Hello, week: we are here.

Thank you, week. Thank you, space to reflect.

{a breath for being here when we get here}

This is week 426 of this ritual, and so we chicken.

What’s been working? What do I want to play with….

Being in water.

Breathing for the hard, challenging and mysterious.

I am not going to enumerate the hard things of this week because there was only one for me*, but oh was it a big one, and it happened this morning.

Actually, funny story that is not really funny, I had intended to write up the chicken last night, completely flummoxed as to how to begin: after over eight years of writing up the hard and good of each week, here was a peaceful, inspiring, beautiful, transformative week with no hard. High on life!

Anyway, I ended up not having to solve that mystery because I took some [legal-in-some-places] pain relief for cramps, aka high on things other than life, which I haven’t done in oh maybe twenty years now. This rendered me completely useless, and somewhat paranoid, so I decided to snuggle up in bed with all the pillows instead.

This morning my friend who owns the house dropped by and said “hey do you want to hang out in the pool for a bit in the rain before I do all the house things”, and I was like, OF COURSE, I am the piscean queen of hanging out in water, I literally spent four hours a day this week in your pool in the rain…

Then my friend casually mentioned a situation that he assumed I knew about, except I did not know about it because someone in my life had chosen to omit this [set of pieces of information], and then I don’t really know what happened because I think I went into shock.

I was in the pool, flabbergasted, everything slow motion. And then I was in front of the house, walking very fast in the direction of the road, walking large wild circles on the wet grass in the rain, wearing only a towel over my bathing suit and the wind was cold and I am not entirely clear on how I got there or how long I was there doing the circle thing. And then I was back in the pool but I don’t remember going back to the pool.

I stayed there for a very long time, in a state of grief and bewilderment because the things I thought I knew weren’t making sense, and my friend felt awful.

I noticed all the ways that now was reminding me of then: the other time someone who loves me hid a vital piece of information from me, wanting to protect me from pain, and how awful it was to find out a different way. I breathed the breath of Now Is Not Then.

I am okay now. I have trust that it will be easily cleared up and resolved. I know what questions I want to ask myself, what superpowers I want to call on. But there you go, that was the hard of my week. Good thing I waited too, because where is the balance in only good.

Inhale, exhale. May all misunderstandings and distortions, internal and external, dissolve in love if not in laughter. May peacefulness prevail. Trust-more love-more release-more receive-more. Goodbye (and thank you), mysteries and hard moments of this week.

Breathing for the good, reassuring, and magical!

• There were many, many wonderful things this week, and if I were not still rattled from this morning, I would be adding a hundred exclamation points to each of them. Breathing awe and appreciation for wild wonder and joy and the many miracles of this week.
• Warm water is my big healing, and I was able to spend hours and hours each day in the pools that are heated by hot springs, and it was heaven. Breathing for this is where I need to be.
• Hip pain disappeared! I can sit again! Breathing for things move and change.
• Wrote two ebooks in three and a half days, the only time I’ve ever had a writing streak like this before is at Rally. It was kind of incredible. Breathing for being in my power.
• Two spectacular nights of dancing. The dance superpower that I have been working on forever and doesn’t really have a name but is something like [I am So Completely Relaxed, Positive, Confident and Creative, At Ease In My Body, At Ease Taking Up Space, At Ease Being Fabulous, I Shine & Glow] kicked in unexpectedly, and I had a blast. Breathing for play.
• A very surreal and hilarious birthday party — also in the pool, everything this week was in the pool — showed me to what extent in my life I want what I have and have what I want. Breathing for treasure, and the ability to recognize it.
• Big big big big clarity! Breathing for this certainty.
• Repeat from last week: No news is good news! Feeling so much more peaceful because I had not even realized how much this sensitive soul needed to withdraw. Breathing for spaciousness, may my own peace spread outward into the world of news and do good somehow.
• Wild hot sweetness, vulnerability, intensity, love. Breathing for this beating heart and this happy body.
• All my crises resolved themselves this week, easily and without much effort, not sure how that big magic happened but I suspect the moon had something to do with it. Breathing for ease.
• Met a new version of Incoming Me, and she is breathtaking in her radiance. Breathing for getting to know these aspects of myself that I could not have even imagined existed.
• Thankfulness. Feeling aware of the good fortune in my life in the form of loving-hearted people, meals that make me clap my hands with delight, the still-incredible moon. Everything is okay and so much is good. Nothing is wrong, even when I want to believe it is. Now is not then. All Timing Is Right Timing. Thank you for this grand adventure. A full breath of deep appreciation in my thank-you heart.

Superpowers.

Last time I wanted the power of I Close All The Doors That Need Closing, Easily, With Great Assurance and With Love. I did not expect to get this, because it seemed so impossible, but then it just happened.

So now I am asking for the superpower of Amazing Ease, Grace and Steadiness, so that this wobbly situation becomes something that is no big deal, and I do not fear wobbliness because I adapt easily and I have (haha, yes, okay, I see what is happening here) Amazing Grace.

Grace like awe and source, and grace like magnificence and wonder, and grace like not falling on my face, or at least doing it in style like I meant it.

Announcement time….

Quieting the monsters is one of the most useful self-fluency skills there is. You can buy the monster manual which is available here, and it is enormously useful if you would like to practice being Way Less Impressed with the horrible things that internal critical voices say. And it comes with a coloring book.

How was your week?

Come play in the comments. Share something from your week, take a breath, or just say hi! No rules, my format doesn’t have to be yours, we’ve been doing this every week for years now and there still isn’t a right way.

Everyone belongs. We let people have their own experience. We’re supportive and welcoming. We lovingly refrain from giving advice.

And of course it’s always okay to comment under a made-up name, whether for play and delight, or in the interest of Safety First.

Wishing you a glorrrrrrrrrrrrious day, a restful weekend and a happy week to come.

It’s fine if it’s not Friday anymore. There’s complete chicken amnesty — jump in whenever you like. Blowing kisses to the Beloved Lurkers too!

this is the 375th week of wishing, come play!

live

the full moon said

DO NOT UNDERESTIMATE YOUR POWER
DO NOT UNDERESTIMATE YOUR STEADY GRACE

the full moon said I need to use my power and my steady grace
to live by my power and my steady grace
and to glow wild

live by the moon

I am okay with this mission,
this moonbeam mission,
it works for me
that doesn’t mean I know how to do any of this
(power and steady grace aren’t exactly things I have fully figured out yet)
just that I say yes

possible meanings of “live by the moon”

be outdoors
be outdoors more
be connected to moon times
go out and see the stars
live in a round house that is secretly a planetarium,
the one that is in my dreams

though, yes, also
to live by the moon could mean
live according to this moon wisdom
live according to these startlingly clear guidelines and instructions

what else do I know about this that I don’t know that I know?
let’s skip some stones

what do I already know about living by the moon?

cycles
repetition
ebb and flow, wax and wane
pull and the wild magic of tides as
the moon’s gravity pull on our oceans
and orbit: it swings on an orbit, like in dance
oh, and the moon has dancing dust

what do I want that the moon has?

sometimes the moon is like, HEY BEHOLD MY RADIANCE
and you gasp in awe because it is so absolutely spectacular
then at other times it’s just hanging out in the background,
half-invisible

I want that ability, to turn my shine on when it’s the time for shining
then fade into the sky when I want to be incognito

what else do I know about living by the moon?

I have wished a wish like this before
but different
in May of 2015
a wish called moon wishes about, among other things,
aligning my cycle with the moon
or really, letting those cycles do what they want, together

I have wished wishes about naming the moon
or letting the moon name itself

and recently I wrote this about Incoming Me:

Adrianna is the dark and the moon and the tides and the pull
the long slow kiss
and the moment before the moment before
and then sleeping in, surrounded by cushions
Adrianna is devoted to being,
letting things be revealed in their own time

what am I like when I live by the moon?

brave
steady
glowing
dancing
smiling
calm and still
patient
playful
creative
wild
alive

not apologetic about my intensity
not apologetic about my quiet

what does the me-who-already-lives-by-the-moon want me to know?

she:

when you see a crescent moon, there isn’t any less of the moon,
it’s just the play of light and reflection

what would I tell someone whose wish was to live by the moon?

there is nothing wrong with hiding
there is nothing wrong with glowing
there is nothing wrong with wanting both of these at once

what will help me meet the version of me who already lives by the moon?

less input
stronger force fields
more entry
get into the water
less is more

what kind of less?
this kind of less: crown on

what do I know about my wishes?

these are wishes about simplicity,
living in integrity,
aligned with [whatever is meaningful for me in this moment]
and right now that’s the moon and this
powerful set of instructions that I am
a bit hesitant to unpack
but that’s okay
I can dance around them a while longer
and trust that whatever needs to be revealed will be revealed

(this is also a wish about that)

the superpower of I Am So Very Clear

August was MUSE, with the superpower of Deep Listening, and now we are in the month of INTENTION and I Am So Very Clear

there is so much in this too that I had not anticipated: Clear Knowing, Discernment, Resonance, Transparency, all the many beautiful forms of clear

thank you, past-me, for being such a good namer and calling this into being

last week’s wishes

last-week-me wished a wish called the wandering wish book
and everything about it was just right
it told me I needed to set a clearer trajectory
and I have

invitation: come play with me…

you are invited to share this post and to share many !!!!!! about what is here,
or share appreciation or anything sparked for you while reading, including any stories you wish to let go of, any adventures you wish to welcome

deposit wishes, gwishes, superpowers, qualities, ingredients, intel, possibly in code

safe space for creative exploration asks us to let go of care-taking and advice-giving

wishes are never late because whenever you wish is the right time for wishing

here’s how we meet each other’s wishes: oh, wow what beautiful wishes

♡

Idaho is pretty. 

My hips still don’t like to sit unless it’s on the grass with my notebook, so we are going to do week 374 of wishing wishes by peeking at the wishbook!

The Wandering Wishbook of Stella the Star

I wish to name my wishes, to trace the sparks of my desire…

Oh those whispered truths of 4am

What is clear?

What do I know about my wishes?

I see that I am wishing for Clarity in the form of…

• making space for my desire to make itself known
• remembering not to freak out — the clues are here!
• I want to get so clear that the obvious clues are obvious even before I ask to see them
• the path reveals itself/trust that the path is revealing itself
• clear intentions for trajectory (I may not know where I’m going or how I’m getting there but I can set a trajectory of qualities: Clarity, Intention, Trust, Glow)
• clear water, clear skies, clear headspace, less input and more intentional output, clear as a bell
• A clear view of the stars, and the ability to be aware of my own glow, my own sense of meaning inside of any given constellation in my life

Breathing for these wishes

Oh wow what beautiful wishes!

Come share yours.

As always, we keep this a gloriously safe space by meeting ourselves and each other with love, while adhering to the twin practices of not caretaking and not giving advice, assuming good intentions. Love from the road.

Hello, week: we are here.

Thank you, week. Thank you, space to reflect.

{a breath for being here when we get here}

This is week 424 of this ritual, and so we chicken. Also, my hips hurt which means I can’t sit and type, so I drew the chicken instead.

What’s been working? What do I want to play with?

Taking breaths for the hard, challenging and mysterious.

Breathing for the good, reassuring, and magical.

Superpowers?

This week I had the power of not caring about the outcome, and I want the powers of pre-emptive entry aka the ability to quickly establish strong force fields.

How was your week?

Come play in the comments. Share something from your week, take a breath, or just say hi! No rules, my format doesn’t have to be yours, we’ve been doing this every week for years now and there still isn’t a right way.

Everyone belongs. We let people have their own experience. We’re supportive and welcoming. We lovingly refrain from giving advice.

And of course it’s always okay to comment under a made-up name, whether for play and delight, or in the interest of Safety First.

Wishing you a glorrrrrrrrrrrrious day, a restful weekend and a happy week to come.

It’s fine if it’s not the weekend anymore. There’s complete chicken amnesty — jump in whenever you like. Blowing kisses to the Beloved Lurkers too!