What's in the gallery?
We dissolve stuck and rewrite patterns. We apply radical playfulness to life (when we feel like it!), embarking on internal adventures (credo of Safety First). We have a fake band called Solved By Cake. We build invisible sanctuaries, invent words and worlds, breathe awe and wonder.
We are not impressed by monsters. Except when we are. We explore the connections between internal territories and surrounding environment to learn what marvelously supportive delicious space feels like, and how to take exquisite care of ourselves. We transform things.* We glow wild.**
* For example: Desire, fear, worry, pain-and-trauma, boundaries, that problematic word which rhymes with flaweductivity.
** Fair warning: Self-fluency has been known to lead to extremely subversive behavior, including treasuring yourself unconditionally, unapologetically taking up space, experiencing outrageously improbable levels of self-acceptance, and general rejoicing in aliveness.
What's in the gallery?
We dissolve stuck and rewrite patterns. We apply radical playfulness to life (when we feel like it!), embarking on internal adventures (credo of Safety First). We have a fake band called Solved By Cake. We build invisible sanctuaries, invent words and worlds, breathe awe and wonder.
We are not impressed by monsters. Except when we are. We explore the connections between internal territories and surrounding environment to learn what marvelously supportive delicious space feels like, and how to take exquisite care of ourselves. We transform things.* We glow wild.**
* For example: Desire, fear, worry, pain-and-trauma, boundaries, that problematic word which rhymes with flaweductivity.
** Fair warning: Self-fluency has been known to lead to extremely subversive behavior, including treasuring yourself unconditionally, unapologetically taking up space, experiencing outrageously improbable levels of self-acceptance, and general rejoicing in aliveness.
Blogging therapy: Why even bother when other people are doing it better?
Number three in a series on how to take some of the scary out of blogging.
The first time we talked about what if people are mean to me? And then last week we talked about what if I throw a party and no one shows up?
This time we’re talking about why even bother when there are already other people doing it better?
And again, this is also for you even if you’ve never had a blog and never plan to — or if you’re a blogging superstar.
Because guess what? Feeling like you’re not good enough and dealing with all the other what’s-the-point-isms is human. It’s normal. It’s your “stuff” talking.
And working through it is important and vital because — like it or not — the world needs you. At the very least, someone in the world needs you!
But let’s not get ahead of ourselves. First we just want to meet the fear. Ready?
Aaaagh! Why even bother when there are already other people doing it better?
When it feels like, okay, maybe you’re good — but you’re not that good…
All right. You’re absolutely allowed to be scared. You’re allowed to feel worried about not being good enough. You’re allowed to wonder if there’s even a point to trying.
This is one of the biggest scary bits to blogging. For sure. Okay, here we go.
Maybe other people are doing it better: five things to think about.
1. So what?
This is where I wish I weren’t this sweet, accepting yoga person so I could channel Naomi and yell Yeah? So the #$&@ what? So what so what so WHAT?!?!
Sigh. I’m not Naomi.
So I’m going to channel Selma (my duck) instead and see if we can find a way to say this in a way that might trigger slightly less resistance. (Though I’m not at all convinced that we’ll be able to pull it off … this stuff is tough.)
Okay. So yeah, maybe other people are doing it better. Maybe you feel frustrated because you think you’re just going to be taking up space.
Even assuming that this were true, so what? Why does this exclude you from the equation?
How does that idea even work?
I’m not Richard Russo so I shouldn’t write at all? If I said that to you, you’d slap me silly.
(And yes, I’ve said it to myself on more than occasion. Being human: it happens to the best of us, I guess.)
So we know on some level that we’re being a bit absurd and yet it feels true. And when it feels true, all the “so whats” in the world aren’t useful anymore.
In this case, I think what might help here is if I let you in on a leeeetle secret about the world of blog.
2. Something critical that you maybe don’t understand about blogging.
And I’ll say it twice so you don’t miss it. There’s always always always room for more.
There is always room for more. Always.
You really think that the world is not big enough for two _______s?
Sure, I could give you that “every soul is an individual snowflake” thing but we don’t even have to go there because the world is actually big enough for a hundred ________s, maybe considerably more.
I read Naomi every day. If you’re a fellow Itty Biz fan, you’re probably thinking “But wait, Naomi doesn’t post every day. Not even close.”
You’re right. And yet I read her every day. Every. Single. Day.
Because at some point during the day I need a dose of Naomi. So I head over there and reread something I’ve already read. Just to hear her voice. Just because I like being there.
So there’s only one Naomi, of course, but if there were other people talking about similar things with a similar voice? As a reader, that’s only good news for me.
If there were fifteen Naomis I would read them all. If there were THIRTY Naomis and they each posted once a day (impossible!) I would STILL read them all.
There is a depressing lack of stuff that rocks. Which means that there is room for you.
The blogs I love to read are my joy. And when I’m done reading the handful of favorites there’s nothing left to do except press refresh over and over like a sad and hopeful mouse at a feeder. *sigh*
As a blogger, I also want to be unique and special and all that crap. But as a reader? I wish with all my heart that there were a hundred versions of Naomi or Pam or Jenny or Black Hockey Jesus because I would read them all and then wish for more.
There IS room for you. For you and for a hundred imitations of you and for the people who in six months will be thinking of you when they say “Man, I wish I could be like that amazingly awesome _____ who writes _________!”
It does not matter how many people are already doing what you want to do or doing it better. There will always be people hungry for more.
Why can’t you be the one to give it to them?
3. How can you know that you’re not that person — that voice — that people need?
Okay, this is where we double back to that “every soul is an individual snowflake” thing I said we wouldn’t talk about.
You cannot know. You absolutely cannot know what other people need right now in this moment. It might very well be that what they need is you. And not just you, but you exactly where you are right now.
You can’t see your gifts. You can’t see your humanity or how heart-breakingly beautiful it is.
You can’t see how useful it is for other people to know that stuff is hard for you too or that you’re also going through things that they experience.
But the rest of us know. We, your “right people”, can see it. And we need you.
It’s not fair of you to hide from the people who need you. What you know and think is valuable just because you are who you are.
4. Man, you’re talking like a real blogger now!
You know what? This tendency to think that somehow your stuff isn’t good enough? Natural and normal. Everyone feels this.
Before I started blogging I also had the thoughts that said “Oh come on, Pam Slim is already doing it, so why even bother?” or “I’ll never be as influential as Seth Godin.”
Yes, that was stupid. And not even the point. But I didn’t realize it then.
Thinking that all those people are somehow legitimate and you aren’t? Completely normal. Completely understandable. Completely human.
It’s also not an excuse.
So come on — join us, and become yet another “possibly irrelevant and boring” self-doubting blogger! Because the good news is that this feeling will go away.
And if it doesn’t right away, hang out here some more and read up on ways to change your patterns, because if that feeling is not a big ole life pattern, I don’t know what is.
5. If it’s showing up in your blog, it’s showing up in your life.
Exactly. This pattern of thinking that for some reason other people are allowed to thrive but you aren’t? It’s something that’s true for Life In General, and not just for blogging.
This what-iffery is something that can show up in every field and in every aspect of life.
So what if I’m a good musician? There are already great musicians. So what if I help people as a therapist? There are already better therapists. And so on.
Where would we be if Einstein had decided that he could never be Isaac Newton so why even bother? Or even if George Clooney had decided that he could never be Marlon Brando so why not just hang it up?
You’ll never be those people. But you will be you and there is room for that. Because there is something for everyone.
I find plenty of blogs to be painfully boring. But many of these very blogs have enormous followings, and you know what? They help people.
They don’t help me, but that’s completely okay — it’s only because I’m not one of their “right people”. They help other people. Your job is to write for your people. And don’t worry about who they are just yet, because they will find you.
There is something for everyone. There is room for you.
But until you do some work with this pattern, it’s going to follow you around everywhere and poke at you until it gets the attention it deserves.
Reassurance time again!
This is where you stop me and say, “Okay, fine. I’ll start the damn blog. But I don’t even know if I have anything to say. I mean, what am I going to say? I don’t even know what to talk about!”
And this is where I point out how awesome it is that you’re no longer thinking you shouldn’t write one because all those other people are already doing it, and instead you’re worried about things like content and how-to.
We’re chasing the worry and the what-ifs, and they’ve shifted to a new place. And that is very, very good news.
We’ll be talking next week about not knowing what to talk about! In the meantime, rejoice in knowing that if you aren’t the next Havi & Selma? Rock on, because you being you is not as depressing as you think.
And if you are the next Havi & Selma, that’s also great because there are a ton of people who will be jumping for joy to have more of this kind of thing.
And either way, Selma and I want to be reading your blog, so point us in the right direction!
P.S. If all this stuff is freaking you out, take advantage of the “fact” that it’s Non-Sucky Yoga Month and book yourself some yummy, relaxing yoga time with yourself.
Because non-sucky yoga will calm you the heck down and everyone knows that calmification is good for the soul. And also for your blog.
P.P.S. This is a total aside, which you can ignore if you are not Richard Russo. If you are Richard Russo, let me just say this. Richard Russo! Why do you not have a real website? Argh. Hire me. Or hire my designer. Or both. Because this is a disaster.
OMG! It’s Non-Sucky Yoga Month!
Or: It’s an Ask Havi post gone horribly wrong …
I started writing an Ask Havi, and things went oh, slightly differently than I’d planned.
Yeah, people write to me all the time with questions … but there are a few questions that are different.
These are the ones that get asked with such predictable frequency that a. I really should put up a QTAAWPF (Questions That Are Asked With Predictable Frequency), and b. I kind of get worn out and don’t feel like being nice and answering.
Yes, I know it’s called a FAQ. But QATAAWPF is more fun to say. And looks vaguely like it should mean something in Arabic. Or would if it weren’t for the ‘p’.
I’m totally being goofy to avoid the fact that I don’t feel like writing a FAQ. Don’t make me write a FAQ!
Anyway …
The most frequently asked question.
It’s kind of weird, but the question that gets asked most in my business actually has hardly anything to do with my business.
People who know I’m serious about yoga come to me for advice on what yoga materials would be the best to work with. Specifically they want to either start doing yoga or they want to get back to doing some yoga.
Much more specifically, they want recommendations from me for yoga DVDs that don’t suck.
Here’s the thing. Almost all yoga DVDs are disastrously awful.
I’m pretty much the most yoga-positive yoga-obsessed person you’ll ever meet. I even give it credit for saving my life and stuff.
Everything I do in my life is at least tangentially related to my yoga practice.
And I’ll still be the first person to say that suckiness and yoga dvds tend to go together like Woody Allen and neurosis.
I don’t know why that is, but yes, it’s depressing.
Sunsets, Hawaiian beaches, bikinis (I know, what?!) and people spouting gems like “A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step. Now work those abs!”.
Ew. Ew. Ew. Ew.
Ew.
The number of times I’ve thrown a yoga dvd at a wall or yelled obscenities at it is ridiculously high. In fact, if I can watch the first ten minutes of most of the yoga dvds I’ve seen without wanting to tear my hair out, I kind of feel like I’ve already done my yoga practice for the day.
Woo hoo! Practiced some compassion and something sorta close to non-judgmentalness. Didn’t even throw a fit. Total WIN!
The solution I came up with is kind of goofy, just so you know.
So I got to the point where I was just feeling tired of answering this question, partly because I answer it so often and partly because aargh, why is it that yoga is so awesome but yoga culture so depressing and crappy?
Something semi-drastic and properly wacky needed to be done. And no, I did not make my own yoga dvd. Though I may someday. Think goofier. And less time-consuming.
We talked just the other week about random days and the National Something Something Month phenomenon.
Well, I’m now declaring it Non-Sucky Yoga Month.
And since my conception of time is flawed, I might do this several times a year. Or whatever. It might really just be this once. We shall see!
Here’s how it works.
In honor of the first ever Non-Sucky Yoga Month, I put together a cool little package thing. Package thing!
The package thing consists of a supremely non-sucky (and in fact really great) yoga practice dvd plus some ebooklet-ey things, a mini-meditation to help you get in the mood for actually sticking the dvd in your dvd player and using it … and some other useful stuff.
And there will be a grand total of 54 of these packages.
Partly because that is a pretty auspicious magical-ey number in yoga, but also because that’s exactly how many dvds I’m ordering.
If they all go today, that will be it — Non-Sucky Yoga Month will be somewhat abbreviated.
But whether 54 people buy their non-sucky yoga package right now or whether Non-Sucky Yoga Month just comes to its natural end on the magical day, that’s just how many there are.
The magical day is Nov 3 which is magical not because of any yoga-related wackiness, but because it is the day on which you get your ebooks and recording, and I go the post office with a very large bag and mail you your dvd.
Yes, I know.
But two weeks is not a month, you say. Yes, you are right. I don’t have the energy to do this for a whole month and it’s my month, so this is just going to be a “it’s my party and I’ll cry if I want to” moment.
But though the availability of the dvd package thing may turn out to be more like Non-Sucky Yoga Fortnight, we’ll be talking on and off about the theme of “yoga — and why it shouldn’t suck” for the whole month.
If I remember.
Why I’m really doing this:
(Aside from my own convenience … because hey, now I won’t have to answer twenty emails!)
2. I really, truly want to help.
Yoga makes life better. If you’re doing yoga — and not hating it because of some ridiculous dvd getting on your nerves — you’ll be healthier, happier, calmer and more centered.
If I can be even a tiny part of that, then yay! Big crazy joy for me.
3. If I just recommend the dvd alone, you might not actually use it.
Because maybe you’ll get bogged down in a bunch of what-ifs or you’ll need some reassurance or you’ll have questions or you’ll just never be in the mood.
Which is why I put together as many resources as possible to ensure that it actually works for you instead of — tfu tfu tfu — just sitting on your shelf and making you feel guilty.
I’m pretty darned confident that the stuff I came up with will help you enjoy doing your practice. And doing it.
4. I need to impress someone.
Well, I don’t need to.
But I’ll be in Austin this January, hanging out with the amazingly great person who teaches the material in this exceptionally non-sucky yoga dvd.
Not hanging out. Taking his course. And I would love to be able to say, hey, I’m biggifying the hell out of you just for the fun of it and because I think you rock. I sold 54 of your dvds in two weeks!
Which is probably how many (aside from the ones coming from my recommendations) sell in a year, since yoga people generally tend to think that marketing in any form is evil and twisted.
Note to self: write a post that answers that.
So it would be really cool to be the person who promoted something awesome, and helped the good kind of yoga people feel a. happy and b. maybe even hopeful and excited about the possibility of selling lots of something and that not being gross?
5. I’m crazy about you.
I freaking love hanging out here with you guys on the blog and doing classes and all that stuff. And it would be so cool if we were all doing the same yoga practice and could talk about it and stuff.
Plus, you will love this.
This is the practice I do with my gentleman friend every single day after work.
And just so you know, my gentleman friend was 100% anti-yoga before he met me and did not believe that there could be a yoga dvd not filled with annoying pink-leotard-ed barbie dolls.
He likes this dvd even more than I do.
Because it’s down-to-earth, practical, relaxing and all about having a healthy, comfortable, non-cheesy relationship with yourself. So even if you’ve never done yoga and never plan to, you might love it too.
Happy Non-Sucky Yoga Month, you guys!
Yay, non-sucky yoga. Yay, talking about it on my blog.
If you have themes you want me to cover this month, put them in the comments or send me an email, and I’ll maybe do some more Ask Havi posts that are somewhat yogacentric.
Non-Sucky Yoga Month starts in … three, two, one. Ahhhhhhhhhh. I need to go stretch.
You can get the non-sucky yoga dvd package here if you’re so inclined. And if not, you can still hang out and enjoy the month I just made up. It’s all good.
Friday Check-in #11: the “extra weirdnesses” edition
Because it’s Friday AGAIN. And because traditions are important. In which I cover the good stuff and the hard stuff in my week, trying for the non-preachy, non-annoying side of self-reflection.
And you get to join in if you feel like it.
Checking in again …
Smile! Only if you feel like it, though.
Moving on.
The hard stuff
Everything getting on my nerves.
I don’t know. Blame my hormones. Blame the short, dark, cold days and gearing up for winter.
Blame Mercury in retrograde or whatever wacky planetary thing people like to give credit to for everything going weird.
But I’ve been feeling a lot of annoyance this week. Which resulted in my “I am a crank and I need to make fun of Blog Action Day” post. And an especially irritable, snarky post on the Dance of Shiva blog.
Who knows. Just general aaaaaaaaargh moments. I assume that part of this has to do with looking for a new place. And needing a personal assistant. And stuff like that.
It’ll pass. But that’s been the big challenge of my week: to not react right away. Taking time to go away and be kind with myself. Asking for a hug when I could use one.
Insane busy-ness.
This should probably actually go in the “good stuff” section … for two reasons.
One, my business is thriving like mad so that’s actually something to be happy about, and two, between the busy and the annoyed I’ve been motivated to institute better systems.
But first I just want a little guilt-free time to shake my fists and complain about how challenging it is for me to stay focused and centered when there’s so much going on at once.
After one ridiculously hard day where I pretty much spent all of it on the phone, it was finally clear that stuff had to shift. Effective immediately.
Did I …
a. rewrite the hire my duck page to be way, way, way more specific in its instructions?
b. cut down my hours that are available for clients?
c. have my assistant set up scheduling software right here on the site for the nice people who have already done every single thing I asked them to on the hire my duck page page?
d. all of the above?
If you chose d. as your answer, that is correct.
Anyway, all these things are now in place to help me stop being whiny, so hooray! And now, enough with the argh moments, and on to saying hooray for this new “stuff going a bit more smoothly” thing. And the good stuff that happened this week.
The good stuff
Foods! My, I am well-fed.
Truth be told, my gentleman friend always spoils me to excess (the best possible way to be spoiled, no?) but this week he outdid himself in the kitchen with wintry comfort foods and much all-around homemade deliciousness.
For example, a very, very thin-crusted toasted pizza with leeks, pear and vintage cheddar. YUM!
Another night there was a spicy potato-fennel gratin. And yesterday he made his outrageously great Moroccan cauliflower-potato stew. And twice he made me fresh carrot juice!
I stand by my “YUM!”
Turns out I’m an expert or something.
The super-famous super-awesome Jennifer Louden interviewed me and my duck this week for her upcoming product about Comfort in Fearful Times.
What does scare you, Havi? Uh, being interviewed?
It was great. And I’ve pretty much never had so much fun on an interview. We cackled inappropriately the whole time and I occasionally said something smart.
I am feeling completely joyful and flattered to have people I madly admire show up and admire me. Exciting!
Results. I kinda expect them, but they still ROCK!
One of my Procrastination Dissolve-o-Matic VIP-ers from Turkey just wrote to say that after our session she’d gone ahead and written those annoying, semi-terrifying emails she’d been putting off for ages … and applied to the program she’d been freaking out about.
And she got accepted. And she got a scholarship.
Yay! Exclamation points! Do a little dance with me!
Of course the best part of this week hasn’t even happened yet
Because my little brother is on a plane heading in this direction right now as I type this.
He’ll be staying with me the whole weekend and since he’s basically my favorite person in the entire world, I am jumping up and down and feeling pretty darn gleeful right now.
Operation Convince Ez To Move To Portland … starting in …. 3, 2, 1!
The weird stuff
Yes, we have a new category this week. For things which defy categories like “good” and “hard”.
I’ve slowly been adjusting to being “internet famous”. Right?
Well, I thought I had, until I saw that people are selling I ♥ Havi t-shirts online. And hoodies and stuff.
The shirts say I ♥ Havi (and Selma too) … and the weirdest part is that apparently I’m the only one who thinks it’s weird. Everyone else is all, ooh, I heart Havi too — which one should I get?
That’s it for me ….
And yes yes yes, absolutely join in my Friday ritual if you feel like it and/or there’s something you just want to say out loud too.
Yeah? What was something hard and/or good (or weird?) that happened in your week?
And, as always have a glorrrrrrrrrrrrious weekend. And a happy week to come.
Ask Havi #10: the “explain yourself” edition
Still catching up on the Ask Havi posts!
Today we have one that is very short, very to-the-point and very anonymous:
“I’d be interested in knowing how your business developed from the way it started to where you are now. How did you get from being a yoga teacher to this?”
Oh I wish I had a really good answer for you!
But I don’t think I do. Shall we stream-of-consciousness it? Let’s see …. scooby doo time travel noises…
It just kinda happened.
Right. Here’s what was going on.
I was teaching yoga in Tel Aviv and Ra’anana. I was doing that crazy yoga brain-training stuff that I can’t stop talking about. And I was doing a lot of intense work on my own patterns and habits.
Several of my friends — who were also yoga teachers — started coming to me for advice on things like how to quit eating sugar or start learning Russian or get up earlier in the morning.
And because we were all yoga people, I used a lot of yoga concepts and terminology to talk about the stuff we were working on.
This led into developing programs and workshops. And then people started wanting to hire me. And when people throw money at you and say teach me, and you can, it’s pretty hard to say no.
[Aside: obviously if you have any business sense at all — which at the time I didn’t — you know that saying no can be very, very, very good for business. But we can talk about that some other time.]
And then some more stuff happened.
I got bored with teaching physical yoga. It occurred to me that in a physical yoga class you kind of get cheated out of the real yoga part of it.
Like, it ends up becoming all about the body and the poses, and then as a teacher you have a few seconds here and there where you can sneak in the wisdom and the helper-mouse bits.
So I stopped teaching yoga-yoga and focused on teaching how to apply yoga concepts to real-life problems. And using the Dance of Shiva work as one of the tools.
This is around the same time that my whole Fluent Self system of self-learning and self-work mysteriously came into existence.
I threw myself into documenting the system so that it could be teach-able. I launched this very website (over three years ago now). And people showed up to learn.
Not enough, though.
I can write more about this later, but probably the biggest business lesson I’ve learned is this:
No one cares about your stupid system!
Seriously you can have the best system in the world (and I do) and it just isn’t that relevant.
No one wakes up and says, “Gee I wish I had a system for solving my problem. You know what I need? Some rockin’ methodology and a bit of theory!”
So … selling a system? Not a great business model. Being able to help everyone with everything? That’s also a bad idea.
Somehow, despite all of the things I was doing that should have ruined my business, I was still getting clients.
And I was teaching a bunch of workshops at yoga studios in San Francisco and Berkeley. And I started doing group programs and online programs and developing products. But it was a lot of work and … not a lot of fun.
Eventually I figured out that I should just shut up about my system already, and start talking about what it’s like to have patterns and habits that are getting in the way of you being your very fabulous self.
And biggifying your fabulous self while you’re at it.
And that’s when everything changed.
I started talking about stuckification and how much it sucks and what happens when our stuff trips us up. And what to do about it.
I started actively using the vocabulary I used in my head (stucknesses, biggification, doing the thing) in my noozletter and with clients.
I stopped taking those depressing classes at the SBA. And stopped working with all yoga studios except for the ones that a. weren’t run by total flakeroonies and b. did the work of contacting me and begging me to show up.
And mainly, I started having fun. And letting my business be more playful and goofy and generally more like something I would actually do.
And here we are.
So now I have to tell people that they have to wait over a month to do a session with me. And I have more time to spend on my writing. And things are pretty good.
As you know, I dumped the noozletter — and I also stopped “marketing”, in the traditional sense, altogether. I do zero marketing. Zero outreach. Nothing.
Instead I just hang out here and on a few other blogs and on Twitter. But not in any “strategic” way. For the fun of it. And, astonishingly, that seems to work just fine.
There’s still stuff I’m working on. But my business challenges at the moment are more administrative and team-related than anything else.
The very, very abridged version?
Like this:
- Learned yoga, internalized it, stopped doing it in any sort of “traditional” way.
- Learned business, internalized it, stopped doing it in any sort of “traditional” way.
- Now practicing yoga and practicing business in a loose, playful way.
- Now learning more about how to live yoga and thrive in business, all while being true to myself and being in authentic non-cheesy non-manipulative service to the people I really care about.
That’s it, I guess. Happy ending? Or no ending at all, really. Works for me at any rate.
Thanks for asking the question and for making me think about it. Because wow, now that you mention it, my life is kinda crazy.
You know what? Let me go away and think about that for a while. And then I’ll come back, and Selma and I will hang out with you in the comments.
Well, if you’re already here you might as well make fun of Blog Action Day with me
Oof, I hate starting a blog post with a disclaimer but I’m going to.
Okay, this bit is for people who aren’t regular readers and don’t know me and my duck yet.
Hi! We’re usually really sweet and nice. Ask anyone.
Oh, wait. That’s not the disclaimer. HERE is the disclaimer:
Okay. I hope we all know that poverty is an enormous global tragedy, and that we have big huge responsibilities as compassionate, caring human beings to do stuff and say stuff and heal stuff in our world. That’s why we’re here.
And just in case you need my “I care” street-cred before I make fun of Blog Action Day: I hope you all know that my duck, my gentleman friend and I all lead very conscious, very caring-based lives.
- We imposed a household Box-store Boycott over a year ago (broken only twice!). Take that, wasteful evil box stores!
- We eat only food that’s made (by us) from natural ingredients. We make our own bread, yoghurt, shampoo, conditioner, cleaning supplies etc.
- We make regular contributions to causes close to our heart including Project Open Hand, Global Fund for Women, Doctors Without Borders, Oxfam, etc. etc. etc.
I could go on, but you get the point. I care deeply about the world and the state of it.
Now can I make fun of Blog Action Day? Thank you.
On to the actual post. Finally.
If for some reason or at some point (like, I don’t know, maybe on international guilt-mongering day, for example) you find yourself on the Blog Action Day Blog, you’ll find a post on the following:
88 Ways to Take Action Against Poverty Right Now
Please don’t read it. It will just get on your nerves.
More like 88 Ways To Not Have A Point.
Because the vast majority of these 88 ways to “take action against poverty right now” are inane and even ridiculous. To the point that my former opinion on Blog Action Day (indifferent) has shifted to disheartened and frustrated.
Seriously, I’m not sure how it’s possible to even read this list without feeling as though someone is whacking your intelligence with a very large broom.
Sadly, it would be an absurdly long post if I were going to make fun of all the suggestions that I didn’t like … so instead let’s just look at the top ten.
And then a couple that don’t suck. Because you could totally go do one of those if you felt like it. Or not. Whatever. I’ll like you anyway.
Suggestions so ineffectual that they will make you want to cry
And my responses. Sorry for not being able to stop at ten. I tried to keep my irritation reigned in but … hmm, it didn’t really work:
1. “Be homeless for a day/night.”
That will help a lot of poor people have something to eat and a place to sleep. I’m sure they will appreciate it immensely.
Well okay, some of them might wonder why you didn’t at least let them sleep in that empty warm bed of yours so that someone might get some use out of your attempt to feel their pain.
If I were homeless (and I’ve been pretty scary-close to it in my life), I’d think you were the most condescending, pretentious person ever.
2. “Find a gripping picture or video having to do with poverty and publish it on the Web.”
See above. Consciousness raising is no longer a viable act in and of itself. Maybe it was in the sixties. It isn’t now when we’re so inundated with information. Yes, if you are writing about poverty than a picture may help people to grasp the severity of it all.
But if you live in a city, you see poverty and homelessness every day. It’s right there in front of you. What we need is not pictures. It’s the ability to respond to the pain of others and to our own.
3. “Stop being lazy.”
Feeling guilty and having all your internal resistance mechanisms triggered is a great way to get things accomplished! Works like a charm!
4. “Stop putting off adopting a child through an organization like Compassion International (or adopt another one).”
Because guilt is the very best reason to adopt a child. A guilt-ridden child is a happy child.
Actually, given overpopulation, if you’re already the kind of person who doesn’t have a problem doing things out of a feeling of responsibility and not out of a sense of love, you could consider not having kids at all. And then adopting. Because, yay adopting!
And whether you have kids or not, please please please go read World Without Us for some perspective on the impact our wastefulness is having not just on world poverty but on the future of the entire planet.
5. “Make flyers to stick in the local library.”
Or you could donate to a food bank. But whatever, flyers are a very useful way to place paper on library walls.
6. “Stop drinking Coke and bottled water for a day and save on plastic. Will save a lot of plastic if each of us does it for only one day.”
Or alternately: you could stop drinking and consuming everything that has chemicals and non-natural ingredients in it. And everything that’s made by enormous, wasteful bad-for-the-world corporations.
Love your body. Drink things that are meant to be drunk. Like water. Or things come from fruit or cows or I don’t know, maybe grains and hops.
And if you’re feeling the wish to give thanks for being in a place where staying alive is not your biggest struggle, then yeah, do it.
7. “Avoid overconsumption.”
Yes, that is something we should all do.
But given that we’re dealing with people who think not drinking Coke for a day is an enormous sacrifice, would you like to be more specific? Please, give me something concrete to do instead of another reason to feel bad.
8. “Ask your child to share her food with the child of your maid on that day.”
Your maid? What, now I have a MAID? What is this, 1789? Get thee to a guillotine!
I don’t even want to hear about it.
9. “Invite friends to watch documentaries about how poverty destroyed someone’s life, family and their future.”
Oh boy. Your friends will want to come over all the time!
How about having the kind of conversations and interactions with all the people we love that emerge naturally out of the stuff we’re thinking about and dealing with?
Otherwise it comes across as being contrived and manipulative, and — in an after-school-special “hey kids, I think we’ve learned something” kind of way — not very meaningful.
10. “Do not waste water on that day.”
Or any day. If we already know we’re wasting water, why do we need a day to stop it? We can just stop.
11. “Compose a poem on the theme ‘Making Poverty A History’ and get it published in a local magazine or paper. Also, ask your baby to recite the poem in her school.”
I am speechless.
Non-awful non-depressing suggestions.
Here are a couple of the very, very few ideas that did not completely get on my nerves:
Give music and opportunity to those who have none.
“If you have a musical instrument you no longer use, donate to the still-struggling musicians and students in New Orleans, who are still recovering from Hurricane Katrina. A few great organizations that will accepts musical instruments are Tipitina’s Foundation and The New Orleans Musicians Relief Fund.”
Love it.
Let’s learn to love and respect one another, and to give to those who have less.
Yes yes yes! More of that!
Visit The Hunger Site every day and click the link to feed the hungry.
It doesn’t cost you anything. It’s easy to do. And you don’t need to wait for one day of the year when a bunch of bloggers jump on a bandwagon. You can make it a daily ritual.
You want to really and truly make a difference?
Of course you do. I know you do. We all do.
And I firmly believe that it starts with bringing more conscious awareness into all aspects of your life. All the stuff we talk about here every day anyway:
- Consciously, actively making choices that impact your own well-being and that of those around you.
- Practicing clear communication.
- Doing this biggification work … so you can not be poor yourself … so that you can feel safe and supported giving generously of your time, money and energy.
- Nourishing yourself on every level so that you won’t be too depleted to care about the pain of others.
“I think we’ve all learned something, kids.”
Well, the “don’t post when you’re premenstrual” rule, for sure. But aside from that … no, I guess we didn’t.
So if you want to read a more amusing and less cranky post than mine about Blog Action Day, the incomparable Jenny the Bloggess did it much better than I ever could.
See you guys tomorrow.