One Thing, the elephant-sized iguana.
The good and lovely:
+ My classes. Students who really want to learn and who like the way I teach. Teaching is fun.
+ Realizing that my class at the community college starts on Monday.
+ Noticing how often in my life I’ve had jobs that I really loved, and how, even with the ones that weren’t so great, I often had amazing coworkers. Am I a lucky woman?
+ My writing projects. Info comes in and words flow off my fingertips.
+ Walking. In the park. In the neighborhood.
+ Extreme bargains on books. I got one, cover price $16.95 for 27 cents. New.
+ Internet companionship during the night hours.