What's in the gallery?
We dissolve stuck and rewrite patterns. We apply radical playfulness to life (when we feel like it!), embarking on internal adventures (credo of Safety First). We have a fake band called Solved By Cake. We build invisible sanctuaries, invent words and worlds, breathe awe and wonder.
We are not impressed by monsters. Except when we are. We explore the connections between internal territories and surrounding environment to learn what marvelously supportive delicious space feels like, and how to take exquisite care of ourselves. We transform things.* We glow wild.**
* For example: Desire, fear, worry, pain-and-trauma, boundaries, that problematic word which rhymes with flaweductivity.
** Fair warning: Self-fluency has been known to lead to extremely subversive behavior, including treasuring yourself unconditionally, unapologetically taking up space, experiencing outrageously improbable levels of self-acceptance, and general rejoicing in aliveness.
What's in the gallery?
We dissolve stuck and rewrite patterns. We apply radical playfulness to life (when we feel like it!), embarking on internal adventures (credo of Safety First). We have a fake band called Solved By Cake. We build invisible sanctuaries, invent words and worlds, breathe awe and wonder.
We are not impressed by monsters. Except when we are. We explore the connections between internal territories and surrounding environment to learn what marvelously supportive delicious space feels like, and how to take exquisite care of ourselves. We transform things.* We glow wild.**
* For example: Desire, fear, worry, pain-and-trauma, boundaries, that problematic word which rhymes with flaweductivity.
** Fair warning: Self-fluency has been known to lead to extremely subversive behavior, including treasuring yourself unconditionally, unapologetically taking up space, experiencing outrageously improbable levels of self-acceptance, and general rejoicing in aliveness.
On my mind.
Asking for help.
Close to home.
Portland’s women’s bookstore, In Other Words — which is also really the neighborhood bookstore in Northeast Portland where I live — has fallen on some hard times.
I know, I know. Hard times all over.
But here’s the thing.
It’s a neighborhood bookstore. A non-profit bookstore. The only surviving non-profit women’s bookstore in the country.
And they’re in trouble.
What this is about.
Part of their troubles are the economy. Part of their troubles is the usual small business lack of having one’s act together (guys, your website!).
But, much like (though really actually not at all like) the car companies in Detroit, they are Promising To Make Changes.
In other words, they’re going to take active steps to become a sustainable, thriving business and make some monies. Yay.
And you know what? I actually believe them. If I thought that helping them now would just be throwing money into a gigantic hole, then no, I wouldn’t be giving them anything now. Why prolong the pain?
But the truth is that I believe.
Portland is the kind of city that fights for what it believes in. That’s one of the reasons why I moved here.
We have thriving co-ops. We support local farmers (like our Erika) and local coffee houses and artists. We protest stuff. Loudly.*
*The elder George Bush supposedly once referred to Portland as “Little Beirut” — and don’t think we didn’t earn it.
Anyway, here’s my point. You’d think that a small womens’ bookstore in dire need of $11,000 would be pretty screwed.
But actually they managed to make nearly $7,000 in the 5 days since announcing their state of financial crisis!
They can do this. And we can help.
Buy a book. Buy a couple of books.
Their website is fairly sucky, so I don’t know how much luck you’ll have finding stuff. So let me just tell you what I’m getting and link to those.
- The Urban Homestead: Your Guide to Self-Sufficient Living in the Heart of the City.
Oh my goodness. I can’t wait to read this. - Rock ‘n’ Roll Camp for Girls: How to Start a Band, Write Songs, Record an Album, and Rock Out!
I’m so getting this for all my friend’s daughters, nieces, etc. - The Essential Dykes to Watch Out for
Alison Bechdel is a terrific cartoonist — witty, perceptive and bitingly funny — and I’ve been a huge fan of everything she does since I was in University.
And if Alison Bechdel says we need to support In Other Words, I’m on board. And I would be even if I didn’t live in Portland.
Thanks to Fluent Self reader JoVE for bringing this to our attention.
Another great way to give.
Hooray for “Reasonable Gifting”.
I got an email yesterday from the fabulous Communicatrix herself, asking me to spread the word about this especially awesome and genius thing.
You know when you decide that instead of gifts you’d really rather have the money go to a cause? You want to give to those in need and you want the whole damn thing to be meaningful?
I’m often in this position. And then you start doing that whole “Oh, god, what if the cause that I thought was meaningful isn’t where they would have wanted to donate?” second-guessing-yourself thing.
Charity Checks is a non-profit organization that’s all about solving this.
So this is pretty great.
They let you buy donations in whatever amount and send them to the people you love, who can then decide for themselves where to give the money.
And since there are over a million 501c3s in the United States, they can choose to support pretty much anything that’s important to them.
You get to give something meaningful, without determining what meaningful is for someone else. And you get the tax-deduction, which is nice. And the chosen charity gets 100% of the money.
And it’s a great last-minute gift thing if you need one. So take a look.
You can tell how serious I am …
… by the fact that I just recommended that you go to two seriously clunky and hideous websites.
I never do stuff like that.
In fact, I almost didn’t recommend Charity Checks at all because of the tacky green dollar sign and the fact that they used the word “philanthropreneur”, which is just … ew. Don’t get me started.
But it’s a useful service. It’s not just about giving. It’s not just about the (non-cheesy non-manipulative) power to make changes in the world.
I think we can do good things together.
And speaking of small, modern miracles, happy first night of Hannukah to those of you who are celebrating. Selma and I will try and remember to take pictures and share them on Friday!
P.S. If you didn’t click on the “throwing money into a gigantic hole” link … you know you want to. Do it now.
Friday Check-in #20: Snowpocalypse edition
Because it’s Friday AGAIN. And because traditions are important. In which I cover the good stuff and the hard stuff in my week, trying for the non-preachy, non-annoying side of self-reflection.
And you get to join in if you feel like it.
I’ve been sick all week, so I pretty much missed out on oh, everything as I wasn’t doing much and certainly wasn’t being especially mindful about the rest.
Mostly I was drinking tea and feeling sorry for myself, to be honest.
Let’s see …
The hard stuff
Being sick! Poor me!
Aside from not being able to work, it screws up everything else as well.
My staff and I were having technical issues up the wazoo with The Next Big Thing. And I wasn’t really able to keep up.
Anyway, 99% of what I do involves me thinking. And I can’t really do it when my head is filled with what feels like a mixture of clouds, cotton batting, dry leaves and goo.
The things I normally do that get me back in the swing of things (Shiva Nata, non-sucky yoga, meditating, writing) were also not working.
Well, let’s just say that I couldn’t stop blowing my nose long enough to do them, and probably wouldn’t have felt like it even if I could.
In fact, nothing was working.
As you know if you work with my products, I’m a big believer in what I call “multi-directional work” — using a variety of techniques simultaneously for better effects.
So if, for example, you have a cold, you could do like this:
On the physical level: drink fluids, take naps, give your face steam-baths.
On the energy level: breathing exercises, acupressure, reiki
On the emotional level: talking through emotional issues and themes that might be behind the illness.
On the mental level: same, only with journaling and much more systematically. Dance of Shiva FTW.
On the awareness/spiritual level: meditation, prayer, etc.
The idea is, one level might not be working for you, but as long as you combine you can get through it. I’ve never had this not work.
But this time it didn’t work. Which makes me think, okay, maybe this is just a week off and that’s that. So I’ve been enjoying the week off.
It might have been more fun if I’d had energy to do anything other than blow my nose and make pitiful groaning noises, but what the hell. A week off is a week off.
Snow.
It has been snowing all week in Portland. Which is not what I signed up for.
Please don’t tell me you like snow or that it’s pretty or whatever. I do not care. I hate snow and you can’t make me like it.
Snow reminds me of the incredibly long, incredibly depressing winter I spent in Madison, Wisconsin — an otherwise lovely place — and how all of my skin reacted to the cold by peeling off. Like sunburn only under one’s clothes.
It reminds me of my childhood in Michigan. Going to school in the dark. Coming home in the dark. Cold and scared. Horrible.
It reminds me of being dirt poor in Berlin, with the coal heaters spitting out black smoke and not doing nearly enough to heat the one lonely apartment in an otherwise abandoned building.
Did I add that I was screaming-in-pain ill from an ear infection so disastrous and blood-and-gunk-gushingly gross that the doctor (an ear-nose-and-throat specialist) said she had never seen anything like it?
Don’t talk to me about snow.
Trapped.
As you might have guessed by this point, not crazy about snow. Also the streets were icy. Also I was sick.
So I haven’t left the house since Saturday. Even canceled my acupuncture for today so really, who knows if or when I will ever leave.
This might also be a contributing factor in my new identity as CrankyPants McGrumbleMuffin.
The good stuff
If one must be snowed in, at least it’s in Hoppy House!
Seriously?
If we were still at the old place and I hadn’t left in a week … I’d be clawing the walls right now and throwing the world’s biggest temper tantrum from within my strait jacket.
Luckily, Hoppy House is the perfect place to be trapped. I’ve barely even noticed.
As long as I can snuggle up by the fireplace, eating walnuts and feeling sorry for myself, how bad is it? Not that bad.
You guys rock.
On Friday I had the idea of throwing together a fun, interesting course based on our Blogging Therapy series.
Planned it Saturday. Wrote the post Sunday. Posted Monday. And by early Tuesday afternoon the class was already full.
I remember back when I used to write a regular noozletter. And how much work it was to announce something in a way that people would actually notice it.
And then all the time I’d spend writing promo emails to fill a class. And then all the agonizing over whether it was too much or too little. Ick.
This, if anything, is why this blogging thing is so genius. I didn’t have to sell this class. I didn’t have to promote it.
Wrote about it once. Referenced it once. Linked to it on Twitter once. Done.
One of the things I’m going to be teaching in my Next Big Thing is every single thing I know about what I think of as “hard-to-get marketing”.
In other words, how to demonstrate that what you do is appealing without saying that it’s appealing or going after people and trying to convince them that it’s appealing.
But really, the reason it all works is that you guys are bright, creative fun people and I like you. It just makes the whole thing easier.
So heartfelt thanks to the ten lovely people who grabbed their seats before the doors closed. And to everyone else who expressed interest. And to everyone who generously spread the word and shared their excitement. I adore you all madly.
Speaking of how cool you are …
Remember on Sunday when Kelly put up her personal ad here? Uh, stop sending her stuff!
But wow. It was amazing. She got over sixty responses — each one “thoughtful and delightful” — from the people who read this blog.
Yay. Thank you. I’ll talk more about this later, but for now, just know that you’re awesome.
I love teaching!
This weekend I got to be the “guest expert” person at Jennifer Hofmann‘s Inspired Home Office spa day thing.
And I taught a very silly Shiva Nata class (even though it got mostly snowed out). We were goofy and giddy and giggling, and had the New York Times photographer snapping shots right and left, but we all got some serious head-clearing done.
Fun fun fun.
Is this not the sweetest thing ever?
From one of my readers:
“I love reading your writing. It’s like having your heart put on a cushion and given a cup of tea.”
Oh, what a lovely thing to say. I mean, if one doesn’t take it literally. That would just be disturbing.
I love it.
That’s it for me ….
And yes yes yes, of course you can join in my Friday ritual right here in the comments bit if you feel like it.
Yeah? Anything hard and/or good happen in your week?
And, as always, have a glorrrrrrrrrrrrious weekend. And a happy week to come.
Ask Havi #15: meditation edition
Today’s complicated Ask Havi should really be about twenty Ask Havis. It’s a big question — a very broad question — about my thoughts on meditation.
Thoughts? Since I have far too many thoughts on this subject to possibly contain them in a post or even a series of posts, I’m just going to try and respond with the things I think are most important or most helpful.
And will be leaving lots of stuff out.
So please don’t take this as any sort of complete answer.
Because that would be ridiculously impossible.
But enough with the hedging. Here’s the non-question question:
I saw an article on CNN about using Compassion Meditation to learn to be more empathetic toward people you don’t like. The article specifically mentioned how such meditative practices can give you a more positive view of the world. Of course, it got me thinking.
Do you meditate much? If so, is there any special technique you use? I’ve really only done the breathe in, breathe out thing. When I try to visualize things, my thoughts get really…loud.
I suspect that’s very normal. Isn’t it human nature to think about things we’re told to ignore? Don’t think about the pink elephant…you’re thinking about it, aren’t you? I am.
I do not currently meditate. If I sit, I get uncomfortable very quickly. If I lay down, I fall asleep the moment I relax. I also develop a sudden desire to scratch my nose or crack my knuckles. I understand that during meditation, you don’t need to ban these feelings…just acknowledge them and move on. But I can’t get to the moving on part.
I have often thought something like yoga or tai chi, which involve movement, would be a little easier for me to get into. Holding still isn’t really my forte. Being a yoga expert, I’d love to hear your thoughts on using yoga or tai chi as a meditative practice.
Thanks!
Wow. I’m feeling a bit overwhelmed.
There are more questions in this question than I can answer here. Each aspect of this is a chapter in a book, at least.
But I’m just going to pretend that we’re on a quiz show or a radio interview and that I have to give super quick answers to each one.
Q. “Do you meditate much?”
That depends on your definition of “much”. Compared to my teacher who spends half of each year in a monastery in the Himalayas doing 14 to 20 hours a day of prostrations and silent sitting? Not very much.
But the right amount for me.
My duck and I meditate each morning. Anywhere from twenty minutes to an hour. There was a period of a few months where I’d come out of meditation and it always turned out to be exactly 45 minutes on the dot. But that wasn’t a conscious decision or anything.
After my daily evening yoga practice with my gentleman friend or an afternoon Shiva Nata session with Selma, we also sit for about five minutes or so.
“If so, is there any special technique you use?”
I assume what you’re asking is whether I would recommend a specific technique for you. You don’t want the ones that I use, believe me. Way too complicated.
There are many, many techniques out there and they vary. A lot.
I need to add something here: just sitting or just-sitting-and-breathing is a super-advanced practice. It’s a myth — and an absurd one at that — that we should be able to start there.
Don’t start there.
So many people put so much pressure on themselves because they think they ought to be able to just sit down and focus on the breath. Give yourself a few years before you even try using that as your method. It’s not the place to start.
You’re going to have to experiment a bit.
If visualizing things is stressful, don’t do it. Or: don’t do it for now.
Chanting, mantras, counting prayer beads, pranayama (breathing exercises), repeating a word, keeping your focus on a candle or a picture …
These are all things you can experiment with just to figure out what the sensations that come up are like — for you specifically. And then your practice is just to notice how you react.
And start small for goodness sakes. Five minutes is more than enough to start with.
“Isn’t it human nature to think about things we’re told to ignore?”
Don’t tell yourself to ignore them.
“If I sit, I get uncomfortable very quickly.”
Uh, I’m going to say … that might be your problem right there!
Getting comfortable is important. That’s another myth — that you have to just let yourself be in pain and observe the pain, blah blah blah.
Trust me. Life will give you enough painful situations in which to practice this without you having to recreate it for yourself from scratch each time you meditate.
The first thing I would suggest is to try sitting with your back to a wall, for extra support. Slip a pillow or a folded blanket behind the small of your back so that it isn’t cold or painful.
And then you can put your legs any way that’s comfortable for you. If you fold them, you can prop up your knees with blankets as well.
Just make it a rule that you get to be comfortable. Screw the shoulds and all the “this is the right way to do things and I can’t do it” rules.
Pillows, blankets, blocks, bolsters. Try stuff. See what works.
Also, here’s a revolutionary thought: give yourself permission to move. If you do it consciously and mindfully when you need to, it’s not fidgeting.
In fact, it’s just a natural part of your practice.
Over time, your body will get used to the idea of sitting still and you won’t need to move as much. A good way to help it get better at this is to take some yoga classes. I’d recommend an Iyengar restorative-style class for this just because of the way they teach you to use props.
“I also develop a sudden desire to scratch my nose or crack my knuckles.”
Anyone who says you can’t scratch your nose can go to hell. Go for it. Scratch your nose. I give you permission!
“I understand that during meditation, you don’t need to ban these feelings…just acknowledge them and move on. But I can’t get to the moving on part.”
Right. If you can’t get to the moving on part, that’s the sign that they still haven’t really been acknowledged yet.
Acknowledging is hard work. This can be totally annoying sometimes (sorry!) but yeah, that’s just the way it is. It’s not enough to say “fine, I want to scratch my nose, moving right along!”.
It’s about recognizing that where you are right now in this moment feels uncomfortable. That you are allowed to feel uncomfortable. That you are allowed to hate it. That you are allowed to scratch your nose. That you are allowed to notice that you are upset with yourself for not being able to not scratch your nose.
And then deeper:
That you are allowed to be upset with yourself for being upset with yourself. That you are allowed to think this whole process is annoying and frustrating. That even though you are in a state of deep resistance, this is just where you are at the moment.
That this is temporary and natural and you’re allowed to be there.
Sweetie, right now you’re hurrying the “wanting to move the heck on already” part. It can’t be hurried.
“I have often thought something like yoga or tai chi, which involve movement, would be a little easier for me to get into.”
Yes.
Keep in mind that meditating and meditative are not the same thing, but yoga and other movement practices are useful (and healthy) ways to help prepare your body and your mind for a meditation practice.
Obviously the best way to do that is Shiva Nata (Dance of Shiva), because of the way it makes you use more of your brain than you have ever, ever even thought about using, which ends up with you being able to shut down entirely, but in a good way.
I’ve worked with people (grieving mothers, etc) who were completely unable to meditate due to their extremely stressful situations.
And what we found is that the huge amount of brain power and concentration in Dance of Shiva actually allowed them to finally experience periods of “turning off” and pausing their thoughts.
Which, as you might imagine, is a huge relief to someone in that much pain. If you’re not Shiva-ing it up yet, that’s definitely where I would start. And I’m not just saying that because I’m a big old Shivanaut.
“Holding still isn’t really my forte.”
Yet. 🙂
In the meantime, don’t make it be about stillness.
And if you’re going to start doing yoga, don’t do forms of yoga that focus on sitting still. Again, Dance of Shiva. Or go do a vinyasa class and sweat it out. Then try relaxing.
Sitting still is not a practice for beginners. It is not accessible to most beginners. It’s something you train yourself to do — slowly, gently, lovingly and over time.
That’s like saying that “fixing plumbing isn’t really my forte” or “painting watercolor landscapes isn’t really my forte”. Why would it be?
Most of us do not come naturally to stillness.
That’s enough for now, I think.
Hope that was helpful and not too overwhelming.
And for those of you who aren’t at all interested in starting a meditation practice, I’m going to go ahead and pretend that maybe you picked up some useful concepts that — who knows — might prove to be fun to think about and apply to other stuff you’re working on. 🙂
Blogging therapy: de-shouldifying and some questions
And it’s number eleven in our weekly series about making blogging (or the thought of maybe eventually getting around to it) seem more fun and less scary.
But as we all know, this series is not really about blogging. It’s about working on your patterns and figuring out how to do stuff differently.
Should you happen to feel (no pressure!) like catching up, the rest of the series:
Part 1. What if people are mean to me?
Part 2. What if I throw a party and no one shows up?
Part 3. Why even bother when there are already other people doing it better?
Part 4. What do I saaaaaaaaaaaaaaay?
Part 5. Help! Perfectionism! Gaaaaak!
Part 6. But I’m not an EXPERT!
Part 7. Don’t make me be vulnerable!
Part 8. I just don’t have the time!
Part 9. What if someone READS what I wrote?
Part 10. But I’ll never be popular!
Guilt and Shoulds make everything harder.
And that’s where the stuck happens.
We’ve talked about the “should” patterns a gazillion times before. Like when we talked about how you don’t always have to take a deep breath even though everyone says you should. Or my infamous zero guilt email policy.
But if you’re anything like me, you also tend to forget just how much these old, stuckified patterns of I have to do this and no one will like me if I don’t do that can really mess things up for us.
And I’ve been noticing this pattern coming up a lot in the questions people send me. So I think we need to talk about it.
Basically what I’d like to do is to give you permission to take the various rules and shoulds and “this is how things work” stuff that you’ve learned from all the biggified experts (me and my duck included) and toss it all out the window!!.
In fact, I’d love it if — every time one of those shoulds comes up for you — you’d say to it the following:
Hey, I appreciate that you’re trying to help me out by giving me some guidelines, but I happen to know that there are no shoulds in blogging. Selma the duck said so. It’s my experiment and it’s my experience. So I’m going to do this my way, thanks.
Look how much how easier it gets to deal with blogging questions (fresh from my inbox!) if we start pruning out some of the shoulds:
“I want to start a blog, but I just can’t write as much — or as often –as you do! Impossible.”
Yes. Weirdly, this might be the most common thing I hear.
That because I churn out a ridiculously long essay every day, and you can’t, this is somehow a reason not to blog.
The truth is, I’m defying all the blogging rules and shoulds myself. Conventional wisdom says that posts “should” be about a third as long as mine. Oh well.
You know why I write long posts every day? Two reasons.
1. Because I don’t know how to write short posts. It would be annoying and time-consuming for me to have to write short posts. And 2. because my morning writing ritual is therapeutic and healing for me. It feels good.
But that’s no reason that you should write long posts. Your post could be a sentence. Or a link. Or a thought. Or a collection of thoughts.
It’s your thing. The popularity of this very blog that you’re reading right now is proof that conventional wisdom is a load of crap. Or at the very least, that it doesn’t hold for all situations.
Everyone told me, “No one will read posts this long.” Turns out my people will.
Your right people will want the stuff you do in exactly the way that’s right for you to do it.
Not only do you not need to write posts of a certain length, there’s also no reason that you should post every day. Why don’t you start with once or twice a week and see how that feels? Get a rhythm going. Your own rhythm.
If you find that you, like me, get addicted to a morning practice of writing, go with that. But that doesn’t mean you have to publish everything you write. There are no obligations. It’s all practice.
“I want my blog to support my business, but the business doesn’t exist yet. Does it make sense for me to start blogging now?
Yes.*
*When you remove a hundred layers of shoulds, there’s really only ever either a YES or a “I really truly don’t want to and I don’t have to, so no.” In this case, it’s a yes.
“I want my blog to support my business, but the business seems to be constantly changing. I’m not sure yet what I do.
Oh, my dear sweet you. I know how this feels.
Identity crises are a natural part of owning a business. Your business will change shape and keep on changing.
That’s because your business is alive.
And just like your life and your business, blogging is a living, dynamic process. It will change. Steadily and regularly.
The good news though is that you won’t need to do a total overhaul of your blog or your business each time this happens if you remember that the heart of your business is you, wherever you are right now.
YOU are the the center. Your voice, your personality, you.
What I mean is that if your voice and your way of being become the reason we want to hang out with you, it won’t matter much how your blog or your business shift.
I could announce tomorrow (don’t worry, I won’t!) that from now on I’m not going to talk about patterns, habits, fear, guilt, stucknesses, biggification and business-growing.
I could tell you that my plan is to talk about relationships. Or what my yoga practice has taught me about working with addiction. Or even about why I never eat dessert, don’t believe in Mt. Hood and am afraid of dipthongs.
Sure, I’d lose some of you. But most of you would keep on hanging out here. Because it would still be entertaining and we’d still have fun. Plus you know you can’t break up with Selma. Just look at that schweet little face!
Point is: it doesn’t matter.
Toss out that annoying little should. Let things change and evolve as they will. Be yourself and have some fun with it. It will find its form. And your right people will know it when they see it.
A couple more?
Guess what. We can do the same reassuring should-tossing thing for questions about the Blogging Therapy course happening — ohmygod — this weekend:
“I want to take your Blogging Therapy course but I already have a blog.”
Good. We can still zap your fears (but nicely!) and answer your what-ifs and what-about-thats if you’re already blogging it up. You’re welcome to come.
Unless the only thing you’re interested in is getting traffic. If that’s your only thing, wait for a different class.
There’s no rule that says you have to have a blog — or that you can’t have one yet — in order to start using techniques that help you consciously, actively move through the things that are scaring you and holding you back.
If you’ve got stuck stuff around blogging and/or how-to questions of the sort that will never get answered here because I don’t like writing about tech-ey stuff, this is for you.
“I so want to do this course but I still haven’t read all your Blogging Therapy posts! Gak! Sorry. Will I be out of the loop?”
Permission to not have read my stuff? Granted. Show that should the door!
We’ll be covering stuff there that hasn’t come up in the posts, and also going way deeper with some that did. Having to read this stuff could give you some background, but it’s certainly not a requirement.
Should should should should should.
I know it’s not easy interacting with shoulds. And it’s even harder to be nice to them.
The main thing to remember is that you don’t want to ignore them because that makes them louder. And you don’t want to stomp on them because that makes them mad.
A little acknowledgment goes a long way: I see you, I hear you, I know you’re there.
And then tell them that you’ll be able to get a lot more done and get it done faster if they give you a break. Send them out to buy snacks or something. And then gradually replace them.
Last minute stuff.
Right. So the Screw Therapy and Start Blogging course that still doesn’t really have a name is this weekend.
I announced it yesterday and it’s already over half full. Actually, there are four spots left. If one of them is yours, yay! I would love to hang out with you there.
To answer some more questions: no, I’m not going to record.
Apologies to the Aussies and Kiwis and South Africans and the woman in India and everyone who has plans over the weekend. This is an intimate group and we’re talking about intimate stuff, and I want it to be a safe, cozy place for us to open up in.
As for “will I do it again?” … yes. However — and this is kind of a big however — I need to tell you something.
As some of you know I’m about to launch my Next Big Thing. I wasn’t going to say this yet because I really don’t want to be hyping it up. I’m really hoping that only my right people will end up applying for it.
But, just so you know, everyone who signs up for both Blogging Therapy classes will get to take that tuition off of the Thing I Can’t Tell You About Yet.
So if you’re thinking about this course and you’re planning on doing the New Thing That I’m Not Supposed To Talk About But Embarrassingly Can’t Stop Talking About with me anyway, just do it now so that you’re not mad at me when the New Thing happens.
We’re done.
Tomorrow we get to goof off again, and then we’re back to Blogging Therapy next week. See you there. *blows kiss*
[Ed. Just to say that registration for the Blogging Therapy course I mentioned here closed a few hours after I posted this. So if you’re not in this one I’ll see you in the next one. Thanks guys!]
Screw the therapy. Start blogging.
Last Tuesday we were doing our usual Blogging Therapy thing, and I ended up wondering out loud about who among my lovely readers was putting this stuff into practice.
In other words, which people had either started a blog, revived a blog or restructured a blog after getting all hot and bothered (in a good way, yes?) by this series.
Partly because I was wondering whether these posts were having any effect in the real world, other than making people feel better.*
*Which is also important — I’m not trying to downplay the sparkly wonder that is feeling better … yay for feeling better.
And partly because I could really use some more good stuff to read.
And not just to read, but to be able to tell people about. Stuff that’s so real — so alive — that reading it will help the people I care about feel joyful and reassured and full of love.
Ahem, I’m talking to you, Ms Wormy! Tell me when I can link to you!
But I digress.
Here’s what I’ve learned, so far:
Eight people reported that this series lit the spark and gave them that friendly push to go ahead and launch a blog already.
Five people said they’d drastically changed the focus/style of their blog due to this series.
Also we’ve got two resuscitations of blogs that had been fairly neglected.
And I’ve lost count of the number of people who wrote and said that they’re feeling good about moving forward with this, and will be working on writing some exploratory posts over their holiday vacation in the upcoming weeks.
No really, I have lost count. Don’t make me go back and count them.
Additionally, three clients that I had sessions with with this week also mentioned their plans to “get this thing rolling already”. And there was much rejoicing.
Which gave me an idea …
Actually, that wasn’t at all what gave me the idea. What gave me the idea was a very intense round of wacky yoga brain training, but I’ll tell you about that on Friday.
Getting to the point …
If you guys (or several of you, at least) are going to be spending a good part of the holidays making progress on blogging it up — or on thinking about blogging it up — I am committed to making space where I can be there with you to hold your hand.
If you want me there, of course.
So I’ve put together a mini-course. A Let’s Get This Show On The Road course. A Screw Therapy and Get Blogging course.
A You Know, Even if You’re Not Ready Yet, I Love You Just The Same So Please Let Me Whisper Sweet Words of Guilt-free Encouragement In Your Ear Course.
Fine, so I don’t really have a name for it. That’s not the point.
There are two (well, three) parts to this course.
Class #1: Moving through the fear
A small, cozy group of us spends two hours together working on the various fears and scariness that comes up for us around this theme. Taking what we’ve started in the Blogging Therapy series and going way, way deeper.
I won’t try to talk you out of being scared, because that would be obnoxious. You’re absolutely allowed to have as much fear as happens to be there at the moment.
We’ll use some great techniques to make things feel more comfortable and more do-able, but no one will tell you that you’re wrong to be afraid.
By the end you’ll feel that tingly excitement of possibility. The spark. We love the spark.
And in addition to being destuckified, you’ll also have some Useful Tricks for calming yourself down whenever you need it.
Class #2: Oh, the technical details
This is where you bring all your “what-ifs” and “I don’t know how to do thats”.
My duck will be there and my wonderful web-guy/designer genius will be there for extra support.
And if there is anything that comes up that one of us isn’t able to answer, we have access to a whole cadre of biggified experts, so you will absolutely get answers on whatever it is.
Two hours on working through stucknesses that are related to the technical side of things or the fear of the technical side of things. And you’ll come out of it knowing what all your Next Steps are.
But I thought you said there were three parts!
There are. Kind of.
You can do the classes individually, or sign up for both together, which saves you money and also gets you an invitation to the mysterious Part Three.
Should you decide to sign up for both, you get invited to a follow-up class (Class #3), which happens two weeks later. That’s where you get to show up with every single question or worry or setback that came up for you during the two weeks you were working on it or thinking about it.
And Selma and I will help you with them.
Small print, sign-up details, etc.
Each class by itself is $99. Selma and I would love it if you’re able to do both, which you can do for $129 all told, and that also gets you an invite to class #3 — my treat!
Classes happen by phone — you’ll get a call-in number. But we won’t spend the whole time on the phone. You’ll also get a short chunk of time to yourself to work on an assignment.
Class 1 is Saturday December 20th
Class 2 is Sunday, December 21
Class 3 (if you’ve signed up for both 1 & 2) is Sunday, January 4th.
All classes take place from from 12:00 pm – 2:00pm PST.
If you’re not sure what time that is for you, ask the time converter nicely and he’ll tell you.
But yeah, that’s this weekend!!
Limited to ten people in each class. First come first served and all that.
Sign up happens right here:
If you’re reading this in a feed and can’t see the buttons, just click through because they’re definitely here!
[Ed. This course sold out in a day and a half. Thanks guys!]
And now for an apology and an unrelated gripe …
Apologies to everyone reading today who couldn’t care less about this.
I’m sorry. That’s no fun for you. Luckily, we’ll be back to working-on-your-stuff stuff tomorrow!
Yes, I said stuff stuff. Because I can.
But I mainly said it to get back at Lauren Collins for saying “de-stuffification” in the last New Yorker. Ahem. Lauren, we all know you’re a fine writer. You don’t need to steal my made-up words and then rejigger them for a restaurant review. Really!
Also, is de-stuffification supposed to be a removal of stuff or a removal of stuffiness? One hardly knows.
*sniff*
That’s it!
See you guys tomorrow with real, live Blogging Therapy …