What's in the gallery?
We dissolve stuck and rewrite patterns. We apply radical playfulness to life (when we feel like it!), embarking on internal adventures (credo of Safety First). We have a fake band called Solved By Cake. We build invisible sanctuaries, invent words and worlds, breathe awe and wonder.
We are not impressed by monsters. Except when we are. We explore the connections between internal territories and surrounding environment to learn what marvelously supportive delicious space feels like, and how to take exquisite care of ourselves. We transform things.* We glow wild.**
* For example: Desire, fear, worry, pain-and-trauma, boundaries, that problematic word which rhymes with flaweductivity.
** Fair warning: Self-fluency has been known to lead to extremely subversive behavior, including treasuring yourself unconditionally, unapologetically taking up space, experiencing outrageously improbable levels of self-acceptance, and general rejoicing in aliveness.
What's in the gallery?
We dissolve stuck and rewrite patterns. We apply radical playfulness to life (when we feel like it!), embarking on internal adventures (credo of Safety First). We have a fake band called Solved By Cake. We build invisible sanctuaries, invent words and worlds, breathe awe and wonder.
We are not impressed by monsters. Except when we are. We explore the connections between internal territories and surrounding environment to learn what marvelously supportive delicious space feels like, and how to take exquisite care of ourselves. We transform things.* We glow wild.**
* For example: Desire, fear, worry, pain-and-trauma, boundaries, that problematic word which rhymes with flaweductivity.
** Fair warning: Self-fluency has been known to lead to extremely subversive behavior, including treasuring yourself unconditionally, unapologetically taking up space, experiencing outrageously improbable levels of self-acceptance, and general rejoicing in aliveness.
Permission to take time.
If you’re only going to read one permission slip today — But why would you do that? Read all the permission slips! It’s fun! — I would go with this one.
I wrote this for myself. But you can have some too.
That is the magic of permission. There is absolutely no way that you could possibly diminish my supply of it by desiring permission for yourself as well. It is an infinite source.
Permission to take time.
Specifically:
Permission to take my time in any situation I need to take more time in, without having to know why or how much, without the taking of time being perceived in any way as negative.
If, for example, I need to pace around the room thinking thoughts and more thoughts before I sit down to do [X], that is allowed.
Yes, even if it takes 45 minutes. Even if it doesn’t feel like entry, guess what, it can also be entry.
If I can’t write copy for a thing until I can again, that taking of the time is ALLOWED and even good. Take it!
If I know a thing needs to end but I don’t yet have words to put the ending in place, I can take my time and wait for the words instead of thinking I’m a horrible person for not ending it the minute I realized it needed to end.
That is okay.
If I thought I needed four days to quiet my mind and reach a decision but actually I need more, then I need more. More time can be taken! Monsters who think that this time is endless are wrong, and they can consult the records on that account.
And this as well!
Guess what?
If I have passed all personally-imposed deadlines on a thing that is important, then those were not the right deadlines.
Clearly I need more time and that more-time is a big deal, so I can have that time to figure out what is useful about taking the extra time. There is time. There is something in there and I am allowed to want more time to find it.
PERMISSION TO TAKE MY TIME AND TO TAKE MORE TIME!
I feel strongly about this.
And if I could put it all on a popsicle stick, I would.
But: permission. And more permission.
The commenting blanket fort and how it works!
But first: a story. I wrote this permission slip for myself two weeks ago. Not really believing it 100% but wanting to so badly.
And I want to tell you guys that me-from-two-weeks-ago was right about everything. Everything.
If you would like to play, here are things that are welcome. You could invent your own permission slips, you could leave smiles or things that were sparked for you, you could rejoice in all the rejoicings, you can go on silent retreat!
The one thing we don’t do is tell other people how to be, feel or think. And the one thing we always do is take responsibility for our stuff when it comes up.
Love, as always, to the commenter mice, the Beloved Lurkers and everyone who reads.
Very Personal Ads #154: Visions of Possibility and Anticipation
Personal ads. They’re … personal! Very.
Each week I write these VPAs to practice asking for what I want. And to get clarity on what that really is, even when asking feels conflicted.
I always get useful information about my relationship with various aspects of the ask. Join in if you like!
Mmmmmm. Hello, Today. Today I woke up with wants. Breadcrumb trails of wanting. Let’s find out.
One more thing: today I am pretending that VPA does not stand for Very Personal Ads but instead is not-very-secret acronym code for Visions of Possibility & Anticipation, which feels thrilling. I need that right now.
Visions! Possibilities! Anticipation! Wanting all the wants.
It also fits with my new plan to make Monday a writing day instead of a working day. My day of Wishes & Glowing Desires. Yes, well, I’m in kind of a mood and everything is hilariously dramatic right now.
Anyway. This feels more playful and congruent with the more intimate practice that is being born, it has to do with a certain dedication to me and my me-ness more than what I was doing before, it’s kind of hard to describe right now.
Thing 1: Updating the updates.
Here’s what I want:
To make the updates. This covers both super mundane stuff and some big important things.
Firefox-wise and in other ways. Lots of other ways.
Ways this could work:
I can call on the superpowers of consolidation, assimilation, integration.
And I can ask for help. Oh, and I can process this on the Floop! Yay!
I’ll play with…
Finding out what the secret desire is behind the updates.
I think this is about wanting more harmony and congruence, but there is also something about transitioning into Incoming Me. This will require a lot of presence and permission too.
Scary! But I am committing to finding ways to make this feel fun, playful and light-hearted. And if I can’t find those ways, I will back off until I can.
Thing 2: Two things about words.
Here’s what I want:
Right now I am loving the words Assignation and Tryst.
Especially I am enjoying the symbolic aspects of +forbidden, +secret, +under-the-radar, +arranging, +lovers, +anticipation, +looking-forward.
This sounds like way more fun than say, appointments. Or meetings. I want to think of ways that I can turn more things into trysts.
And I want to rethink checklists again.
Ways this could work:
Of course my old compatriot metaphor mouse will be helpful here.
I am not going to ask for suggestions from people because I need to find words that reflect my own personal associations. I want something that comes from the attributes that are meaningful for me.
But I can do some stone skipping about that and investigate the themes.
I’ll play with…
Wanting what I want, and letting that be okay.
Or really, having the hypothesis be: what if that were okay?!?!
Thing 3: INDEPENDENCE!!!
Here’s what I want:
In this piece I wrote and shared at the Floop that was basically an essay on How To Be In Proximity To Havi, I said the following:
These are the things that are the most important to Havi in life! Independence, freedom, autonomy, playfulness, sanctuary, retreat, light-heartedness, possibility, agility, congruence, being the sovereign queen of her internal kingdom.
And that is true. That is a lot of independence. I want to look at more of the ways that I would like this independence to be a thing. In my home, my business, my life, my everything.
Ways this could work:
I can unpack some of my associations with this word.
The fourth of July could be useful, possibly? I mean, it’s coming up and I made a choice to live in this country, at least for now, and maybe there is something there.
I’ll play with…
Noticing what I already know about this.
Adding things to the shared pool of knowledge, as they call it in Crucial Conversations.
Generally being investigative, curious, receptive to knowing what I know.
Thing 4: Alice sees under things!
Here’s what I want:
This is from a line in the Phantom Tollbooth which is, obviously, the best book in the entire world.
There is this boy called Alec who can see through things, and then he says, “… and my little sister Alice sees under things.”
I am seeing under things. I am also seeing underthings. These are not the same but they are connected in weird and important ways. They were in my dream.
And Alice is also alles, which has to do a number of things, but especially with ALL THE ROSES, which was my clew last week at Rally.
I apologize that this is so vague, but I’m just going to leave it like this for now.
Ways this could work:
This one is going to require some serious OODs.
And some talking to the monsters.
I am going to ask for the superpowers of grace, agility, permission and trust. Yes, please.
And who knows, what if this could be easier than I think it can? Planting THAT.
I’ll play with…
Doing ridiculously hard Shiva Nata on it until I get my loving moments of truth.
Progress report on past Very Personal Ads.
Just to update you on what’s happened since last time.
Potter (my mouse) wanted a hat, and he does not yet have a hat. But I really enjoyed asking for him, and I am going to trust that one day he will have just the right hat and that will be grand. Also I am taking him to a hat parade!
Then I wanted ease-filled sovereign announcing, and it totally happened! And it was about a thousand times less painful than I’d imagined. JOYOUSNESS.
Then I wanted the construction noise at the Playground to go away because it was driving me crazy. And it did! The First Mate called the owner of the building and she yelled at the electricians for not checking with us about when they could be in the crawl space over where I teach, and they rescheduled for when I am not teaching!
MOVEMENT. Yay.
Then I wanted many small plumlets, and one is already almost written! That is huge.
There was an ask about [Boston/Astoria]. No physical progress yet but emotionally this feels way less impossible, so progress.
And I wanted quality time with Incoming Me, which I got but I still want more of. And I wanted to process sadness and it was processed in exactly the right way. Thank you. This practice has held me through so many things, and I am looking forward to these new visions of possibility and anticipation which is what I am going to think from now on when I say VPA.
Play-filled comment zen. Here’s what I’d love today.
- Wanted: Your own personal ads, small or large. Updates on past ones if you like.
- You can also do these on your own or in your head. You can always call silent retreat!
- Leave your gwishes! Throw things in the pot!
- Things we try to keep away from: the word “manifest”, telling people how they should be asking for things, unsolicited advice.
- VPA amnesty applies, of course. Leave yours any time between now and next Sunday (or whenever, really) — it’s all fine by us!
xox
Friday Chicken #203: Mouse Riots
In which I cover the good stuff and the hard stuff in my week, trying for the non-preachy, non-annoying side of ritual and self-reflection.
And you get to join in if you feel like it.
You guys! This week! This week! This was the best week!
I really needed a week like this with all that’s been going on the past several months.
90% of this week’s magical happenings were due to the incredible results from all the Shiva Nata we did at Rally, and also ohmygod Rally! (Rally!).
But also everything just kind of conspired towards presence this week. That feels really good to type.
Anyway, I’m glad to be here in this particular Friday at this particular moment. Hi, Friday. Hi, lovely people. Hi, ritual of checking-in through chickening.
The hard stuff
Today.
Today was hard. Very hard.
Needing to say a thing and not having the words for it.
Waiting for courage and waiting for insight, hoping that the choice to wait is the right one but not getting a hit one way or another.
Choosing patience and second-guessing it.
Missing something that is not here.
Longing can be really fun sometimes.
Except that at other times it’s kind of excruciating.
Not having pirate crew in place.
And then having to do a bunch of stuff at Rally that made way more work for me.
Also: not realizing that this was going to be as hard on me as it ended up being. So that was super interesting to notice, and also not fun.
Not having a checklist in place and all hell breaking loose.
Not really.
But definitely seeing just what kind of disastrous stuff can happen when that mechanism is not in place.
And also all the resistance and shame and distress around that.
I still need to re-metaphor-mouse checklists though, because that word is neither fun nor reverent.
And the thing that I want now is magical, special, vital, fun, vibrant, alive and even a little big holy.
So I need to sort that out.
The question. “What might I do differently if I got a do-over?”
That brought up a lot of painful stuff about THEN.
Process, grief, regrets, not-regrets, all of it.
Luckily once I realized that it was the wrong question for that particular moment, I was able to enter the situation with a new question:
“What would help me feel better?”
Misunderstandings and crossed wires.
First with the neighbors, then online, then at home.
Great.
The noise the noise the noise the noise.
The house next to the Playground, the electricians in the crawl space, the handyman on the roof, the dripping from the leak in the roof, so many forms of noise.
Migraine central.
I was extremely unhappy about this.
Seeing the vision and not knowing how yet.
Always challenging.
The good stuff
So! Much! Good!
It was kind of overwhelming, actually.
I’m not used to this. I could get used to this.
Rally!!!!
There are not enough exclamation points for how I feel about this.
It was Rally (Rally!) and it was Rally #21, and something about the twentyfirst-ness of it all just clicked for me.
I felt like I knew all of Rally’s secrets, and we were making magic together.
Also, this group was so amazing. And so much fun!
WHAT A JOY. I loved this Rally and I loved everything about it.
The park.
I was able to walk every day and go swing in the swings every day, and to visit all the roses.
The roses, they are spectacular. And I visited them every single day.
The unbelievably incredible Shiva Nata that I was doing on my own.
Oh brain, oh love oh delight.
Oh, epiphanies.
I am a melting puddle of appreciation, wonder, discovery and sparkling.
The unbelievably incredible Shiva Nata that I did at Rally.
This was a courageous, fun group and they were up for anything.
So I brought out the crazy. As I shared over on the Shiva Nata blog:
Intense is not even the word for it. It was extraordinary and glowing.
An outlandishly luscious class. We were subsumed by flames and stuff like that. Shiva was all hey lady, would you like some deconstruction because I can bring it. Like that. I may have broken them.Or we may have broken everything. But in the most compassionately loving and playful way ever. It was awesome.
Everything. Reconfigures.
And after the class was over and we were all internally reconfigured, I knew (in that fleeting moment) all the truths about all the truths. Including about the loving gift that is being harmonious with the truths.
And! One of our Shiva Nata combinations was “discovering all the delights and delighting in all the discoveries.” Wow.
And GET THIS. I DID THAT THIS WEEK! IT ACTUALLY HAPPENED.
That was a really big deal.
Marisa was here!
We had secret dinner and pub night, and then she came to the Playground to sneak me away to lunch in the park.
Everything is better now.
The shift.
The thing that has been the second biggest source of grief, pain and anguish for the past four months untangled itself, and I was finally able to write the post I’d been terrified of writing.
In TWENTY MINUTES.
The thing that I have been unable to say for months because of my fear of being misunderstood and/or everyone hating me for saying it ended up being easy and simple and pure.
That’s because Rally is magic and Shiva Nata is extraordinary.
I did it! I met my big fear that people would misunderstand me, and I was okay. And everyone said the sweetest things. And then of course later some people did misunderstand me, but that was also okay!
Do you see?
The other shift.
There was epically unbelievable destuckifying this week, which showed up in a brand-new superpower that I didn’t even know about and certainly had not imagined that I would now have it:
The superpower of IMPERVIOUSNESS.
I got it this week. It just showed up. Along with new and much better boundaries.
For some reason all the things that I normally might take personally just weren’t personal anymore. It was outrageously great.
Results and mice, because on those shifts.
In so many ways, but, for example, I said a ridiculously scary and most-vulnerable-ever thing to someone, and it brought all sorts of unexpected good things into my life.
Including a mouse riot. Several mouse riots! This is a proxy and I can’t explain, but just assume that this is the best possible thing ever, and that the thing that I desired is the thing that is actually happening, and that it’s even better than I was picturing it. Mouse! Riots!
And yes, these are the same mice who were serving lunch last week.
Getting to meet the most lovely and amazing people.
I got to be with the most marvelous people at Rally!
We all just twinkled at each other and adored each other all week long.
Also Belle was there. She and being-alive are having the most passionate love affair ever, and I want to be exactly like her when I am 66. That is my plan!
Extreme cuteness in the Toy Shop.
We got brand new cuteness in the Toy Shop and it is so cute that I cried.
And then everyone bought everything. Yay.
Wisdom from an unexpected source.
Thanks to Ealasaid for the reading.
Transforming.
I’m part angel now.
It’s not what that sounds like, but I don’t know how to explain it yet. The point is, a really gigantic change that has been on its way for years finally got ACTIVATED, and it was extraordinary.
Loving a thing I used to hate, and getting to feel what that is like.
My least favorite yoga pose, aside from matsyasana (fish pose) and any variation on handstand (I love arm balances, as long as I am not upside down) is ustrasana, camel pose.
I never do it on my own, and in a class I will pretty much always exit about five seconds early.
Sometimes I do it with Bryan, and every once in a blue moon I stay in it the entire time.
Yesterday? I didn’t want to get out of camel pose. I wasn’t done.
What?!?!? That has never, ever, ever, happened, and it never occurred to me that it might. I mean, it’s not my pose. But yesterday it was, and I felt lusciously in it instead of the usual thing which is more like intentional being-present-with-my-discomfort combined with awareness of how intense my discomfort is.
And this is related to all the things that came from the new Shiva Nata stuff, specifically the impervious force field, the new grounding, the new support.
Playing live at the meme beach house — it’s the Fake Band of the Week!
Background? Ez and I make up bands. Stu (retired Bolshevik-fearing voice-to-text software) once translated “people will hate me and be jealous” to “they’ll hang out at my Meme Beach House“. It’s just one guy.
This week’s band is a band I heard of through Danielle:
Jerky Strawberries
They’re loud, raucous, spiritual, dorky and hilarious. They play pirate music! At least I think they do. Though, of course, it’s really just one guy.
Hallo Hallo! I am saying Hallo Hallo. Announcement time.
Picture me wearing that crazy hat…
If you have not been to a Rally (Rally!), get yourself to a Rally.
It’s a thousand billion trillion times more everything than what you think.
Also prices have to go up next month and next month is in like a week or something.
That’s it for me …
Join my Friday ritual in the comments if you feel like it. Or call silent retreat!
We let people have their own experience. We’re supportive and welcoming. And we don’t give advice (unless people specifically ask for it).
Wishing you a glorrrrrrrrrrrrious day, a restful weekend and a happy week to come.
Shabbat shalom.
p.s. It’s fine if it’s not Friday anymore. There’s complete chicken amnesty — join in whenever (or not) and it’s no big deal.
Very Personal Ads #153: a hat for Potter!
Personal ads. They’re … personal! Very.
Each week I write these VPAs to practice asking for what I want. And to get clarity on what that really is, even when asking feels conflicted.
I always get useful information about my relationship with various aspects of the ask. Join in if you like!
VPAs are late this week because I spent the last three days in intense preparation for Rally (Rally!).
Asking, asking, asking. Many wants, in small forms.
Thing 1: Potter wants a hat.
Here’s what I want:
Potter is my mouse (not a real mouse). He is adorable. And maybe four inches tall?
He doesn’t talk very much but when he finally told me his name, he said that he wanted a hat.
It can be a newsies sort of hat or a cap with a feather in it. He feels strongly about this.
Ways this could work:
I have not even the slightest idea.
I’ll play with…
Sitting with him and listening. Then listening some more.
I like it when he talks to me.
Thing 2: ease-filled sovereign announcing.
Here’s what I want:
I need to announce a thing and I need it to happen in a clear, loving sovereign way.
This is a no that is a loving gift.
Ways this could work:
I will have another spectacular shivanautical epiphany and the words will be there.
I’ll play with…
Presence. Perseverance. Pleasure. Possibility. Provision.
Other things that start with P.
Thing 3: oh dear lord a break from this over HSP nightmare.
Here’s what I want:
I have Highly Sensitive Person tendencies all the time, yes, but when premenstrual, certain types of noise drive me absolutely batty.
Right now the handyman is loudly fixing stuff on the Playground roof, the people next door are hammering, there are leaf blowers, and I am this close to having to go up to the roof and hurl people off of it.
I want relief from this immediately.
Ways this could work:
The peacefulness meditation.
Asking the First Mate to call the handyman.
Things could just shift. I could find something useful about this superpower of hypersensitivity. I could find my way back to being a magical unicorn pony again.
I’ll play with…
No advice, please.
But I will use my headphones and next year I will not schedule any teaching to happen while I am anywhere near this state, and also I will abscond to the quietest chrysalis ever.
Thing 4: many small plumlets.
Here’s what I want:
The PLUM is the Playground User Manual.
I need a mini quickstart version of this.
One for Rally, one for Stompopolis, one for communication stuff. One for what I mean when I say that we are on a retreat from care-taking and advice-giving here.
Ways this could work:
Maybe my Rally project will be related to this.
I’ll play with…
Wanting what I want.
Using the shared pool of knowledge concept from the Crucial Conversations book.
Thing 5: [Boston/Astoria]
Here’s what I want:
This is kind of a proxy and kind of not at all a proxy.
I will silent retreat on the details.
It has to do with moths and brackets, but these are also substitutions for substitutions.
It has to do with lusciousness, courage and possibility.
Ways this could work:
One day this week I will wake up and I will know the who, what, when, where, how and why.
Well, maybe not the why. But I’ll settle for the first five.
I’ll play with…
Desire. Deconstruction. Glow-sitting (morning meditation).
Thing 6: passage for Incoming Me.
Here’s what I want:
Incoming Me and I have an understanding.
But we need some quality time together to hash some things out.
I want a certain thing to happen. She knows about doing things that she enjoys and in ways that she enjoys them. I think we need to connect more.
Also she thinks this will help me have an understanding about the HAT. Not Potter’s hat, but a Havi Announces a Thing HAT.
Ways this could work:
Not sure yet.
I’ll play with…
Hope.
Thing 7: working through sadness.
Here’s what I want:
I am feeling sad about two things that didn’t happen this week that I really wanted to happen.
I would like to do something with this well of sadness.
Ways this could work:
The usual destuckification stuff. Processing the process. Skipping some stones. Inventing rituals. Giving myself room to have the sad.
I bet the Floop will help too.
I’ll play with…
Legitimacy and permission.
Progress report on past Very Personal Ads.
Just to update you on what’s happened since last time.
I needed a perfect simple solution to a situation that was reconfiguring, and while it is not resolved yet, it is going more smoothly.
Then I wanted clews for the Room of Mystery! And some of you sent clews! Thank you. Yay, clews! More are welcome too.
I wanted courage and I got it. Just in time too.
There was an ask about progress on a seemingly impossible thing, and there are signs.
I wanted a mini-chrysalis before Rally and that did not happen, which is actually a third thing that I am feeling sad about. So I am going to process that because it is interesting. Why do I not give myself what I need? Aha, because I have rules about what trumps what. I will do some madcap Shiva Nata on that.
Play-filled comment zen. Here’s what I’d love today.
- Wanted: Your own personal ads, small or large. Updates on past ones if you like.
- You can also do these on your own or in your head. You can always call silent retreat!
- Leave your gwishes! Throw things in the pot!
- Things we try to keep away from: the word “manifest”, telling people how they should be asking for things, unsolicited advice.
- VPA amnesty applies, of course. Leave yours any time between now and next Sunday (or whenever, really) — it’s all fine by us!
xox
Friday Chicken #202: One hundred mice will serve lunch.
In which I cover the good stuff and the hard stuff in my week, trying for the non-preachy, non-annoying side of ritual and self-reflection.
And you get to join in if you feel like it.
Wow. I mean, wow. This week was quite a ride.
I may have to chicken a good part of this chicken in code.
Anytime I mention butterflies, this is a good thing. At least I think it is. I have not entirely figured out the code yet.
The hard stuff
Not knowing what I want.
That’s always hard.
Knowing exactly what I want.
Wait, sometimes that’s way harder!
Encountering a whole colony of sad, scared selves.
At first it looked like another collective of monsters, but actually (like with most monsters), these were parts of Me From Then who were in a lot of pain and still hurting.
I found a giant gaping hole of accumulated vulnerability and perceived lack.
I met the me who believes that “being vulnerable is death”. Oh, sweetie. Oh, sweetie.
I met It’s All Going To Blow Up In Your Face.
I met You’re Ruining This By Being You.
And I uncovered a whole band of versions of me who believe that the only way to be safe ever is to Not Show Your Cards.
The good news is that I was able to use all the destuckifying techniques and things we practice at Rally, and come to peaceful resolutions with all of these lost and forgotten aspects of me. But man, it was hard and scary and took up some middle-of-the-night hours.
A lot of old pain. Hi, guys. We’re still here.
Sunday night I skipped a ritual.
And that made everything harder.
Adaptation to change.
It’s one of my superpowers (agility! activate!) but that doesn’t necessarily make it easy, you know?
That one is kind of hard to explain so I’ll just leave it at that.
Falling into old patterns.
I want to eat everything, all the time.
Hormonal ridiculousness that really needs to stop.
The project that was the project of doom.
And then not making anywhere near as much progress on it as hoped.
Lacking the words for a thing that needs words.
Frustrating.
Deliriously short attention span.
Cannot. Focus. Distractor mouse!
I blame the moths and the mice and the roses and the secret conduits and June being delicious.
The gigantic nightmare that was installing air conditioning at Stompopolis.
Basically it took all week and it was loud and horrible. Also it was supposed to happen outside of working hours but it had already been months and we couldn’t wait any longer.
Hellish.
Oh and we had to put all the (incredibly ugly) units on the wall where the stage is, because the neighbors are vindictive asshats who have a grudge against the owner of the building. Long depressing story, but that’s the end of it.
The good stuff
Roses.
This is a proxy and also secret code but also literal truth because OHMYGOD the roses.
Seriously, the roses.
They’re intense.
Being in the sun.
I spent more time in the parks this week and exploring secret neighborhood passages than ever before in my years of living here.
So that was the plus side of having no attention span.
Incoming me is a genius..
Thank god for that.
The door is gone.
There was a door that didn’t need to be there, and it’s been there for years and now it’s gone.
This happened swiftly and easily, and it was the right time.
Also, even though this was a physical door that was very much in reality, it feels like a VERY symbolic thing for other situations.
Tingling.
Everything is tingly and anticipatory and magic, and I am so over the top enamored of June, and everything about June.
Lusciousness! I asked for it and it is here and it is big.
Invisible progresses are still real.
There has been so much movement in the soft, and while it can’t be seen yet, it can be felt.
This is important. This is beyond important. It is vital.
Surprising coincidences.
Much sparkly unlikeliness.
I am enjoying it.
The distraction is a good distraction.
Last week I was also distracted but I was distracted by thinking about a thing that I don’t like.
This week was all about marvelous distractions.
UEFA euro cup.
Everything about that, basically.
Also, in basketball, watching the Heat lose the first game of the finals.
Oh, and did you catch the DNN power rankings for June? Yeah baby. Rose City!
And I didn’t even mention the most astonishingly beautiful thing ever, this article doesn’t even begin to convey how precious and impossible of a day this was. A perfect game. Matt Cain. Unbelievable.
Marisa!
One of my favorite people ever is a) coming to visit me and b) coming to stay!
10:27
And all the 10 27s.
Discovering more about what I really and truly care about.
I’d kind of thought I was an expert in this, but oho!
New discoveries.
Buoyancy.
And sweetness.
Holy crap the Shiva Nata this week.
I did insanely insane things (of insanity!) and the epiphanies were EPIC.
I can’t even talk about how deeply things are coming apart and then coming together better. It’s kind of terrifying. But in a really good way. Shiva Nata. Shiva Nata. Shiva Nata.
Playing live at the meme beach house — it’s the Fake Band of the Week!
Background? Ez and I make up bands. Stu (retired Bolshevik-fearing voice-to-text software) once translated “people will hate me and be jealous” to “they’ll hang out at my Meme Beach House“. It’s just one guy.
This week’s band is a) awesome and b) comes with a story:
Ray and the Liottas
Yes.
So here’s the story.
It was too beautiful a day last weekend to be on a bus or inside, but I had errands to run so I decided to compromise: I’d walk from the Playground to Fremont (maybe twenty minutes?) and then catch the 24.
At the bus stop I met a young man who had been waiting forever for the bus. It then turned out that the bus wasn’t going to come until…a few days later. So he and I walked together for forty five blocks and during this time I learned all there is to know about him, his skateboard, his likes and dislikes and his childhood in Arkansas.
He told me that his roommates have a band called Ray Liotta, and then explained to me that Ray Liotta is an actor. Me, straight-faced, “You’re kidding. What are the chances?”
(And then Henry Hill died, it was kind of a week like that).
Anyway, I pointed out to this kid that his friends’ band has a google problem: namely that no one will ever be able to find them ever.
He was dismayed, because somehow this had not occurred to them. And he said maybe they could change to the Ray Liottas. And I suggested Ray and the Liottas, which is really terrible but he thought it was awesome. He was awesome. Seriously, if I were fifteen years younger I would have totally invited myself to the show.
But of course we all know that …. it’s really just one guy.
Hallo Hallo! I am saying Hallo Hallo. Announcement time.
Picture me wearing that crazy hat…
Come to Rally (Rally!).
It will change EVERYTHING. And yes, that is as scary as that sounds but only before you do it. Because what will actually happen is that the most extraordinary shifts and changes will happen in the unlikeliest ways, with smoothness and grace and whatever else you plant for it at Rally.
You can still make it to Rally #22 (July 23-26) or :there’s one more Rally this year (September 10-13). Next year there will be only two Rallies. And actually one of those might be a Floop Rally, we’ll see about that next week.
Anyway, RALLY! Rally is the most extraordinary thing that I know of. It is otherworldly but you get to take that other world back with you. So. July or September. That’s your only chance until February.
Prices go up next month by kind of a lot. We gave a six month grace period for the in-between prices, and now, astonishingly, that’s almost over. Rally!
That’s it for me …
Join my Friday ritual in the comments if you feel like it. Or call silent retreat!
We let people have their own experience. We’re supportive and welcoming. And we don’t give advice (unless people specifically ask for it).
Wishing you a glorrrrrrrrrrrrious day, a restful weekend and a happy week to come.
Shabbat shalom.
p.s. It’s fine if it’s not Friday anymore. There’s complete chicken amnesty — join in whenever (or not) and it’s no big deal.